It’s there,
Where water meets fire,
Where lightings strikes the ground.
That’s where my heartbeat goes.

My chest feels like it was filled
With tampered strings.
Once so sharp and precise,
Now dull and inconsistent.

Mother always asks where my love is.
I tell her it hasn’t moved in years.
Her dumbfound look
Meets my half smile.

How do I lie to a broken mirror?
Where even my reflection is fake.
How do I mute the cannon fire,
Deep within my chest?

The hole from within
Draws me closer.
The apathinc grin,
Natural for her.

I dream of clarity.
Of the warmth of arms.
Love’s brutal rarity.
The storms and the calms.

In between sleep and death,
Where my thoughts meet you,
I release my last breath,
Finally anew.

For it was your name
Which had sparked this lust.
On me falls the blame.
In you, did I trust.

Next time
Stop me
From loving
Someone who’d
Feed me
Sand instead of
Sugar.

Next time tell me you don’t care.
So I don’t start caring.

Next time push me away before I,
Come close to, you.

Next time won’t be like before.
I’ll rather my heart meet a dagger,
Than go through what I did with you.
I’d wish such rage, such anger
On no man, your presence left an insatiable hunger.

So please, next time we kiss,
Don’t be shy.
Spit your poison into me,
I’m no longer afraid to die.

I will not stand for the absence.
The fight for survival in my own skin,
Sown onto me, like some wasted fabric.
Nailed to my bones like the child of God.

For someone so alone and so strong,
It gets tiring to hear the same song.
The anthem of nothing.
The joy of relief.

When the pain is gone,
An even worse enemy steps to the stage.
His enemy is love.
He goes by the name, rage.

I haven’t a gun.
I’ve hit no one.
A failure of great proportions,
Emotional extortions,
And mental abortions.

This world is more cold than not.
How is my heart not to willow and rot?
Every word I hear
Each one that passes through my ear,
I can’t help but not to feel fear.

Fear for all of that which I do not have.
The only option is to halve
My soul into two.
Even then it would have been too few.
Oh God, what do I do?

I must find the answer!
And relieve myself of this growing cancer.
“Who are you?” you may ask,
I’ll say nothing, all the talking will be done by my mask.

In this land of fair and free,
Lived those crossed into three.
Men, women, children and more,
Who were different, but alike in the core.

Decades pass, still tensions rise.
A land cannot contain a people of this size.
War tore it once, twice, more times than I can count,
It’s a ridiculous amount!

From fire born in our hearts
We can unite through the arts.
Instead of teaching our sons how to fire guns,
We can teach them how to be sons.

The coldest of winters cannot separate us anymore.
I swear this, there won’t be another war!
This is our time, the time for the young to beat the old,
Who, our heritage, sold,
Whose hearts turned cold.

I crave the scent of skin
And all its distractions.
The storm brewing within,
And the silent actions.

When Gods test their might,
Bring forth their glory,
Light turns day to night.
One word, one story.

Never will there be
Such craving and lust.
As when I met thee.
My heart is now dust.

The seeds of ice were set
Into the cold ground free.
Where fire met cold and wet.
Where shouts, became a plea.

Love is no longer a warm room
It’s more of a fridge.
Once hot and steamy
Now cold and wet.

Some might say
That, love is, just an emotion
A chemical process
A biological fact

And… They’re right
However, to us
It is so much more
And so less

Love can be higher than life
The light in a never-ending tunnel
The fire in a sealed jar
The warmth in a concrete cell

Love is hearing your name through her voice
It’s knowing the truth and being happy with it
The inspiring feeling, pushing you further and further
It’s the silence in your head, because it’s too busy with thinking about her

To us
Love is
More than
A feeling

Five years and all I have left
Is her name and the feelings she gave.
It was a heinous crime, a theft.
Still, I want her on my grave.

On that day, the Sun shone,
As it always would.
This was before her throne.
A finer time, you might call it good.

Dubrovnik’s walls stood tall,
Yet her beauty couldn’t be contained.
The city would fall,
Her grace was untamed.

To the sky they flocked.
The birds of black.
Shining rays they blocked.
The sky would shatter, and crack.

Cobble streets and busy crowds.
Amongst them you were there,
The heavens were clear, no clouds.
Your gaze left me gasping for air.

One word lead to another,
Before you know it I was hooked.
She was something else, something other.
Something the Gods overlooked.

In my cage everything was perfect,
The real world, however, was not as joyful.
I left my world undefended, and got it wrecked.
Grief, misery, death and death!

After the collapse of my star,
The only thing which kept me sleeping at nights.
I dream of a distant place, somewhere far.
When I close my eyes I still see her shining lights.

My heart is now a furnace,
Dishing out black smoke, my love.
Its fuel is your name and its sternness,
It burns with the hate for the love I promised you, sweet dove.

The keys to my eternity
Once lay in your hands.
That which makes my identity
Flows, like shifting sands.

When at dusk I call your name
I start the dance and the game.
For the crimson dawn,
Rose, as you went… gone.

If only you had treated my heart
Like more than a piece of frozen meat.
Thank you still, for awaking my art,
While you skipped across glass, with bare feet.

Your skin was the hearth during snowfall,
Yet you still had the absolute gall
To claim everything which was once mine.
Between love and power, is a thin line.

Snow always gave me hope.
As it would fall and fall
It would remove the rope,
Stringed between me and all.

It showed me how footprints
Left their mark after dark.
Thrown around like lil hints
All around our still park

As the fragile snowflakes,
Like me, fell to their doom.
The rose’s right it takes.
Its holy right, to bloom.

Yes, I’m the one who did it.
I put it there to remind you what once was.
And what could have been.
Now it’s just a melody, which falls on deaf ears.

It could have been a symbol of hope, if you wanted it to.
It could have been a callback to a simpler time, if you wanted it to.
It could have been a pleasant smile, if you wanted it to.
Of course, you didn’t.

You’d much rather have a loud voice in your head.
Or a knight on a horse without legs.
You couldn’t love a bird missing a few feathers.
I hope you’re happy, no I don’t.

The wall will dry and crack, but the mark will stay.
It will serve as a beacon, a lantern for the future.
What once could have been a show of imperishable love,
Is reduced to a simple drawing on a plain white wall.

My bones break
Under the strain
Of words, fake,
Drowning in rain.

These bones are made of chalk,
Often times too hard to walk.
Despite these times of rage,
Still, I can turn the page
And look into the eyes
Of my own true demise.

These bones, chained
Under the weight
Are left maimed.
No choice, but wait.

These sticks of pale wood break,
Just as the soul can ache.
Under the cracking bones,
Left beneath hollow stones,
Is my own fragile mind.
Feelings I’ve yet to find…

Labels and biased stickers,
Sharp whispers and evil snickers,
Dimmed hallways,
And a never-ending craze.
Three minutes, no two!
What do you want to do?
Come on, you have to say it, you!
Let this shroud darken your view.

On the street, men with two left hands,
Assault orders, without plans.
Where God has left his mercy,
So too, lies his hypocrisy.
Say it now!
Hurry quick, it’s something I’ll allow.
One solemn verse, one final vow.
Tell me how you’ll end your days, how?

Freedom of speech, but no freedom of choice.
So much sound, yet not a single voice.
I come from a sea, loud and wild,
The last time I smiled, was when I was a mere child.
But now I stand and bask in my glory.
I will not be classified in any category!
I will scream and tell my story!
Death is certain, but life is mandatory.

When I say “hold me”
I don’t just mean “don’t let me go”.
I want you to bring me as close as possible
And make our heartbeats align

In that one moment,
In that perfect embrace,
Our souls fused into one.
I could see it on your face.

If I wasn’t mortal
I wouldn’t have let you go.
I couldn’t freeze time then,
Still, I relive that second every day.

While I thought that everything was going to be fine,
You found the time to sharpen your knife.
And while I brought you close to my heart,
The blade struck deep and it cut me open.

As I lay here now,
With my final breath making its way home,
The last name I can think of
Is yours.

A late night with friends,
I have come home at last.
The pain in my head is ceaseless,
My body reeks of ash.

That is the smell of my city,
Soot and smoke,
Its anthem?
The murmur of the crowds.

All of them are idividuals of their own
Yet we walk, breathe and talk as one.
Day, night, rain, or whichever time
I'll still love this merry city of mine.

Yes, wash me away,
And all my colors too.
Once ornated with the shades of life,
Now broken and gray.

We enter the halls of society
And exit perfect people,
That is,
If we ever leave.

They have us believe that we are unique
Yet they scrape what individuality we have,
Like fingers across a blackboard.
The light is fading away.

Maybe we should put on some wool and really become sheep,
Because the world’s wolves are howling for blood,
And we will give it to them for their attention.
We are as blind as we are stupid.

After the cycle is complete,
Do with me as you please.
My colors run cold,
In the deep blue river we call life.

O, brother of blood!
My born bud.
Fate has brought us close,
Even though this isn’t what I chose.

Pointy tongues and snickering smirks,
The rude comments and the other works
Are way too common for me.
Let me show you what I see!

I see a boy who has been robbed.
Someone whose right was mobbed.
His right to choose,
Whose love is whose.

Just because the same river flows within
Doesn’t mean I’ll be there when
Your call reaches my weary ears.
Each letter of your name draws tears,
Even after all these long years.

Someone please come, save me.
I’m drowning in a dried up sea.
I can’t handle the broken things.
Stringless puppets and birds without wings.
God tore me down one last time.
As I enter this rhyme,
He doesn’t know that I’m still in my prime.
Why did the all-mighty commit such a fearsome crime?
I have nothing left, I must submit and give in to the chime!

Here I stand now, at the edge of reality,
As the shameless light approaches I take a knee.
“Come now, take me!” I utter in unwavering pride.
How can I fear sleep, when I’ve already died?
The high evening tides can't wash away my blood.
It’s become one with the soil, now crimson mud,
Oh, Poseidon, unleash thy flood!
As my body falls to the ground, hear my deafening thud,
Take out your shovels and dig me a grave, yet better, a spud!

No more oceans and no more seas, just the roof and me,
One lonely whisper, one final plea.
Come back, and I swear you won’t regret it,
Come back before I lose what soul I have, this little spirit.
Cool air and a starry night,
Have I lost the war after this fight?
You didn’t break my heart, you took out an entire bite,
But I will not waver, I will live on, in your spite.
Why do I do this, from the dark evening, until morning’s light?
Try all I might,
You are the only thing, about which, I can write…

How can you be so bold
As to paint with your tongue?
Silver words turned to gold,
Serpent long.
After me you’d go for more,
You’ve never seen true war,
The one which rages deep within.
Why does your love taste like sin?
Go to his arms,
See if I care.
His lungs don’t need any air.
I can’t bear any more of your charms.
How did diamonds turn to dust?
Just like, into air, did too our trust.

How can you keep a smile,
After you warrant so many tears?
It’s become something vile,
A curse, lost to the years.
My heart feels the breaking of chains,
My veins are the train tracks and your eyes, the trains,
A full stop is all I need,
But that’s no problem for you, you’re filled with greed.
Go, pull your inept strings!
Your melody can’t soothe me.
I don’t have to run anymore or flee
From all the scorching question and eerie things.
My embrace was crafted for you,
I tell myself that sweet lie that will never become true…

I loved you…

What good is it to stare at a blank wall?
We get nothing from it.
Tearing that wall down didn’t make me feel any better,
Still I did, I had to try.

There was no connection.
It was as malicious as malicious gets.
No, actually, there was a bond,
But it was one of greed, not love.

I needed you, and the love only you could give.
But there was none!
How could I have spent so many days
Blind, but able to see?

For two years, I fed myself on air, instead of love.
For so much time I’ve eaten nothing
I’m starving for love!
The love she promised me.

Tell me darling,
Was my name ever in your mind?
I’ll tell you now,
My mind was you.

It was the way you move your hair
From your face after you get excited.
The way your eyes stare deep into everything.
Just like mine…

Oh the heavens are cruel!
You are just like me.
Why did it take me so long to see?
I was deafened by your sweet melody.

In the dark, where my heart will beat
Until I tell it to stop,
The only company I have
Is what we could have been, but never will be.

The two of us will never find love.
We’re just as equally broken, you and I.
And you can’t fix a broken window
With another one.

To me, what you did
An ancient feeling forbid.
You stole the one thing,
The one song I was afraid to sing.

What you did to me was
Against so many laws,
My own and yours,
Despite all the lost wars.

My field is now barren
With you, its baron.
Scorched earth hails your name.
I never expected to lose the game.

For fire was my witness,
I was alive and fearless.
Neither God nor glory
Would stop this story.

Some clock is always ticking,
Like my heart, constantly kicking.
Its own sound is hard to hear,
For it hasn’t an ear.

My walls are thin, trust me.
You will hear my plea.
For the one thing I can never get back,
My heart, which has gone cold, black.

They say shoot for the stars,
But what if I’m indoors?
I’ll just end up hitting the celling.

They say be yourself,
Then they want you to be happy.
What if you’re sad?

People want things they can’t see.
They’d trade in their sight
For a modest lie.

I doesn’t hurt me all that much anymore,
I’ve chewed glass before.
It always tastes the same, like blood.

Being alive is like writing poetry,
You can’t tear someone apart just because you don’t like them.
True poetry comes from honesty.

We need more of it, the truth.
No more masks or plays,
Just us, naked and bare.

If fate is fake then why did you happen to me?
If nothing is destined to happen
Then why do these poems still reach out
To you?

A ****** war was fought
For o so long.
Still my heart can’t stop singing
Its heavy battle songs.

You were the fire of my passion.
The fruit of my lust.
Now you are an echo,
Of a world, turned to dust.

Glass may shatter,
And the wind may blow.
But your heart will never measure up
To the discord in these rows.

The sorrow and horror of these verses
Help my mind go to sleep.
It’s sick and tired of my heart
Never leaving it be.

Rainy nights are my best friends,
Their drops remind me to blink.
The way they mask my tears gives me hope.
We were never meant to be…

Blow, white winds,
With echoes of the past.
While in your ice
Red-hot iron is cast.

Now the smith comes
Dressed in night’s shade,
Taking up the hammer
From the table on which it laid.

Strike after strike
The fire melts the ground,
Leaving a smell of familiarity
And a well-known sound.

Truth is this!
Like a branding iron
Cast into the
Cold winter ground.

The puppeteer can laugh
While he makes his marionette dance.
Little does he know
What it’s like to be strangled in his strings.

We search for meaning in this barren field,
Only to find a mirror pointing us back.
Life is searching for meaning
And not being happy with what you find.

I can count the years I spent in that storm.
I can remember every sleepless night.
I can recall every word which was exchanged.
What I can’t do is… let go.

Forgiveness is something foreign to me.
A refugee trying to inhabit my borders.
It’s my nation,
But it’d be inhumane not to let him in.

Maybe the day will come
When the Sun rises with the Stars
And the Moon brings the morning.
Maybe there will be a time when I can say your name,
Or look you in the eyes again.
Maybe…

I am a ******.
I force myself onto my poetry,
Even when it wants to be left alone.
I say no, to her no.

She’s the one who’s asking for it.
Walking all pretty, all alone,
Basically begging me to tear her clothes off.
I don’t need her permission.

After I do it, I cry.
I look myself in the mirror and wonder
Why do I do this, why?
I guess I’m just another monster.

The sad thing is
She always comes back for more.
She trusts me more than I do myself.
I don’t get why she does this to herself.

Til death and fire do us part,
No one will feel your broken heart.
An injustice of passion and cruelty,
Brought my body and my mind to mutiny.

Open your eyes
If they are still there.
Hear my last cries,
Your name, I must bear.
Tides of regret sweep over me.
The small things are what sets me free
From the chains of thy agony.
For we, my one and only, were birds of different feathers.

Fall into arms
Of lies and glass.
Do me no harms.
Your test I pass.
The corridors haunt my every thought.
Do you think of the pain you have brought,
And how your words brought my soul to rot?
It wasn’t your voice that broke the silence, it was the lack of it.

I sing and I write
Til my thoughts turn white.
And the fissure of true, blazing heat,
Has only you, who it has to meet.

What a good boy you’ve become.
Hide your feelings, let your heart go numb.
The fiery sprint,
Now a worthless stint.

You scream for the warden to set you free
While you, in your own hands, hold the key.
Your room becomes your prison.
Drown your soul, before it has risen!

Scrape the flesh of your ribs,
Reveal what lies beneath,
A cold heart with no care for life,
An empty bag, filled with blue blood.

In your eyes once shined a light
Now your thoughts fade to dark, a starless night.
Your screams pierce my ears.
They remind me of my own fears.

One day the sun will rise,
And with it, the meaning of breath.
Why we live and why we die
Has to be more than to say goodbye.

Make me a crown of silver and blood,
Before I drown in the shifting mud.
Now when my peace has broken into two,
I can still see you.

What would your hollow heart think of this?
Would your lips move in for a kiss?
Our would you stand your ground,
While I kneel, finally, a King, crowned.

This tragedy of success,
Anarchy and stress,
Culminated into one final act,
One final blow, an unavoidable impact.

My limbs are tensed, chained to the floor,
With my greatest enemy knocking on the door.
As soon as I break free, limitless power awaits.
I will rise, as the universe opens its gates!

Oh, I’m sorry.
You’ll have to forgive my uncultured mind.
I had no idea what being a man was.
Who would have guessed it was more than having something between your legs.

I guess I should go drink a cold one.
Or maybe fix a car.
Watch some sports?
Hit a woman?

That’s what all the real men do.
If you appreciate life and its wonders, you have to be a woman.
How many lives must society take before it crumbles on itself?
But men have it easy, right?

What if I want to cry?
No, I shouldn’t.
Mommy’s the one who cries when daddy beats her.
I guess I should just hit my wife too.

When I’m put into chains and you ask me why.
I’ll tell them, I thought mommy was supposed to cry.
Daddy would always leave her with a black eye.
It’s people like this that deserve to die.

Seep into me, my new Rose,
Be the one I actually chose.
Not some ill fate.
Come into me, before it’s too late.

The first time there was a concert in my chest,
Now there is nothing behind this lonely breast.
Where fire once burned with passion,
There now lied ashed ashen.

When I think of the red mist of night,
My mind tells me to either flee or fight.
I know love as not something to die for,
Instead she taught me that it is far worse than war.

How cruel is it for God to give me wings.
Amongst all the other petty things?
And still bind me to the Earth,
Avoiding my death, same as my birth.

Three times I fell,
Three times I broke into hell.
A fourth one there shall not be.
No more, will the night listen to my plea.

As heavy rains poured from the stars,
I swore that this world would be ours.
My lies were too well glazed.
You left my insides completely razed.

These lungs can’t hold any more water.
My blood boils, and it’s only getting hotter.
Ice can hold only so much,
My soul is also, such.

You never told me
That life would be
Like a boiled egg.
That I’d cry and beg.

Rather sooner than later
I chose the small over the greater.
If I could do it again,
I’d relive the pain.

Each fall I take.
Every morning I wake.
It feels like water through my soul.
Life is burning fast, and I am its coal.

Even though my life is a crowded room,
A flower yet to bloom.
The noise comes back as deafening silence,
Solitude and duty, and their unholy alliance.

Three trees burn in this forest.
A soldier’s choir and a lost artist.
The fog in this domain is too thick to breathe.
Ruby lips and pearl white teeth.

Every time I think of you
I bite my lip.
I can’t bear to see you
In any positive light.

Love and life.
One is nothing without the other.
I am so alive,
Yet I can’t love.

Loving has become a privilege to me.
A dark murky never-ending sea.
There’s no boat to help me cross.
The only way out… is to drown.

I once sat upon a hill.
She was the oncoming breeze,
So warm, so free.
And I was the windmill on top of the hill.

Whenever she blew past me
My gears would turn.
It was a rhythm capable of sustaining life.
But all I wanted was love.

I could go on for days, with her by my side.
We would dance together for hours.
Until I broke,
I couldn’t turn any longer.

She found it fit to abandon me.
It broke me.
Acid rain filled my lungs,
Until my breath reeked of disaster

I’m okay now,
And she is too.
My heart is healed, even though
The wind still gives me chills.

I can paint no sky,
Nor sing any melodies.
What I can do however,
Is create life, from where, there is none.

I offer you no timeless pieces,
Or ceiling paintings in grand chapels.
What I offer you is so much more,
Yet so little if you can’t feel.

I offer you entire worlds.
Oceans of words and
Mountains of thought.
Hills and fields of love,
An entire sky of hope.

Every cloud, grass and leaf
I’ve made for you.
All the rivers which flow and the rains which fall,
I’ve crafted with these two hands.

My work I give to you,
Motley, live and lush.
For you to read and to live through,
In any way you’d like.

Be careful however,
For my reality is vast,
But still is made out of yellow paper.
It burns easily,
And my heart is full of sparks ready to start a blaze.
Unlike any forest fire,
My love,
Will never,
Fade…

These new nights,
Overshadowed by lights,
Are plagued by my thoughts,
My memories hitting me like gunshots.

Wrapped in the heaven of sheet and cloth,
With the flapping of the most distant moth,
I lay, buried, safe.
Avoiding the mental strafe.

Come unto me, broken god,
Who my heart so often ****.
To new lengths and troubles,
Where dark thoughts come, in doubles.

To the sleeping fear from deep within,
I no longer fear your foul grin.
And to the monster with starts in her eyes,
Go forth, free, unchained from the skies.

My mind is off to where the rivers flow.
To where the Sun sets and the Moon rises.
That small space between sleep and waking up,
Where no dream seems unreal.

A minute in my head feels like a hundred.
My palace is vast
And every door is a thought,
It’s so easy to get lost sometimes.

Like smoke above the fire
My thoughts run thin.
They escape my cranial inferno
To live beside the Stars.

For that is where they belong,
Dancing on the silky night fabric
With white ants searching for meaning
Only to find, there is none.

Three is for how many times you broke my heart.
The damage had already been done, still my soul ached.
Only it never broke, it just bruised.

Two is for how many times I asked if you loved me.
Both times you said yes, you lied.

One is for how many girls I’ve ever loved.

I remember a time where
I’d wake up and, stop.
Just stop.
I’d stay in place not being able to move.

Your eyes would cut my legs clean off.
Medusa’s gaze shivers in comparison to yours.
But time has passed,
Things have changed.

I remember a time where
I’d dream about you,
Nonstop,
Every night.

I knew every part of you by heart.
You were the phantom which dwelled in my mind.
But time has passed,
Things have changed.

I remember a time where
I loved you.
So much
It burned.

You wrecked me,
Your infernal tornado blazed through my insides.
But time has passed,
Things have changed.

So have you,
And so have I.

My heart has been sunk.
And I have drowned.
In this broken world,
Love is no longer a privilege,
It is a chore...

Blood and bone be my witness,
The heart is struck with great an illness.
Waste, is her name.
The time of day would go away just as it came.

Seeing the hours tick
And hearing my watch’s click,
Would give me more reason
To accuse my mind of high treason.

Its only duty is to obey me,
And yet my ideas drift, as though they were on sea.
Strange is this mind.
Too often cruel, rather than kind.

It happened last night.
It was brighter than bright.
On the stage with so many others,
Smiles, awes and wonders.

In that chaos of positivity,
That mess of creativity,
And studious productivity,
Lied my own proclivity.

Surrounded by twenty or more people
Still in my heart lingered something evil, lethal.
It was when I saw the two of them, together,
That I knew, my love is not real, it lies in the nether.

Again, in that room of twenty or more,
I found myself in front of a locked door.
In my mind I heard the words you once swore
And the fragile peace inside me, once again, turned into war.

I’ve started to hate those eyes of yours,
And how they see through me.
Even after all these years,
I don’t even know if it’s five, four or three.

My night rest is haunted by your laugh,
The bed in which I sleep is no longer safe.
Meeting you has cut my life in half.
You left me to die, now I am a waif.

I live just a street away,
Yet you were never reachable.
How can your heart be so gray,
And act completely unimpeachable?

Through the years I’ve been on this Earth,
I have learned one thing.
Love is a birth, but what is it worth?
Love is a throne for only one King…

Dog.
There hasn’t been and never will be anyone like you.
You always seemed so broken, a glassless mirror.
No matter how odd, I still looked into you.

Where you saw tragedy, I saw potential.
Where there was pain, I saw gain.
Words do you little justice,
For what we did, cannot be spoken.

It is true that my lines were too fierce,
That your mind was not oiled enough.
However the joy of inadequacy made it, unique
Or so we thought.

Nights came and went, with your screams at my doorstep.
The illusion of peace was no more, an echo.
You hid and you hit where you could,
This proved to do little good.

If you see me now,
Would you thank or attack me?
I must ask you how,
How were you able to set yourself free?