Aaron LA Lux Oct 6

Into The Night

Lost in a pattern of thoughts,
as these experiences continue to shape our realities,
fell in love gave my heart away,
and watched it disappear with her into the night,

too much heartbreak,
too much more,
too much greed and lust,
too much wanting too much more,

is that even correct English,
does it even matter,
it seems I’m frozen in a moment,
but the words just continue faster and faster,

fck you,
fck me,
I mean,
that in the most loving way,

we’re all fckt up,
the plan is no more,
we’re lost in a position of indecision,
where there is no either or,

lost in a pattern of thoughts,
as these experiences continue to shape our realities,
fell in love gave my heart away,
and watched it disappear with her into the night…

∆ Aaron LA Lux ∆

Alexia Noel Oct 2

How can I explain to you,
That the numbness isn't a lack of all emotion.
It's all the emotions crushed into my tiny heart.
It's bursting at the seems and I'm so overwhelmed
That I don't want any of it any more.
That's what the numbness is.

ar Sep 16

I can't seem
to wrap my head
around the fact,
that we take medicine
every time the pain
comes back

but before we notice
our pain worsen,
we've already
taken too much.

way too much, i'm feeling dizzy.
Ravanna Dee Feb 11

Often times, it's the person sitting right in front of you.
Smiling and laughing and cracking jokes.
The one that's always the first to ask how you're really feeling.
The one who will sit with you in silence,
Or let you scream to them your frustrations.
The one who will give you a shoulder, an ear, a hug, anytime you need it.
The one who is always there, and never judging.
People don't often see their pain, because they've become so good at hiding it.
So they keep smiling too big,
and laughing too long,
and letting people soak their shoulders with their salty tears.
Because, unfortunately,
Depression targets the ones that feel too much,
until they feel nothing.

It’s too much
Too much to think
To write
To dive
Not yet
I’m not ready
To dive
To think
I wasn’t then and I’m not now

I cry harder and harder and harder thinking that each tear
Will rid my brain of these memories 

Drain them
Erase them
Piece by piece
It’s too much
To dive
To start again
This endless cycle
This damn endless cycle
Take them all away dear God I scream
It’s too hard to think
To feel
To think
To dive
To feel
To reminisce

The only thing my body can do is tire itself by trying to release a pain that my heart
My heart
My tired heart will always hold onto

You are an open wound in my soul that will never heal

Each thought of you spills more alcohol into the depths of this gash

You are the lesson I learned
The one that stuck 

Dear God I scream
Dear God let me not have a daughter
I could not bear to watch her die and dive and fall and crash
Slowly and all at once thinking it’s fate and love and heaven and hope 
And everything and anything in between

Dear god I’m too tired
Too broken
I’ve lost my voice
Screaming
Breaking

You haunt my heart
My mind, heart, and soul
Because you will always be the one who broke me.
----

Amanda May 4

I'm exhausted from running,
Away from every stalking fear,
I'm so busy avoiding chances,
I don't have time to stop and see clear,

And although I don't know why,
I'm scared of what we'll become,
I'm scrambling to keep my distance
but what is there to run away from?

Even with reassurances,
and promises that you won't leave,
I just can't bring myself to give in;
Its just too risky to believe.

I trust you with all of my heart,
and every piece of my soul,
but for some unknown reason,
My heart isnt willing to lose control.

Maybe because ive been hurt before,
and im not eager to relive,
The endless days that would ensue,
Or the damage you could give.

I would love to surrender,
To everything you make me feel,
but without a guarantee,
How can I be sure it's real?

The familiar need is coming back,
I'm addicted to your touch,
Which wouldnt be a problem if,
I didnt already care too much.

Too

Sometimes I feel a little too happy
A little too intense
For no particular reason at all
And it scares me
Because I feel like I might explode
That the blood pumping through my heart is building pressure
And I know it is unsustainable
I know that I am burning a little too bright
And I am scared that the world will catch on fire
Or that something will happen to extinguish my light

bryn Apr 19

drip
drip
drip
red
too much.
too much blood.

help me

fingers tapping against your thigh, music note mumblings. subtract everyone else and watch the feeling
m
  u
     l
       t
         i
           p
              l
                y
disassemble and reassemble the ensemble and allocate your earnings as earnestly as you can without appearing overeager. overhearing a conspiracy between my lips and your neck. a secret isn't a secret unless you whisper it, so do it, make sure the russians don't hear us as they rush off to give reports on that look I just gave you, the one that is oh so telling. reveling in it. living in the revelation of your skin, pouring down your presence like honey, like sweet molasses dripping thick and sweet, simmering under the sun, glimmering in the water like a jewel, jealous and tart, painful and dark and dazzling. beating only in anatomical hearts, out of tune, cacophony and cruel crimson, missing someone not something, left wanting and waning in the light of a lopsided moon, farsighted and fingers that prune in purple light rippling across the walls, willing to travel the planes of your body, embodied travesty traversing the sahara, dunes doomed to be swept away by the wind, breaking and kept away, each grain unable to touch one another more than once, gorgeous enough to be pain, staking your claim on misery before the misers bury it in their own backyards, backwards discovery, a convenient amnesia, believing ruses and runes to decipher in delicate dictum like tricking a language into translating itself.

almost too much of not enough.

a mess of too much alliteration and slanted, misplaced rhyme. frantic, but i kinda like it that way
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