darkness in my heart
flashing lights in my brain
the rise and fall
of your breathing
as you sleep next to me
i can imagine it perfectly
soothing my rapid breath
the warmth
of your chest
as your arms are wrapped around me
i can feel it on my skin
like it's real
casting my anxiety
far from here
thinking of your body
hands exploring
comfort in a familiar place
relieves the burning sensation
on my fingertips
lips on mine
pressing softly
petal soft
my favorite kind of dream
chases away
all my nightmares
hands in my hair
twisting my tresses
braiding with ribbons
calms my buzzing nerves
walking barefoot
in clear water
hand in mine
pacifies the static behind my eyes

i'm sorry for being human

i'm sorry for loving you

i should have known it was a mistake

*******

he had a galaxy
in his mind
and it showed
through his eyes
it spilled
from his lips
stars
at his fingertips
planets in his pockets
moon drops in his pen
he drew what he knew
again and again

They all
...
Love you
...
In some way

So I guess I'm not special

when i think of you
words spill out my brain
when i'm with you
they all disappear
when i talk
i have to make sure
that they don't spill out of my mouth

i will bathe you
in my starlight
like the stars
bathe the soil

Dew drops
Whispering to starlight
Secrets
Never told
A  small girl
With hair like fire
By a lake
With water like the night sky
Emerald frogs
Ruby roses
Crystal violets
And a pearl moon
All of this
Could be hers
But she just wants
To make friends with the fireflies

starry eyes
i love you too much
but it's still not enough
I want
want
want
need
you.
starry eyed
even though it's not night
willing to beg
darling I'll plead
just one taste will never be enough for me

Stay away from him
I’m not afraid of sin
Take him from me,
I’ll take your life
Watch out for me
I’m sharpening my knife
He doesn’t belong to you
So let him go
You should be afraid
Of being alone
The idea of your blood
Spattered on the wall
Excites me
No breath left at all
The water turned red
Another one dead
Watch your back
Not for him
You should have obeyed
Now you’ll feel my blade

you crossed my heart
now i hope to die

she was thinking again
about the seams in her legs
the stitches
and weeping.
it terrified her
the blood gushing out
torn skin
the flavor of pain
her eyes were locked open
and she stared at the seams
tears pouring from her sewed-open eyes
she sits on her pile of ashes
her blood mixing
making a muddy paste
that crusts on her eyelashes
her bruised cuts growing on her flesh
opening
and reopening
maggots gnawing on her body
eating the remnants of flesh
and she stares.

My eyes
Politely ask for sleep
It pains me
But I must decline
I have things to do
Places to be
But I also would like
To stop and dream

Stupid
You're old enough now
You should know better
Don't even
Don't you dare
Don't you cry
****
It's spilling
Its
S  p
i    l    l
i      n      g
Out
You ******* crybaby
STOP
Now everyone's worried
Well not everyone
He's not worried
He hasn't even noticed
He just walked by
*******
Crying even harder?
You wimp
S H U T  U P
I don't know why I'm crying okay?
Yes, you do
I don't
Liar
He's leaving
And he didn't even notice you
Wow
That's right
You're too old for this
It's not like you're special
Nearly every one has that black hole inside of them now
Fill it with food
Or material things
Or strangers
But it won't work
You think that there's someone out there for you?
Someone who will fill you?
Make you better
Stupid *****
No one will do that for you
So ******* grow up
and stop crying

Stop crying

Take a sip
Strawberry syrup
Sweet and soft
But never enough
Strawberry sweetness
Smooth in your mouth
Tangy but not sour
Covering the dollhouse
Strawberry syrup
Dripping from your lips
Red
On your fingertips
Staining the lace
On your pretty white dress
Strawberry syrup
Making a mess
Can’t see through the syrupy haze
Covering my eyes in a strawberry glaze

Do it
Cut the string
And it
Ruin me
Sever your ties
**** it
Slice at my heartstrings
Destroy my dreams
Massacre the thread
So that you can't put it back together
Make me cry
Want to d i e
That's what you want, isn't it
To ruin me

my eyes are tired
wish i could sleep
smells of coffee
and cologne that's cheap
the clicking of nails
on the slick wood table
everything i do
is so unstable
a sound from my stomach
i'm really hungry
looking in the mirror
the reflection's ugly

taste of you like sugar clouds
your voice in my head, so loud
tracing little circles on my legs
i know i'm not the only one who begs
i wanna draw all over your skin again
make you laugh, sounds like heaven
taste of you like warm cotton candy
see you at the beach, shirtless and sandy
laughter echoes within my bones
how lovely you are,
your heart is my home
love you so, that crooked grin
everyone think of you
i just want to let you in
taste of to like soft candy petals
traces of your heart
scorched on metal
I'd like to sit with you
on those sugar clouds
legs dangle off
our voices loud

i saw you
at sunset
while the sky
went dim
it made
me smile
happiness
to the brim
something about you
that makes me feel right
i'll be thinking about you
for the rest of night
i love the rare
sunset talks we have
while the sun goes down
and we smile and laugh
the sky is pink
orange and blue
i love it when
im next to you

i suppose
that supposing
is assuming
to presume
an estimation.

all the sugar in the world
couldn't make you sweeter

Sweet
Little
******
Boy
Let me wipe your face
Stand up
And smile
Your pretty smile of grace
Sweet
Little
******
Boy
You will be alright
I will hold you closely
And tell you in stories at night
Sweet
Little
******
Boy
I promise I will love you
And I swear
On my life
I won't let anyone touch you

You are the morning light
Streaming through the gauzy curtains that dress my window
Striping my skin in ribbons of sunshine
I am the canvas of your dawn.
You are the cool flame that shoots across the sky
Every night that my thoughts settle upon your sweet face
Brilliantly throwing itself through the darkness of late evening
I am the one who wishes for you.
You are the craters in the moon
Imperfect and untouched
Leaving identical impactions on my heart
I search for your face in the glow of her own.
You are the fervent blazing of the sun
Radiating love that scorches the flesh
Shining down on me like beams of genuine joy
I am infinitely grateful for your eternal reverberation of tenderness.

Taffeta watches the pigs atop the tables
Glass eyes and stitches where they're enabled
Guts pumping crimson liquid
Sewing 'em up, she's addicted
Family and friends recommend she withdraw
She responded with a twinkle in her eye and a dropped jaw
Scissors and string, that's all she'll need
Besides a corpse, of course, and a bit of stuffing
Lilac eyes affixed on a tattered pillow
Enjoying watching a weeping Willow
Her poor Porky pet has met his end
But everyone knows you can depend
Before your sweet pet starts to smell
On Taffeta's Taxidermy to stuff 'em well

i hide
in this tasteless existence
i am hushed
when i try
to speak
my words
get caught
in my throat
and i choke
on my tears
it hurts
to breathe
it hurts
to speak
this life
isn't living

******* blood
tell me if it's sweet

are you the person
i've been waiting to meet

would you like to see my blade
darling, it's okay if you're insane

i love the way you play the game
i know you're not afraid of shame

******* flesh
tell me if it's warm

they're afraid of just one
they should see the swarm

i love the taste of chaos.
the smell of gasoline.

it's pathetic that they're scared of me.
darling, i'm not mean.

there's something in the air.
i can feel it in my lungs.

i don't mind if you scream,
i always do it in tongues.

******* blood
tell me if it's sweet.

you're the flavor of the person
i've been waiting to meet

she wore hightops
and a tattered
old book bag.
and she liked
to tie
her red converse
to it's straps.
and walk
across
the fire escape.

the metal
beneath
her socked feet
was cool
and x-ed
and black.

she ran,
and she laughed
or she ran
and she cried
but she ran
and she ran
for it was all
she could do.

you tease me
with those sweet words
i never know
if they mean something
or if they're just there
to keep me distracted
you look at me
with this strange look in your eyes
is it love
or disgust
or curiosity

To tell the truth
Living was a curse
I always thought
It couldn’t get worse
But then laid my eyes
On the most beautiful thing
Had know idea
What he would bring
He brought color and flowers
And fireflies and stars
And suddenly I wished
For a world that was ours
Saw him when I closed my eyes
And every time, I smiled
I grew up too fast
But I could finally be a child
I could safely fall in love
Without being afraid
Something I could touch
Without being afraid
I can breathe in sweet air
Without having to hold it in
I don’t have to feel
Like I don’t belong in my skin
When I finally realized
I had all I needed
It came to me
When I thought of what we did
All those days
We spent together
Tied me up
And I was tethered
To you

The boy he loves is beautiful
With pretty brown eyes
And long soft eyelashes
The boy he loves has a bright sparkly smile
He's tall and strong and has soft caramel hair
The boy he loves is funny and loved
The girl I am is boring
With basic green-blue eyes
and lashes short and average
The girl I am has a stupid cheesy smile
She's scared and weak and has boring ***** blonde hair
The girl I am is not-enough and lonely.
The boy I love doesn't love me
Though my love for him is bigger than the sea

The Crow's pitch wings
Glide through darkness
Cutting through fog
Like each feather is a blade
Slicing the air
As if slicing my skin
His eyes red
Infused with the dripping from my veins
He soars above a paint-chipped steeple
Perching on an ebony cross
He observes the soil below him
Gaze landing on a single figure
The Crow keeps in his sight
A bleeding body
Staggering towards the final resting place
Who could it be, on this heavy night
But the troubled soul of a human
Toppling down onto a crumbling grave
A life soon to be taken
To ascend to the moon above behind him
A being
Breathing
Breathing
Breathless

someplace
inside
covered in vines
and wildflowers
lays the best part of me
with thoughts of you
floating around like clouds
a heart-shaped hole
contains my memories
of when i was happy
of whispers
sang to the stars
and secrets
sang to the moon
of fireflies
in my hands
and sunlight
on my skin
of stretches
in the morning
with anticipation
of seeing you
that what's hidden
in the deepest part of me
if you look
hard enough
you'll see a smile
and a hand
that held
by an angel
by the name of
You
and if you try
you'll find
innocence
and
happiness

The eyes of time
Stare at my heart
Healing
And ripping
Over
And over
Again.
The song let me mend
Lies like
"Love is just around the bend"
And it's only a lie I tell myself
The eyes of time
Tick
And rip
The stitches from my heart

i think that
without our shadows
we wouldn't know what we'd be like
with nothing but darkness inside of us

I would like to see you
Before the world ends
We would walk in the ashes
Around the twists and bends
Kisses stolen under the flickering stars
The little that's left will always be ours
Gallons of spray paint
In stolen bookbags
Making our mark
With words to be said
It's not like it matters
No one else will see
The art that we've made
The stars, you, and me
Anything we want
Tangled in the rubble
Finding meadows of grass
Blowing effervescent bubbles
Our lovely dystopia
With creatures that survived
Songs to be sung
And stars to be hung
The word hopeless
Not meant to last
But you and I,
We'll be the last

There was a little boy who lived in the clouds.
He would come to me and say “Please don’t be so loud.”
But at night he would come to me,
And tell me a story or two.
About his adventures in the sky.
And about the clouds when he flew.
About when he dipped his hands in the ocean blue.
And about when he got into trouble, too.
He would tell them to me, until I would sleep.
And in my heart, forever I will keep.
One day the little boy said farewell to me.
And waiting forever, I shall be.

I wait eagerly for you to return
Though I know your presence is temporary
I still swallow up every morsel of attention I can get
And though I have a fear of needles
I shoot each bit of love you can muster for me into my veins
I beg you silently to stay
With actions I'd never think would exist within me
Each time you go, it's unexpected
And each time, I tremble in your absence
I crave the high you set me on
The feeling of being adored
Of being worth something
Anything

I used to be happy
Laughing next to you
I was smiling
Just thinking about you
But now
I can't breath
My eyes
are dull
Maybe
You've changed
Or it's just me
But I can tell
that there's something
You don't care anymore
Have I done something wrong?
You were gone
And you didn't come back the same

As crystal clear tears rolled down her cheeks,
The stars glimmered and shined in her presence.
The flowers bloomed for she was their sunlight.
She lay silent, waiting for the sun to rise, so the warmth would dry her tears.
But it never came.
For she was the sun of the wilderness around her.
So it was forever nightfall.
The girl continued to cry.
Her tears made more stars.
Her quiet sobs were the essence of the flowers and trees.
The animals tried to comfort her, but she wouldn’t let them, for when she did, the animals would burn, for she was the sun.
The girl was a girl, but she was also a caretaker, a mother, and a sun to the woods.
And she cried and cried.
For she was the sun.

You pulled the trigger
I held the gun
Watching then fall
Is so much fun
Bodies dropping
One by one
You pulled the trigger
I held the gun
Darling can't you
Taste the blood
All these bullets
Just one is enough

The wind is lonely.
Every day he searches for someone to love, or to just talk to.
He searches high and low, with no progress.
He writes poems to the sky, but she is too beautiful and vain, while he is invisible and nothing,
He sings to the ground, but she is too harsh and cold.
The wind is lonely, In a way that no one understands.
But I do.
And when I die, my soul will go to be with the wind.
I will comfort the wind until neither of us is alone.
And I will help him bring warm breezes to the earth, so no one is lonely.

This sort of dream
Is classified with an interpretation of heaven
The one with you
Holding my hands
And looking me in the eyes
Lips close enough to touch
I wish I could have your love
This kind of night
Could be classified with where true love begins
With fireflies
And moon reflections in your eyes
Skin soaking in the moonlight
Dancing until sunrise
Dandelions dreams
And unstitching seams
I wish I could breathe you in
This sort of magic
Could be classified with
The way you look at me
The sun lighting the clouds
Speaking out loud
Hands around my waist
Obsessed with the way you taste
I really wish this was real

even wilted roses have thorns

im tired
from a lack of sleep
im tired
from a lack of love
im tired
from missing you
im tired
from not eating
im tired
from being so tired

I'm
Tired
Of
B
R
E
A
T
H
I
N
G

Tired of

S
E
   E
    I
     N
       G

This hatred in humanity
And
The
Delicates
Being

T    O     R    N

Apart
So quickly
Without listening
To their glistening
Fragile
Beautiful words

Poem

i have so many words to say about you
but i dont know how to put them all together

i want to hurt you
but i want you back
i want to **** you
but i need you in my life

i want to watch you burn
have a heart attack
but i want to hold you
want to be your wife

i'm really mad
but i really love you, too
i'm really sad
and i miss you

She had the breath of a raging storm
Quick, forceful, and cloudy
Running through frosted fields
Icy grass, sparkling and trampled
Running from her fears, worries, and responsibilities
The red canvas of her shoes bled darker with melting ice
Her bare skin was on fire, covered in burning needles
Running towards the breath of dawn
Only to meet the silence of the moon
Placed in an open, endless sky