Woke up this morning,
looked a right fright.
One eye on my forehead,
the other lay squinting,
on the pillow on my bed.

Chin on my right breast,
tongue on my left.
I looked like I'd had
a ******* cardiac arrest.

Kaydee.

Then,
with dice in our pockets
and places to see.
Hope in our hearts,
a bright future forsee.

Rock paper scissors,
agreement was made.
We'd ride on the bus
to play games in arcade.

In the ponds and the bogs,
There were tadpoles and frogs.
By the bushes and thicket,
we'd play football or cricket.

With time on our hands,
like a slowing of sands.
A keeper we'd pick
with a showing of hands.

Playing until too dark to see,
only then would we return
for tea.

Now,
With mercury fillings
and gaps in our teeth.
Saving what money
to spend on a wreath.

Kaydee.

Wear your muzzle
and do not protest!
Attendance with others
will end in arrest.
So, keep your mouth shut
and toe our line,
Failure to do so will end
in a fine.

Your freedom is gone
for you're just a pawn.
In this game we play,
human rights are withdrawn.

Predictively programmed
your mind now is ours.
You entered a ballot,
relinquished your powers.

When all said and done
this is your own fault.
Industrial complex,
I dare you revolt.

Kaydee.

I caught a glimpse,
a butterfly net.
Your beauty destroyed
placard beauty, beset.
Flayed wings and
long body at rest,
all to see.
Why can't they
just leave you to
flutter,
to
be.

Kaydee.

Where is it that you find your wonder?
'neath the rainclouds with pitchfork
collecting lightning,
in thunder?
******* is king,
Ecstasy queen.
Phet is my thing
with morning caffeine.
Six days and five nights,
the things that I've seen.
The rabbits and spiders
in the *** noodle canteen.

Where is it that you find your wonder?
'neath the sun with secateurs
collecting the fruits
of agriculture.
Health is king,
love is queen.
In this new life,
sober this spring.

Poetry by Kaydee.

Nothing lost is something won
in that awkward moment
between birth and death.

Kaydee

A vanta black with specks of white.
The darkest night, embedded light.
The finest flicks, raised painted grain.
Diagonal lines, depicting rain.

The only colour of sodium light,
all placed on sticks and stood upright.
They line the street and evenly placed.
The coldest night, a bitter taste.

Upon the path, a man and dog.
Both brisk in pace and breath of fog.
Icicles drip from frozen eaves.
Returning home, both kicking leaves.

Kaydee.

Ashes to ashes
dust to . . .
Sorry,
I didn't hear you scratching
but
I did hear your voice.

I looked into your eyes.
Nothing.
I tried your pulse.
Nothing.
There was no heartbeat.
Nothing,
but I did hear your voice.

I love you too.
Rest in peace.

Poetry by Kaydee.

I still believe my eyes.
All I see
is my blindness.
I still believe my ears.
All I hear
are lies.
Yet I still quell the urge to fly.
And if you'd achieved,
after all you believed.
I'd be dead.

Yes,
yes I hear the pipes.
Stay with me.
Hold my hand.
Shhh, I hear your hush
Shhh, I hear your hush.
I'm not ready,
I'm not ready, too.
They're calling me.
They're calling me, from you.
I know,
I know it's time to go.

Goodbye.

The pipes began to pipe some more.
Baby don't rush,
baby don't rush.
Darling take some time, some more.
Please
hear my hush,
hear my hush.
I'm not ready no more,
not ready, no.
Only when you hear them sing
you'll know.
Baby you'll know,
you'll know it's time to go. . .
. . to go.

Goodbye.

Her saturate beauty
in violet black light.
The narcotic consent
some Saturday plight.
Colours are bleeding
a vivid dream night.
Lysergic Acid Diethylamide,
Right?

A sleep pattern paisley
purple and green.
Faceless adversaries
heard, yet unseen.
A motionless panic,
unable to run.
Contorted, curled fingers,
now, isn't this fun.

A florist stands guard at the overgrown garden of broken stone teeth.
  Where a million flakes of silver and white covers neatly laid out boxes of bones.
  Small, separated audiences quietly chatting to themselves, unaware that no one can hear.
  Where their cold grey words drip from frozen blue lips on a falling mist of old sorrow.
  The trees once in full bloom appear dead, reflecting all life around.
  Where the butterflies and ladybirds used to play, just as the bones in the boxes did yesterday.
Those in attendance file out one by one. They peer left and then right, realising the flower lady has gone.
And it's on their way home as the time ticks on by, the realisation that
one day,
they too,
must die.

Poetry by Kaydee.

Take a pop,
Sling a shot,
Marble in a hole.
These are games
we used to play.
All strikers
scoring goals.

Now we're all
just goalkeepers
trying to save it all.
Hold on to things
we never had
without dropping
the ball.

Poetry by Kaydee.

Upon finding
I am burdened
with this
glorious purpose
came the stark
realisation
that I must
one day
triumph or fail
and with that,
I awoke.

Kaydee.

After I am gone,
I might just stay.
Not for long but for
a short while anyway.

I'll see you in the daytime
and call your name at night.
Switching on the t.v,
turning off the light.

The temperature drops
and it is getting colder.
I'll breathe into your ear
whilst touching your shoulder.

"It's me, I'm still here"
"Yes, you heard me right"
I'll sit on your bed and
watch you all night.

Now you know it's me,
It's time for me to go.
I never ever left you.
I wanted you to know

Poetry by Kaydee

The trees and the river
where we loved to go.
With tents and dried kindling,
the fire, its glow.

Make swings in the trees
with mud on our knees.
Completing scout tasks
and the badges we'd sew.
Make rafts that we'd sail
and the scout songs, regail.

We'd follow the river
to see it unfold.
Now none of us go there
now that we're old.

Poetry by Kaydee

Stay on point,
remain on path.
A childhood thought,
a fiery wrath.
Safe and sound
now all is well.
Do not recall
your childhood hell.
The bedroom door,
that creeping light.
Remain tight lipped,
too young to fight.
When Mum goes out
stay quiet, I'd say.
Don't make a noise,
he'll go away.
Face buried deep,
the pillows cloak.
You got away,
your brother's broke.
He struck again,
too late to cry.
We couldn't tell,
he'd only lie.

Kaydee.

"I'm not hungry" she said.
"Let's both get undressed
and go straight to bed".
Her eyes peer down,
I've read that look.
She's hungry only
that we ****.
Both twisted, posed,
improbable feats.
Entangled, stuck in
satin sheets.
Back arched from touch,
sensual caress.
Opening of *****,
a fingers press.
A wanting tongue,
it reads her look.
A throbbing gland,
throes north and stuck.
Perspiring writhe,
one, two, we slide.
Enchanted throws,
"oh God" she cried.
Seismic shudders,
twisted face.
One final cry,
a tired embrace.

Poetry by Kaydee.

Blessed are the fools
who remember read ink.
Fooled are the blessed
who critically think.

Kaydee.

At Prophets gate
in front of a jury.
Cannot be judged when
we have the same story.

Defined by our actions
yet separated by thought.
The battle lines drawn
based on **** we were taught.

The matrix created,
money to be made.
Dependent on memory,
reflected in grade.

Well how did you do
with the lessons you had?
Did you repeat the mistakes
of your Mum and your Dad?

So who is at fault?
We're all pawns in a game,
consuming their poison
for fortune and fame.

and now that it's over,
here is your prize!
That's right,
you get **** all
'cause everyone dies.

Poetry by Kaydee.

Looks like we didn't make it,
I always thought we would.
Now the end is nearing
and it is getting late,
I never knew until today
your love would turn to hate.

I know that people change
and no one more than I.
I really didn't realise
you wished that
I would die.

by Kaydee
late in the day.

My twin the mirror,
she looks just like me
Correcting mistakes,
I'll one day be free.

With words from my head
relayed with my tongue.
I write my own words,
I'll sing my own song.

Take the pieces that remain,
I'm leaving them to you.
Use them wisely,
learn the game.
You're now on level two.

You cannot change
what others do.
So what will be, will be.
Remember this.
It won't be long.
You're now on level three.

No need for riches,
don't care you're poor.
Quit the race,
you need no more.
You're now on level four.

Organically dying,
body is old.
Your spirit is flying,
you feel alive.
You're now on level five.

You won't change me
to suit your views.
It cannot be,
you'll always lose.

Your thoughts,
your chants.
For redefining,
I'll still repel
when I'm flat lining.

Dress the bones with flesh
and cover them in skin.
Name this doll,
this mannequin.
This meat case
I live in.

Kaydee

It seemed automatic,
the things that you'd do.
I never expected.
Not this,
not from you!

Now that you've done it,
how do you feel?
I never thought that I'd say it,
but yeah.
It felt real!

Poetry by Kaydee

It's not a competition,
It feels like its a game.
The paths we are all walking,
I believe are all the same.

I'm sure you'll get there sooner,
and this is how it feels.
That's because I do insist
I walk my path in heels.

Kaydee.

D                 is for dying
      i got tired of trying.
U                 is for upset
         but I couldn't cry.
S            is for sleeping
      in darkness i trust.
T          for triumphant
        now that i'm dust.

For all we know
we'll meet again.
The in between,
not now or then.
If I go first
I'll wait for you.
Your guiding light
to see you through.
I'll hold your hand
when you are sad.
I'll cry for you
throughout the bad.
I love you now
like I loved you then.
I'll still love you
when we meet again.

Poetry by Kaydee.

We play with creepy things
to quell the fear inside us.
Disguised in life it brings,
the woodlice and the spiders.
...
The mud pies and the worms
all made in preparation.
With life's persistent germs
a stronger generation.
...
And because what we consume
eventually makes us stronger.
The mud pies and the worms
will make us all live longer.

Poetry by Kaydee.

Then comes the danger,
pretends it's a friend.
Infamous liars,
ultimate desires.
Intoxication
and the ******' rest.

Hours and hours
to be the best.
A balance to be re-dressed.
The best ******' dancer,
******' chancer.
Don't get ****** . .
. in
sin
sin
Good luck!

Kaydee.

You couldn't reveal,
you wouldn't say.
This Mask I wore,
It weighed me down.
You didn't care,
It wasn't fair.
I held my breath,
You didn't say.

and now, . . .

I watered down your poison.
You cannot hold me now.
My arms held out,
waiting.

Nothing.
You'll run.
I know you'll run.
oh,
ok kid.

#Poetrybykaydee

If you know me.
I write from many a different mind.
Yes, they're all mine
You cannot quell my thoughts.
I refuse.
No, I absolutely ******' refuse.
You cannot **** what's in my head.
I'll do that myself.
When I am dead.

Kaydee

I'm a future without brakes.
It's the only way to stop the pain
and my heart, the way it aches.
Red lights can't stop me now.

I'm nearly there.
I'm on the brink
of something great.
This time's my time
to celebrate.

Would we halve the pain
if we shared it?
Or even better,
be spared it
'cause I'd give
you my rose
if
you
did.
x

Poetry by Kaydee

With leather clad hands
and old plastic sheets
he makes up the reasons
for the people he meets.

They'll feel nothing's wrong
for he sings a sweet song
where false promises are made
with a smile from a blade.

And on a cold knife night
he'll extinguish their light
as they struggle for air,
for their pain
is longer than
the chair.

To die is to understand
the cards you were dealt
and the cards in your hand.

You may question the journey
all the way through,
no matter the trauma

What makes you
IS YOU.

Forty seven coloured leaves
have fallen from the tree.
Some were green,
some are gold,
each one of them is me.

She knew where she was going,
she knew where she had been
and all that time
when she was young,
she knew she was still green.

Add all the springs
and all the falls,
the winters that have past.
This leaf of gold is 47
and she is ageing fast.

Kaydee.

He was warm
and shone bright like a son.
She was cold like a moon
and he knew he had to die that night
to make way for her.

Without regret.

Kaydee.

Angels with torches lighting my way
down grand, windowed hallways
I'll walk down one day.
With framed, pictured memories
highlighting my past.
Flickering candles,
a shadow I cast.
All the while,
wondering why I am here.
This is the story of my yesteryear.
I suddenly realise that this is the end.
A man holds his hand out
and says
"Welcome my friend"

Poetry by Kaydee.

In life,
not all is as it seems

said me . . ,
. . . . to me

whilst chatting in a dream.

Poetry by Kaydee.

Memories of
sepia toned photo's
of a world once lived in.
Baggy shorts and huge shirts
of football games I once played in.

Are memories, just that.
In a playground once played in.

Though things have changed
some things remained,
like
the body I still live in.

Poetry by Kaydee.

Can't sleep for thinkin'
Can't wake for drinkin'
this place that I live in
to expensive to be in.

I tried just a taste
but that wasn't enough.
If I don't stop it now
I'll be back livin' rough.

Over populated streets at night.
For a doorway to sleep in
I'll have to fight and
hide under a blanket
until it gets light.

and repeat verse 3

Kaydee.

I forgot how to cry.
Like the porcelain doll
in a white summer dress.
But just like it, I couldn't care less

Nor could I care more,
It was just too much.

My once teary eyes were useless.
My mind was blind.
Until I learned to love a little deeper.

I would never find, . . .
. . . me.

Poetry by Kaydee.

In my mind I have a hive
where a million bees live and thrive.
The killer bees have left, they've gone
I have no need, what's done is done.

The honey bees, that now I keep
so sickly sweet, they let me sleep.
The bees and I now live as one,
they'll follow me when I am gone.

Each one of them and from above
a little sting, from me with love.
So sickly sweet into your mind,
memories of me are all you'll find.

So every day that you live on,
equal days that I am gone.
See, suddenly it all made sense,
A life of pain,
your recompense.

Poetry by Kaydee

When we first met you re-lit the flame inside my heart.
You gave me a need to survive and I never thought we'd part.
But this world is too ugly for me
to bear
and I don't want you to think that I didn't care.
So I wrote you this poem to explain to you why.
It wasn't anything you did and I don't want you to cry.
I'm sure you'll find a new home to stay where they'll give you your
food and a place to play.
Finally, try not to **** too many birds or you and I will be having words.
I'll be watching you from in the skies and every time it rains, that'll be the tears falling from my eyes.

Love from Mummy.

Poetry by Kaydee.

Sorry I couldn't wrap it,
it's still warm and wet.
I thought you should have it
in case you ever forget.

Kaydee.

What colour my eyes,
you'll see right through.
Into my mind,
I'm showing you.

Angels of mine
have all absconded.
The ballots are in
and all are counted.

A landslide shows
only demons have voted.
So words of hurt
have been promoted.

Poetry by Kaydee.