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Nov 2017 · 272
Coocku bird
Building wings of wax all because you know not the beauty of your own plumage.
Dazzled by peacocks jealous of their colors when you soar like an inky raven
Oct 2017 · 405
Indras chambers Haiku
Slick, Drip, damp,drop, moist.
Thunder jealous of your groans
Lightning, of my strikes.
It’s about ***,not storm gods
Oct 2017 · 270
Imitation
I once heard that art is most beautiful when imitateing life . I never understood this; imitation infers a falsehood, a lack of authenticity. Art can only be what it is, unapologetically,It can’t build a facade.
I ,the one who is deemed alive, lie habitually to those around me and worse my self.
I am a performer playing the part of least resistance and greatness propitiation. Solitarily contemplating a collective I want to both develop beyond the horizon or envelop in the flames of a star.
conundrums are the base of these self destructive edifice. Best escape is outside of self, either on the wall in the air or on a shelf.  

Now who imitates who,
When One feels most real imitating art?
not sure if this is a crisis or a metamorpheus
Oct 2017 · 247
I know you?
Are you the end, severing my potential?
Are you a end, or are you a beginning a apathetic agent who clears the way for the new?
Am I old, or have I done what destiny prescribed and you are giving me a pen for a blank canvas for my own tales?
Aren’t you the gate keeper, the one who welcomes those to the starless lands?
How can I write anew tale at the end of all tales, do I need to? there is no light to show my glory no light to revel my despair
Ah, you are death.
A poem; a bout, the acceptance of death
We fear you because of your necessity but heed not the toll of neccesity on you.
You are the owls ***** in the night.
The solace at the end of the longest and most periless of trials.
To know about you is to fear you but to know you is to love.
you are my friend and the last I will ever see.
I know you?
A poem about death, a miss who's misunderstood
Aug 2017 · 388
Self/Portrait
semblance of a valley forest on fire
Cascading black ethereal smoke in shapes of bouqued flowers, impurities purged in the crucible that is my rampaging thought.

baked browned clay surrounding the fluid paths to the ocean or is it to see?
Its peaks and crevasses the features one can see but the bellows and songs of these dancing mountains and volcano are what one remembers.

Rumbling moats, you can't see the fire but there is smoke. Ebony trees which sway ever so slightly in the breeze both a crown, a symbol of majesty, and masculine pedigree.
A portrait that can only be drawn by gaia when I look on to this visage all Ndibona ikhaya.
Ndibona ikhaya means "I see (is)home"
Playing with imagery
Jul 2017 · 371
Untitled
I know I'm cumbersome I know i can seem like a test
something you need to overcome the one bad apple in your basket.

I know i doesn't meet your expectation. This world doesnt meet mine either.
the very air seems to be suffering for anxiety and reactive depression, understand, its in the ether

You know I'm an apathetic empath, felt every kind of woe
know life's too short always being sad, all i can do is wait see what life has in store.

I identify with nothing but myself, no delegation
Now all i know's is love no hopes no segregation
no disappointments because no expectation.

i would do the absurd, accomplish the impossible to have true joy.
radient like a triangle carried by birds,
I Tried to fool the system like the horse did troy.
Messing with pronouns and nouns
Wrote alot while i was in the dark too scared to share those but this is when i first started seeing a light
May 2017 · 333
Unwanted Known knowns
The unfathomable abyss gradually expanding, as if to go unnoticed, yet it's intolerable constraints are ever shrinking. What is lost in it is rarely found by most; its creations, detrimental tools for the lost and weary.
Those who know its mark are in dismay but those who have yet to meet it are the truly pitiful because the longer one is nieve to its modus operandi the deeper your dissent
Really not a poem more of a obvious riddle
Nov 2016 · 403
Lullyby//10 word
Tired of being Awake and Sad, least let me sleep.
Aug 2016 · 359
Untitled
More sudden than melancholy and sharper  than angst .
Can't be hidden by folly
More depressed than a 2008 bank.
Aelf
Jul 2016 · 581
Bonds//Bonds
Links in the chain,if they fall away when time sways then they play no part in the ka-ching.
Jun 2016 · 649
Nez boy//Chronomentrophobia
You've been with me from the start,  
Our distance couldn't be shorter but we are so far apart .
I miss the times we would sing for no reason.
I miss our poems written almost by our feelings.
We found happiness in the compositions of our plain
but looking back I'm clearly not the same.

The world is hardening me,
It broke my dome protecting my reality.
I lost the trust, the bank is closed,
Even in lust the lack of love shows
Because for one you need the other.
Injaka turned  into strays
my brothers, I now call them cain
But how was I able?
I was their dawg...see now I had no seat at the table.

I'm  confused I don't know what to do,
I know it is because I'm losing you.
Want to go back to the old days so we can do it the old ways.
how are we in the same place but I can barely rocognize your face?
The cities lights dazzal my sight
The cold numbs me on these city nights
The monotony is draining my will to fight i see this when i think "What would i even write?".

I wonder how you'd feel if you could see the new me.
I do know one thing I  miss you,
the old Manezi.
Injaka- south african slang meaning  friend  stems from the word inja which means dog

Losing my self
May 2016 · 359
Haiku #20
I am who I am
I can not Change what can not
Let me be me,please.
May 2016 · 328
Solution//Haiku #22
Are you Discontent?
If Disconnected from world,
Please discontinue.
Mar 2016 · 444
Haiku #16
So this is longing?
I did not know it hurt so,
Well at least I know.
Feb 2016 · 730
Question #2
I have a question? What do you see when you look at me?
A man, ***** hair, that I'm black,my croocked smile Or my poetry?
I see ,when i look upon others, an empty room ,A new plain of existence just for us two.
I say room because of the mental constructs that are divisions
Race
Nationality
Class
Religion
Its not I'm me and you are you
It should be we,banded together just to get through,
Our lives.
We differ by so little,
Why we make the small contol us is a riddle.
I have a question why do so few know of the moors?
we don't know ourselves that's why we feel we need more and more.
Why is it when we try and impress others we are frantic,
But when I am proud of my history I'm afrocentric?
I'm not pro any race unless you are talking the human race but even if thats the case the problem we face is that we feel like we are in a better place then those who live on the same plain,same world, same pace.
The animals the plants we all come from the same soil and look how we've been spoiled with abundance but that does not warrent our decadence.
We have to destroy these  edifice
Errected using false truthes,  fear, blood and sacrifice.
Why is so much hidden
Why is the topic of civilized color forbidden?
Why do you have to be better?
Who are you trying to be better than?
Where is the quantified data?
Why can't we just be human?
I wrote this to vent. Had certain encounters with people which showed me this is still a problem, race. i don't understand why people dont learn more about themselves and others before making swinging ignorant statements.
Feb 2016 · 551
Untitled
Physical pain? Emotional pain?; All the same, one is for now the other remains.
Dec 2015 · 369
Haiku #12
Like ink on a page
You are paint on a canvas
You, a masterpiece
Oct 2015 · 543
Lazy//generationY
I've seen my life form a birds eye view
So small, so mundane , so insignificant.
I've viewed others lives ,moves by cues,
Hollow emotions through the daily regiment.
These edifices hearding us on the road of repetition and mediocrity
We are a species with amnesia,
What truly has changed since the era of Socrates?
We have only learned how to live in decadence and leisure.
We have weapons of mass destruction
Falsely reasoned as mass protection
We have fast foods but still people go hungry.
We repeat our mistakes again and again what is that? Insanity.
A kin to 1+1=2
If we do not change we are doomed.
When those in power forever pass the buck
And teach us how to
but are angry when we do
What the ****
Procrastinating whilst in need of revolution
Making problems that have nearly no solutions
Outdated tuition
Weak constitutions
The line between order and chaos is hazy
What will you do
"We leave the rest to you.."

Be honest you are just lazy
There has been a lot of controversy here recently with the universities and fees. seeing how we as the youth banded together and how the generation before us has acted during all this gave me inspiration and this is the result.
Oct 2015 · 705
Sensei
You guided me, you showed me a world different from the plain I had existed in,
You showed me my own twisted and tormented visage.
 
Sensei you were my light, your radiance was blinding,

But I saw it,

The abyss you left in your wake the ones left with no way to see,
Their eyes left useless,
their steps chaotic,
their hearts empty,
their minds in ruin.

Sensei this was your art.

Thisis is my name and now this is my domain

This is where I am king.

Sensei why do you look so pained?
addiction it becomes who you are.
Aug 2015 · 464
Some time//now
It's been some time since we were "in love",
But the feeling I ha­ve for you stand on truelove.
It's been some time since we saw ey­e to eye,
Buts these actions are the same to enter the sky.
It's ­hasn't been that long since I felt your
 touch,
But when you felt­ it I could see you didn't enjoy it much.
It's been some time since I saw you truly 
smile,
But to be­ honest no one has seen mine in a while.
It's been some time sinc­e we supported
each other,
But now ,at the edge, we will balance ­on 
one another.
Aug 2015 · 691
Haiku #9
I'm an observer,
I'm both within and without.
I see all your masks.
In the mist I remeber in the shadows I learn into the crowd I observe
Jun 2015 · 676
Hedonism
I do it so I can feel pleasure,
Searching for battle, ***, and treasure.
I take them to be numb as a rock or light as a feather.
They say slow down ,will I? Ha Never.
I ride dragons and keep company with the green lady.
I love this girl because she never questions my fidelity,
I abuse her, burn her on a pire as if for witchery.
Her name is Mary.
I have no god in my pantheon except Eros,
He goes by many names ethanol, E and blow.
He saves me from monotony, its nagging like a stubbed toe.
He runs the world like a ring master at a circus show.
We are lions being whipped and taunted
Because to fill the void is all we wanted.
Another part of my muses series on lusts addict family member hedonism
Jun 2015 · 679
A suffocating love
I love you.
I want nothing but the best for you.
You love me
But you just don't want to be hurt by me;
Your passive aggressive threats,
Your unwarranted mistrust of me,
The constent questions, the tests.
Love is supossed to fly and be free,
But all I feel is loves firm grip on my throat its talons digging in to my very soul,
Bleeding me of my empathy.
Am I in this love to fulfill a role?
Is this now my reality?
I'm cracking under the pressure
My psyche beaten and bruised by your ups and downs.
You say "this is a love that's forever"
I smile at you but this smile hides a frown

I love you but it feels like it needs an -e and a -d
because I don't want the love you give me
I can't take much more of this

Poem in my muses series
May 2015 · 366
Haiku #8 (10w)
Now I am "okay"
It can change without warning,
Inevitable
Emotions are fickle, I learn this everyday
Apr 2015 · 931
Muse
Lust, pain, depression, lose and love are my muse.
lust's passion which knows no bounds frees me.
pain's intensity and relentlessness push me.
Depression's depth, which out class even the sea, teaches me.
Lose like a loaded gun keeps focus and flashes what is important to me.
love with its fickle sway like a new flame ignites my page for all the world to see.
My muse are not new they are not uncommon they are rusted and jagged but they are the pillars on which all life and poetry now rests they guide us-
No they control us.
What is your inspiration?
Mar 2015 · 1.2k
reality(10w)
I am just a Jester disguised in a Kings regalia
Leadership is not my forte
Feb 2015 · 390
Recently(10w)
I fall in love quickly, I fall out even quicker
Haven't posted in a while this is why
And here they come with their beautiful demeanour ,with their empty eyes laced with an allure stronger then the forces which construct our physical forms.

They speak in perfect sequence as if it had be rehearsed but I've heard these words before, of course, they've been here before they're regulars to my bar, filled with my bottled emotions.

They spoke of no wonders or such tacky things they spoke of a peace unparalleled, a welcome change to my current state of mind, a place where there is "no more judgment", "no more ridicule","no more lies" and "no more death" a place where I can be myself.

As they imbibed themselves with my fermented hopes, dreams and beliefs they grew bolder with each bottle they emptied.

"How can you live in this place it's a cesspool, so cluttered so unsure"

it's my home I play with the cards life has dealt me-

"ah there is the problem you are bound by life why not be free?".

I see no other path.

"there is".

they slide me an object,

"keep the change"

and they left.

the object was a box reading "the tool of your salvation" it had a note  end the lie, end your __.
I closed up shop,they are right, it was time for a change,
So this is my good bye.
There is no death after death
I was at the edge.
She pulled me back and sobered me why couldn't i do that for her
Dec 2014 · 3.5k
Haiku #7
Oh Adolescents
Emotional highs and lows
We mellow with age
I've been hurt before, love's pain seems to be my chronic affliction,
I've never been shown this much affection.

Please excuse my apprehensive reactions, if my participation feels like I'm just going through the motions- I find it hard to portray my emotions.

I've had so many lust filled stints; That's why I don't know if I can accept this, your love that is.
You're out of my league I know that ; I'm, in the eyes of those I've loved, just : emotional,untalented, unathletic, poor and fat those things I just can't forget.

My insecurities
a guard,a shield, they limit me to what I think I deserve and I don't deserve to be happy and with you that's all I know I can be.
Forgive me,
if It takes me time to say those 3 words, even when my heart beats like the wings of a humming bird, it's just I can't imagine why you have these feeling for me,
my Baby TT
I want this to last so I will wait a while until I say my, normal, last words
Oct 2014 · 3.7k
A toast
Let's make a toast partake if you hear my voice beyond the coasts.

To our past the hurst, the Many learning curves buried in the sands of time.

To our here and now The good the bad and the ugly take a bow.

To our future I hope you never
come.
A toast
Oct 2014 · 1.1k
Inside you
This isn't what you think it is,
this has little to do with your soft lips and smooth skin,  
This has to do with what they enclose, not your toned muscles and the curves they form,
This isn't about your anatomy our how well ours meld together in the still of the day or the silence of the night now filled with our moans.
This is deeper then that,
they say your eyes, oh how beautiful they are as they look in to mine, are the windows to your soul.
Your heart,your mind,your soul that is what matters to me.
what is on the inside of the gift is what makes it worth it not the wrapping and you are a gift to my existence, you bring out the best in me with what is inside  you.
I feel too much and show too little.
I'll finally say what has to be said and hope for the best.
Oct 2014 · 335
Attempt a 10w
What are these ten words?
A view into my mind.
First attempt
Oct 2014 · 739
New tenants
A
        ghost, ghoul and demon
live where my
        trust,love and happiness
used to be, their names are
        past,present and future.
Oct 2014 · 1.1k
Haiku #6
Now you know it all
Now tell me what has changed?
Nothing ever does.
Oct 2014 · 1.2k
Haiku #5
Why does it linger
open wounds with out care rot
So let it fester.
Aug 2014 · 427
Untitled
As my eyes slant I see stars,
Even though I haven't reached my dreams I wonder how I got this far
as I let the gum dry I wonder how I got this high now longing over days gone by.
As I spark this flame,
I realize this feeling of loning is mine I'm to blame.
As I inhale,
I think of their skin soft, as a cloud but not as pale lips of rose to me readily exposed.
As I renew my vibe,
even though life right now isn't the best it has been kind.
As my mind flows,
my entropy grows I'm the opposite of low if you could see my aura you'd know it glows.
As I center myself no thought that I need help,these feelings are mine to be seen not felt,by others,not my friends nor the women in my bed--
my lover more like my ****** this is nothing deeper then flesh.
let me put my mind to rest.

As I stare at the cities skyline and the clocks time while writing these rhymes I remember this world, is mine.
Need a name comment below what you think it should be
Aug 2014 · 1.5k
Limerick #2
I know the way to her heart,
And no, it's not through laughs
I'll climb her like a ladder,
**** like a jack hammer
But eat her out for starts.
****** humor but I feel as if this will be a standard for my limericks
Jul 2014 · 564
As we lie by the berg.
I need to stop this love for the sake of my nerves so what's left of my mind will be preserved, I have a space reserved for you, not for you two if you wanted it to be this kind of sum you shouldn't have said I was the one but you are not to blame alone because I was in the zone when I let you in my home, in my room, way too soon like waking up to the moon.

We had said it was like a dream now my eyes are open and it seems you've sold this dream before, I don't judge but others might've call you a ***** but I'm not like that but I didn't think you were like this...
I told you my fears most hidden from my closest peers and brethren considering confessing to a reverend or a rabbi or a pastor no I will converse with my master Roshi but,
Roshi's very tired
          He's lying on his bed
He's been living with the living
          and dying with the dead.
Relating to L.Cohen.
I can't believe how you're playing me.
Man!...

**** "love".

**** the fact you like it rough,
My lust would be enough but, you are too perfect to let slip. I want you by my side no reason to hide I am yours you are mine.

But.

What is a perfect person at the wrong time?
A regret and burden on the mind.

It was like a dream so perfectly seamed it seemed life leans to be mean disguising pestilence as cream.
Original Spoken word scribed and structured as it is was said.
I needed to get this off my chest and I know *she* will read this,
Jul 2014 · 748
We are young.
As I sway out of the fray and check if she's ok, "bae?" All she can say is "hey",
We reach for the ash tray we've lost our way I have a smile on my face which happiness betrays because W.A.Y.
eyes so low I Could be Stevie or Ray you can decide after you've heard me play. Allow my notes in your ear like sweet nothings, I run my fingers through your hair as I smell you in the air and taste you on my lips as we are lip to lip...
have a lil sip of this lean woh slow down don't be so keen if you know what I mean these words aren't twisted you don't need to be gifted not even lifted to get the picture but some can't relate ukuva?
let me skip this bit even though it was anything but quick. She lays on my chest as I knead her ******* eyes of earth and emerald stares burning me like embers lets me remember I'm not in Oz or the land of OOH we just chilling like the weather in May in my room what can I say but W.A.Y.
Ukuva: you hear/understand (Xhosa)
W.A.Y.: we are young
Oz: mystical land
Land of OOH: adventure time land
Jun 2014 · 558
A passion
I knew you before I knew your name
I knew you and I felt the same
I knew I would love your taste, your scent
I knew our passion was hell bent
I know I cant move this fast but it feels so right
I remember how you knew where to bite
I want to convay with you during the day
And i want to feel you in the still of the night
I met her at least i hope so my kindred spirit my new passion
Jun 2014 · 939
my vices (ode to mine)
I love your voice, I love your eyes.
I love your style and what it hids.
I love your hair so dark,so strong. relaxed, natural what matters most is who's it on.
I love your skin so soft and smooth. I know those scars are because of what you've put yourself through.
I love your smile, teeth as white as the moon. I'd love to see your true smile so rarely shown.
I love your spirit so free so strong.
I know in time you'll see here's where it belongs.
Jun 2014 · 838
A Sound
I'm sure I heard it
Did you ?
The snap or was it a clap
Can't tell it's been too distorted and echoed around my empty soul
Or rather this husk of what I used to feel: the love the triumph the passion the validation .

Now I'm sure I heard it or was it you clicking and praising my words yeah maybe that's what I heard no I can feel the sinking this hole in my chest I can't listen to my heart it's voice has be laid to rest six feet is quiet a feat.

There it is again
no that was just a ding for an idea or a notion pleading to me to take action but this is a fallacy, a distraction
I'm ignoring the signs to busy thinking what is mine rather then keeping what was mine now I'm left with nothing

ahh

There it is, that distinctive ring

listen...

The timbre is right I can hear the angels sing.
this cold unloving content or is it fury I can't know surely but this time, this time.. I heard the snap of my mind

It sounded like click  . clack . **bang
Wrote this now I'm a Tad rust I must say
May 2014 · 1.9k
Limerick #1
There once was a man from Calcutta
he spat game like no other,
women would sleek and swoon
take him to their room
this list includes your mother.
Am I still alive, or is this all just memories?
Am I on my death bed,looking back at at my misadventures and fallacies?
Am I slipping in to the abyss, are these my last thoughts?
Is this my pinnacle, did I ever learn what I have been taught?
Did I live the life I hoped for and envisioned,
Or have I lived a life full of regrets because of my decisions?
Did I find love or did I wallow in hate?
Did I practice what I preach and fight against what people call "fate",
Or did I submit to my anxiety and fears?
I can't help but wonder is this ink so wet because of all my future tears?...
I'll wait and see and what is Ment to be will be, if it suits me.
But I'll have to wait and see
Apr 2014 · 416
Haiku #4
Am I still alive
or is this just memories
I can't help but cry
Apr 2014 · 5.8k
Her character
I love how: she looks, she smells, she tastes, she makes me feel, she makes me act, she just makes good vibes. I love you Mary Jane
I am here because of you
I have been able to Expirience this world because of you two
And I am thankful for this
But you done so much more here's a short list
You've been a pillar that's always there and even when you are mad I know you care.
You've shown me how to act and shown me I don't know all the facts.
When I see you two what I perceive Is a wish, a dream I hope to ,one day, achieve.
you've shown me to keep my composure in life, keep strong when things seems strife because it is with in my power to make it right.
You've given me goals to reach and it won't be easy you see,
but I'll make you proud if I get knocked down I'll get right back on my feet because that's what you have taught me.
You've given me more then I can explain in words, to think I could even scrap the top was quiet absurd but I just needed to show I appreciate what you have done so this is a kind of thank you letter from your eldest son.
I wrote this to my parents for their anniversary 17 years love them so much
Mar 2014 · 2.7k
Such is such
Such ignorance,
such temptation,
Such Ambition,
such delusions of grander,
such hedonism,
such debauchery,
such betrayal,
Such jealousy,
Such bigotry,
Such caprice,
Such entropy,
Such stupidity?
such is human Nature.
Mar 2014 · 1.3k
A reminder
This cough is a reminder of a renewed addiction to take stead until a new one comes along.

These scars are a reminder of how strong I can be,but how weak I was.

This callus which pumps away in my body is a reminder of how dangerous yet fleeting "love" is.

These dry cheeks are a reminder of how many tears I have shed for friend and foe, blurred by the gleam in my eyes.

This tremble is a reminder of how plagued by anxiety I am, Why? I won't know till it's too late.

These pictures are a reminder of how many of who I see are not with me now , taken away by time or ,most often, by death.

This ache only reminds me why I envy them so.

These memory's serve as a reminder of my mistakes in this life ,and oh how they disappoint me.

This poem is a reminder of why I've done what I'm doing.

Now please don't forget me.
Alt title /Remember me as I was. My most recent dark state poem
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