We’re Gonna Need Some Sunglasses For This Mushroom Cloud

Gonna need some sunglasses for this one,
it’s 6AM I’m in LA it’s been a long night for sure,
just gotta get into that cafe get that cappuccino,
then get safely unnoticed and back to the idling car,

Jar,
of Flies,
sorry I’m not sorry,
that’s a bad reference to 1995,

bad because Jar of Flies was a different year,
different year different name,
’95 was self-titled,
‘Alice In Chains’,

remind me again,
what the heck we’re talking about,
this poem has no parameters,
it’s off course but still going along,

gonna need some sunglasses for this one,
like my glasses like I like my roast,
with my Valentino’s and dark cappuccino,
and you with your mimosa my dear Yoda let us toast,

“To the Next Episode!” let’s go,

No Dre though it’s more of a Good Day,
not to be rude to Ice Cube but I got ice cubes in my flute,
in perpetual motion from chronic transitions of change,
and when I say Change I’m not talking about Rock The Vote,

because we all see where voting got us,
now we got ‘ Donald Duck Mr. Talk A lot of Nonsense’,
we got that stone cold soviet ****** Kim Jong-un launching stunner missiles like Steve Austin,
dropping finishing moves ’Cold Stunning’ but instead of a drop kick he’s bomb launching,

we can’t even stop him as in Kim Jong-un with bad movies and meetings with Dennis Rodman,

Oh My God Son!

We’re really gonna need some sunglasses for this one,
have you ever seen the magnificence of an Atom Bomb,
a mushroom clouds of the most beautiful hues,
a moment of infinite Light just before the moment we’re all eternally gone…

∆ Aaron LA Lux ∆

Conceived In Hollywood

Conceived inside of Hollywood,
you have no idea what it means to be me,
and that’s not saying we can’t relate to basic things,
but honestly other than that we wear different rings,

we move in different circles,
we don’t lose our bets or virtues,
careful kid which path you choose,
because the Truth it can hurt you,

and that’s the true too,

see,

I was conceived,

inside of Hollywood,
you have no idea what it means to be me,
and that’s not saying we can’t relate to basic things,
but honestly other than that we wear different rings,

I’ve been assigned and equipped with a grand design by Thee Divine,

seriously I’m,
not telling you anything you don’t already know,
The Secret is that there’s no secret,
even though there’s a difference between backstage and front of show,

front of show shows shows to show off to the Masses wearing rose colored glasses,
meanwhile the whole time the action that’s happening backstage is outlandish I know,

those in the In Crowd conversating and communicating to conduct the energy flow,

In other words out there is where the soulless try and fill their empty shells with our energy,
and in here is where we build and learn and communicate to create everything for the show,

so,

what choice does that leave me with,
was initiated before birth,
see I’m more than a human I’m an idea,
I am the healing I am the hurt,

I am in line to have the last laugh even though my pole is first,

pole,
as in pole position,
should have to spell it out for you,
but sometimes you have to open up their eyes before they can see the vision,

my eyes are open as a wise old Owl perched upon a castle’s turret having visions,

this just in,
no News is news,
when,
you are Reality,

I was conceived,

inside of Hollywood,
you have no idea what it means to be me,
and that’s not saying we can’t relate to basic things,
but honestly other than that we wear different rings,

we know different people,
we do different things,
there’s very few who rule it’s true,
that’s not a mystery,

that’s not even a dispute,

that’s fact,
100% Truth.

∆ Aaron LA Lux ∆

Close Enough To Sunday

It’s all fckt up,
can’t even pretend that it’s not,
I get invited out to these events,
where everyone’s dressed up,

but I’m not,
I’m there in jeans and a t-shirt,
thanking those that are thanking me for writing these prophecies,
but really I’m not sure what all this work was or is really worth…

written about ten books,
multiple international best sellers,
#1 Poetry Book in The World,
3 times in a row for worse or for better,

but really,
what am I saying,
and really,
what are you saying,

it’s all fckt up,
and we all know it,
still we pretend it’s all good till the end,
we had a Chance we just needed to not blow it,

but we did,
we neglected the earth,
even though we all knew and know,
that that Moment of Truth will hurt,

I can’t even have a drink at a club,
without feeling guilty for the pollution we’ve caused,
even when those drinks are free and served with a smile,
because I know that smile is covering some recently retreated sores,

we’ve neglected the poor,
and caused significant scars,
on the skin of the earth,
now Musk wants to colonize Mars,

and that’s not a shot at Elon,
I trust him and his vision,
he’s a genius creation,
a creative genius that generally makes good decisions,

I’m just saying,
given the current position,
whether Elon Musk or a homeless pigeon,
we’re all fckt and that’s the fckn situation,

it’s all fckt up,
can’t even pretend that it’s not,
I get invited out to these events,
where everyone’s dressed up,

but I’m not,
I’m there in jeans and a t-shirt,
thanking those that are thanking me for writing these prophecies,
but really I’m not sure what all this work was or is really worth…

still I put in work,
verse after verse,
cliche and cliche,
the Gift & The Curse,

like somehow,
I’ll be able to write all our wrongs,
answer all the questions,
and celebrate with sounds,

make Love and make Mysteries,
with a Stranger in a Strange Town,
and I’ve been up till way too Late:30 lately,
too tired to debate or hesitate when it’s time to get down,

down,
here,
the sky looks so beautiful,
the clouds,
from the ground,
are everything I choose to show,

so,
whatever,
what more can we say,
let’s go,
wherever,
‘cause when we've got it all the only thing we want to get is away,

want for nothing else,
it’s Close Enough to Sunday,
let’s take some time to take some time,
no need to go right now ‘cause we all go one way or another one day,

soon,

so,
so what,
so,
we’re fckt,

it’s all fckt up,
can’t even pretend that it’s not,
I get invited out to these events,
where everyone’s dressed up,

but I’m not,
I’m there in jeans and a t-shirt,
thanking those that are thanking me for writing these prophecies,
but really I’m not sure what all this work was or is really worth…

∆ Aaron La Lux ∆

Don’t Forget The Stars

Almost forgot what the stars looked like,
don’t forget what the stars look like,

the system’s rigged,
how many times have you heard that?

I’m speaking to you,
please listen,
for whatever these words are worth,
that is what is given,

sittin’,

rocking’ in a lawn chair,

suspended,
in thin air,

the Moon’s glow behind the trees needles,
reminds me we all are God,

which is good because I’d almost forgot,

almost forgot what the stars looked like,
don’t forget what the stars look like,

the system’s rigged,
how many times have you heard that?

∆ Aaron LA Lux ∆

Marley Brando

So many options,
can’t say too many options,
but honestly what do you do,
when even too much is not enough,

“What?”,

“Were you saying something?,
I feel like I’m in a dream,
I’m asking for affirming,
because I don’t feel a thing…”,

You stare at me with those infinite eyes,
“I feel exactly the same way.”,
then you shift your gaze,
and stare off for eternity,

as that fire inside keeps burning me,

something simmering inside is burning me,

anxious and pacing,
all out of patience,
feeling like a Patient in a ******-Ward society,
yes I’m fine so please don’t bother me,
I won’t sign over royalties and no I don’t need notoriety,

I’ll leave that for the words,
and all the flabby flack from the flock of ruffle feathered haters,
waiting in the wings I fly by & leave that for the Birds,
word word word,

words are what we scribe as a Writer of The Times,
words to explain when I’m gone,

words to explain when we’re gone,
when the memories have all faded,
because unless a Tyrant burns the books,
we’ll have our history scribed onto these pages,

lopsided but liberated,
feeling like a rat in a cage,
or a canary in a coalmine,
consumed with the thought to “Just get way.”,

just get away,
I’m already gone anyways,
don’t be fooled by this shell of a body,
I’ve been through Hell so now I’m in The Hills where I party,

Heaven can wait I’m on the Guest-List anyways so I won’t have to waste time at The Gate,

ready to party,
with Jim Morrison and Bob Marley,
and Brando but no Commando,
yeah I’m talking to you Sylvester sorry,

Charlie,
Chaplin for certain,
Sheen well we’ll see,
Janis, Jackson, Kurt and,
Pac and it don’t stop,

does it,
what’s in,
your wallet,
Rest In Peace,
Christopher Wallace,

smoking a chalice,
on Cloud 9 with Marley Brando,
cool as an Ice Cream Sundae,
relaxing watching the world go bananas,

B-A-N-A-N-A-S,

shout out to Gwen,
Steph,
I spin around and ask,
“What is this,
I meanI know it sounds cliche,
but does any of this really exist?”,

“Oh and where’d my mind go?”,

So many options,
won’t say too many though,
but honestly what do you do,
when even too much is not enough?,

“What?”,

“Were you saying something?,
I feel like I’m in a dream,
I’m asking for affirming,
because I don’t feel a thing…”…

∆ Aaron LA Lux ∆

author of 3 #1 Best Sellers,
& The Poetry Trilogy
∆

I Make Art,

and if you’re an artist too,
and you know the commitment to the Freedom,
that you give must be true,
see in order to get paid dues you must first pay dues,

I’m sorry,
I’m not sorry,
I’m rhyming again ‘cause I don’t know what else to do,

sounding cliche as fck,
I’m cliche as fck,
but it’s the best kind of cliche,
être bon mi amore let’s sail away,

who cares if the skies are grey,
who cares if the skies are blue,
not you we are a rainbow,
but a rainbow with more than 50 shades,

forget the reference,
or reference the reference,
I prefer to refer the next move to you,
pardon the indifference,
I’m numb from this business,
to the point where the only 1’s I trust are the Crew,

true true,

and who’s the Crew dude?

It’s an eclectic collection of artist,
who’s credit is way over due,

we paid dues and pay dues,
now their new News is our old News,
turning grey skies to blue through the emotions we do,
we’re hippy chic celebrities like that guy from The Trews,

shout out to Katy because I forgot her ex’s name,
respect to Katy for mastering the game,

an artist that worked to the pinnacle,
to trade Time & Money for Fortune and Fame,
and everything currently material is attained,
from currency accrued by acting atop the the Art Game,

top of the A,
the pinnacle the peak,
get it the top of the “A”,
now do you see?

See,

I Make Art,

and if you’re an artist too,
and you know the commitment to the Freedom,
that you give must be true,
see in order to get paid dues you must first pay dues,

I’m sorry,
I’m not sorry,
I’m rhyming again ‘cause I don’t know what else to do,

sounding cliche as fck,
I’m cliche as fck,
but it’s the best kind of cliche,
être bon mi amore let’s sail away,

who cares if the skies are grey,
who cares if the skies are blue,
not you we are a rainbow,
but a rainbow with more than 50 shades,

forget the reference,
or reference the reference,
I prefer to refer the next move to you,
pardon the indifference,
I’m numb from this business,
to the point where the only 1’s I trust are the Crew,

true true,

and who’s the Crew dude?

It’s an eclectic collection of artist,
who’s credit is way over due,

we paid dues and pay dues,
now their new News is our old News,
turning grey skies to blue through the emotions we do,
we’re hippy chic celebrities like that guy from The Trews,

shout out to Katy because I forgot her ex’s name,
respect to Katy for mastering the game,

an artist that worked to the pinnacle,
to trade Time & Money for Fortune and Fame,
and everything currently material is attained,
from currency accrued by acting atop the the Art Game,

top of the A,
the pinnacle the peak,
get it the top of the “A”,
now do you see?

See,

I Make Art.

∆ Aaron LA Lux ∆

The Basketball Diaries

I’m losing my faith in humanity,
and I’m just as much a part of the problem,
here I’ll explain an example,
it involves The Basketball Diaries,

went to a rooftop cinema in Budapest,
there I met two beautiful girls,
they brought me up to the VIP,
fed me drinks and helped me feel again,

it was a bit surreal,
on that rooftop,
watching Leo on the big screen,
it’s always surreal seeing someone on screen that I’ve actually met,

Leo’s a cool guy,
trying to save the world even though it all seems hopeless,
anyways there I was watching Leonardo DiCaprio,
play the starring role of a strung out poet,

the parallels are there,
but my addiction is not ******,
yes I’m strung out,
but my drug of choice is women friends,

so when the two girls in the VIP,
got closer and closer to me,
I feel deeper and deeper in love,
because I love unconditionally without apologies,

we went back to my place,
I put some videos on my projector screen,
I almost had *** with one of them,
the one I though would be my girlfriend,

her friend interrupted,
girl interrupted,
boy interrupted,
she said she wanted a guy to have *** with too,

so we went back out,
albeit reluctantly,
to a cliche club with a bunch of tourist,
so my girl’s friend could get some exotic ****,

it was then I realized,
as the two danced together,
trying to lure in a man,
just to get him inside of them,

that humanity is truly lost,
and apart of me died,
right there on that dance floor,
I felt the club,

see,
I don’t want to find a girl to just fck at night,
I don’t want a dawn goodbye,
I want mimosas with my lover at brunch the next day,

I guess I’m too much of a romantic,
that’s what I get for being a poet,
feeling strung out like Leo,
just searching for another fix,

just chasing that first high,
that first real love,
but all I find out here these days,
is ******* and hoes that are counterfeit,

fck it,

I’m so done,
maybe I should become a monk,
my life is too blessed,
to mess with these girls that couldn’t care less,

I miss,
humanity,
and I watch it sparkle and fade,
as I add another piece of me to this charade,

a piece of me died on that dance floor,
and I probably deserved the pain that brought,
and call me naive or whatever,
but I still feel that not all hope is lost,

see,

I’m losing my faith in humanity,
and I’m just as much a part of the problem,
here I’ll explain an example,
it involves The Basketball Diaries…

∆ Aaron LA Lux ∆

Back In America

I swear,
I’d give away every dollar I’ve ever made to charity,
if it would bring relief to the billions in need at the least,
and at the most I’d hope it could maybe contribute to world peace,

I’m back in America,
writing checks and feeling empty,
skin’s numb mind’s gone,
Death comes for everyone eventually…

Here,
have the American Dream with this beautiful house it’s turnkey…

Whoa,
it’s getting intense isn’t it,
but I guess,
it’s always been at least a little bit,

signing checks and paying taxes,
trying to balance,
on a world that’s off it’s axis,
pedal to the metal diesel by the gallons,

I.
Am.
A.
Machine.

and I swear the greatest compliment to any artist,
is that their work is something no one’s ever seen,

a defying gesture of difference,
a creation of something truly original,
a work of art that covers both sides,
both obviously brilliant and intelligently subliminal,

minimal,
maximal,
adjust,
your attitude,

this is Life,
you’re living it,
better be nice,
better be respectful,

hey you,
hello from the other side,
as far as I can tell you’re not Adele,
oh well we’re still gonna ride,

petal to the metal a Freak and a Fellow,
I’ve got it all I swear I’d give it all away,
become a lost prophet that’s lost all but the topic,
on point still so let’s get back to the point I must make,

money doesn’t buy morals,
and God of course is real,
so if you want to really be wealthy,
give more to charity so the hurt can heal,

I swear,
I’d give away every dollar I’ve ever made to charity,
if it would bring relief to the billions in need at the least,
and at the most I’d hope it could maybe contribute to world peace,

I’m back in America,
writing checks and feeling empty,
skin’s numb mind’s gone,
Death comes for everyone eventually…

∆ Aaron LA Lux ∆

00:00 Valentines Day

It’s midnight,
and I’m,
alone again,
trying to fill the time,
with these words I write,

watched the Grammy’s last night,
Twenty One Pilots,
standing there in their underwear,
reminding us that we can be,
anything,

Hollywood,
my home,
so many people,
at the Grammy’s,
I’ve met and befriended,

but sometimes,
the enthusiasm seems so gone,
it feels like we’re living,
after the credits when the film has ended,

like,

what’s happened to us,
where have we gone,
and why,
do we still feel,
so totally alone,

supposed to be gone by the morning,
flight to Cabo to pick up my truck,
just flew in from Australia,
found letters from the IRS in my PO Box,
welcome home boy now it’s time to pay your tax,

met my accountant tonight,
gave him all the paperwork,
we chatted for a minute in his Range Rover,
I made a joke about having a black accountant,
he reminded me of the Basquiat photo I’d given him,

Basquiat in the 80’s,
looking awkward as fck,
holding a FroZade cup in his hand,
a crooked No Parking sign standing by,
and the ‘ol Twin Towers towering in the hazed background,

another genius gone before his time,
sometimes the art we create is ahead of us,
sometimes we have to watch our success from the Heavens,
1 2 3 4 5 6 7,
8 9 10 11,
12,

It’s midnight,
and I’m,
alone again,
trying to fill the time,
with these words I write,

watched the Grammy’s last night,
Twenty One Pilots,
standing there in their underwear,
reminding us that we can be,
anything…

∆ Aaron La Lux ∆

You know what they say,

“It’s better to have loved and lost,
than never to have loved at all.”,

but when someone you love leaves you,
that saying feels like the farthest thing from the truth,

she’s less than a meter away from me,
only a sleeping cat separates us on our bed,
but in this moment,
we feel worlds apart,

and we’re both trying to keep our independence,
and neither one of us knows who will break first,

she’s leaving me,
and I can’t think of a more romantic place to leave someone,

we are in a house on a hill in Ubud,
a place so beautiful this could be a Fairy Tale,

but this is no fairy tale,
this is a day dream turned nightmare,
this is the exactly the type of situation,
that’s made me almost give up on love,

like,
why even give all our energy to a person,
when we know the person is just going to go away,
go away like every one before and after,

because everyone goes away,

she’s already gone away,
I felt her leave yesterday,
as she sat chatting to a friend on Messenger,
sometimes someone doesn’t have to say a thing to say “Goodbye”,

sometimes someone can leave you even when they are still in the same room,

she is still here but we both know she’s already gone,

she’s less than a meter away from me,
only a sleeping cat separates us on our bed,
but in this moment,
we feel worlds apart,

and I wonder where she’s headed,
she says back to Melbourne,
but part of me doesn’t believe her,
part of me believes she’s escaping back to Venus,

because she’s not from Melbourne,
and she’d only been there a week when I met her,
and we both know Venus is where she’s really from,
we both know there’s nothing for her in Melbourne,

nothing except for maybe a minimum wage job,
working the the same system she claims to reject,
nothing except a few childhood friends,
high on drugs ready to bring her down,

and I want to tell her all of this,
but she reads English better than she hears it,
so I’d rather write it all out for her,
so that she can take the time to read it,

because even though,
she stumbles with English a bit,
we both speak the language of Love perfectly,
and that is why I wrote her this,

and I want to tell her all of this,
but I’ve never been the best orator,
so I just write it all down because I’m a poet,
and think maybe I’ll send it to her later,

but not now,
because I love her too much to have her stay,
have you ever loved someone so much,
that you just wanted them to go away?

And that is why I say,
maybe I’ll just send it to her later,

but later,
never comes,
life is what happens,
while we are making plans,

there is no future,
there is no past,
there is only,
this exact moment right here,

here,

in this moment,
she’s less than a meter away from me,
only a sleeping cat separates us on our bed,
but we lay worlds apart,

and that is why when they say,
“It’s better to have loved and lost,
than never to have loved at all.”,
I say that saying feels like the farthest thing from the truth…

∆ Aaron La Lux ∆

author of the largest collection of poetry ever published

Amnesia Deja Vu

Amnesia Deja Vu,
or Deja Va Amnesia,
don’t remember to remember to,
but I do remember repeating,

please,
remind me why we’re alive,
what Star are you that’s fallen,
and how have you survived,

no lie,
no woman,
no cry,

please,
remind me why we are alive,

remind me,
why I continue to right,

right now,
designated as a scribe,
to help us remember the memories,

help me help you,
so cliche and still totally true,

Amnesia,
Deja,
Vu…

∆ Aaron LA Lux ∆

New Book Here: https://www.amazon.com/dp/1540322262

Her eyes look past,

past my postured figure,
past the drunkard who’s ****** himself,
who sulks in his **** soaked pants,
sulking in drowned regrets and fog,

past the high heeled woman,
who steps over the drunkard’s liquid lines,
which flow across soot stained concrete,
upon this boulevard on this street in Budapest,

we could have been anywhere.

She’s in a bad mood,
doesn’t want to talk,
doesn’t want to listen,
probably doesn’t want to even live,

I understand her,
better than I care to admit,
she’s battling a lung affection,
she’s battling the delusioned stares of countless lustful men,

I tell her she doesn’t have to talk,
I tell her she doesn’t have to listen,
I tell her she’s welcome to come in,
to my sanctuary and simply exist there,

she refuses all my offers,
and I wonder,
what she sees,
when she stares past everything she sees,

I tell her I’m going to write a poem about her,
she asks why,
I tell her I’m a poet and that’s what I do,
I write about moments just like this one,

even though I know words are only words.

I know the frustration,
of trying to explain the unexplainable,
I know the frustration,
of trying to put all this in prose that’s easily digestible,

and herein,
lies the paradox,
if ignorance is bliss,
then genius is torture,

and we are both tortured,
and we are both in denial,
and we both know,
we may never see each other again.

Her eyes look past,

past my postured figure,
past the drunkard who’s ****** himself,
who sulks in his **** soaked pants,
sulking in drowned regrets and fog,

past the high heeled woman,
who steps over the drunkard’s liquid lines,
which flow across soot stained concrete,
upon this boulevard on this street in Budapest,

we could have been anywhere…

∆ Aaron LA Lux ∆

07/09/16

Open Anahata

Yeah,
I know,
we haven’t spoken in awhile,
and sure,
we see,
each other’s updates occasionally on our Facbook profiles,

and maybe we send a message,
every now and then,
but computers are a poor substitute,
for true human interaction,

what happened,

how have we become buried,
deep underneath more immediate thoughts,
and the farther down the messages you send be go,
the more the message you’re trying to send me gets lost,

but I still get the picture,
I acknowledge that you would’ve married me,
even though I told you I’m not fit to be a husband,
you didn’t care because you loved me unconditionally,

you love me unconditionally,
and I see now what that’s worth,
so please come home again,
I’ll welcome you with open arms and open heart,

an open door,
and an open mind,
mi casa tu casa mi amor,
please come inside,

I’ve been waiting for this moment again,
for such an incredibly long time,

I’m sorry I should have written you more after you left,
I’m sorry I should have sat with you more before you left,
I’m sorry I’m not sorry,
I’m sorry I was not ready yet,

but I’m ready now,
I fully accept,
everything you are,
and everything you’ve left,

yeah,
I know,
we haven’t spoken in awhile,
but I see now,
what we can be now,
and believe me it is beautiful,

beautiful,
come home come home,
I will welcome you,
with an open heart and open arms…

∆ Aaron LA Lux ∆

American Refugee


Head feels like a ton of bricks,
trying to retrace my misstepped steps…

Where have I awoken?

What country am I in?

Who was that girl last night?

Why did I choose to go through it again?

When will I finally say enough is enough?

Enough is enough.

Why does the poison feel so good?

I love everything that hates me,
alcohol and cigarettes,
promiscuous girls date me,
but only for a night…

A night was had,
dancing music,
flirting new friends,
we were all in it together,
a glorious moment,
with people from all over the world,
we were on top of the world,
surfing on a rocket,
on Cloud Nine with some fine felines,
bumping beats with a pocket full of sunshine,
flashy lights and flashy ladies,
drinks on me,
literally,
drinks on me,

I felt like we all felt,
so together,
so how’d I end up,
so all alone,
nursing a hangover,
with poached eggs and mochaccinos,
served by a surprisingly cute waitress,
at a cafe somewhere in New Zealand…

Head feels like a ton of bricks,
trying to retrace my steps…

I came here,
to this country,
to escape Hollywood,
where I was trapped in it’s trapping trappings,

trapped in it’s clubs,
trapped in it’s women,
trapped in it’s drugs,
trapped in it’s cliches,
so why is it,
I found myself,
on the other side of the world,
at club with some women on drugs trapped in this same cliche?

Same ****t,
different country,
I guess you can take the boy outta Hollywood,
but you can’t take the Hollywood outta the boy…

I am the world’s first American Refugee,
except I didn’t come on a boat,
in ragged clothes clinging to my body,
and ragged hopes clinging to my psyche,

I came,
on an airplane,
in a first class seat,
dining on the offerings of a corporate worldwide empire,

but it is not the means of movement,
it is the intention behind the actions that matters,

and I came,
with the intention to create a healthier life,
a cleaner life,
a better future for myself and all those I love.

I am an American Refugee,

I am an American Refugee,
fleeing the subconscious oppressions of my country,
fleeing the persecution of all things I held holy and sacred,
I am tired of witnessing the spiritual ****** of my falling comrades,

I am a American Refugee,
more specifically,
a Hollywood Refugee,
fleeing the bright lights and large egos,
searching for solace and refuge,
amongst the towering rainforest trees of New Zealand,

I fled the toxic water the toxic air and the toxic people,
to drink fresh water breathe clean are and befriend friendly people,

so why,
why,
why would I subject myself,
to the same oppressions that I’ve attempted to flee from?

Justin Bieber echoed across the dance floor,

“Is it to late to say I’m sorry now?
Yeah I know that I let you down,
is it too late to say I’m sorry now?”

“I’m sorry.”,

“Sorry.”,

“Sorry.”,

“Yeah I know that I let you down,
is it too late to say I’m sorry now?”,

and as cheesy and cliche as it sounds,
I get the chills because I knew exactly what he was saying,
and I wondered if anyone else in that club was an American Refugee,
I wondered if anyone else in that club knew what Justin Bieber was saying,
or if they were just dancing because of the beat,
and they were just singing along because that’s what they think they’re supposed to do,
because most people have to be told what’s cool,
then force fed that coolness until they have too many pairs of shoes,

no amount of shoes will ever bring you real happiness,
and I honestly apologize,
we Hollywoodians were put in a position to lead the free world,
and everyone listened to us,
you all listened to us,
you gave us your ears and your hearts,
your souls and your minds,
and all we gave you were improbable dreams,
and glorious visions,
of an unsustainable lifestyle that you go broke trying to duplicate,

when will you realize you can chase,
but you can never catch something that doesn’t really exist?

And I’m sorry,
but I give up,
I’m done,
because,

“Yeah I know once more I’ve let you down,
is it too late to say I’m sorry now?”.

I’m sick and tired so I’m retiring,
I’m retreating to build a retreat,
somewhere in New Zealand,
where I can be free again,

and I’ve finally made it here,
but it seems mentally I’m not prepared,
because I’m still going to clubs with a bunch of girls,
then getting used up foolishly because I foolishly thought they cared,

who cares?

I don’t want the weight of the world on my shoulders anymore,
I don’t need all eyes on me,
I just want to get rid of all my wants,
so that I can finally be freed and have all that I need,

you must get rid of your wants,
so you can do what you like,

and I do feel a little bit relieved to finally be in New Zealand,
but honestly the weight of the world is still on my shoulders,

I still can’t shake this feeling,
that I’m just going through the routine,
as I write these words on this laptop,
and fuel my words with free range eggs and caffeine,

up on this mountain all alone,
even though I’m at a crowded cafe,
and it feels like sunrise,
even though it’s already mid-day,

my head feels like a ton of bricks,
trying to retrace my misstepped steps…

∆ Aaron La Lux ∆

author of

The Poetry Trilogy
The Holy Trilogy
The HH Trilogy

The City of Demonios

“Why are some people waiters,
and some people are waited on,
why are some people Haters,
and some people hated on?”

I was awaited on,
before they knew they were waiting,
pinch from dreams or so it seems,
because it appears the people are awaking,

I’ve awaken,
in some sort of dreaming,
and I’m trying to not let them get me,
but it seems they get everyone eventually,

preyed on by hungry demons,
Fallen Angels that haven’t found peace,
from the city of Los Angeles,
to the beaches in the East,

a feast,
I offer up my body for Death,
see only through the death of the physical,
can the Soul truly ascend,

ascend,
do not fear the Reaper,
friend,
let’s make them all Believers,

I see her,
like a nightmarish dream,
I love Her I hate her I have to have her,
she stares in my eyes and makes the Silence scream,

scream,
isn’t that a painting,
a dream,
isn’t that just waiting,

let’s not,
let our,
hopes only be hopes,

manifest,
all of this,
before Death ties His rope,

around your neck,
suffocation,
please let me free,
we need liberation,

but for now,
I’ll just take a glass of water,
I’m parched it’s a desert out here,
and I’m wondering if the trouble’s worth the bother,

“Waiter,
please a glass of water.”,
I turn to you after ordering a glass,
and say “Isn’t it ironic.”,

“Why are some people waiters,
and some people are waited on,
why are some people Haters,
and some people hated on?”…

∆ Aaron LA Lux ∆

Had dinner with my parents tonight,
this week was the first time I’ve ever seen them together in my life,

honestly,
and even though I left home at 14,
all of the blame,
can’t really be put on me,

because my parents had broken up,
since long before I was woken up,
separated for so long,
I often wondered if they were even ever together,

I brought them together for my birthday,
2016,
my father flew in from The States,
we all met in Thailand where my mom lives,

dinner was difficult,
my mom is losing here mind,
while she’s sitting there spilling her soul,
my dad just sits there and asks meaningless questions,

my mother sitting there saying how she has no money,
how she has no family other than us,
how she has no food on her feet,
and no real place to call home,

like I’m supposed to feel guilty for that,
like I don’t send her money all the time,
like I wasn’t in Thailand to visit her,
like I’m a man now so she has chosen to blame me,

like she’s chosen to blame every other man that’s ever been in her life,

how many husbands has she had,
six?

Seriously,
ridiculous,

what do you say to your mom,
when you think she’s a ****,
and I know that might sound like a terrible thing to say,
but it’s the truth and I refuse to censor myself,

my,
self,
doesn’t even feel like me anymore,
not even sure if I’m a human let alone a man,

man,
the Atomic Family is more like an Atomic Bomb,

what a mess we’ve made,
and all in the name of what,
no idea,
honestly,

well,
it’s all probably a simulation always,
at least that’s what Elon Musk says,
“There’s a 1 in billions chance that we are not living in a Simulated Reality.”

Makes me want to tell my parents,
that they are just part of my computer program,
but they’d probably call me crazy,
and then just disappear…

∆ Aaron LA Lux ∆

Standing Rock

The pipeline is the bloodline,
of an Empirical Two Headed Dragon,
The Divided States of America used to be united,
can someone please tell me what the heck happened,

Standing Rock just might be the last stand for anyone that’s still standin’,

Standing Rock,
is not a photo op,
it’s not a festival,
it’s Indians and Cops,

more correctly,
it’s Native Americans and Corporate Hitmen,
it’s the crossroads,
where environmental defense intersects with big business interests,

it’s getting intense,

water cannons and flash grenades,
mock democracy and a Trump presidency,
military disguised as cops,
and cops disguised as military,

as the original defenders of this land,
continue to make a stand,
at Standing Rock this is not a photo op,
this is indirect imperial tactics meets Direct Action,

highly ironic,
that I write this on Thanksgiving,
the day before Black Friday,
tell me what you do that’s worth livin’,

Quite fitting,
that I’m writing this on Thanksgiving,
a “holiday” in a way,
but really just a heist by villains disguised as pilgrims,

well then,
where does that leave us now,
several hundred years later,
at Standing Rock having a powwow,

how,
have we gotten here,
and how,
as so little changed we’re,

still in this sticky situation,
battling hearts that are as black as oil,
still ******* the blood out of Mother Earth,
still battling Two Headed Serpent Dragon as it coils,

the pipeline is the bloodline,
of an Empirical Two Headed Dragon,
The Divided States of America used to be united,
can someone please tell me what the heck happened,

Standing Rock just might be the last stand for anyone that’s still standin’.

Defendin’,
the Sacred,
with Love,
over Hatred.

Water Is Life.

∆ Aaron La Lux ∆

www.amazon.com/Aaron-La-Lux/e/B00ODPJAOK

Be Quick

I’m on the back of His Enduro,
through the alkaline dust of the desert,
we ride by the full moon’s light,
the three Pyramids of Giza casting perfectly measured silhouettes,

so dark they could be shadows,

and we both know time is of the essence,
so we are trying to Be Quick,

I’ve got a train to catch,
a one way ticket to Luxor,
but they say life is the journey not the destination,
so we’re always going even if we don’t always know where,

here,

on the back of this bike,
I hold on to Him for dear life,
as the back wheel kicks up the Sands of Time,
His bike obediently continuing into the night,

I don’t know where we are going,
but I know if I live to write about it I will,
because I am a writer and writing is what I do,
it’s my way of showing gratitude and being thankful,

He’s a writer too,
similar to me,
or maybe I’m similar to Him,
because He’s 20 years my senior,

used to live the Hollywood Life,
made films and got famous,
and now He's a non profit doctor,
helping those in need that are nameless,

I see my future in his eyes,
so when we stop atop a dune,
at a bedouin camp with the three pyramids on the moon lit horizon,
I ask Him one question,

“Are you happy?”.

He pauses,
and He answers,
with something poetically metaphorical like,
“Happiness is relative.”

And then,
He proceeds to tell me the story of his life...

He talks about Hollywood,
He talks about love and about searching,
He talks about how he gave it all up,
to come to these deserts and help those that need helping,

He reveals so much,
so much more than any of these words can translate,
and as our evening comes to an end,
I realize as amazing as our lives may be we are only men,

alone,
atop a dune in Giza,
overlooking the Great Pyramids,
trying to share knowledge without sounding like preachers,

He is Jesus,
at least as close to Jesus as I’ve ever met,
quite fitting considering He came from The City of Angels,
and I see in His eyes that for society he has wept,

and I want to stay there,
because I love Him,
I see his struggle,
and His moral dilemmas,

but I've got a train to catch,
and life waits for no man,
so we wrap up our conversation,
and travel back across those Egyptian sands,

and it is then,
that I realize,
that He is me,
in 20 years time,

He is me,
in 20 years,
and as amazing as his ways seem,
I wonder if He’s lonely and if every effort he's ever made was worth it,

and that is why I asked Him what I now ask You,

“Are you happy?”.

∆ Aaron LA Lux ∆

In The Pursuit of Happiness

Everywhere I go,
there are too many pillows,
and I’m not complaining I’m just saying,
it’s like I’m living inside some sort of reality show,

so far gone out of our minds into these experiences we go,

in the pursuit of happiness,
we catch the wave go with the flow and away we go,

so,
certain of nothing,
living,
the dream one nightmare at a time,

writing,
these words,
right after she’s left me,
like everything we experienced was just a dream,

or so it seems,

met amongst the sweat and steam,
of some thermal baths,
on the Buda side,
of Budapest,

bubbles whipped into a froth,
wandering but not lost,
feeling like a God,
gone but not forgot,

at this sacred sanctuary,
on the Buda side of Budapest,
I’m a runaway still on the run,
so sanctuaries like this are where I do rest,

in the pursuit of happiness,

some call it a challenge I call it a quest,

life is a lesson it is not a test,

losers say no while winners say yes,

Yes,

on the Buda side,
of Budapest,
this was the setting,
in which we met,

she was with her friend,
a lesbian from ******,
that’s an island in Greece,
for those that don’t know,

she happened to be a poet too,
so naturally we vibed well,
because when two or more poets get together,
it feels like we’re part of the artist cartel,

we got those emotions if you need them,
come on over and get your fix,
just a little motivation,
a rest stop a re-up on the road to happiness,

in the pursuit of happiness,

we have plenty of experiences,
we roll dice and take chances,
life itself is a gamble we all lose,
because nobody gets out of here alive,

I invited,
her and her friend to dinner,
they accepted so we met up,
a few hours later,

the plan was to go out to one of the ruins bars,
get some beers or whatever,
instead we ended up climbing a bridge,
and watching the lights of the city in all their grandeur,

fast forward,
we’re back at my place,
making love on a bed,
Baraka streaming from the projector screen,
onto the white wall between the floor and high ceiling,
melting reeling shaking grasping releasing,
feeling like two entire universes for the first time meeting,
she was coming I was going letting go at the same time holding,
it’s funny how sometimes a good grip can feel so freeing,
flying high lying down she’s riding me she’s coming now,
she’s Greek a Goddess call her Athena I mean this wow,
I’m surfing Her wave like Poseidon a titan live at the Apollo,
an all mighty Aphrodite laying down but not sleeping no Hypnos,

so high so fly,
feels like there’s wings coming outta my head,
she’s still on top of me so I turn her over on the bed,
to find a tattoo on her neck and here is what it read,

“Pursuit of Happiness”,

in words written in cursive,
this is beyond ironic,
this is cosmic this is honest,
this is a comet crashing into earth this is God meets Goddess,

on this,
earth,
we made love,
like some things still matter,

like,
something,
still,
mattered,

in this,
bed,
we made love,
like no things still matter,

like,
nothing,
still,
mattered,

as Baraka,
continued to play,
onto the tall white wall,
from the projector from which it projected,

and in that instant,
something mattered and nothing mattered,
everything mattered mad as a hatter,
free as a God in Greece in a moment perfectly captured,

as she lays here,
in this moment out of time,
an alchemist creating bliss from the pain,
painting the perfect picture,

this is more than a poem this is living scripture,

we are creating emotional paintings,
we are Gods and wherever we our is our Mt. Olympus,
as we travel on and write down our experiences,
so others can live through our words in a way that’s vicarious,

we carry this,
torch and stay on the course in the pursuit of happiness.

And everywhere we go,
there are too many pillows,
and I’m not complaining I’m just saying,
it’s like I’m living inside some sort of reality show,

so far gone out of our minds into these experiences we go,

in the pursuit of happiness,
we catch the wave go with the flow and away we go…

∆ Aaron LA Lux ∆

09/09/16

Author Bio:
www.amazon.com/Aaron-La-Lux/e/B00ODPJAOK

The King’s Conundrum

Every castle crumbles,
every rise has it’s fall,
every king eventually dies,
no matter how great the life is he lives,

and all the jewels that rest in his crown,
can’t be taken with him when he’s gone,
because everything in this material world that matters now,
will be worthless when Kingdom Comes,

he’s on his throne,
he’s the king of the hill,
but he feels all alone,
because the pyramid gets smaller the higher you go,

while everyone watches the throne,
some with respite and some with respect,
as the ultimate answers stay evasive,
but the ultimate question continues to beg…

As a king what will you leave here once you’ve gone?

What will be your legacy?

How will you be remembered?

What will be your gift to this world?

After the fall when it all falls down,
what will you leave for society other than an empty body?

After all,
you owe everything you have in this existence to this world,

and you have a lot,
you’ve accumulated more than one man could ever spend in a lifetime,
and a lifetime is exactly how much time you’ve got,
and time is running out faster every day tick tock tick tock,

it doesn’t matter how much treasure you’ve got,
you can’t take any of it with you,
and herein lies the fundamental question,
what will you do with all of your immeasurable treasures when you’re gone?

And this my dear friend,
is the king’s conundrum.

Because the more you have,
the more you lose,
the more you make,
the greater the divide with what you can take.

Because you can take nothing,
except for maybe a few memories,
so what will you choose to do with what you leave behind,
what do you want the people to think when they remember he?

He as in you,

honestly,
what are you going to do,
now that you see,
that the more you make the more you’ll lose…

Choose,
wisely great king,
for God,
and the people are both watching,

so what will you leave,
for future generations to view and use,
and that my dear friend is the ultimate question,
but it’s a question that ultimately can only be answered by you,

so seriously,
what will you do?

because every castle crumbles,
every rise has it’s fall,
every king eventually dies,
no matter how great the life is he lives,

and all the jewels that rest in his crown,
can’t be taken with him when he’s gone,
because everything in this material world that matters now,
will be worthless when Kingdom Comes,

he’s on his throne,
he’s the king of the hill,
but he feels all alone,
because the pyramid gets smaller the higher you go,

while everyone watches the throne,
some with respite and some with respect,
as the ultimate answers stay evasive,
but the ultimate question continues to beg…

As a king what will you leave here once you’ve gone?..

∆ Aaron LA Lux ∆

The Holy Trilogy Vol. 1; available worldwide

I,
have everything now,
except,
those smiling eyes,

this is,
an anonymous love letter I’ve forgotten your name,
because,
I find it’s better to just forget the truth and remember the lies,

I,
have everything now,
except,
those smiling eyes,

and that’s okay,
because I’ve been getting good at erasing memories lately,
like lovers all the best ones seem to eventually fade away,
and you can put all the blame on me honestly it’s totally okay,

I,
have everything now,
except,
for those smiling eyes,

I see you see,
that my reputation precedes me,
I’ll bet expectations were set even before we ever met,
yep that’s the truth and I don’t lie believe me,

see,
we are legends in the flesh immortal Gods that live in the infinite infinity infinitely,

I,
have everything now,
except,
for those smiling eyes…

∆ Aaron LA Lux ∆

The Holy Trilogy Vol. 1 by Aaron La Lux, available now:
https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B01N3QR3E4

I’ll never know why someone Loves me,
even if they tell me in their total truth,
it’s possible that even what they believe,
is not exactly totally true,

so I don’t question Love anymore,
I never ask a Lover if they Love me,
because honestly to me love is a verb,
it’s an action not a title,

when in Love,
or making Love,
or showing Love,
or being Love,
there is no time for questions,
why ruin bliss with curiousity,
why have to know why,
why not just accept and be,

see,

I’ll never know why someone loves me,
even if they tell me in their own total truth,
it’s possible that even what they believe,
is not exactly totally true,

through,
the Night Sky I fly,
on a flight from Athens to Cairo,
I have a date with the Pyramids,

was only in Athens for one night,
en route from Budapest,
and with all this traveling,
one might ask when do I rest,

yes,
good question,
a much better question,
than “Why does she love me?”,

Why does she love me?

I’d only just met her,
and we’d only just made love,
still she looks at me so deep,
that I swear to my soul it seems she speaks,

and I swear she’d leave,
not even pack a bag,
she would just runaway to the airport with me,
and fly away to whatever destination comes next,

in this case the Pyramids,
and I’d take her I really would,
because I’ve loved and lost enough to know,
that her Love for me is genuine forget the questions,

so I ask,
on the couch,
in that living room,
at that house in in Athens,

“Will you come with me to Egypt?”,

I pray She says yes,
and as I’m asking her that question in Athens,
on that layover to Cairo from Budapest,
her hands I’m graspin’ and my heart is hopin’,
I’m open,
as open as my invitation to her is,
and then She replies,
in words so plain and full of pain,

“I would love to come with you,
but I don’t have a passport.”

And then everything hits me instantly,
so many things become clear,
I see how wealthy I’ve become,
and I see my success through her despair,

there,
She is,
on that couch at her friends house,
with nowhere to go,

watching false idols on the internet,
fantasizing about people I’ve actually met,
and I realize in that moment,
that I’m as close asSshe’ll ever get to freedom,
I am what She wishes to be,
so of course She’d run away with me,
of course She’d explore the world and her dreams with me,
but she doesn’t even have a passport,

and I am at a loss for words,
for me She is just a layover,
no pun intended,
but I wrote it so I meant it,
and as amazing as she is,
she’s just a Greek girl,
an Athenian human being,
but not Athena and the days are over for the Byzantines,

so she’s stuck there,
in that city of Yesteryears,
flooded now with refugees,
while I’m about to catch a flight out of there,

and I want to say so much,
but sometimes there’s nothing to say,
sometimes there’s no more questions,
and all the answers are plain,

so I don’t ask a thing,
I just sit there with here and smoke,
I just bare witness to another girl’s empty dreams,
because dreams without reality are just hopes,

nope,

not going to question this,
I’m just going to write it all down,
as I fly south over the Mediterranean,
in time for a feast in Giza,

and I want to give here everything,
not just a passport but a path to freedom,
but I’m just a bad boy with a good heart,
so all I give her are these words in hopes she’ll read them,

Alexia,
I love you and I’m willing to be patient,
and when you if ever get your passport,
come find me for I’ll be here waiting,
and I can’t promise you I’ll be single,
in fact I can’t promise you a thing,
because an honest man makes no promises,
and the true embodiment of freedom wears no rings,

but I will be here,
and I will accept you in all your Midnight Lights,
and I won’t ask you any questions,
and I won’t lie to you and tell you everything’s going to be alright,

but I will accept you,
in all your Midnight Lights,
and we will just let what we don’t know rest,
and attribute those unknowns to the Mystery of Life,

and I,
I,
I,
I,

I’ll never know why someone loves me,
even if they tell me in their total truth,
it’s possible that even what they believe,
is not exactly totally true…

∆ Aaron LA Lux ∆

The Holy Trilogy Vol. 1; Masonic Psalms from Holy Lands
available worldwide 11/11/16
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01N3QR3E4

Hey,

how have you been?

I know,
sometimes Time can be tough,
but remember,
nothing’s permanent and this too shall pass,

we are only an idea of our own imagination of our Selves,

and I don't know if that leads to more questions or answers,
and I don’t know if that makes things better or worse,
but then again maybe there is no such thing as better or worse,
and maybe that’s the truth and maybe the truth is that sometimes the truth hurts…

Hey,

how have you been?

Tell me,
are you enjoying this miracle called Life,
in this body,
that you’re currently in?

I’m not sure you fully heard the question because I'm not sure you were actually listening,
so at the risk of sounding repetitive I’m going to go ahead and ask it again,

“Hey how have you been,
are you enjoying this miracle called Life in this body that you’re currently in?”.

And yeah I know you’re confused and think you might be a Lesbian,
or maybe an Asexual Extra-Terrestrial Multi-Dimensional Alien,
but hey that’s okay all the World’s a stage and we are all  Eccentric Thespians,
Oddity Prodigies Radical Remedies isn’t it ironic how sometimes the poison is the medicine?

So let the record spin and let the dance begin what hold on I beg your pardon,

I’m not sure you heard the reference because I not sure you were listening,
so at the risk of sounding repetitive I’m going to go ahead and say it again,

“all the World’s a stage and we are all  Eccentric Thespians,
Oddity Prodigies Radical Remedies isn’t it ironic how sometimes the poison is the medicine?”

Hey,

how have you been?

I thought about you today,
all day actually,

all the way from Budapest Castle,
through the Labyrinth to Matthias Church,
where I drank water which sprang from an Eternal Springs,
from the Fountain of Everlasting Youth I drenched my mouth to quench my occurring thirst.

I thought about you today,
from the thermal baths at Lukacs,
to right here where I’m writing this,
at the Basilica on the Turrets of the Fisherman’s Bastion,

and actually I have a lot of answers but I do have one question if you don’t mind me asking,

hey,

how have you been?

It seems what I’ve received from atop the turrets contemplating,
is that my attraction towards you is both affection and indifference,
affliction and obsession and independence and addiction,
and possession and freedom and rejection and acceptance,

and wait a second,

it is,
actually also the most beautiful creation in all of creation,

it is,
the self manifestation of perfection from chaos and misdirection,

which is,
what we are oh my look now to the sky because that's where we are headin’,

and things,
are coming out so fast now I think it’s about time for me to check in,

with you,

hey you,

hey,

how have you been?

You still give me the chills like the hottest Sun mixed with the coldest Winds,
which also describes the highest highs both literally and figuratively that I find myself in,
because what I write is the result of insight from the Most High that I then let out with my pen,
& also it seems where I write these lines is usually from places high it can’t all be a coincidence,
this feels all too real to try and even begin to attempt to pretend,
confident and confused at the same time like wanting to make Love with your best friend.

When,
will we be able to make Love unconditionally without any preconditions,
when can we just be without wanting to do,
like being at a Basilica in the petition position but not needing to be on any particular  mission,
can we please just land on foreign land for the sake of seeking refuge from stormy seas,
or simply to stop from drifting,
instead of landing on foreign land for the sake of spreading our own misdirected ideology,
or simply landing on land to start conquering?

When will we be,
able to just be without all the questioning and invasive investigations,
I mean seriously,
these people these days ask so many questions it’s beginning to feel like an Inquisition,

made a few more references there,
could you please write back and let me know when you get them?

And your interpretation of what they mean because honestly I didn't get all of them,
I just wrote the references I didn't even get them all when they were written.

Let me know when,
you stop fishing,
because I already know what and who I want,
and of course I’ve only got one question,

hey,

how have you been?

Listen,

there's a vacancy in my heart a spot on the charts and I'm wondering if you could fill it,
I’m tired you’re hired please love my rebellious heart into submission,
and I guess that’s what I’ve been trying to say the whole time,
but I'm a poet that over elaborates so again I got lost in all the added adjective descriptions,

caught up in the moment as the Sun sets over the Danube river,
casting this beautiful city of Budapest in a golden glow that ripples and glistens,
and I realize just how unbelievably beautiful this whole Globe is,
but honestly the whole world is only half as beautiful when i find you missin’,

see you seem so far away,
when you’re anywhere but here…

Here,

where I watch tourist take selfies as two lovers give each other a kiss,
from atop the turrets of Fisherman’s Bastion feeling like I'm starring in a movie,
while staring over the edge fighting back the undeniable urge to plummet into the abyss,
wondering if you feel the same undeniable way & wondering if I am to You what You are to Me,

a Light at the end of the tunnel a reason to live,
a Pleasure that makes all this pain worth it,
a dualist that's humbly and loyally at your service,
both wise and foolish and open to improvement and to You being His heart's tutelage.

The truth is I am in love with this idea of having us even though I know I might lose this.

In Love with everything we embody and that is why one last time before it's too late I’m asking,

hey,

how have you been?

∆ Aaron La Lux ∆

From The Holy Trilogy Volume 1;
available worldwide here:
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01N3QR3E4

Dear America,
what have you become,
so busy worried about where you’re going,
that you’ve forgotten where you’re from,

I am your begotten son,

and I love you,

I love you,
more than these wonderful words can say,
I love you but I don’t know what to do,
because I fear that you’ve gone astray,

like an abusive drunken Trump father,
or a used up distracted Hilary mother,

you seem so drunkenly enraged by greed,
engaged in a lustful want that you falsely believe is a need,

“Oh say can you see,
by the dawn’s early light”,
we bomb people we’ve never even seen before,
something must be wrong because nothing feels right,

why,
why am I scared of you,

maybe it’s your violent tendencies,
maybe it’s your egotistical ways,
maybe it’s how you’ve created all these enemies,
and now these enemies won’t just leave us alone and go away,

“Oh say,
can you see,
by the dawn’s early light”,
you are my parents and I look up to you,
I love to see the Statue of Liberty’s guiding light,

but honestly,
at this point I don’t know what to do,
I am your son,
and even after all you’ve put me through I still love you,

but I am absolutely terrified at what you’ve become,
what we’ve all become,
and even when I run far away to try and escape,
I realize we are family so no matter how far I run,

I am still an American,
because I am America’s Son,

come,
back home,
back to the times of apple pies peace and butterflies,
before,
the drones,
and satellites appeared ominously like shooting stars in the summer skies,

come,
inside,
let’s talk about life over home cooked pumpkin pie,

I’ve got some questions and I don’t mean to pry,

but why have we had to capitalize off destruction,
why do we still have war what is it’s real function,
why destroy when we can construct a constant connection,
a solid foundation with good intentions and clear instructions,

so we can finally heal and move forward as a family that properly functions!

Be a good husband,
be a good wife,
be a good person,
lead a good life,

look,
it’s not that complicated,
see all us children would forgive all your murderous mistakes,
if only you’d just take the first step and admit that you made them,

he served two tours in Iraq gave his all and lost his life for this country,
and all he got in return was that Arlington grave you gave him,

God please save him,

he was a good kid,
even though he killed,
he did it because his Uncle Sam told him to,
please don’t place him beneath us in Hell,

Uncle Sam didn’t know any better either,
and it seems his parents had raised him quite well,
but Uncle Sam’s not his brother’s keeper,
I am and I know my brothers well,
and when any of us lose any of our lives,
we only pray we leave with a story to tell,

because maybe we believe,
that when we leave this life we lead,
at least we leave the world a little bit better,
from sea to shining sea,

at least,
a little,
bit,
better.

Whatever,
what more do you want me to say,
I love you I am your son,
but I’m scared and that scared feeling won’t just go away,

“Oh say,
can you see,
by the dawn’s early light”,
I write by the light of the bright stars,
and through these words I’ve earned my stripes,

and since we’re on the subject when did the public,
go from stars and stripes to bars and fights?

Honestly America,

as much as I distrust and despise you I still put no one above you,
even though I’m ashamed of you for invading our privacy like an invasive enema,
I don’t even trust you anymore and the only One i used to trust was you,
you’re like a blemish on otherwise perfect skin like irritating eczema,

I am embarrassed,
of the ways in which you’ve behaved and all you’ve put us through,
but I am still your begotten son,
and after all you’ve put me through I still love you…

“Oh say can you see,
by the dawn’s early light”…

∆ Aaron La Lux ∆

Check out my new book now: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01N3QR3E4

Lights camera action,
who’s up next,
politician,
or dumbsh!t pundit?

Oh I see,
everybody’s an expert,
man these candidates have switched sides so many times,
watching them flip-flop this much makes my neck hurt!

Candidate’s wearing make-up,
if you ask me it’s all a cover-up,
blemishes on their records,
when’s enough actually enough,

on stages,
synthetic sages make up stories,
while the police keep stuffing us into cages,
and the politicians keep talking about reclaiming America’s lost glory.

America’s lost glory what glory,
the one about us bombing innocents or the one about slaves,
well if that’s the glory then it’s not lost,
because the US still bombs innocents and pays most people a slave wage.

It’s fckn depressing,
these pop-star presidents,
jockeying for position,
just for a chance at a White House residence.

On a stage,
it’s a sad charade,
all these bad actors,
pointing fingers trying to shift the blame,

laaaaaame!

All they do is talk different when in front of a mic,
but behind closed doors they all act the same,
different costumes different connotations maybe,
but really there’s no significant difference because there’s no significant change.

It’s an act a sham a show,
pop star presidents hip hop rock and roll,
Barack stars sing about change without any evidence,
if you ask me they’ve all gotta go,

and this election year is no better,
if anything it’s worse,
you’ve got Hillary Clinton AKA Barack Light,
and of course running is another Bush,
then there’s Donald Trump,
who’s legitimately probably the Anti-Christ,
he’s a racist sexist selfish sociopathic narcissist,
he doesn’t want to debate anything he just wants to fight.

But what about Bernie Sanders,
people ask, “Are you feeling the Bern?”,
I mean the guy’s a 74 year old career politician socialist,
he’s gonna try and take half of everything I earn.

Sure,
I’d vote for him I guess,
outta desperation only,
because maybe it’d take someone that extreme to get us outta this mess,
but honestly he’s a bumble bee,
poking at the hornet’s nest,
I’d bet if he becomes a real threat to the one Corporate Establishent want’s to elect,
that the speech where he accepts ends with one of his last breaths.

Yup.

America the beautiful,
when’d you become such a bully,
you used to be my best friend,
but now you act like you don’t even know me,
you’re blood lust is revolting,
why’s your answer to everything violence,
and how can you say you speak for the people,
when most of the people are so fed up they just shut up and stay silent,

and even if we do get out and vote,
these days our votes aren’t even counted what gives,
what you think it’s just a coincidence,
that almost every state Hilary won was accused of being rigged?

I feel sick.

This political pile of tricks politics seems like a pile of ****t,
and the media’s forcing it down our throat,
I mean really what are we supposed to do,
when those that feel outcasted can’t even get the system to count their cast votes.

So I take notes.

And I write.

I write,
all of this with typing hands and a shaking head,
because I want a leader I can truly trust and believe in,
instead of some actor that can’t be trusted no matter what they’ve said.

Red,
state,
blue,
state,
red,
fish,
blue,
fish,

I’m not a Jew,
I’m only half so I’m Jew-ish,
and I’m not trying to be rude,
or to sound too prudish,
it’s just,
the history of half my people,
is filled with those that want to ***** us,
so the bait and switch poli-tricks these politicians politic,
well they’re Grand Old Party is nothing new to us.

Who to trust,
who to trust,
we’re tired of feeling like Lewinsky,
giving oral to the Oval Office and getting nothing back but fckt.

Fck.

When is enough enough,
no is supposed to mean no,
but we get it no **** on the ****** tube,
***; Slave & Master we’re all Lady Liberty’s ******* so on with the show!

Lights camera action,
who’s up next,
politician,
or dumbsh!t pundit?

Oh I see,
everybody’s an expert,
man these candidates have switched sides so many times,
watching them flip-flop this much makes my neck hurt.

Candidate’s wearing make-up,
if you ask me it’s all a cover-up,
blemishes on their records,
when’s enough actually enough?

∆ Aaron La Lux ∆

The Holy Trilogy Vol. 1; 11/11/16
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01N3QR3E4

Welcome To Egypt


You want to know what a military dictator ship is?

Checkpoints at every crossing,
police disrespecting the citizens,
guns gripped tightly in the hands of teenagers,
bleached white suits with fake brass stars.

Welcome to Egypt.

You want to know what becomes of fallen empires?

Dusty streets of broken dreams and failed endeavors,
uptight men in loose jellabiyas hawking Chinese made junk,
descendants of kings catering to the whims of ignorant tourist,
and a once pristine river now so ***** it’s dangerous to swim in.

Welcome to Egypt.

You want to know what irony is?

Here denial is a double entendre,
it’s a river and a state of mind,
where the people can’t see they are biting,
the very hand that feeds them.

Welcome to Egypt.

You want to know what it’s really like here?

Well I was just harassed today,
accused by the police of trying to pray,
because in Egypt it is illegal to pray or even meditate,
I had to threaten to call the US Embassy before I was allowed to go on my way.

Welcome to Egypt.

You want to know what the real atrocity is?

The States gives this country over a billion dollars a year,
but the people that really need the money don’t see a single pound,
the money is used to further oppress the people,
and anyone that tries to stand up for their rights is beaten down.

Welcome to Egypt.

You want to know what happened to democracy?

The Muslim Brotherhood won the election,
then the military staged a coup,
kicked out the democratically elected government,
and assassinated anyone that dared to speak the truth.

Welcome to Egypt.

You want to know what the real Egypt is about?

Come witness the horror for yourself,
mothers dying in doorways children eternally crying,
horses beaten to death in 106˚ heat,
then left for dead no burial for the dying.

Welcome to Egypt.

You want to know what equality is here?

What equality woman have to cover everything up,
wearing all black in a torturing heat,
and if I man tries to hold a woman’s hand,
then they both get rounded up by the Moral Police.

Welcome to Egypt.

You want to know how bad it really is?

People die every day on boats trying to escape,
desperately attempting to flee this god forsaken country,
what a travesty and shame it all is,
how poor this country’s become that was once so wealthy.

Welcome to Egypt.

You want to know the truth?

The oppression is so bad in Egypt,
that anyone that says anything about that,
can disappear courtesy of the secret police,
seriously it happened to my dear friends dad.

Welcome to Egypt.

You want to know what?

Luckily I am not Egyptian,
so I can escape this country that’s become a prison,
leaving in a few hours and to anyone that’s considering a visit,
I’m leaving behind this welcome warning here that I’ve written.

Welcome to Egypt.

∆ Aaron La Lux ∆

The Holy Trilogy Vol. 1 available worldwide 11/11/16

She left me,
dancing as she disappeared under the faded street lights,
I stood there,
watching shirtless as she faded in the street’s night,

I’m sensing a pattern,
one I desperately deserve,
I fall in love and hit the ground,
my heart landing on the curve,

I’m trying to become a better man,
I don’t want to feel cliche,
I don’t want to try and ******,
every girl that comes my way,

I love women,
and I respect them,
and if I respect them,
I should also respect their wishes,

it’s my responsibility,
just as much as it is hers,
to exercise self control,
especially when arousal occurs,

sure,
she is **** as the hottest a Goddess could ever be,
and sure,
I am ***** as the must turned on man could ever me,

but I am better than the physical desires that pulsate though my body,

I’m trying to become a better man,
I don’t want to feel cliche,
I don’t want to try and ******,
every girl that comes my way,

gave two massages just today,

the first one to a girl that has a boyfriend,
she told me she was sick of feeling objectified,
she just wanted some attention,
without being looked at like an object by every guy,

so I gave her a massage and even reached her inner thighs,

but I did not cross that thin lustful line,

I respect her too much,
to try and take advantage of her lowered defenses,
I will not be like almost every other man,
and try and get into almost every girls *******,

I love her so much more than ***,
and I crave moments alone where we can be intimate,
but I’m on another level elevated from the simple man,
I am in love the soul of the woman not just what’s inside her pants,

and so after the massage was done,
I put her clothes back on,
as respectfully as I’d taken them off,
and she thanked me with her blessing,

saying she’d see me tomorrow,
and that she appreciated me not trying to get in her pants,
and her grateful compliment was better than any ***,
well not any but still better than *** followed by abandonment,

and then she went,
and then I saw,
a girl that shared the same birthday was me,
who was/is an artist as well,

I invited her up to my room,
she initially was hesitant,
I told her I understood her skepticism,
she told me she was a feminist,

I told her my last girlfriend’s best friend was a lesbian,

soon enough though she was in my room where my massage commenced,

with her too I was controlled,
even though I took off her clothes,
and massaged most of her body thoroughly,
I avoided that red line that lies just before the danger zone,

coconut oil jasmine and ylang ylang,
helped smooth out all her tension,
and I told her if anything I was doing hurt her,
to please bring it to my attention,

I was just grateful,
to be able to be intimate,
with a girl who I found attractive,
and who may well have been my artistic equivalent,

an emotional exhibitionist both infinitely limitless and honestly uninhibited,

and so it went,
until we were lying in each others auras,
I guess sometimes you have to spend it all,
in order to attain the ultimate fortune,

to be able to share space and time with someone without any wanting,

one thing I can say is that moment felt like forever and a day in the best way,

though soon she was going,
I wanted to debate and ask her to stay,
but I promised not to protest if she was being honest,
so instead I helped her get her clothes back on her lengthy frame,

walked her down the well polished wooden stair case,
and to my hotel’s golden spiked front gate,
then I walked her down the long driveway,
to where the private road meets the main roadway,

and then she left me,
dancing as she disappeared under the faded street lights,
I stood there,
watching shirtless as she faded in the street’s night,

I’m sensing a pattern,
one I desperately deserve,
I fall in love and hit the ground,
my heart landing on the curve,

I’m trying to become a better man,
I don’t want to feel cliche,
I don’t want to try and ******,
every girl that comes my way…

∆ Aaron LA Lux ∆

The Great Pyramid

Scared to Death,
which makes sense,
nowhere to go but up,
from the top of The Great Pyramid,

no pictures here,
so free you can’t capture it,
white owls and black cats,
call me Alexandria,

honest what,
do you do when,
all of the wisdom,
gets spoken but people don’t listen.

Listen.

I’m at the top of the pyramid,
and I’m scared to death,
not scared of death,
but scared to death,

and that’s exactly what a paradox is,

Isis,
and Horus,
light the,
menorahs,

bless all,
our children,
the need,
more than hope when,
their families are dying,
and it’s not enough to just be trying,
need more than hope,
need to do more than try,
when you can walk no higher,
that is when it’s time to fly.

Scared to Death,
which makes sense,
nowhere to go but up,
from the top of The Great Pyramid.

Please God,
we are,
the Children of Egypt,

we created the pyramids,
and our pyramids created this,

so don’t expect,
a symphony of sympathy from us kids,
even if we,
we unconditionally accept it,

Oh God,
please don’t neglect,
can’t you see we did this all for you,
and all we ask for in return is your acceptance and respect,

Oh God,
I’m scared to death,
I’m stressed and I’m tense,
please allow me to relax,

and please,
when I reach your gates,
I pray you let me pass,

I am just a child of You,
and we are family especially in death,

yes,

I do believe the Light will prevail,
even if it hasn’t happened in this generation yet,
and I’m excited and I’m ready all my bags are packed,
and I’m climb up the steps to the top of The Great Pyramid,

and I’ll come when you call,
even when I’m scared to death…

∆ Aaron LA Lux ∆

The Holy Trilogy Vol. 1; available worldwide: 11/11/16

the Sun’s about to set,
I can hear Jaguars in the uncomfortably near distance,
and I’m thinking they can come and get me I'm ready,
because Death by Jaguar wouldn’t be a bad way to go in this instance,

It would be glorious,
the kind of death that I would not protest,
I’m ready for my glory “Jaguar Spirit come and get me!”,
lead me to the Underworld and introduce me to this infamous character called Death,

yes,

I’m ready to go,
but apparently God isn’t quite ready for me yet,

see this isn't my first subconscious attempt,
at expediting my inevitable destiny with Death.

Still as much as I beg,
and as lost as I feel,
I find my way out of the jungle,
and stumble upon a Guatamalan encampment where I’m fed a good meal,

oh well,
maybe next time I shall be food for a Jaguar,
and then through my sacrifice I’ll become a legend,
and my story will get told and my poems read around future camp fires,

The Tale of The Poet Who Took Death by Jaguar,
as traumatic as it sounds it honestly wasn’t a bad way to go,
or so he had thought while finding himself lost,
alone with no one but that Jaguar deep in the Guatemalan jungle…

∆ Aaron La Lux ∆

Metropolitana di San Pietro

“If the Heaven’s are as beautiful,
as they are portrayed here in these paintings,
upon the ceiling of this cathedral,
in this city known as Bologna,
then I pray I go to Heaven,
I pray Heaven’s Angelic Escorts,
descend from there Heavenly Nest,
and carry me Home upon their white wings.”,

which would be fitting since I’m in a place of worship,  
at Cattedrale Metropolitana di San Pietro in Bologna,
feeling like Saint Peter not a preacher but a leader with words,
willing to be crucified and die in the name of God,
if it will help skeptics become believers,
seCattedralee even though I believe,
that every place is a place of worship,
most people tread upon earthly desires without any respect,

and I want to vent but I won’t get into all that now,
this is not the time or place,
this is a time and a place for prayers to be sent,
and I won’t let wants get in the way of prayers,

praying,

for world peace of course because what other prayer is as important,
people have been praying for peace in a different time in this same place for centuries,
since at least 1028 A.D. people have knelt before God at this cathedral,
I doubt I’m the first poet to have His prayers echoed across these marble walls,

“Oh God,
please help those that are hurting,
please help those that are lost find their way,
please heal this conditioned hatred with unconditional love.”

80 more were just murdered,
in The Nice Massacre just today July 14th, 2016,
mowed down by a psychopath in a 20 ton cargo truck,
in acts this atrocious we are lost at who to blame,

so I’m praying praying for the murdered and their families,
I’m praying for the murderer and his family too,
because in atrocities such as this,
all involved are victims even the culprits,

at the pulpit I pray,

“Oh God,
I’m both disheartened and inspired by humanity,
I see so many wonderful creations,
and so much horrible destruction.”

I have a #1 best selling book out right now,
but I honest don’t know if it even matters,
because what good are the most healing words,
if most of those hurting don’t read them,
I’m doing the best I can,
I give away all literary profits to charity,
but when it comes to giving to charity,
you can give everything you have and it’s still not enough,

so I try and give globally and act locally,
I smile and try and be kind and considerate to everyone I meet,
but even those who are most faithful can begin to become doubtful,
when they are nice to those around them but most people respond by being mean,

I mean it’s hard to stay faithful especially when everyone heeds help,
even myself what’s wealth when it comes with doldrums,
see rich and poor are monetarily very different,
but one thing they have in common is they’re both hurting just in different ways,

so I pray,

“Oh God,
please show me a sign because all I see when I walk down this street,
is sins that are alive and striving and blessings that seem to be slowly dying,
1 smile for every 10 frowns I know because I count the faces of even those I don’t meet.”,

even I have a tear in my eye God,
but I just blame it on the cold morning winds,
it seems nothing’s changed even though I’m now famous,
it’s like I’ve got all the ammo in the world but don’t know where to aim it,

and that is why I’m praying,

“Oh God,
allow your angels to carry me Home,
upon golden wings of loving Light,
I swear to You I’m ready to go,
ready when You are there is no need to keep writing,
it all feels in vain anyways because no matter what we say people keep killing,
I mean what good is writing the signs when those that need them most don’t read them,
what good are hopeful promises that people make when those that make them don’t keep them?”,

“See even though it all feels in vain still I will continue to faithfully,
write until You take me home,
I continue to write wherever I be ,
which currently is between massive twin pillars of marvelous marble,

at this place of worship,
entitled the Cattedrale Metropolitana di San Pietro,
I write words of hope and wisdom,
in the hopes that the masses will listen,

whether at a beautiful cathedral,
or on worn streets either way I write to warn worn souls,
so hopefully You can reach the people ,
through these prayers in the form of these verses,

from ghettos and prisons to palaces and churches,
I continue to faithfully write,
as I do this very moment at this cathedral,
on this day the 15th of July 2016 A.D. in this present moment of time,

“ Oh God if the Heaven’s are as beautiful,
as they are portrayed here in these paintings,
upon the ceiling of this cathedral,
in this city known as Bologna,
then I pray I go to Heaven,
I pray Heaven’s Angelic Escorts,
descend from there Heavenly Nest,
and carry me Home upon their white wings...

∆ Aaron La Lux ∆

God Exists

The world has a funny way of reminding us,

God exists.

Sometimes I forget,
the freedoms I have as an American,
and I take these freedoms,
for granted,

but then,
the World reminds me,
and I remember,
that God exists.

God exists,

I see His Light’s reflection,
in almost everyone,
from the lowest slave,
to the highest pharaoh,

God exists.

For example,

I was on the train,
to Luxor from Cairo,
Aaron Lux headed to Luxor,
it only makes sense,

on the train I met an Egyptian man,
and I took this as divine intervention because I don’t believe in coincidences,
he worked/works for the United Nations,
as an assistant for economic development,

his English was perfect,
better than most Americans I know,
and we talked on that train ride,
to Luxor from Cairo,

once we arrived in Luxor,
we both parted ways,
but we made a plan,
to meet up the next day,

and we did and we went,
to dinner I brought a random Japanese girl,
we ate camel on a rooftop,
overlooking the Luxor Temple,

in the distance,

the lights of The Valley of The Kings,
reflected on caves of tombs such as King Tut’s you know what,
sometimes seeing death reminds me of being life,
and being life reminds me that God exists omnipresent in all things.

God exists.

We talked,
on that rooftop overlooking Luxor Temple,
we talked about philosophy and religion and politics,
and also about some new stuff,

such as the Arab Spring,
and each other’s family,
I told hime I was trying to reunite my parents in Thailand,
because of them together in this lifetime I have not a single memory,

and I’d like to see my parents together at least once,
before one of us three dies,
because you don’t get a second chance,
to live this single life,

I,

asked him about his parents,
he said his father had just been abducted,
by the Egyptian Secret Police,
see that’s what you call Boy Interrupted,

but this isn’t a cinema,
this a real life drama,
and I saw this young man of maybe 22 years old,
had had to grow up so quickly because of such adult sized problems,

he said he didn’t know where his father was,
he said the police had taken him just a week ago,
because his father was on the wrong side of democracy,
I guess that’s just how it goes,

see his father was part of The Muslim Brotherhood,
and had supported the Arab Spring,
which in turn had supported President Morsi,
who was elected democratically,

but old habits die hard,
and the Egyptians know that better than anybody,
not much has changed there’s still pharaohs and slaves,
this country is still ran by an aggressive military,

he doesn’t even know where his father is,
or if he’s even dead or alive,
but hopefully he doesn’t end up like Giulio Regeni,
found in a ditch with an X carved in his forehead and gouged eyes,

I,

realize,
then that I know nothing about “struggle”,
I realize then that the 1st world has nothing to complain about,
it is in that moment that reality popped my ignorant idealistical bubble,

I know nothing about trouble,
I come from a country where people complain about everything,
we get upset because a traffic light takes to long or a waiter screws up our order,
we feel depressed about nothing but we know nothing about real struggle or pain,

I will never again complain,
about being an American,
I mean my God this kid had his father abducted,
and he might never see him again,

God blessed it feels so good to be from a country with real freedoms God Bless America,

and I’m saddened and grateful at the same time,
I’m saddened because no kid should have his father taken,
I’m grateful because I was born in America so I’m entitled to amazing freedoms,
and I believe in the American Dream still wide awake in a country that feels Forsaken,

but there's no Sutherland,
in the original Empirical Motherland,
just brutal reminders resurrected like Jesus on Easter,
or King Tut's curse from Luxor's sands,

I am,
blessed to have freedoms and others don’t have,
simply because I was born as an American,
and I thank God for that fortuitous fact,

The world has a funny way of reminding us,

God exists.

sometimes I forget,
the freedoms I have as an American,
and I take these freedoms,
for granted,

but then,
the World reminds me,
and I remember,
that God exists.

God exists,

I see His Light’s reflection,
in almost everyone,
from the lowest slave,
to the highest pharaoh,

God exists.

∆ Aaron LA Lux ∆

Lost in the zone,
found my home,
here where the heart is,
all of us are artist,
we are what is,
flashy as club lights,
do some good tonight,
responsible for,
the betterment of,
everything love,
Love,
I love you,
Love,
love our world,
love this club,
love this love,
love Will’s pearls,
sure
we are,
whatever you want to call us,
sure,
I am,
the poet for this generation,

illuminating our dark hearts,
with infinite interpretations,

destination,
here,
where everything is an offering,
need a new language,
because this one’s too frustrating,
a rush crazy,
can’t believe we made it,
to the top of the top,
got,
everything I ever envisioned,
World War 3,
or Wold Wide Peace,
what it’s going to be is your decision,

in this,
Matrix we made it,
saying,
we are energy that’s infinite,

we are,
all of,
everything,
in this club of love,

let’s get together,
up to get down,
or down to get up,
either way around,

it doesn’t matter,
lights like stereotypes shatter,
all preconceived notions,
of what really matters,

life is,
what we write with,
a life that’s,
a trip like,
the lights that flash,
past,
back,
in this club,
where we light everything,
and get high off the love.

∆ Aaron LA Lux ∆

On a trip,
to Thailand,
from Egypt,
to an island,

had a layover in Dubai,
so I decided to visit a friend,
a beautiful traveler such as myself,
in Dubai the Hyatt was her residence,

I got off my flight,
and cleared customs,
took the Metro to Palm Deira,
then emerged into the thick Emirates air,

felt like I’d emerged into a tide pool,
the air was damp and salty,
as if I’d submerged my whole body,
into summer sun heated waters,

walked a long short walk to the hotel,
and entered the oversized lobby,
Dubai lives off of air conditioning,
and the climate control was welcoming,

my friend came down to meet me,
dressed as beautiful as ever,
a flight attendant she was very attentive,
we hugged and she invited me to the rooftop pool,

on the rooftop I changed into my swimming trunks,
because even though it was just I layover,
I bring my trunks with me everywhere,
because you never know when you’re gonna swim,

she stayed poolside,
gazed at me apparently amused,
after a quick dip I emerged refreshed,
toweled off and we talked,

she asked me why I write,
she asked me what my goal was,
I told her I didn’t know why I write,
or really what my goal was,

she pressed on,
and insisted there must be a reason,
so I answered her question,
with the following reasoning,

“I guess I write,
so that our collective humanity,
has some sort of documentation,
of our emotional history.
But I don’t have a goal,
and I am not flattered when people compliment my work,
because I don’t really consider my writings mine,
I consider them the world’s.
So when some says my writing saved their life,
I feel awkward because God wrote it not me,
still I say thank you because I don’t know what else to say.
The books I’ve written are bigger than me,
millions of people have read the poems I’ve penned,
but most people that that have read my poems,
wouldn’t recognize me on the street if they walked past me,
see it’s not me they know it’s the writing I’ve written,
which means readers think they know me,
but they don’t know me at all.”

There’s a moment of silence,
on that rooftop,
all the lights of Dubai,
reflecting in her dark molasses eyes,

and I ask this,

“Do you ever feel trapped?”

She seems a bit perplexed by the question.

“What do you mean?”

“I mean,
here you are,
in The Emirates.
You are constantly on call for an airline,
you could be called to go any minute,
so you’re in a constant state of defense.
Plus,
this whether,
I mean,
it’s unbearably hot here,
and people here are completely dependent on A/C,
plus there are cameras everywhere always watching,
and to open almost any door here you need a key,

it seems there’s so much security that nothing and no one is free.”

“No I don’t feel trapped.”

Her answer comes too fast,
as if she doesn’t want to take the time to think about it,
and speaking of time,
my flight to Thailand is quickly approaching.

I change out of my shorts,
put my ‘normal’ clothes back on,
khaki shorts and navy shirt,
so that I can cruise through without being bothered,

but I am bothered,
because I can’t even touch her,
this is Dubai and despite the pretty lights,
this place is not Liberal it’s Conservative Islam,

and everything is forbidden.

We make our way across the rooftop poolside,
walking on plastic grass under canvas canopies,
we get to the outside door she slides her plastic key card,
and we enter back into the climate controlled insides,

we reach the elevator,
she taps her key card again,
the elevator opens,
and we start to descend,

inside the lift I can’t help myself,
she’s too attractive,
so I try to place a kiss on her shoulder,
she pulls away.

“Aaron no!”

“What?”

“We can’t,
not here,
I can get in trouble,
seriously.”

She nods discretely to the close captioned camera,
recording our every movement in the corner,
I guess the only thing we can exchange here is glances,
the system still hasn’t found a way to stop us from making eye contact,

and eye contact is the only contact we’re allowed to make,
everything else is forbidden,
heck they’d probably even outlaw looks if they could,
the elevator opens,

we’re back in the lobby,
she offers to walk me to the metro,
I obviously accept her offer,
I would accept any offer she ever gave me,

We emerge back into that thick Emirate air,
that damp and salty tide pool,
back into that traffic and incessant noise,
back into the smell of the fruits of the sea,

I ask her why it smells so much like fish out there,
she tells me there’s a fish market across the street,
she tells me the Pakistanis shove fish in her face during the say,
and have absolutely no respect for personal space.

we reach the doors of the metro station,
already we can feel the cool artificial A/C breeze,
and I’m again reminded how fake this city is,
fake people fake air fake grass fake plastic trees,

seems she’s the only thing real here,
and we are about to say goodbye,
we hug quickly before we depart,
don’t want to catch the attention of the camera’s eye,

she waives goodbye,
as I descend back down the escalator,
I want to tell her that I don’t like goodbye waives,
because that’s exactly what I saw before I lost my sister,

in other words the last time I ever saw my little sister,
was when she waived goodbye to me,
before she drowned in the fish pond,
actually that’s the only memory I have of my sister,

but that’s another story for another day,
that’s a different trip entirely,
that’s something that happened long ago,
something that now’s a distant memory,

anyways that’s why I wanted to tell the girl in Dubai,
“Please don’t waive goodbye,
because that makes me worried,
that we’ll never see each other again.”,

but it was too late,
the hands of time had already pushed us away,
the escalator was already creating too much space between us,
I guess I can hope that we’ll see each other again in another time and place,

but for now,

I’m on a trip,
to Thailand,
from Egypt,
to an Island,

and the planes coming,
and it’s almost time to board,
and you can’t go back to a passed moment,
because the only constant is change and the only direction is forward,

so be forewarned,
if you love someone tell them right then,
because even when things are just beginning,
everything and every one is only a moment from the very end…

∆ Aaron LA Lux ∆