Gettin’ sh!t on like I’m The Villian,
got this queasy feeling on the line reeling,
coming undone at the same time wound up and spun,
I’m done playing but stuck at the table with The Dealer still dealing,

want to throw myself up out of myself,
can escape every position except the one I’m in,
can’t escape yourself if knowledge is wealth,
then I’m loaded & still spending my winnings,

got Karma Credit but I’m morally cash poor,
because I just fckt my girlfriend as if she was a whore,
and I feel terrible or rather horrible about it,
because i think I’m infected by what neglect did without a cure,

no one is pure,
at least I’m not that’s for sure,
I'm tainted with devils in my head painted with what I spilled I’m red,
sick with the sort of illness that can't easily be cured,

in fact got a bad case of the blues,
but instead of strumming a guitar I’m taking things too far,
cut her so bad with my fingernails,
that I fear it might leave a few scars,

tied her up so tight,
that her wrists turned purple,
see she’s attracted to bad boys,
and I warned her that that’s the type of attraction that can hurt you,

little girl shouldn’t be out past her curfew,
nothing good ever happens past midnight,
but we’re both running from something,
both stand outs in the in crowd still something doesn’t sit right,

I’m uncomfortable,
because I think maybe all humans are disgusting,
maybe we just cause each other pain and trash the earth’s surface,
maybe we deserve to feel guilty & that’s why we are all fcking distrusting,

maybe I’m gonna fckn kill myself,
but this is a card game so then again maybe I’m bluffing,
maybe everything’s going to be alright,
maybe I’m being uptight for nothing,

but I’ll tell you what I feel like the butt of my own joke,
but I don’t give a fck so instead of changing I’m just shrugging,
mean mugging every person I pass suspicious of every bloke,
because these days crime pays and everyone’s always up to something,

and I just want to get ghost,
but I can’t and I guess that’s the way it goes,
so I’m sittin’ in the uncomfortable position,
of being both a role model as well as a criminal,

Gettin’ sh!t on like I’m The Villian,
got this queasy feeling on the line reeling,
coming undone at the same time wound up and spun,
I’m done playing but stuck at the table with The Dealer still dealing…

∆ LaLux ∆
Bought a painting of Jaden Smith,
now wait before you diss,
give me a second to explain,
there’s a story that goes along with it,

see he had a show in LA,
and of course it was on the 7th,
3rd show of the tour,
and the tour was called Vision,

I hadn’t planned to go,
didn’t even know about the show,
until my brother Alpha told me about it,
and the cards aligned in a row,

see a few days before,
I’d backed my car into a wall,
and I had to take it to East LA,
to get it fixed in other words resolved,

now it just so happened,
that the day I took it to get fixed,
was the same day as Jaden’s show,
now that’s some Cosmicness,

see the show was downtown,
and I usually don’t go east of the 405,
but this time I did to get my car fixed,
and I asked a friend to pick me up because I couldn’t drive,

so she picked me up,
and then my other friend told me of an art show,
at a place called The Brewery,
and man how I love art shows,

so after dropping off the car,
and went to The Brewery,
where I bought some art,
because I like to collect future history,

now the girl that had picked me up,
was having a rough day,
because her brother had died 6 months earlier,
and today was his birthday,

so she had to leave,
and go to the beach,
and I stayed behind,
to let her have some peace,

and as it so happened,
there was another anniversary at a gallery called The Hive,
I told you the cards were in a row,
and of course the stars were aligned,

so I went to the next art gallery,
got a ride there from a beautiful Polish chic,
bought some more art at there as well,
I guess I am what a Collector is,

then it just so happened,
that I was walking distance from Jaden’s show,
so I walked through downtown,
until I arrived at The Novo,

now I didn’t have a ticket,
and the show as sold out,
but I found a side door,
and it opened right up,

I went inside,
and got with the vibes,
man that kid Jaden,
knows how to get the crowd hyped,

during the show,
I kept seeing someone in the front row,
try to hand Jaden a painting,
a painting of himself,

after the show,
I was thrown Jaden’s yellow bandana,
then I exited outside,
and away from the arena,

when I got to the exit,
I saw the kid with the painting,
it had Jaden and Willow’s signature,
and as I said before I collect paintings,

so I bought it right then and there,
blame synchronicities,
so it’s not so much I seek out art,
as art comes to me,

all part of the vision,
of starting the Art Center in New Zealand,
where we can feel safe and socialize,
and remember what it was like when we still had feelings,

and all that I see now,
in this painting I have,
of Jaden Smith,
dressed as Batman,

bought a painting of Jaden Smith,
now wait before you diss,
give me a second to explain,
there’s a story that goes along with it…

∆ LaLux ∆

The new book is 100% FREE here: www.scribd.com/document/388173677
You were just a dream,
I wasn’t allowed to keep,
like any unknown the odds were always 50/50.
but I knew the risk when I took that leap,

& it's not your fault nor is it mine,
it's just The Fault In Our Stars shout out to John Green,
Blame It On The Rain feeling as silly as Milli Vanilli,
feeling like everything's fake like you're only a screen,

& maybe that's why I feel so detached,
& why when you spill your heart out I don't say a thing,
you overreact & I don't even react,
because like they say life is but a dream,

though to be fair I'd say it's more of a nightmare,
because we get to see it all but can't keep a thing,
sleepwalking through this waking life,
where the loudest noises are mute & the silence screams,

& the truth is you seemed so lucid,
that I felt stupid for not being able keep you here,
& I'm not making excuses but the truth is,
I choose to lose everything including you that I hold dear,

which makes sense since you were just a dream,
that I wasn’t allowed to keep,
like any unknown the odds were always 50/50,
but I knew the risk when I took that leap...

∆ Aaron La Lux ∆

new book 100% free here: www.scribd.com/document/388173677
Aaron LaLux Sep 8
Mac Miller’s death wasn’t an Overdose,
it was a Suicide,
it was the path that he chose that’s the way it goes,
when you’re chewed inside,

when you’ve got those demons,
and even beautiful music doesn’t exercise them,
we all gotta go sooner or later,
so Mac at 26 is tragic but not surprising,

wish he’d held out for one more year,
then he could’ve gotten in the Forever 27 Club,
joined the likes of Hendrix Morrison and Joplin,
but anyways whatever it’s still all love,

even though,
it hurts so bad,
especially since I’m writing this,
to Mac’s Swimming soundtrack,

13 songs on Mac’s last album,
and the last track’s ‘So It Goes’,
and ‘So It Goes’,
is playing on a record in Mac’s final post,

one moment we’re living one moment we get ghost,
and that makes me think of Jaden,
who’s last track was Ghost,
oh God Jaden no don’t start fadin’,

you’re it man,
you’re the one,
please push past the darkness of the pain,
and shine like the All Seeing Sun,

you’re our last hope like Obi-Wan Kenobi,
so don’t shut your eyes Young Jedi,
you’ve got the torch now so let it burn bright,
because the only thing that doesn’t wait is time,

time doesn’t give a fck about clocks,
until they stop,
she puts me together when I’m out of order,
perfect,

gives me the shivers how the Lord deliver’s,
and I don’t even read psalms,
but I swear to God it was all written,
that’s why even in the chaos I’m calm,

nothing’s GO:OD in the AM,
when you’re not feeling The Divine Feminine,
nauseous everyone feels toxic and obnoxious,
you're conscious that the poison feels like medicine,

resurrected just to be dead again,

it’s scary or rather haunting how Mac’s last video,
show’d him trapped in a coffin,
with a message that read Memento Mori,
you might win some but you just lost one,

shout out to Lauryn Hill,
she lost her mind but didn’t lose her life,
see no matter how difficult things get,
you win no matter what as long as you stay alive,

and it hurts so bad that we lost him,
that even I right now feel dead inside,
better take care out there and beware,
Self Care's only effective with friends to stand by,

damn I,
want to find a way to make everything alright,
want to find a way to bring back Mac,
gone forever to that Castle in The Sky,

and I just wish I could’ve said one last word to him,
and it hurts so bad I want to cry,
see Mac Miller’s death wasn’t an Overdose,
it was a Suicide,

so if you’re feeling hurt and depressed,
find someone to get that sh!t off your chest,
because you’re loved whether you know it or not,
and life’s to short for long stories or regrets,

life’s too short for long stories,
life’s too real for fake friends,
so know that I love you you can always come see me,
because it’s peace love and respect till the end,

and damn,
we lost a good one today my oh my,
Mac Miller’s death wasn’t an Overdose,
it was a Suicide,

RIP Mac Miller,
may you Rest In Peace on Cloud 9,
may you finally find that love you need,
at that Eternal House in The Sky….

∆ Aaron LaLux ∆
RIP
Aaron LaLux Aug 31
Who Cares,
about anything,
anymore.

Seriously.
Aaron LaLux Aug 29
My ADHD Is SO Bad,
That I'm Already Bored With Reading This...

Aaron LaLux Aug 28
Come on man,
get with the program,
things are moving at a speed,
that's the opposite of a slow dance,

so no there's no time for negativity,
not at all not even a chance,
it's time to advance into the  21st Century,
we're no longer Cavemen & the Dark Ages have long ago passed,

& even though the Past has passed,
sometimes it still haunts our Collective Memory,
like that guy from Memento trying to count back to this moment now,
got the invitation long ago but still don’t know who sent for me,

but unlike that guy from Memento when I put back the pieces of the puzzle,
I hope I don't find a sick plot twist like discovering that I murdered my wife,
see sometimes we are our worst enemy plus memories can be tricky,
so I tread carefully as I retrace my steps that led me to this moment in time,

& I’m so fckn Emo for still dealing with these feelings,
of being in love with those that don't love me & pretending I don't give a fck,
even though I’m afraid of real emotions & afraid to show them & it shows,
so I guard my Heart’s ramparts & stand guard as my own Sentry Thug,

& I'm just so over not being able to get over it that I'm sick to my stomach,

& of course I have regrets from my past,
& of course I have pain I mean who doesn’t have at least some of that,
but resilience is one of the main keys to not suffering defeat,
I mean at least not in the streets by the hands of a Broken Soldier in retreat,

or a Soulless body that sold it's soul to party or an Emotional Zombie,
both as outdated as the old Atari & sorry but I suggest you press delete,

& that's why I won't engage with any more enraged psychopaths,
I’ve been down that road before so now I know better than that,
no Sir, no Ma’am, instead, I am, on what, They call, The Path,
in a forward upwards onwards motion on a sorta sorted NoWarPath,

& you can go ahead & hashtag that,
if you want to attempt to invent a fad,
here I'll do it 1st & you can do it 2nd,
& hey 2nd isn't 1st  but hey it's also not last so really it's not bad,

#NoWarPath

don't want to rain down a shower of bullets,
would rather just take a bubble bath...

excerpt from The Holy Trilogy Vol. 2: Manadalas
available world wide here: www.amazon.com/dp/1721134158
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