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Sam Jul 2017
Vengeful enemy
Why must you be?
Why must you lurk?
So deep inside of me

Is there a reason?
You burn my soul
My hopes and dreams
Fading

Your grip is unletting
As you drag me back
Back to the endless void
Sam Jul 2017
If I die in the mountains, leave me there to rot.
My boots will outlive my flesh.

So just push me from the trail, and cover me with dirt.
My soul, it will be free.

Bury me where the air is fresh and foliage is lush.
My true home, and the only one I've known.

Don't cry a single tear.
My corpse will disappear.

Far below the earth.
My heart can finally rest.
Sam Aug 2018
Why can't dying be delightful?
My feverish smile
Pathogens far too strong
I've failed this trial

I'm facing the end
My blood boils within
This cancerous fate
Carries my soul away
Crafting up pain
As the medics embrace

A dance with the darkness
I won't last too long
Carry me under
Where the sun fades away

Lost to the coffin
Finality's somber
Led by the reaper
To eternal slumber
No breath in my chest
I'm finally at rest
Sam Aug 2017
She doesn't wear a cape
And sure can't lift a car
But she holds me when I'm broken
And sees past all my scars
The world's burning faster
Each day a new disaster
She can't save every soul
But god she sure saved mine
Sam Jun 2017
You once asked me how I felt about you, and I answered
"I love you, and I always will."
Now as I lay in my misery, plagued by nightmares and haunted by the smell of your perfume. I pour another shot to take the pain away, and repeat those same words to the spiders in my dark, lonely, room.
"I love you, and I always will."
Sam Aug 2018
I'm sorry for the heartache
But please know that I tried
My friends all say it gets better tomorrow
But always lack the reasons why
Please forgive me for the games
I forced you to endure
And know heart has grown somber
Forevermore

Forget me like the ash
Cast out by your cigarette
Leave me here forever
To drown in my regret
My words become faint
Now I'm so far away
I'll watch over you
Like the glow from the moon
Sam Oct 2017
I wander to the forest
To stand among the giants
To listen to their stories

They know nothing of violence
They know nothing of greed
Each and every one
Began a simple seed

I stand among these titans
Staring at the leaves
My heart is quickly lost
Stolen by the trees
Sam Sep 2017
Hand in hand, walking fields of snow. Pail and pure, as if flake fallen from the full moon above. The way her hand fits in mine, sends my heart glissading into the idea of forever. As she turns to look at me, fresh snow clinging to her hair, the term "snow angel" takes on a whole new meaning. For the first time in a long time, my heart begins to feel... whole.
Sam Sep 2017
I'm tired of traffic
I'm tired of sleepless nights ... literally
I'm tired of alarm clocks
I'm tired of people littering
I'm tired of homeless people asking me for money
I'm tired of feeling like I owe them compassion
I'm tired of greedy, scumbag, politicians spewing their rhetoric
I'm tired of mouthpiece figureheads inhabiting every news outlet
I'm tired of news in general. It always seems to be ****** anyway
I'm tired of people who believe the earth is flat
I'm tired of the earth not being flat, so I can't push said people from the edge of it
I'm tired of people spreading their religions like cancer
I'm tired of every coffee shop conversation ending in a failed pyramid-scheme recruitment
I'm tired of murderers, rapists, and other delusional ***** sharing my precious oxygen
I'm tired of the fact we can't just feed them to endangered sharks
I'm tired of being expected to care
I'm tired of my failure to begin smoking cigarettes. God how I idolize them
I'm tired...
So I guess I'll get some rest
Sam Jun 2017
Why?

That's what I'm asking myself.

I should have been more careful
I just thought I knew you better
I was terribly mistaken
I should have never put my trust in you
I get that I'm a fool
I didn't know you were so cruel
I need space

You surely aren't my friend
You like to play pretend
You really aren't to blame, cause I knew this all along
You call me when you need me
You tell me that you're hurting
You know that I'm too nice
You kick me when I'm down

Why really isn't the question.

A silly dreamer like me.
I should know just what you are.
Sam Feb 2018
I could taste... loneliness in her kiss
A million stars caressing the night sky
We lost track of time, but there was no place we had to be
And in her kiss, I could taste everything
All the guys who said they'd never walkaway, but did anyway
The evenings from her childhood when her parents wouldn't stop fighting
That night back in December when she got a little too drunk and cried herself to sleep
All these memories painted on a canvas
And in that moment, I knew I'd be the one to stay
Sam Jan 2018
We danced together in the starlight
Crickets serenading our sidewalk performance
The blocks began to run together
With each move, you grew more distant from my arms
Then, to my dismay, the darkness swept you away
I found myself alone under a flickering street light
The curtain finally fell on you and I
Leaving me to misery
Sam Jul 2017
Through the chaos, I caught a glimpse of you
The nightmare unfolding couldn't rob you of that glorious, warm, smile
You sent me weaving through a labyrinth of lost souls
Extending my arms to embrace you
To shield you from this broken inhabitance
This world so far lost among the shadows
And as my palms met your back
I could feel that you were empty
The one with the strong, sturdy, smile
You were trembling
That's when I realized
We shared the same nightmare
That's when I realized
The sorrow living in your eyes
But when you hooked your arms around my back
And pressed your face into my chest
When your crystal tears bled through my shirt
That's when I realized
Nightmares can end
Sam Apr 2018
In a gust of wind, he felt freedom
He felt chains fall from his wrists
Shackles shatter from his ankles
His burdened mind freed from it's cage

And with the wind, he chose to travel
To see the beauty in each tomorrow
No more drowning in his sorrow

At first daylight, he took to the road
Destination still unkown
He traveled light, and alone
His heart was open to the world
Sam Jul 2017
I was your back-up plan.

The ***** pair of socks, still clean enough to wear.

The spare tire left to solitude in the trunk.

The only restaurant open on holidays.

I was your back-up plan.

So when your ship is sinking, remember that I was your life-raft.
And remember the way you stuck a knife in my back and threw me overboard.
I'm being sincere when I say, good luck fighting off the sharks.
Sam Jul 2017
Beautiful Bounty, that was her name
The vessel to take us to stake our new claim
Her cabins were sleek
A strong wooden frame
We set to the seas
Fortune awaits

Beautiful Bounty, now gone astray
Great blue skies
Now faded gray
weak lumber and hunger cause great dismay

Beautiful Bounty, sunk deep in the sea
Eighty-eight souls nevermore to be
No fame nor riches did they ever witness

Beauty Bounty, that was her name
A watery grave
The last thing she gave
Sam Jul 2019
So I bite the dagger
Cast to the flame once more
Living with this agony
Embedded in my chest
For the space is empty
Where your head used to rest

Now your silhouette
It haunts me
It haunts me oh so sweet
My empty arms pay tribute
To where you used to be
Sam Jun 2017
He watches the world turn from his window.
He sees the beauty as the trees bloom, and dance with the wind.
Birds sing and fly freely. It's a gentle place he thinks. A warm smile on his face. Despite all it's hardships, all the ugliness and turmoil it holds, it's still beautiful.
It seems like the world is miles away from him.
Every now and then, he lets out a few tears, but does his best to stay humble. He wants to run through the meadows, swim in the oceans, climb the highest mountains, but the I.V. in his arm simply won't let him.
He watches the world from his window.
Just wishing he could be a part of it.
Sam Jul 2017
Spare me your remorse
For I was a tragedy long before
you walked into my life
And wish not for my happiness
For gray is just as beautiful as
red
Have no pity for my agony
And understand it makes the good times better
Sadness signed a signature
And she wrote it on my soul
Sam Jun 2017
They say the black rose has the fewest thorns.
The truth is, she wears them on the inside.
Sam Oct 2017
You must excuse my lifeless demeanor
You see, physically, my heart is in my chest
But emotionally, it's torn

I hope you can see past my blank stare
Maybe catch a glimpse of something other than hopelessness
A humble smile
Is my way of telling you I'm alive
Sam Jun 2017
I always told you I would bleed for you. Still, I never thought that you would be the one to stick the dagger through my lung. I guess in a way, you took my breath away.
Sam Aug 2017
I spoke to a ghost last night. He woke me from my sleep.
You'd think ghosts would have better manners than to wake a man from his night terrors. No, he just stood there at the foot of my bed. Wearing that sadistically cheesy smile like a cut-rate actor on day time television. Maybe he was hungry for my soul? Perhaps a prankster trying to get a cheap laugh? Could it be he was just lonely and misunderstood? I don't know what the hell he wanted, and honestly didn't care.
My precious three hours of sleep had been disrupted.
I stared at him a bit longer, trying to figure out what to say. Chucking a pillow, I told him to "stop letting all the **** spiders in" and turned to go back to sleep. I'm pretty sure he's picked someone new to haunt by now.
Sam Mar 2019
The tragedy is
there's a prison in my mind
all the thoughts that lurk there
are ones I wish were never mine
they etch into my heart
the scars I wear so bright

They whisper wicked stories
of things that never happened
or maybe things that did
things that shouldn't create ripples
in the current in my life
but here I lay in bed
stuck awake at night
eyes cutting blankly
through the nothingness of my cold and dark bedroom
Sam Feb 2018
Eyes lost in a dreamy haze
Thinking of you puts my mind in a maze
Your blank stare catches my heart
Ensnaring my soul and binding it to yours
I'll follow you through the darkest of nights
Holding your hand when you lose your way
I could be the one who never walked away
To fill the emptiness you feel within
Like a broken alarm clock, you're singing in my head
And the tear drops in my eyes begin rolling to my bed
Hold me in your arms and claim my soul today
Sam Feb 2018
Somewhere in a distant twilight
You can find me on a rooftop
Perched like a bird without a home
Although I won't be singing
Instead, just reminiscing

Conversations in your bedroom
Those nights have come to pass
Now he fills that space beside you
Hope at last defines you

Nicotine whispers to my brain
As I resist the thought of your name
In cold moonlight I remain
Mind led back to distant days

My masonry perch becomes so lonesome
Twinkling stars my only console
In this dark, I do not sing
For my heart only beats when reminiscing
Sam Jun 2017
Call me a *******, cause I can't stay away.
I'm captured in the pain, the agony of love.
It's gnawing at my heart, and has been since the start.

Call me a sinner, cause I'll never be a saint.
The church has nothing left for me.
You are my religion and you're crawling in my veins.
You surely aren't an angel, at least not the kind with wings.
Still I'll always follow, the broken path you lead.

Call me a hypochondriac, I simply can't resist.
You suffocate me softly when you whisper in my ear.
Now I'm terrified that our first kiss will be my end.
You toy with my emotions, now my heart is caving in.

Our love is like poison.
Tragically, it's sweet.
I can't get enough, and it brings me to my knees.
Sam Dec 2018
He crawled from his van
Hair slicked back like the wind had grabbed it and never let go
"What's up man?"
His voice was shrill, and scratchy
Like a villainous rat from an animated movie
The sound of it honestly sent me into a daze
Trying to comprehend his existence
He'd carved himself a niche
Cleaning the carpets at this lackluster apartment community
I listened anxiously as he spoke to the other maintenance guy beside me
Although my time at this property was short,
I learned of Candido's way.
Sam Jun 2017
I was the crow who flew too high.

Now I'm lost among the sky.
Sam Nov 2017
I remember that day like it was yesterday.
The color of your eyes flawlessly matching that of the sky.
You made me promise that we'd never change.
I remember that day like it was yesterday.
Sam Jul 2017
They sing from trees

Cicadas come with Summer
Bringing that endless "buzz"

I find myself nostalgic when caught beneath their spell
Still it hits my heart and makes me feel okay

A bittersweet melody
One I need to hear

Yet it makes me sad
A melancholy euphoria
Sam Mar 2021
There's a lonesomeness about it
This existence
Things come and go, begin and end
We march through the cosmos
Onward towards finality
Towards an eternal slumber beneath the soil

Each story comes to end
Years of memories and experiences to be nevermore
To be buried in the bones
An individual
A species
Slowly strolling the path to the void
A speck in the concept of time
Destin to return to the stardust that came before us
Sam Jul 2017
He stands in the alley. Just watching the flow of urban sprawl. The dark, gray, hood cloaking him. Black jacket tight to his chest. His denim blue. Dark. The zippers clean-cut. It's not like girls to be in the alley, but there she is. Dark, purple, skirt attuned to her figure. Black leggings, and a top to match. She's enchanting. She's mesmerizing. As if from another planet. Dropped between the high-rises by some enigma.
                His past was forgettable. His home not a home. Nothing more than a trauma drenched memory. His mom not a mom. His dad long deceased. The streets filled the void the in his soul. While his horizons were bleak, he watched his mom use. Never getting better. Worse day by day. Cancerous fate tightened it's hold on his neck. He looks to see her eyes on him.
                  It wasn't odd, they were old friends after all. Friends with opposite backrounds. One bound by sadness, drowning in agony. The other pushed to success. Living a false dream while still managing to hold a smile. "I hate my mom, there is nothing left of her." He lipped to his quiet witness
                  He expected scorn, a sour look on her face. No one understood. Instead, she pressed a finger to the bottom of her lip, gaze turning to the sky. Her celestial, green, eyes illuminated by the moon. He pondered the barrage of words that she might say. From forgiveness, to half-hearted sympathies.
                                    No.
                    When her gaze dropped, their eyes met in a moment that felt like an eternity."Let's runaway?" Her question brief and completely unexpected.
                     His eyes began to tear. Swiftly, he locked her in his arms. Her eyes followed suit. What they lacked alone, they found amongst each other.
Written 2016. A bit of a short story, but still thought I'd share :)
Sam Sep 2017
I was facing death
Straight in the face
A sigh broke free
Out of apathy
I lacked the words to say
So I simple shut my eyes
Waiting for my demise
But the reaper
He walked right by me
I spit to the floor
and called to the shade
"You *******, that's right, walk away"
His laugh was stark
But hardly chilling
And with his grim, dead, voice he spoke
"Just you wait, your day will come"
Sam Jul 2017
You're the winter flower
Blooming with the snow
A fragile beauty built to cherish
Eternity in your eyes

I am just a vine
Stronger than the rest
They try to stomp me out
Oh how I contest

If they come to pick you
My thorns shall shred their skin
The only thing I ask
Is that you nuture me within
Sam Dec 2017
You were the catalyst that started my heart.
You were the oxygen that brought me to life.
Limbs once dormant, now guide my path.
Blood once frozen, now navigates my veins.
You took my hand and led me through a world that brought me to my knees.
When I see the future, I can rest with ease.
I know you'll always be there.
Standing next to me.
Sam Sep 2017
The aroma of lavender
Fills this dark, vacant, room
Your phantom here lingers
Living amongst shadows
Suddenly the air grows dull
And the scent of stale coffee regains prominence
Any remnants of you again taper away
Back to yesterday
Sam Jul 2017
You are cheery
And I am dreary

You are social
And I am a rock

You live to see the sun
I lurk among the shadows

But when I'm by your side
I actually feel alive
Dig
Sam Jul 2017
Dig
I was in a trench with all my sorrows

When all I needed was a rope
When all I needed was a ladder

You threw me a shovel
Sam Oct 2017
I think I was born to hold her in my arms.

Watching distant city lights dance and twinkle with the night sky.

The clouds forming the perfect backdrop as we spectate from a distance.

Surely when I find her we can make that dream a reality.

Live the kind of nights that you never forget.
Sam Mar 2018
As the **** of the cigarette grows closer to my lips
I find my mind free of any thought of you
And for five, ten, maybe twenty minutes if I'm lucky
I won't have to suffocate in your memory
Sam Mar 2018
She lost every reason she had to smile
Shoes worn out from walking the same sad sidewalks
That careless city holds eternally gray horizons
She dreams of a day the clouds will float away
She dreams of a day when she can feel... anything
Sam Sep 2017
Days crumbling faster, still the countless shades of hopeless linger in my eyes. Like notes written on a napkin from a diner where the doors never lock. A napkin soon to be ravaged by hands and stuffed into a pocket. The end result, shreds and pieces.
Reminiscent of the current state of my still beating heart.
                      Questioning every thought, every dream. Life falling
apart as the zipper travels down the seam. Skies become gray, and everything is grim. Love lost to the girl who stole my whole world. Now I fill the void with cigarettes left half smoked. Trying to find a way, to mend a heart left fully broke.
Sam Aug 2017
The gloom pours out of the withered remnants of my soul.
Aching bones tell me that I'm alone.
Cast aside by the shadows of you and I.
I fall once more to where even the stars can't fight the dark.
Turning pages to reveal more blank.
I throw the pictures to the flame.
And slowly, I walk away.
Sam Aug 2017
Sifting through the ash of every cigarette

Sifting through the ash
Frantically searching

For the broken
For the lost
For the forsaken fragments of my soul

But the ash grows thicker
And my pulse grows thin
Sam Nov 2017
I've never been much for wine.
If I was, you'd be the last sip of a fine red.
A moment staring at the empty glass.
The taste lingering.
Soon, a craving fills the mind.
Followed by a void feeling in the heart.


I've never been much for wine.
I used to be much for you.
Now memories infect my head.
The last moments we spent together.
Like that last sip,
you've become unforgettable.
Sam Feb 2018
Wayward with my sorrows
I no longer search
Burdened by this fate
I no longer fight
Succumbing to this grief
I no longer dream

Caught by her kiss
I grow comatose
Blessed by her embrace
I finally feel at home
Embedded in her heart
I am whole again
Sam Jul 2017
Hope depleting
Heart beat fleeting
Cast astray
Void taking over
Numb to the touch
Cold at the skin
Crushed by the pain
A life lived in vain
There is no escape
Chalk and yellow tape
A hero, not pretend
Now has met his end
Sam Jul 2018
Your eyes were timid when I told you that I loved you
I'll admit, my heart was jaded before I met you
In a swirl of it's own misery
Darkest of clouds constantly consuming every pigment of light

How could I forget the the days you'd sit there next to me
There was a warmth in the way you'd pour soul into mine
You taught me the definition of "hope" with the way you wore that broken smile

Your eyes were timid when I told you that I loved you
My heart was open, hoping to find you
Like that song we always used to play
You were the melody that marked the end
Slowly, softly, you faded away
Sam Nov 2017
You lost me like a tree loses a branch in a storm.

I'm gone.

Now your story is filled with alcohol and nicotine.

Maybe if you believed in me, I'd still be there to fill the void in your heart.
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