Eating meals together
Sharing the same drink
Buying the same things
Walking home together
are you are friend or a lover?
whatever, whoever you are
The times spent with you were always beautiful

Clumsy mistakes that brings forth
Laughter that could reach the heavens
The times spent with you were always beautiful

Consolation by your kind words
Comfort upon your shoulders
The times spent with you were always beautiful

Beauty fades
Washed away by the river of time
Brings forth my friend's betrayal

Innocence fleeting like dreams
The memory of you brings forth sorrows
The pure feeling with you will never return
The times spent with you are still beautiful
Beautiful
and
Painful

Darkness
Can never swallow light
But it can swallow
Your heart...

So keep your passion
Burning
coz darkness is just at the corner
Lurking
  Waiting
For the right prey it will be
Hunting.

Your back that is shining
It is you that i am chasing
To become like you, i am dreaming

How can someone from the past
Live in the present and can easily surpass
The me who you walked past

They kept comparing me to you
Saying how much better you were
And you dont even have a clue
How much it hurts, because its true

The fact that it is you
Is what hurts the most
Because you are the person
that i have lost

They kept comparing me to you
Saying how great you were

I am hurt
I am angry
For i am you
And you are me
But how is it that you are always greater than me?

They kept bringing up the past
Competitions won
Awards gotten
Honors received
A bright future ahead

But guess what?
Your future is my present!
The bright future they said is the moment I am living now
But it isn't as bright as they've hoped
Because at me no one bothers to look
Because at the me who was you, they always looked back

But hey cant you see
That person is still me
Please don't just look back
And please look at the current me
Accept the real me

You were bright
You were me
But now this is how i came to be
So please just...

Huhh....

My mind isn't a one way track
The weak train who is now almost giving up
From the back and forth ride
Decisions are made only after
Thinking about it a 100 times
After my actions are done
I think about it a 100 times more

The weak train who is now almost giving up
The train wants to stop
The train wants to rest

The train doesn't know itself
The train asks if he is indeed a train
The train thinks he is no longer a train
but a pendulum
from those thoughts always swinging back and forth

The doctor says thinking hardly is a good thing
Inorder to come up with a good decision
But doctor
what you dont know is
the train still hasnt made a decision
it's mind is still full of question
running back and forth
till now, it still hasn't reached its destination

Peace shouldn't be kept
But spread

Those monsters
Hiding behind their carefully ironed suits
They hold peace in their hands
Peace chained by their greed
Their so called peace
That could only be enjoyed by the few
That survived the war
On the right side of the border

But is that really peace?

When on the other side
The side that lost

A child is crying
Because his father is missing
His mother is dying
His sister is itching
Because of a disease that was spreading
From the rotten bodies
That laid across their country
The country that lost
In the war called
Peace keeping

Why must peace be kept
Those monsters keep strangling peace in their hands

Peace shouldn't be kept
But spread

There are times when we dont ask for the best
We just want a bit of happiness

When a dozen of flowers and a bunch of cards aint enough
But those three words is more than enough

When dining in high class retaurants isn't romantic
But eating street foods with you is so sweet

When you do every thing I ask isn't lovely
But smiling at me melts my heart

I do not ask for your whole life to be mine
All I want is a piece of me to be a part of your life

And a doze of you in mine.
That is how I'll have my happiness in small dozes. <3

Can I just even for once
Fall in love

My friends asks for advice
I tell them a lot in reply
But they always say I wont understand
For I haven't fallen in love

So just once
Can you let me fall in love

They always cry
Hurt each other to an extent
But at the end of the day
Saying those hurtful words were not meant
And kiss those tears away

It is always bothering me
How I am stuck with this jealousy
Seeing lovers in the streets
I am filled with envy

So why can't I fall in love?
Why cant I feel the butterflies in my stomach
The spark at the accidental touch
The heart that pounds with joy
Why?

Even just for once
Can I,  please let me
Can I once fall in love?

I feel empty
My emotions were stolen from me
By the man who once told me that he love me
But suddenly, he just left me

How a fool I was when I told him I would give him anything
So a gave my all, I gave my everything
But Without a warning he was gone
Took everything now I am left with none

Reality is what separates the real me and what you see
Reality is what we call it
but how come we can never be real in this world we call reality?
In order to survive reality
we must change, conform to the standards set by this "reality"
we must hide the "real" us. Lock it up inside the box we call the mind
The real me only now exist in an imaginary world made by my mind
Facing reality another persona is created
A fake who lives in Reality
Someone who is kind hearted and good.
Always pleasing people.
Praisng the one's higher in heirarchy.
Never forgets good manners
Always says thank you
when the "me" inside my mind just shouts out
"*******"

Reality is what separates the real me and what you see

Everyday I tell you, Saranghe
But you always say,Mianhe
You're sorry that it can't be me
The one that you can love truly
Just how much sadder this could be

At the very first time I saw you
I fell in love, yes it’s true
For your beauty have surpassed all that I’ve seen
I bet you could take me to places I’ve never been

Forgive me for it might not be good
These visions in my mind is a little bit rude
To feel your body and mine intertwined
For now it’s the only thing running on my mind

As I’m getting closer and closer
Your beautiful traits are now clearer
That slender body and nice curves you have
To hold you in my arms, I would love

That red color of yours fills me with lust
Makes me want to grab you, oh so fast
They say in your kind, you’re the last
Then for me to have you is a must

Though your price is higher than the ordinary
I think having you is like fulfilling my destiny
Oh how wonderful how it feels
I’ve finally bought you, my new HIGH HEELS. :)

I loved you once
But no longer it is now
For I hate you more than ever

I loved you once
Did a lot of things
Just to get your love in return

I loved you once
And gave you my heart
You accepted it
But you never gave yours in return

I loved you once
But I no longer have a heart to love
For you never gave it back
Now I am left with a mind that can only hate

I loved you once,
But I’ll hate you forever

I loved you once,
But I hate you
For not giving the love back
For not returning my heart

I loved you once,
But I’ll hate you forever
I’ll hate you more than ever
until the day when you’ll return my heart
and then on that day

I can love you once more.

Many know of their suffering
Only some knows to what extent
A few cared
But to help? No one dared.

This is a story of her and him,
Where they lived
Freedom is just but a FANTASY.

Her heart was aching,
the pain flowing through her veins,
reaching to the very tips of her body,
sinking deeper to her bones.

Though she was hurting
she could not dare let the tears flow
‘coz where she lives
only the free birds were allowed to cry.


When it’s raining he celebrates
he goes outside, to be drenched
he looks at the sky,
to  feel the rain drops on his face.

Only then his tears can flow
When the heavens have allowed him to conceal those tears
For where he lives
one can only cry in the rain.

For where they live, one can only dream for a split-second
getting lost in their wonderful dreams cost a lot

To dream a split-second more could cost your life

So they whisper their dreams to the wind,
hoping it would reach to the other side of the mountains

They pass their dreams to the birds,
hoping they could fly across the borders

They pray to the dark clouds to carry their dreams,
hoping when it decides to pour those drops of rain, it would be on that place.
To let the rain pour along with their dreams .
Let it pour anywhere but their home.

For where they live, dreaming is not for free.
So they can only hope that they dreams are carried to that place.
The place past those concrete walls,
to the other side of the mountains,
to the land where their dreams could be free.


I have heard the wind,
The birds have reached me
I saw the rain pour,
along with their dreams

Now I carry it
So I dream for me,
I dream for her,
I dream for him
And I thank the heavens.

I thank them, for where I LIVE one could dream for FREE.

Depression
she was a fighter, I admit
Several knights have fallen to a defeat
Cast down to an eternal pit
of negativity that she submits

Confidence, Self-worth, Joy
are few of the heroes that have first fallen
Followed by logic, intelligence, pride and sense
Until little by little she was winning

The top of the tower she was conquering

then the tower was slowly changing
cue in isolation and self condemnation

But oh boy
when she thought she had finally won
when she thought the war was finally over
Awakens my last remaining fighter
that was once in a slumber
the last remaining member of the knights order
and she is up to bring back the tower's lost order!

Shall I call this knight HOPE
small and fragile as she seems,
but boy she was so dope

Everytime depression knocks her down
HOPE would break and scatter all around
But dont get me wrong, hope was not losing
coz this is her type of fighting
and by this she was actually winning

Her scattered pieces that trailed every corner
Shone brightly even at the pits of negativity
The light became a guide
A path that let out her comrades from the pit

Now everything in the tower was shining
Even the petty and dark depression was submitting

For darkness can never win over light
Thus mark depression's era as over
I killed her
or I may have not
but

To me you’re a star
And I am just but a gazer
Though our distance is too far
Every night I utter a prayer

Come a day where I can see
Well, actually night probably
Where you and I will be
Together happily

So I continue to watch you gleefully
Maybe there come a time you’ll fall for me
Maybe then hopefully
There will be a you and me

Even the stars fall.

But then again I realize
The things that fall from the sky are not stars
Just meteorites.
So basically you can’t be mine unless
The end of the world is coming
And real stars are falling

But until then I continue
To gaze at my star that is *you

I can only remember
to cherish it when it's gone
I can only remember
how I loved it when it's lost

With a pencil I got
      I wrote my love on a piece of paper
When my heart was hurting
    I wanted to forget
         So I erased everything that was written

I wrote my love on a piece of paper
     this time with a pen
            hoping it could be forever
When I was hurting
     my heart feeling weary, my sight were a bit blurry
           as tears fell on that piece of paper
               the written love I thought was forever
                  was short and it was suddenly over
So everytime I felt hurt
      I pushed back all the tears
           I swallowed every pain
And that's how I was able to write my love forever
I wounded my heart
It might heal
But forever will the scars remain
My love is written in my heart

I dont give a ****
I dont give a ****
I didn't really wanted to have that
I didn't even liked that person
Nevermind me

These are the words I say to hide my weak self
I don't want to claim anything
For I am always afraid
Afraid to love
and to lose that love
Afraid to want
and never getting it
Afraid to chose
and at the end not to be chosen

I don't attach myself to anything
To not get hurt
At the end no one did hurt me
But still
Yes, I am not hurt
But I am lonely

I often look at the ground wishing to see the world
But only to find myself, staring at dirt
I often look at the sky wishing to see the world
But only to find myself, staring at none
I look around, what ever surrounds,
But all I see are the walls that have trapped me

But then I see you with me
You looked at me, and as I looked back
I saw in your eyes,
the real world that was just infront of me

I have something to tell
But no one understands
Will you?

I love him
He loves me too

I love him
He loves me too

The problem now
Is they are two
Both are different
The old and new

I love them
They love me too
Must I really choose
The old or new?

The old, I loved
Long before
Started as friends
And then love grew

The new, I met
Not too long ago
Was a stranger to each other
But then love grew

I love them
They love me too
Must I really choose
The old or new?

I love them both
With all my life
Half of my heart
Each of them owns
In order to live
I need the two

The old is like
A home to me
A comfortable one
To replenish my energy
No matter where I’ll go
In his arms I’ll be back

The new is like
Places to see
Unfamiliar,
Exploring and exciting
At times when comfortable becomes boring
He adds an element
Of fun in living

I love them
They love me too
Must I really choose
The old or new?

You may call me crazy
You may even curse at me
But both I love
With all my heart
I can’t let go of either one

Can’t I have both?

I know I can’t love two people
I know so well
But can’t I be selfish,
And have them both?

I have two lovers
I love them too
I don’t want to hurt either
What should I do?

Time have stopped for her
Until he came
It was then when her time ticked again


Then little by little she started moving
and with those movements
little by little she started growing


the time spent with him
made it possible for her to again
little by little started living


Every moment with him made her
little by little started enjoying
It made her realize, that for him
little by little she started caring


More time passed, then she knew
little by little,.. no..
more and more she started loving

More and more she started knowing
about the person that made her life worth living

More and more of him she wanted having
So more and more of him she kept asking

She loved him and He loves her
So more and more of him he kept giving

But the cycle of asking and giving did not cease

So the more and more she kept having,
The more and more of him he kept losing

It was late when they realized,
little by little his time was ending


Little by little he lost his sight
More and more she saw his plight

Little by little he couldn't feel
More and more she prayed for him to heal

Little by little that he couldn't hear
More and more she whispered in his ear,
"I love you with everything I have, everything I am, and everything I'll ever be                       my dear"

Little by little he was suffering
More and more she kept hurting

Little by little that the time kept moving
More and more his end is nearing

And

Little by little he stopped breathing
More and more she knew it was coming

More and more his life was leaving
little by little he stopped moving

And when he met with his ending
His clock also stopped working.

Time had stopped for her, but he made it move.
Now time had stopped for him,
and there is nothing she can do...

Don’t you dare try to betray
A woman that chose to stay
To love you till the end
To your wounds she promised to mend

Don’t you dare try to leave
A woman who live
Lives just for you
For you, anything she can do

Don’t you dare try to hide
From a woman that lied
And said she will be okay
As long as beside her you’ll stay

But you did
Betrayed her and left
You even hid
Yourself

now

Don’t you dare try to find
A woman you’ve left behind
To find her, you cannot
‘Coz here in this world, she is not

Don’t you dare regret
The things you have let
Let unfold because of your choices
'Coz you gave in to your vices

Don’t you dare forget
The sufferings she had met
The burden she carried alone
Your sins to her that you can never atone

When you read a story
and it ends short
you are left hanging
you are disappointed

When you read a story
and it ends long
even the problems has been resolved
you are still disappointed

you've already lived through the story
every main character is a friend
every nemesis is an enemy of your own
you wanted to see every characters story
but your time is not enough
the story has been too long
it must end

stories
even when short or prolonged
endings
even when hanging or solved
still leaves a sad longing
at the end

When depression strikes,
A door for poetry opens.

The door that lets out the misery
The pain that keep hurting me
In turn invites public sympathy
By posting some of these poetry

Poetry that grew, from the feelings I have taken out.
Poetry that nourished, from the tears that I have shed
Poetry that would die down as times passes by.

And what I hope for,
Is when the leaves of my peotry starts to fall to the ground
My heart would be healed from the pain that once surround.

We should never get used to something
Because times are always changing

People you spent most of your time
Friends you call them
Emotions and memories that you share
But there will come a time
When they wont even care

That is why I tell you

You should never get used to something
Because time, no
People
Are always changing

I have a dream, a dream to fly
To rise above the clouds and touch the sky
Be able to reach the heavens and soar up high
What a wonderful dream indeed, a dream to fly


But it's just a dream, for I can't fly
For I'm just a peacock, looking at the sky
Not like the others who could soar up high
I'm just a peacock, and I don't know how to fly


Though how colourful my wings could be
It still doesn't have that ability
To help me reach my dream, to fly gleefully
But sadly, I guess I'll just be dreaming for whole eternity


I wish I could escape this sad reality
And let my mind be filled with insanity
And maybe, just maybe only there I can see
A peacock with spread out wings, flying gleefully

This isnt a poem
Its my emotions
Poured into words

I could no longer contain
The pain I'm feeling
Allow me to share

It hurts
Its painful when you get left out
When people forget your existence

But I cannot blame them
For it might have been my fault

Have I unknowingly built a wall
That no one could climb?
No one, not even me

I cannot escape from this place
A fortress I built from peace in solidarity

But as time passed by
the peace came on too strong
The peace felt turned into screaming loneliness

But still I cannot climb this wall...

So let this poem be my memory
Let this poem leave a trace of me
So that when the time will come
When the time have passed to much
That the wall is old enough to be fragile... and break
Maybe that time people will see
The traces I've left
That proves in this world there was me

It is my heart
It is my life
My own emotions and feelings

But It is not mine
For it is yours

I can no longer contain these emotions
I can no longer control my heart
I can no longer choose my life

For everything leads to you

It is mine but not mine
*For I am yours

who are they to tell us
what should we do and what not
those selfish *******,
already living their lives
and they try to take away ours
by telling us what to do?

no they can't
I won't allow it
nobody can dictate my happiness