hey
i know you’re going through a lot right now
and i know you think life isn’t worth it right now
but think of all the today’s
you thought you wouldn’t get through
and all the hard times
you thought would **** you

but please just keep going

you don’t know how long the future will last
unless you make it through this moment
that you feel like will last forever
until one day it’s in the past

then you’ll look back and say
“hey that wasn’t so bad anyway”
you have to just
keep
going

when i look at you now
now it’s different than i did then
we said we were in love
well then what am i in now?

i know i’ll never be able
to change your mind
but can you just believe when i say
i’m not myself when you’re mine

what i’m saying here is
your opinion of me when we’re together
is greatly different when we’re apart
should’ve known that from the start

now these days when i see you
it’s never rent free in my brain anymore
and although my heart still feels sore
it’s not from you ******* with it anymore

she was so good as holding others together
the world would probably crumble at their feet
should she not continue
gluing together their pieces
as though it’s her job

i’m not the bad guy you make me out to be
that’s just what you like to believe
something in you brings out the worst in me
sadly that’s the only part of me you’ll be able to see
so next time you’re pointing fingers
look at your soul in a mirror
because there i hope you’ll discover
how it felt to be your lover

there’s been too many times before this

where i say i’ll change and you adore it

but now i’m just trying to not think about you anymore

while still hoping you’ll walk through the door

i know it’s my fault you left
but i can’t help but feel upset at myself
that i made it so easy
for you to leave

i want to believe this is just a nightmare yet i
can’t
wake
up

wipe those tears from your eyes
or let your pillow do it for you
because either way they’ll just
keep
coming
back

do you still remember all the advice i gave you
even though i did the opposite?

here i go again i’m pretending that i’m okay
when honestly i don’t feel that way
don’t ask me i really can’t explain
just know there’s no one but me to blame
all these feelings won’t go away
certainly feels like i’ve been lead astray
in times like these i’d be looking for you to hold
but it’s because of you that i’m so cold

although we’re in the same town still
we’re on separate planets
and every time our worlds collide
i find you on my mind

there’s a hole in my heart
but what does it need?
i’ve tried drinking, juuling, ***, and smoking ****
whenever i felt this way you were always there
but now thanks to you it’s why i need repaired

my worst days now
are my best days then

though you many feel lonely
with what you’re feeling
you are never alone

i know this will all makes sense one day
but right now i just want to fast forward and then hit play
because in my mind demons stay
and nightmares haunt me even when awake

you must lose yourself in order to find yourself

it’s not that i don’t trust you
i just have trust issues
i guess i’m trying to say it’s not you
it’s me
or does that just sound too cliche?

the more memories in my head that become unrepressed
the more i realize that i’m blessed
it took a lot to get me here
and the end is nowhere near
because life is a journey, not a race
i’m so grateful to be in this place
and i tell myself
it could always be worse

it’s funny that we push people away
when we want them to stay
no wonder people drink
it’s like humans just aren’t meant to think
a human without emotion
is just a robot
not knowing why you’re feeling these feelings
is worse than having a reason
i’m in habit of giving someone pieces of my heart
without referring to the return policy
but i guess i’d rather be deep then shallow
i see my reflection in my shadow
and in the end i’d rather feel everything
than feel nothing at all

life is too short to wish you were living someone else’s

don’t take what someone says to heart
their comment is nothing but an opinion
not a fact

my biggest fear has evolved from my fear of being alone: not being understood. that is the most isolating thing i’ve come to fear

you and the stars are so alike. so stunningly amazing. and i find my self gazing in awe at you. because i fall more and more for you every day. and like the stars, i always know at the end of the day, you’ll always be there for me.

find a passion to keep your days passing

if you’re a good person
even better things will come

depression has taken away everything else important to me in my life so i have no choice but to write about it

it’s seems like i don’t control my moods, but they control me

it’s hard to have a positive outlook on the future with depression
when that’s what i feel all the time

i’ve learned this past year to just be yourself and embrace it. no point in fighting it if people are going to judge you no matter what. not that it’s that easily achieved to just be you. but just doing stuff you want to not because someone else wants you to is so liberating.

there’s million broken thoughts
behind that forced smile
there’s a million broken silent screams
behind that forced laugh

tell me why everyone has to hide it
when we’re all feeling the same thing
i promise i understand what you’re going through
we’re all feeling the same thing

i know we all have a purpose
in this world
i know that you have to have darkness
in order to have light
but i’ve been in the dark for so long
if there’s one thing
i want to know
it’s if this suffering
will be worth it
because a life without meaning
isn’t what i’m living for

i feel like i can’t move
i have no motivation to
so i don’t
but laying in my bed
i also feel so powerful
and like i can change the world
but i can’t
because i’m laying in my bed
lost in my own head

i leave your office feeling like i’m on top of the world
but then i feel the world on top of me

be who you are
love who you want
we’re all just feeling
the same thing called love

being gay/trans/“abnormal” isn’t a disorder, but that kinda attitude sure is contagious

men and women are forced in to boxes and labeled
with no room to grow
told that colors you wear make you a boy or girl
the clothes you wear, the things you do
how you act
for some reason
make you only a boy or girl

you can change my mind
but you can’t change my heart

the day i met you
in knew from the moments
leading up to it
the feeling of emptiness
was me missing you
and now when we’re apart
even for a little bit
it’s me missing you

if i had one wish
it would be to see in to the future
but as long as you’re in it
there’s nothing i would change

when i leave this earth
and everything i do is in vain
at least i helped with your pain
even if it was just for a day
you’ll never suffer alone

i hope you don’t relate to my poetry
because i hope you’re living a life
so beautifully unique
and unbelievably interesting
that none of my words
have meaning to you

perhaps the reason i play sims
is i’m convinced that it’s the only way i’ll be able to experience a life
other than the one i have now

being different
may mean you’re not normal
at least to society
but it also means
you’re brave enough
to break the mold
and to me that’s more rewarding
than fitting in

if you rush through life
only looking toward something inthe future
you’re going to find
that when that moment comes
the only thing you will feel
is regret

how can i talk about how the world is
when i’ve only seen such a small part of it
but i guess when you’re stuck in a bubble
it starts to be the only world you know

either i have butter fingers
or happiness is coated in butter
because i can’t seem
to hold on to it

it’s hard to let something go when they’ve already taken it away from you

i may not have tests or homework anymore
but life is a test enough alone

no two cars are the same on a highway
they may be the same make or model
but they may not have the same engines
that operate the same
or seen the same stretch of roads
and some cars just aren’t meant for certain terrains
so why do we treat other humans any differently?

young people’s dreams are crushed
by the place they go where they are taught
to learn a cookie cutter way
and that their gifts are not gifts
in a world like this
we’re meant to be robots
creativity and originality is
simply dismissed