Remember this,
but I can't be sure,
if I spoke to him or not,
if I left my door unlocked,
if I lost my books upstairs,
if I started what I needed,
if I even brushed my hair
because my mind refuses stimulus
and all I know is that it clears,
everything from my memories
leaving me in a haze, protecting me from something,
experiences I can't remember why I fear,
making it harder to rationalize my emotions,
as if I needed more paranoia
if I could remember
what he said to me,
when I closed myself off,
when I left my guard down,
when I began noticing these trends,
when I stopped caring if I was okay,
and all I know is nothing
from what stings,
leaving me all alone in a horrible fright
of thoughts I can't resurface.

rip me, gotta love when you actually cannot remember events and then go into this spiral of doubting any of your emotions having validity because you ACTUALLY CAN'T REMEMBER ANYTHING- I woke up from a nap the other day and couldn't remember anything I did that day at all, nothing, not even if I had gone to class or ate

You are all repression
and denial and avoidance
in the face of anything
not ideal
because the alternative is
self hatred
And we both love
too much to prioritise
your happiness
and do you see now
this is killing me

She was dying for Attention,
But was unwilling to entertain comments
For her intellectual or physical Exhibitionism.
It seems as if she was trying to provoke

Feminists clash with Misogynists
Yang versus Yang
Tempers flare as Temperatures rise.
Not a cool breeze in sight.
It's a Factional Fight
We like to think
We're  and advanced and progressive
But the World
Ain't so sexy any more.

Your remarks have been censored!
Your remarks have been banned!
Your remarks have been erased from the official records!
Do you remember
What you said?

It's hard to remain enthusiastic
About participating in Society
When the primary objective
Is to "keep people in their place".
They give you the freedom to do some things you enjoy
As long as they remain in control.

"Hey, Gene."
"I caught my daughter, Lisa, posing nude online."
"What do you think I should do about it?"
"Do you think I should confiscate her computer,"
"Or beat her, or what?"
"Well, ask those guys at the American Nazi Movement meeting, "
"Which you attend, Ralph."
"I'm sure they know a lot about Obscenity."

Is the Original Sin
Do not partake in the fruit from the Tree Of Knowledge!
You will be banished from the comfortable "Eden"
Of your own Ignorance and Stupidity!

BlueRain Nov 2016

She stares at me,
Her eyes seem to search mine.
Her hands stretch towards the division,
Towards that finely marked glass line.

She seems to whisper something,
Sayings too faint to hear.
Yet her lips move with such passion,
As though her utterances are very dear.

I take a step back & stare,
At the being before my eyes.
Torn robes & mangled hair,
And scarred hands to my surprise.

I try to draw close,
Yet I cannot seem to reach.
It's as though a barrier lies between us,
One that I cannot breach.

I looked with more intent,
But the less I saw instead.
Yet in her eyes I could discern,
Something that filled me with dread.

Then suddenly it hit me
From out of nowhere
And like an unraveled mystery
All became clear.

For in my curiosity
And my desire for close inspection
I had failed to see
I was staring at my own reflection


Thomas Campbell Nov 2016

Previously I purged.
Traces and reminders
Repressed with zeal
Detached from truth.

Now I binge,
Indulgent hypotheses
Fuel fantasies
Detached from truth

Elusive middle ground
Between denial and delusion

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