There were a few things my heart couldn't let me share.
A few words my mouth dared not declare.
A fleeting thought that I wouldn't let take hold.
The breath I fought to keep these few fears from being told.
There are a few things I've yet to overcome.
And until then... I shall hold onto them...

But, only until sharing them I can let be done.
When I know that I faced that beast and won.

There were clouds in her eyes,
From dreams she longed to share.
But instead rain fell from her open skies,
In rolling drops called tears.
She held on to all her dreams, for fear,
That no one would ever really steer,
Their planes into her stormy life to see,
Her land, her skies, or her deep blue sea.
When she once opened up herself to show
The world she had let inside her grow,
The ships and planes all turned away.
All cowards, fearful of a little rain.
However, over time it all evaporated.
That lonely rain got cloaked.
By plane's that were wreaked,
And their black puffs of smoke.
Her eyes no longer held that thunderstorm.
But instead they have changed form.
Now behind her eyes rests a burning forest,
That engulfs everything with an ember- a promise.
She isn't that fearful girl anymore,
Who wanted people to come in and explore.
Now, instead, she is a raging, flowing wildfire,
Who will never again cry
For those who run from her attire.

There is a spark,
in your soul,
that so many
underestimate.
They seemingly
keep forgetting
about this little thing
that we all call air.
That with a little huff
and a little puff
from those soft lips,
you could turn
this entire world
into a living,
breathing,
blazing fire.
An inferno,
made entirely
out of your beautiful
and glorious love,
you have
for yourself
and others.
Therefor,
their words,
can't ever touch you.
I believe that's why,
when they try,
you just smile and say,
"Have a beautiful day."

Your tongue was a leash, and it had held me captive for far too long.

Fill my head with the brisk, night air.
So I can finally think.
Fill my lungs with the moons soft, light rays.
Let it drown me.
Fill my bones with the dry feel of leaves.
So it can replace the ache.
Fill my heart with this earthy content sound.
So the calm can take.
Fill me up with this autumn evening.
Let it consume me whole.
Let it, for just one night, do all the feeling.
Let this autumn night take control,

Once
         there
               was
                     a
                      world
                        that
      ­                  would
                        have
                     much
               rather
         given
 love....

Whenever I think about being loved,
I think about all those small moments.
You know, the small gestures people do.
The way they go out of their way to say, "I love you."
With their kind smiles,
and teasing pokes,
and questions about how're you're doing...
However, sometimes there's just not enough small moments in a day.
And maybe that's why there just isn't enough people feeling loved.

It's a hole,
An abyss,
A seemingly endless pit of nothingness.
No light...
No air...
It's the very core of darkness.
You see no shadows,
but you feel their cold embrace.
You hear no voices,
but your thoughts fear their screams.

Your mind becomes the cruelest of all things.
Drawing up the allusion of beast's.
The ones that hide between the walls;
knocking while you drift off to sleep.
The ones that slip under the bed,
as soon as the lights wink out.
As soon as you full up the sheets...

The dark is the place of terrifying imagination.
Were your worst dreams become reality.
There is no escape, for you are blind.
Only the monsters know where you are.
And- and they are there.
Waiting for you to shut off the light,
for the sun to die...
For the dark.
For you to bring them to life.

"What can be easily torn apart,
can be quick to deceive,
will build up walls just to rip them down,
is foolish and naive?"

"What can be tremendously fierce,
and all at once soft,
if unprotected, pierced,
and hard to defrost?"

"What can hold love,
yet shatters it like a porcelain doll,
can soar like a dove,
or just as easily slip and fall?

"Where are you trapped,
what keeps you locked in?
Answer this riddle,
and you'll be free; for you win."

              *

I think over the words.
Turn them in my mouth.
I have to complete the riddle,
or I'll never be let out.

Without hesitation, I turn to my captor.
A small lock that rests on thick bars.
waiting for my answer.

"Well, even though you try and thwart,
me and my very freedom.
The answer to your riddle is my heart.
So let me go, for you've been beaten!"

My voice echos in the chamber,
that I now realize is my chest.
The rips make up the cage,
and the heart's been holding me in arrest.

I press myself against my lungs,
and take in a big gulp of air.
The key hole shrikes as it unlocks
And I leave my self made snare.

They tell us to speak.
To free the ache in our caged chest.
So we rip open our ribs,
to let the fears spill out.
Expecting,
hoping,  
that someone will try to catch them.
Envelop them in their arms.
Secure them in their anxiety.
Warm them with their kindness.
We believe that someone,
just maybe,
quite possibly,
however foolishly,
will help us burden the pain
that's trying to collapse
our already fragile hearts.
That someone might clear away
our scarlet, stained tears.
And lend us a hand
as we slip farther and farther,
towards the edge of the blackest chasm.
But even as our eyes scream, "save me".
And our blue lips tremble,
They choose to look away.
Because they knew.
They knew they never really meant it.
It was just empty,
pointless words to try out.
Throw around like party confetti.
      "I will listen"              "I won't judge"
                    "trust me"
"I'm hear for you"                    
                                "Believe­ me"
  "Maybe I can help"                    "Don't hold it in"
                       "it'll be OK"

And we believed it.
For we really, really wanted to.
We wanted to know that we would,
in fact, be, "OK"
And still, here we are.
Smiling as we beat ourselves
into invisible,
blue and purple hues.
Until we let go of the edge
and finally 
                 F
  
                     A
    
                          L
      
                             L
                              
                               ­   L
                                
                           ­            L
                                            into the blackness of the chasm.

Leaving them to finish burying us.

"Why did you stop trying to fix me?" she asked.

"Because, you can't glue someone back together when they won't hold still long enough to dry."

I've seen miracles happen.
I've seen families break apart.
I've seen love freely given.
And the hatred in some hearts.
I've heard the honest pleas of a broken;
as they fell to their trembling knees.
I've heard the cruelty a tongue can wield,
as they cut down their enemies.
This world is filled with good.
But also consumed with bad.
Don't be deceived by someones words.
But pay attention to how they act.

The truth is very simple.
Our world desires hate.
It will tell you lies inside of truths,
It will smile while it manipulates
It craves the swords on our tongues,
and the stings from our fists.
It feeds us hope while we're young
just to give us knives to cut our wrists.
It tells you to be positive,
while throwing daggers of misfortune at your feet.
It laughs when you're broken,
and whispers to you words of your defeat.
It will want to be your friend
just for the purpose of destroying you
Lifting up all your hopes and dreams,
then making sure you never follow through.
Man plays an awfully risky game,
Where your life is the thing put at stake.
And if you don't play your cards just right,
that's exactly what the world will take.
So, when the world is pulling triggers,
and you think that it's too late,
remember what God gave us,
and know that your love can conquer hate.

Often times, it's the person sitting right in front of you.
Smiling and laughing and cracking jokes.
The one that's always the first to ask how you're really feeling.
The one who will sit with you in silence,
Or let you scream to them your frustrations.
The one who will give you a shoulder, an ear, a hug, anytime you need it.
The one who is always there, and never judging.
People don't often see their pain, because they've become so good at hiding it.
So they keep smiling too big,
and laughing too long,
and letting people soak their shoulders with their salty tears.
Because, unfortunately,
Depression targets the ones that feel too much,
until they feel nothing.

We're all fighting for something.
Sometimes for things we don't need.
They take up our being,
and sometimes, they're the legacy we leave.
But we keep fighting,
for that one little thing.
And we let it consume us.
Because we're unwilling to set ourselves free.

They were greek mythologies;
Of a Trojan horse and forbidden love.
They were fairy tales;
Of shining armor and pure white gloves.
They were the end and the beginning.
Of a child’s book told time and again.
And they were all just stories.
Believed in,
until they were forgotten…
Yet, still beautiful while they lasted.
They were.

Write what you want to feel.
Write what you can't say.
Even if, at first, you don't really know what it is you're saying.
Just keep going.
Keep feeling.
Let others read your work, and see themselves in it.
Write with that beautiful and chaotic mind of yours.
The one that is tangled and complicated.
That is charming and full of soul.
Then
and only then,
when you have lost yourself among the words in your veins,
do you find the path to your heart.

Breath hitching with the distorted thoughts.
Spiraling out of near comprehension.
Some looping and tightening like a noose.
Others snapping with speedy progression.
They tug at memories of mistakes.
Drawing them in like old friends.
While ripping apart images of smiles.
Leaving them dangling with frayed ends.
I slip my fingers between strands of hair.
Cupping my skull with violent hands.
My descent increases like rising tides,
When all I really want to do is land.