The light bulbs
Of the body
They can give
And take away light
But always burn the
Brightest in the
Darkest Rooms

The shape of her body
Sits still in my sheets
Long after she is gone
I bury my face into my pillow
Where the perfume still lingers
I dream of her next to me
Playing connect the dots
With my freckles
Twirling my hair around
Her fingers
Chest pulsating against mine
The silence is calming
And then she is gone

Insomnia
We meet again
With your clammy hands
Wrapped neatly around
My skin
Conversations with the ceiling
Sharing secrets with the shadows
The night takes me in
But won’t let me out

Of all the things
I should have avoided
Her lips were the first
But the way my name
Rolled off her tongue
How could I resist?

She was a shipwreck
Her body couldn’t handle
The sorrowful sea
And board by board
The tide took her away
From me

Broken hands built the house
Broken bottles buried the owner

And as we sit across the table
From each other
I realize that instead of this
Exam review
I’d much rather study you

My body is a lighthouse
Desperately, searching
For her in the darkness
Hoping that the yellow
Light leads her back to me

I wanted to feel whole again
But I chose to walk away
Because, I’d rather have holes
In the soles of my shoes
Than in my heart

I gave you the most
Fragile parts of me
And asked that you
Handle them with care
Because what is
Broken can't always
Be repaired.

I fell for a girl with a glass heart
And watched as she  
Slowly fell apart
Picking up the pieces
And putting her back together
Meant knowing that she
Wouldn't do the same
No matter how much I helped her
Despite the cuts she left
On my hands
I wouldn't have wished
For he to be made of gold
Because instead of being
A caring canvas
I would have been the coal
Sacrificed in order
To make her glow

I always wanted to live
A life worth living
But I feel myself
Following in your
Footsteps
I denied the possibility
Of being diagnosed
With depression
I always allowed
Breathing room from
Anxiety attacks
But my insecurities
Swallowed me
Leaving just a shadow
Of who I used to be

A fine line separates
Happiness from sadness
And I have one foot
Stuck in both of them
Almost like standing
On the border of
Two different states
These feelings are
Close together, but
Feel worlds away.

1.  I don’t believe in ghosts
    But to her, I've become one.

2. The scars on our skin
    Tell the stories we could
    Never tell.

3. You don’t have to be a
    Millionaire to be rich at heart.

4. To love yourself
    Is to wear your
    Skin proudly.

5. I could write a book
    Filled with questions
    That I will never get
    The answers to.

6. When I die, I hope
    My deathbed is comfortable
    Because, I want to rest in peace.

I was told that god
Is the father for the
Fatherless
Well, he has a lot in
Common with my father
Because, they both
Abandoned me when
I needed them the most

The history of our skin
Remains the same
Because our scars tell
The stories we could
Never tell
But when they heal
I’ll cut all ties to the past
And live in the present

Learn to live your own life
Before you teach someone else
How to live theirs

I know that words
Shouldn’t hurt me
But you’re mouth
Is a loaded gun
And every bullet
Has my name on it

I never believed in ghosts
Until she told me to move on
I’ve been sticking to the shadows
Of the past, trying to bring to life
What once made me feel so alive
I often wonder, when love fades away
Did it ever exist in the first place
Or was it the ghost of something
That died long ago

Everyday, I tell myself
That I'm over you
But when I fall asleep
At night, my dreams
Tell me otherwise

It’s ironic that I
Grew up to do all
The things I said I
Would never do when
I was younger

The saddest part about suicide
Is that you’ve died long before
Taking your own life
And because of that
You decide to go
One step further

I like to fall in love with strangers
Because it teaches me to be
Comfortable in the idea of giving a
Piece of myself to someone new

I’m no stranger to disappointment
And I know this takes a lot of trust
But I’ll never see them again
So, I know they won’t let me down

I craved the sunlight on my skin
But the day had come to
An unsavory end
The night didn’t need
An introduction
I was all too familiar
With the loneliness
Disguised in darkness
I need light in my life
To survive

If I had known that
You’d build a broken home
I wouldn’t have built
This heart made out of stone

Weep with words
And not with tears

Depression visits often

He’s the kind of guy
Who doesn’t wipe his
Shoes before entering
And leaves traces of
Himself through out
The house

He keeps to himself
But you can always
Find him washing down
His doubts with cheap wine
Or writing a love poem
That never gets delivered

When it’s time for him
To leave, he usually
Prolongs his goodbyes, but
When all is said and done
He quietly sneaks out
Without me noticing

Even though he’s gone
I leave a key under the door mat
Because I know he will
Be back soon.

I’ve never met someone
Who could breathe life into me
And take my breath away
At the same exact time
Then I met you

I don't fear death
But I do fear the death of others
I'm a lover of life
But I know it won't last forever
I've come to accept this
When we entered this world
We secretly agreed to die
One of the many rules of life

The words that spill onto these pages
Harm more than they heal

A constant reminder of the lost loves
And the many mistakes we’ve made

But, in order to heal from these wounds
We have to learn to accept them

Our lives are just like books
Filled with numerous chapters
We may not like what’s inside
But turning the page and
Continuing the story
Is the only way to move on

I’ve written numerous
Poems for you
Each and every one
Delicately written

Pictures painted
With words bleeding
From my pen until
The paper is soaked

Yet you cast aside
The pain it is
To arrange
Those words for you

I'm pondering
If pouring
My heart out
Is worth it anymore

Well this poem
Will be torn up
Because you don’t
Deserve it

I wonder
If you ever did

She didn’t believe him
When he called her
Beautiful
She didn’t mind
That the visible notches
Of her spine
Worried him
When he ran his hands
Down her back
He could feel every connection
Wrapped tightly in sinking skin
And despite the imperfections
He still believed
That she was a masterpiece
Crafted for the world to see

Moving on is hard
When you're weighed
Down by a Heavy Heart

When the leaves fell from trees
And littered the empty streets
Leaving summer as a memory
You told me you loved me
And that distance doesn’t matter
When someone means the world to you
I know I have my whole life
To fall in love
But there’s nothing wrong
With getting a head start

Now that the grass is growing
And the birds are singing
You’ve finally realized
That it wasn’t meant to be
You locked this love in a box
And threw away the key
But deep down inside
I still think you love me
Not as much as you used to
But there's something

These words are the stitches that keep me put together.

I entered this world alone; I'll exit the same way.

I miss you
More than
You could
Imagine
And
I’d like to
Imagine
That You
Miss me
Too

Perfection is poison
And you’re slowly killing me

The sea sings a song
Of silence
While the waves wash
Away my worries
And I know I’m
Not alone
For there are many
Men just like me
Captains of ships
Inside bottles
The only escape is to
Sink to the bottom

I play back certain memories
Like movies in my head
To remind me of the times
When I felt alive and not so dead

Even though you’re
975 miles away
I know you will be
My valentine someday

Promise me
When my hands begin to tremble
You’ll place your hand in mine
When my eyes become hollow
You’ll gaze into them
When I’m at a loss for words
You’ll kiss me so the silence
Can speak for the both of us.

Don’t be ashamed
Of your scars
Because I have matching ones

I want to fall asleep
And never wake up
Because the nights
I dream of you
Are the nights
I am at peace

I like poetry
Like a painter likes art
While they make brush strokes
I stand up and try to evoke
Feelings  
I can’t paint a picture with a brush
But I sure as hell can with words
For instance
Some of the most beautiful things
Come from sadness
I’ve seen Poets hold back tears
When talking about lost lovers
I’ve met vagabonds who run
From state to state looking for
A place to call home
I’ve held my baby brother and sister
In my arms while I smile to myself
Knowing that they will have a better
Future than me.
I put these thoughts into poems
Because we use feelings to create
It doesn’t matter if it’s
Poetry, photography or painting
We all have an escape
My favorite artist killed himself
At the age of 29
His only escape
Consisted of starry nights
Wandering in wheat fields
And painting the man he wishes
He could be
Not realizing he had
All of the time in the world
To find his happiness
But It didn’t take much time
For the bullet to enter his chest
Lead penetrating his heart
Where his passion should be
His last words were
The Sadness will last forever
And it does
It feels like an eternity
When depression is clawing your back
Leaving you bruised and scarred
When anxiety comes crawling back
Leaving you broken and breathless
Realizing the person you once were
Is no longer the person you truly are
You’re not the same kid
That your single mother raised
Working night shifts at bars
Where people were shot in cold blood
Because my father decided
That leaving a 19-year-old woman
With a newborn was a good idea
You’re not the same teenager who prayed
To a god every night and ended up
Being even more alone than before
I don’t believe in hell
But if it’s real then I’m already living in it
You soon begin to realize
That life doesn’t owe you anything
So you try to make the best of it
Even when you’re dying inside
Because life is about memoires
Sometimes you have to stop and smell the roses
Watch the sunset and sunrise
You have to travel to the places
You dreamed of seeing as a kid
To remember the innocence
Fall in love with someone that
Leaves a fire in your chest
That cannot be extinguished
Because for once
Waking up will be okay
If they’re in your arms
Learn to live your own life
Before you teach somebody else
How to live theirs
Learn to love yourself
Learn to live freely
And don’t be afraid to explore
You have to be lost
To eventually find where
You belong anyway
So don’t rush to your destination
There’s so much to see along the way

I'm afraid of heights
But I'd fall for you

You have to be lost
To eventually find
where you belong