A seemingly ancient photograph
Capturing a perfect moment in time
Eternalising our friendship
Sealing us in our prime

A photo taken in the spur of the moment
As an attempt to follow a new "selfie" trend
Within the seats of a worn down minivan
We all sat and laughed as friends

At the young ages of 11 and 12
Still quite young and naive
We drove around the endless fields
Laughing and singing as we were free

We called ourselves The Gang
Though we rarely did anything wrong
The six of us were so close back then
It was the only time I felt like I belonged  

Stopping the car behind the willow tree
With its branches drooping low
Rays of sunlight shining down
But at that time we didn't quite know

Let's take a picture

A black iPod touch
Was the thing to capture this moment
we all posed with the peace sign
In time we are forever frozen

This picture that at the moment meant nothing
It was all just meaningless fun
But now we see that during that time
It was the last day that we were together as one

Our lives have all gone different ways
In complete opposite directions
We haven't seen each other in years
We no longer hold that same connection

The photograph sits within my room
My most treasured possession I own
etched into the bottom of the frame
The words that we once promised

We'll meet again someday

Its like being in a box
A cube made of glass
looking out at the world and thinking
how could i possible last?
I wanted to die in that moment
Returning to nothing instead
Being replaced isn't quite so pleasant  
I would be better off dead
I wanted to leave this world
I've tried once to escape
But that didn't end too well
I was like a child screaming out ****
Death seemed so nice
So silent and precise
This whole thing could be over
With just a single slice
My mind filled with them
The friends i held so dear
I was there everyday with them
and my heart filled with fear
I stopped them from doing this
Listening to their woes
But now that i've lost my mind
not a single one shows
Not once did they realise
Not once did they know
Because clearly if they were true friends
then surely they would impose
A hug, a hand or even a word of goodbye
They just up and left, taking off to the sky
My love, My world, I gave everything they asked
But simply where that got me was just being outcasted
Who am I?
What am I?
Simply what do you want?
I know I'm not the brightest but I just merely care a lot
I'm done
It's over
That is what i thought
I'll see you at my funeral then lets see who's distraught

It's like poison
Toxic, deadly and addicting
Coasing through my body
Clouding my mind
Taking over

Its consuming me
Within this detrimental thing called love
An Unstoppable force
Thats made its way into the deepest crevices of my heart

Its burning my lungs
Suffocating, tightening its grip
Firmly planted down
And unwilling to let go

A hallucinogen, stimulant
Drug trip made for two
Infused within my soul
Glowing with a venomous hue

Its posion is bitter sweet
The promise of affection drawing me in
Filling me with contentment
Before the consequences set in filling me with resentment

Its intoxicating
An endless haze of love, destruction and despair
A drug that ive become reliant on
The pain and suffering to prove that i am there

Allowing me to reach my high
Happiness and never ending bliss awaits
Though with every high comes a even worse low
Its leaving me on the ground, greif ridden and despondent
Desperatly yearning for what was

Stuck on repeat
In the same mindless cycle
Drawn in by the same toxic poison
Merely by a different name

My addiction called Love

They say love finds you
The moment you look away
But I dont believe that nonsense
Still I'll wait every single day

They say that true beauty
Cannot be seen
But I'll still sit here changing
Myself seam by seam

They say that friends
Will simple come and go
But that won't stop me
From refusing to let them go

They say that memories
They are the sweetest things
But they aren't as pleasant
As spreading your own wings

They say that life
Is what you make of it
To keep working till the end
We can't simply quit

Thats what they say
To you each and everyday
But the question is
What do you say?

When I awake in the morning
You're the first thought on my mind
Going through each day
Wishing you would be mine

Planning dates within my head
And places I would like to bring you
Little things to show my love
Whenever you feel blue

And a smile graces my face
With a simple text from you
And I hope that messages from me
Bring happiness to you too

And at night I lay awake
As my mind refuses to sleep
Its constantly thinking of you
I've fallen in far too deep

All I can think about is you
As it seems I've fallen
But thats not such a bad thing is it?

Berry Boo my lovely
Fly back to me
Return to the fields of honey
Cross the river of gold

Berry Boo my darling
Its nice to see you again
Its has been far too long
Due to this pouring rain

Berry Boo my sweetheart
This round was far too rough
It has barely been a week gone by
But we both have had enough

Berry boo my Princess
We both really are such pains
We overreact and fight over things
But it seems we are bound in chains

Berry Boo my dear
I love you so dearly so
History keeps repeating itself
As then next time we will surely know

Like fragments of a shattered broken heart
I've lost my way, and I am falling apart
Yet somehow in this strange unerving mystery
I've found myself at the shores of an endless sea

Running through my dreams afraid of turning
Unwilling to let go of my fragile past
I push myself to the point of breaking
It seems that I not nearly way to fast

I hold myself at night with these tears streaming
I struggle to get past as the dark nights fly by
Unable to face this cruel trick called reality
But i'll keep trying till I reach the clear blue sky

I wish to be held like any other
I wish to be freed from this chained down cage inside
I wish to escape from this never ending scene
But the fates keep telling me I'm far to naive

Standing on the dreaded battlefields
Bullets littering without a moment to lose
Wounded but alive, unlike the rest who died
Though I'll always be haunted by their memory

Crimson red dripping down gently
dying the petals that are scattered down
I'll raise my gun, I'll fire another round
Until the blood in my veins finally run dry

I claim I'm doing it for my friends
To protect the life I live
Are they standing by my side
With all their heads held high

They are hidden down below
As soon as the whistle blows
And I'm forced to march on
To continue this fight

You can't trust anybody but yourself
Thats the way I've been born and raised
At times I forget, get swayed and carried away
But it won't be long before I snap out of that haze

So to the dear world please forgive me
To the people I call my friends too
I cant trust a single soul in this hell
From the beginning I always knew.

Its been
Days, weeks, months
Since you left me behind
Left me head over heels in "love" with you
You had me thinking that i knew you so well
That I was the best thing in your life
That I was the only thing that you trusted

You had me thinking that you loved me
that you truly did care for me
that our countless messages meant something
that our phone calls every night weren't just out of boredom

You had me thinking that I was worth something
that for once I could be somebodies that person
that every time you walked me to class
and every time you waited for me at the end of the day was because you needed me

I want to scream that you used me
that you lied and it all meant nothing
that you manipulated and stayed cause I was the only one there
that I wasn't the one who made myself believe something that isin't even there

Its been so long since we talked or seen each other
All the reality and words of what people say all start to make sense
I trusted you with everything, took your word above all
But I wonder if that was the right choice to make
If I should have trusted my other friends after all

But your gone now, Theres no need to stress
All the words and things no longer hold any meaning
You don't care about me,  You don't even bother to text
My hollowed out heart doesn't bother anymore
Not after its been broken to it's very core

Sometimes I close my eyes at night
All I can see is your cheerful face
Grinning and laughing, as you did when we were friends
The memories we shared, things like watching our show together, falling asleep in the middays sun and playing video games till we finally won.

And I know that in these moments I was truly happy
I was content, in love and I wished for nothing more.
But as I lay awake I can't help but wonder
Did you really not love me, did you find me a bore?

Was it all really a lie?
Did you truly not care?
Was I nothing more than just a person who happened to be there?
Cause I loved you, loved you so much that it ******* hurt
I blindly gave you everything till I was completely stripped bare

So do enlighten me
Do tell me blunt and clear
Tell me your true feelings
For the whole world to hear

I've been suffering in silence
Not allowing myself to shed a tear
I refused to believe that my love meant nothing
The very thought fills my soul with fear

Tell me so I can cry
Tell me so I can finally move on
Tell me the truth behind it all
Tell me so that I can stop loving you

Cause in my heart you are still
My beloved pedestal boy

Sharp and Cold
Those glass like eyes
Once you fall under their gaze
There is no way to resist.

Cry me a river
Of insure little tears
Sparkling like diamonds
Filled with your greatest fears
Let it glisten, Let it flow
Down your cheeks
To the land below
Salty to the tongue
Taste it upon your skin
Be still my little darling
He's watching with a grin
Thriving off your sadness
He pushes the knife further in
Prying on your weakness
To unveil deeper sins
Sins that have been locked away
Beneath the facade of a smile
Nothing bothers the angel dear
Even those who are vile
Emotions make you weak
Nobody wishes to see the evil
Disgusting feelings of envy
That you so dearly keep
Rage and jealousy
Hide them away
Calm and gentle
Let them stay
For nobody will love
A girl who displays
Her heart boldly upon her cheek
They will fire their arrows at the rate
Of the time it takes for your heart to break
Run and hide with all your might
Do all you can but fight
Foxes they play
Snakes they bite
In the den you are trapped
You know that I'm right
And while in the home of the serpents
You will come to know
That the faces you loved
Are the first to go
And its then you will see
That surrounded by people
Is the moment you realize
You are truly alone

For nobody is willing to enter the den of those that break
As all the friends you loved turned out to be that of those very same snakes

-

In my dreams I see you
You love and hold me tight
Whisper sweet nothings into my ear
And tell me everything is alright

You listen to my woes
Yet with you I feel no stress
As within your warm embrace
I am finally allowed to rest

Your sweet lips on mine
As we share a gentle kiss
A hickey or maybe more
Ah, this is pure bliss

We run through different scenarios
Your confession, Our love and tears
And together no matter what
You are still willing to hold me dear

Everything is perfect
I laugh and smile so bright
Being with you brings me delight
So I hold on so tight

But when reality comes knocking
And I wake up from my dream
I look to see I'm all alone
And the tears flood like a stream

In this world you dont love me
I'm nothing more then a friend
No hugs and kisses adore me
Those are only for your girlfriend

My unrequited love
Oh, how it hurts me so
I can only wish you could love me
So back into those dreams I go

In dreams, they tell us to live out free
Let our hearts rage on, flooding like seas
And with you by my side, the warmth ignites
Alighting a fire so far, the sun begins to shy

Little side glances, and bursting grins
Laughter and happiness, all of these things
From stolen kisses of many, as regards to many firsts
Hickeys and bite marks, it's all rather perverse

Through the sun that hits your eyes, a reflection as clear as sky
Crystalized in a memorizing blue, within happiness it lies
Breathing out another sigh, filled with contentment
Entranced by the one in front of me, How fleetingly pleasant

Entangled in bedsheets, within each other's arms
Fingers entwined together, How can a boy hold such charms?
Tracing the patterns on your skin, mapping out constellations
Running fingers through your hair, we've created a firm foundation

And in his presence, I am a child bubbling with glee
While my shield relinquish but refuse to let me free
Insecurities creep and that voice begins to echo,
Though not a moment of doubt is buried deep below

Just fear of abandonment that I can't help but shake
Fear that my heart loves you much more then I can take
And gazing into those orbs, that shine so true
With ever sweet words, that make me feel far less blue

Captivated by the you, that stands before me today
With every flaw and imperfection, I still decide to stay
As being perfect doesn't matter, as long as your enough for you
And as long as your heart beats wild and decides to stay true

And fleeting moments pass us by, such a gorgeous temptation
Though being with you alone is enough, such an amazing sensation
The future is a mystery as far as anybody can see
Though, in the end, we'll hear its great unfinished symphony

In the meantime, we will lay, in the darkness of night
Two childish lovers only at the beginning of this fight
Creating memories of many, regardless of our scars
Finishing each other's sentences and Falling like the stars.

Compressing my heart
Between the palms of your hands
Tear it into tiny bits
Until nothing else stands
Repeating the words under breath
Love me, Love me not
Debating with your heart
Careful not to get caught
Take heed in my words
And my cries in the night
Spew apologies with guilt
Don't take it too light
Distinguish for yourself
Between right and wrong
Boundaries and respect
Aren't particularly strong
Know my pain on the surface
Change nothing within existence
Haunted feelings unkept
Cause me to grow distance
Decide is what I want
But choice isn't simple
I won't be the one I know
Unfair and Unjust
Knowing too well
Hatred or rejection
I wish not to know
In silence, I shall keep
As feelings begin to grow
Wishing to love you endlessly
And for you to do the same
But I know its hopeless
As your voice still calls her name
A ghost he says
Floating about
An exorcist I say
Is what I'd love to shout
But I know more and more
That's impossible, I doubt
I just want your love with no strings attached
My heart already feels it, But I can't allow it to be unlatched
Secured in the vault, unwavering at its bolts
It can't, I won't allow it to be released
Not until the ghost is gone
Though that won't ever happen
Unless I want to become scorned.
I care beyond the brink of love
I don't wish to leave
But this pain that constantly echos
Causes me to grieve

Please...
Just don't hate me for feeling this way.

-

Hold out your hand
Open your palm
Close your eyes
Remain calm

Trust in me
Let me guide your way
Allow me to remind you that
Everything is okay  

Face each day with your head held high
For Ill stand with you, always by your side
no matter what they say, no matter what they do
My loyalty will forever remain with you

So turn a blind eye to their snickers and snares
Mute their voices as the rumors air
Forget about them for nobody truly cares
You are your own person, don't bother with their complicated affairs

Your better off living with just me and you
As going through highschool makes anyone feel blue
The rumors, the lies, the tears you will cry
Its really not worth it, so dont bother to try

It may look like its all fun and games
Being so popular, they all know your name
But everything happeneds to come at a price
The cost is your happiness, are you willing to sacrifice?

keep on your toes if you do make this choice
every little secret and promise, they won't hesitate to voice
Your standing in a minefield, You will try to escape
But careful each move as we don't want you to break

Are you their new toy or a friend?
Its really hard to tell
But play your cards right
And it won't be complete hell

But why put yourself into such a gamble
Just for those "friends" that are particularly fragile
Who needs that popularity and all of those parties
They are merely a congress of dressed up barbies

So keep your peaceful life as it is now
Friends you can trust, life so carefree
No matter what you face,
You will still have me

So blend back in, live a normal life
You don't need to pretend to live a happy life
Acting skills aren't required when surrounded by real friends
So stop, Don't pretend.

Dont worry about them
what the people have to say
Its me and you together
No matter what I'll stay

I'll help fight your battles
I'll help lead the way
You don't need to change yourself
Because of things that they say

I love you so much
More then the stars in the sky
So trust in me
As I wouldn't dare to lie

Like a brightly colored bird
She's flaunting her feathers
In futile attempts
trying to make herself feel better
Luring them in
So gentle and soft
While the fallen look on
And I can't help but scoff
Another victim to the bird
Who pecks away at their lives
Yet they can't see through
All her truths and the lies
No sanity in the cycle
Just more victims and tears
I've grown numb to these actions
Which have repeated through the years
At one moment their everything
They seem to get lost
But by the end they sit silently
Weighing up the cost
And cry to me they will
And comfort them I say
Its not the first time this has happened, don't worry you'll be okay
And she sings and she sings
Lulling all around
Fake or reality?
All I hear is noise filled sound
As I've grown tired of the songs
That this bird seems to squark
Oh pardon me, I mean sings
You see an elegant beauty dancing
I see a headless chicken prancing
And with all the damaged its caused
I think its about time we had some chicken soup.