I’m not empty.
It’s not that I don’t feel anything.
The exact opposite.

I feel so much.

So much I get desensitized to my own emotions.
They flow around like water in every corner of my body.
Mixing in with my blood until there is no cell untouched.

It used to be a gentle lake.
But now It’s an ocean.
So all I can do is sit here and pretend that I’m a puddle.
Just like everyone else.

The blisters formed and bubbled, Your skin began to burn,
Desperately trying to extinguish all light,
While feigning such concern.

Smothering out the flame, cutting off the air,
the charring smell is making me sick.
No, It's pretending that you care.

Your hands once so soft, have now grown callus,
harden from the "home" you built around me,
Each brick tainted with malice.

Gasping tightly around my ever failing, feeble form,
Looking around frantically,
only to be met with your cloudy eyes filled with scorn.

I lay there in the ashes, the remnants of me,
Darkened sky of smoke surrounding my vision,
All thats left is seared debris

And that is where you left me.






But that is where I refuse to stay.

~

Almost like it was etched into my soul
My mind refuses to forget.

I see you.
I see your smile.
And ****.
It consumes me again.

Dripping with that sickeningly sweet nectar
Reviving that lingering taste of honey on my tongue
Sparking that chaos that breeds like wildfire
For that foolish love that I once clung

Intoxicated by that familiar scent
Inebriating my mind of incoherent thought
Indulging in this irresistible poison
All sense of caution came to nought

That smile.
That ******* smile is what does me in

Blooming like honeysuckles on a vine
Vibrant in colour, alluring to the eyes
these blossoms aren't all new, just dormant for a time
lying in wait for the worst timing to arise

Entwining itself into the crevices of my heart
Spreading across my body it twirls and intertwines
Desperately trying to pull away as I might
But its futile against the ever tightening vines

You smile at me

Halting my breath but for a moment
As if encapsulating us in time
It feels almost as if the world is composed
completely of just you and I








I'm unable to resist


-

I want to drown in this intoxicating feeling called you

Taking me deeper with each wave of blue

further and further you drag me out to sea

Weighing down my body so I cannot be free

To the point that I can no longer see the land

nor touch the surface or feel the sand

Sink me deeper into your abyss of you

Drag me down into these feelings so true

Swallowing all that I am, all that I know

Let the vast ocean take me real slow

Filling my lungs till my chest burns in pain

till my heart begins to scream, and the oxygen leaves my brain

Consume my very being with your saltwater taste

I'll take it all in, it won't go to waste

Floating within that gorgeous ocean of blue

Drown me in this existence called you.

~

It doesn't cost you a thing


~