In your vacant look
Dwells my end.


-- Eleanor

And maybe we're all unknown little Van Goghs
Self mutilating our hearts
In the name of love.


--Watercolour

First shot of *****
You are not here.
Second shot of *****
I forget about you.
Third shot of ******
I **** someone new.


-- Eleanor

Your eyes fixed on the screen
and mine on you.
You're watching a story
And I am, too.


F.Z.N

We are apart
Like a broken heart.


F.Z.**N

When I met you the soil was wet
Underneath cloudy skies
And so were your eyes.

Now it's the summer,
everything is dry
You must say goodbye.


F.Z.**N

You greatest Know It All
Why did you take she?

Why why why?

Do you love me
Or the fact I love you?
Do you want me
Or only my love?

Do you like how I make you feel
Or how you make me feel?

I wonder,
Will your love stop
After mine does
Or will it go on?

Is it something about me
Or is it all about you?

Just tell me baby,
Why do you love me?


F.Z.N

Will you ever remember
The Spring times
We swallowed butterflies so often
Our stomachs refused to digest them
And the cold Winter days
The sun hid behind the clouds
And cried heavy rain
Utterly jealous of the heat
We made each other feel.

Will you ever remember
The early mornings
You swore
Your love was pure
And each time
You promised me eternity

Because this is not what I see
Nor is it what you want of me.


F.Z.N

and it is in the very loss of hope
that lucidity comes


--Watercolour

If I had been born without a heart
I would have still fallen in love with you.


F.Z.**N

We haven't talked in a while
that's right.
I wonder,
if  you ever think back
of those lazy hours
where silence felt at ease
and we laid in bed
where our bodies were entwined
yet our thoughts never rhymed.

I wonder,
if you ever wonder
if I wonder,

I wonder,
if you ever remember
that I remember,

I wonder,
if I'll ever see you again...

We haven't talked in a while
one day I am going to die
and you aren't going to be surprised...


-- Eleanor

if you are the christmas tree
i am ashes in his chimney

it's not the same, is it?


--Watercolour

Wooden hands
Bruising random shapes
On my bare thighs.
Wooden hands
Leaving me covered
In rainbow lies.

And when wooden hands
Cross my mind,
They come in the form
Of sunshine.


F.Z.N

Big loud words,
Never heard.


-Watercolour

Black as coal
White as snow
These are words
We all know.


F.Z.N

Don't laugh,
You are next.


F.Z.**N

Our minds collapse at the speed of fire
Spreading in the dry forest of our pasts
The dungeons melt into one
And my soul is not mine alone
Now that we've met, it's ours.

You speak the words my mouth hungers for
I seek the moon which longs for your howls
Day and night
At night, alone,
I know you're home.

Burning with desire and lust
You look at me with fiery eyes

Where does the light come from
And where does it go.

I don't know.


-- Eleanor

In your embrace
A new sun rose
From the darkness
That kept us away.
I opened my eyes
And saw you,
The day was born.


-- Eleanor

Of course your eyes are empty,
of course I can see through them
and read your soul
just to find out you don't love me
any more.


F.Z.N

What kills me the most
Is that your forever
Never quite matched mine.


F.Z.**N

Your mother is sad, Adam.
I bumped into her the other day.
She was walking out of the supermarket
With a dozen wine bottles
Inside of a large paper bag.
And she was just a woman
With a smiling face
And a crying heart
Who was never going to see her son
Again.


F.Z.**N

I spoke to my soul about love
She said, do not question it
Do not ignore it.
I resorted to my heart,
Guess what happened.
It skipped a beat
And I was reborn.
I asked scientists and doctors
And people who knew drugs
They said, it's all chemicals
I shouldn't bother myself with
They said I'm too strong
To let it ruin me.
But when you and I
Got under your blankets
And I told you I loved you
You said nothing.


F.Z.N

No one can tell
The hour
Or the day
You will never see them
Again.

So love them,
Just love them
While you have the time.


F.Z.**N

the zeal is upside down
i chase the dark sides
not of the moon
not of the story
but of you
and me.


-- Eleanor