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249 · Feb 2022
Rejection
SableNocturne Feb 2022
I'm tired
I'm tired of caring
I'm tired of pretending like I don't care
I'm tired of pretending like it doesn't hurt
I'm tired of pretending like it doesn't matter
I'm tired of hiding how I truly feel
I'm tired of keeping it all in because of fear.
248 · Nov 2018
Worst Enemies
SableNocturne Nov 2018
Her mind is a wonderland of endless thoughts
Her worst enemies are not humans
Not any creatures
But they’re
Stress,
Anxiety,
Pressure,
Depression,
and Failure.
242 · Feb 2020
Wild Fire
SableNocturne Feb 2020
She breathes passion
She’s a wild fire
Overflowing with untamed emotion
Magic slips from her fingertips
Creating a masterpiece with words.
238 · Nov 2018
Keep On Shining
SableNocturne Nov 2018
Darling,
please keep on shining,
no matter how dark it gets,
the world needs more light.
237 · Nov 2018
Prisoner
SableNocturne Nov 2018
It’s one of those nights
When my mind is jumbling thoughts
I cannot shut my eyes
I cannot hold my thoughts captive
For i am their prisoner.
235 · Nov 2018
Untitled
SableNocturne Nov 2018
Loving you
is by far
the scariest thing
I’ve ever done.
219 · Apr 2019
I’m Getting There
SableNocturne Apr 2019
I’m getting there
Step by step
Breath after breath
I’m reaching there
To the place
Where i once was
Not a stranger to myself.
208 · Dec 2018
No One But You
SableNocturne Dec 2018
“I’ll never let anyone hurt you”



But you let yourself.
204 · Aug 2019
Untitled
SableNocturne Aug 2019
Some people grow
and some don’t change.
Some people don’t stay
and some are stuck in one place.
Some people are repeatedly visiting the past
and some are impatiently waiting for the future.
Some people are living in the moment
and some are thinking about tomorrow.
184 · Nov 2018
The Death of Me
SableNocturne Nov 2018
I dug up my grave
in your heart
the day i met you
for i knew
you’d be
the death of me.
178 · Jun 2019
How Poetry Gets Me
SableNocturne Jun 2019
Lost
in thin pages
Dazzled
by dancing letters
Tiptoeing
on the verge of my heart
Mischievously
missing with my heartbeats
Making me feel
all the feelings I keep hidden.
176 · 4d
Dark Phoenix
No tears in her eyes now
Just a deadly, cold stare
That aims to ****,
A little smile forming
On the corner of her mouth
For she knew
She was strong enough to
Get back up on her feet
As she crawled out of Hell
For the millionth time..
She knew she wasn’t gonna let
Something like that
Easily take her out
Even when it felt like
She was going to bleed
To death..
Her last breath
Was hanging onto her lips
Yet she found the strength
To keep on going
To keep on moving
Than let herself burn
Over and over again..
For the price she had to pay
Of the poor choices she made..
Only to rise from the ashes
Followed by her shadows..
And who would’ve thought
That this time around
Her own demons
Would be the ones
Saving her life..
You will spill your guts
They will lick every drop of blood
While you tried to save them
You killed yourself
While you tried to be there for them
You abandoned yourself (who you are)
in the name of “Love”;
(conditional, sacrificial, transactional love)
Because you grew up seeing the danger
of fighting back for your life
You chose silence because
it kept you small,
it kept you safe.
You grew up watching mom tolerate pain
Mistreatment and disrespect
and you thought that was love
That it had to hurt,
not heal
That it was tough,
not soft
That it had to be painful
To be something endured
Otherwise it wouldn’t carry meaning
Because someone that brings stillness,
Stability and peace feels like “boredom”
If you weren’t intoxicated by the highs and lows
You feel nothing
Thinking that feeling something is better
You associate calmness with numbness
But it's only your body and nervous system
Coming out of survival-mode
You run towards the very thing
You should stay away from
Because it feels familiar
The inconsistencies, neglect,
Emotional unavailability,
Gaslighting, manipulation,
Love-bombing, affection withholding,
Silent treatment, blame shifting,
The ups and downs..
It was programmed in your little brain
That to earn love you had to suffer
Until one day you wake up
and realize that is not love
That is survival,
That is not love,
That is attachment,
That is not love,
That is trauma bond.
and now you have to rewire,
Reprogram your mind
As if you were a newborn
and what if i told you
That what you went through
Was the only way
That you would learn
What real, genuine, safe love
Looks like
or everything that it isn’t.
But healing doesn’t come with a manual
Nobody tells you how long it takes
nor the steps to get there
They only say:
“Healing isn’t linear”
That it could take months or years
But right now all that matters is that
You broke that vicious cycle
and you no longer hold on to old beliefs
You’re no longer trapped in the illusion of it all.
"In Dr. Orloffs book, The Empaths Survival Guide talks about the 7 types of energy vampires to be aware of if you’re an empath.
1. The Narcissist
2. The Rageaholic
3. The Victim
4. The Drama Queen or King
5. Controlling Critics
6. The Non-stop Talker
7. Passive Aggressive People
Energy vampires are attracted to the openness and loving hearts of empaths and this can leave us emotionally, mentally, and physically depleted. Take care of yourself and place boundaries when needed.

1. The narcissist
- acts as if the world revolves around them
- inflated sense of importance and entitlement
- need to be center of attention
- requires endless praise
- must compliment them to get their approval
- they use their intuition to manipulate and achieve their goals
- little to no capacity, for unconditional love
- if you disagree with them they become ice cold and withhold love, or will give silent treatments

2. The Rageaholic
- deals with conflict by accusing, attacking, and controlling
- will yell to make a point (empaths cant tolerate yelling)
- they behave poorly around loved ones
- Rageaholics traumatize empaths by beating down their positivity and self worth.

3. The victim
- energy vampires with a victim mentality drain empaths with their “the world is against me” attitude
- they don’t take responsibility for the problems that happened in their life
- other people are always the cause of their distress
- empaths fall into the compassionate caretaker role trying to solve all of the victims problems."

4. The drama queen or king
- overloading with nonstop dramas
- these dramas impose too much information and simulation for empaths to process
- drama is a drug they become addicted to
- they don’t get rewarded when we don’t react to their dramas.

5. Controlling Critics
- offer unsolicited opinions
- nitpick about the things you’re doing wrong
-ongoing nit picking can drain an empath.

6. The non stop talker
- endless verbal assault
- trap you to recount their life stories without pausing for a breath
- moves in on personal space while talking
*nonstop talkers don’t respond to your nonverbal cues. Simply looking impatient or restless doesn’t work. You must interrupt them as hard as this may be to do.

7. Passive aggressive people
- express their anger with a smile
- they sugar coat hostility
make excuses for why they can’t fulfill a commitment
- known for making sarcastic comments saying “can’t you take a joke?”
- they sulk when they don’t get what they want but claim nothing is wrong *these are confusing messages for empaths who are much more direct*
"
-by Whitney Mangrum.
157 · Jan 2020
Home
SableNocturne Jan 2020
Poetry is my home
Poetry is where I belong
in words I live
in words I breathe
I run
I tremble
I fall
I sink in deep dark ink
I crawl
I hold onto words
I get up
and I start again
to live
to breathe
and break
through poetry.
157 · Mar 2022
Untitled
SableNocturne Mar 2022
I, can't let this happiness consume me
I, can't let myself be too happy
I, can't stand another heartbreak
I, can't let myself be disappointed again.
152 · Feb 2022
Untitled
SableNocturne Feb 2022
Hold on to yourself so tight
You can never allow it to fall apart.
152 · 5d
A Miracle
my heart aches
with hope
for a miracle,
for a safe, calm space
one that holds with care
one that welcomes with love
softness and a tender touch
one that sees behind the mask
one where there is no hiding
only acceptance and guiding
only freedom and flying
without expectations
without conditions
one that simply
lets me be.
150 · Nov 2018
Broken
SableNocturne Nov 2018
Our brokenness
Don’t make us any less
Humans.
142 · Mar 2022
Untitled
SableNocturne Mar 2022
Pretty face
Cursed eyes
Neglected heart
Drunk mind.
130 · 2d
Wingless Bird
they gave me freedom
only to trap me
and put me in a cage..
they taught me how to fly
only to clip away my wings..
they opened the door
and showed me the way
only for me to tremble and fall
letting them carry me
and bandage the harm
they have caused.
127 · Feb 2020
In Love With...
SableNocturne Feb 2020
I’m in love with
What’s left of you
What’s left of us
Shadows in the rust
The rustiness in the dust
The faded taste of lust
Still lingers on my lips.
127 · Jan 2020
She’s taking control..
SableNocturne Jan 2020
Once, he had the power,
Once, men had the power,
Over her,
Her heart,
Her feelings and thoughts.
But now,
She’s stronger,
Now, she’s wiser,
Now, she’s taking back the power.
i’ve cut my chest wide open
as if i could burst out of myself
and leave this body behind
the blood never bothers me
the pain, i barely feel
compared to the weight of
everything i’m carrying
on the inside
it rarely helps
it rarely subsides
the aching emptiness
is only one of the many symptoms
though it makes you wonder
how can something
that doesn’t exist
feel so heavy..
Borderlines get it.
123 · 2d
Hello Old Friend
i relapsed
after months
it was one of the two
that i was bound to reach out to
things that would harm me
in separate ways
one; makes me physically bleed
the other; will leave long-lasting,
unseen damage on my mind
one; will silence my mental agony
the other; will only find ways
to make me feel worse..
one; will heal with time
the other; is a wound that
keeps on bleeding..
both are familiar ways
i used to cope with my pain
but only one of them is
going to take advantage
of my vulnerable state
so it will be you, Blade
and if it comes to it again
i will bleed it out
because that’s how i always coped
there is no other way
that can take away the ache
even for a little while, a moment
it stops my world from spinning
and everything goes silent
i’m calm and relaxed
or too numb to think
what i can’t explain?
is that i don’t feel things
the way normal people do
i don’t feel grief the normal way
it’s ten times the amount
and seeing everyone else
around me feeling okay
only makes me think that
i’m absorbing everyone’s heartache
it is too much to bear
in one heart
in one body
it ***** me into the dark
where nothing but suicidal thoughts
circle around in the back of my head
it makes me want to disappear
it makes me want to
wake up from this nightmare
there is no switch off
so don’t tell me to “just stop”.
~when my grandpa passed away a week ago,
May his soul rests in peace.💙
121 · Jan 2020
Untitled
SableNocturne Jan 2020
I keep finding myself
in the same circle of regrets
stuck in a loop of what ifs
and if things were different
what would’ve happened
and if we were different people
what would’ve happened
and if I hadn’t left
what would’ve happened
and if you hadn’t stayed
what would’ve happened
and if we tried to skip the past, pain and hurt
would we have made it?
120 · Nov 2021
Untitled
SableNocturne Nov 2021
Does it ever go away?
114 · Feb 2022
Be Kind
SableNocturne Feb 2022
you dont need to be pretty
to be likeable
you dont need to be rich
to be admirable
you dont need to be
a king, queen
to be respectable
just
be
kind.
107 · Jan 2020
The power of words
SableNocturne Jan 2020
A couple of words
can heal an aching soul
a hopeless heart
and a restless mind.
103 · Feb 2020
What Hurts The Most
SableNocturne Feb 2020
I didn’t see you
until you saw me
and I didn’t love you
until you loved me
and you didn’t leave me
but I left you
and you don’t look heartbroken
but i do.
93 · Feb 2022
Underneath Your Skin
SableNocturne Feb 2022
𝚈𝚘𝚞’𝚛𝚎 𝚊 𝚠𝚘𝚛𝚕𝚍 𝚘𝚏
𝚐𝚊𝚕𝚊𝚡𝚒𝚎𝚜
𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚜𝚝𝚊𝚛𝚜
𝚑𝚒𝚍𝚍𝚎𝚗 𝚞𝚗𝚍𝚎𝚛𝚗𝚎𝚊𝚝𝚑 𝚏𝚕𝚎𝚜𝚑 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚋𝚕𝚘𝚘𝚍.
93 · 4d
Untitled
sometimes i wish i was
anything but a human being
anything but a creature
that feels everything
on another level
either way too much
or not enough
i’m either on the edge
staring out the window
looking down
trying to run from the flames
and the fire around
or at the very bottom of a low
wondering when the next fall is due
but resting my head
for a moment or two
before it all starts to fall apart again
having to find a way through
to manage how imbalanced
my own coping mechanisms
don’t always work
they cause nothing but
more harm and damage
and yet i appear and show myself
not a single person can guess
what is wrong because
i never give them a reason to
or let them see what goes on
behind the stage
behind the scenes
of a raging storm
invisible enemies
and the battles i daily fight
i hoped that for once
someone would see me
the real me and choose to stay
like i always did with those
who never truly knew me
or cared enough more about me
than what they could get out of me
i still offered love and compassion
they were never worthy of i know
but through thinking i could save them
i was trying to save me
because i don’t know
how to pour all of that into myself
how to give me the very thing
i freely give away to others
not asking for in return..
sometimes i wish i had something
an alive object
that i can place down
all that love into
and watch grow
but it’s never the same as
pouring into another soul..
90 · 1d
Love
You became their puppet,
Their personal one of a kind show,
You subconsciously accepted playing by their rules,
Because you were conditioned from a young age
To fear speaking up, that it often came with a danger.

You voiced out your thoughts and feelings only to be met with Invalidation, anger, gaslighting, emotional immaturity
And toughening up this shell of a human being you were put in
So you learned to swallow your pain and emotions
Because it was safer for the child you once were.

You learned to walk on eggshells, to avoid conflicts,
You created a war within yourself to keep the peace,
You struggled and died in silence, always left alone
To pick up the pieces of the wreckage they leave behind
And try to put yourself back together once more.

Stomping on your heart and calling it "love",
Humiliating, masking insults as jokes
And name-calling behind closed doors,
Chipping away at your self-worth and confidence,
Deflecting when called out on bad behavior,
Making you doubt yourself, sanity and reality.

But love doesn't hurt, love doesn't cost you your voice,
Love heals, love truly listens, love appreciates all of your angles,
Love acknowledges its imperfections,
Love creates a safe space that holds with understanding,
Love doesn't run away from accountability.

Love? doesn't blame others for its own wrong doings,
Love isn't complex, we make it out to be,
Love isn't shaped by trauma and unhealed wounds,
Love just exists, without conditions,
Love costs nothing, it wants your happiness,
Love protects, doesn't force or steal,
Love sets you free, doesn't keep a hold on you.

Love doesn't control, love isn't power,
Love isn't superior vs inferior,
Love doesn't compare or asks to be matched,
Love, loves..in all the ways it knows the pain
Of existing without it.
90 · Jan 2020
To Love Me
SableNocturne Jan 2020
You gave me something
so beautiful
You gave me myself
You made me learn to love myself
in a way
That no one could ever love it
in a way
It would never need others to love it
to feel loved.
89 · Mar 2021
Untitled
SableNocturne Mar 2021
Idon’twannaliveinmyheadanymore
89 · Feb 2022
Untitled
SableNocturne Feb 2022
I will do whatever it takes
To protect my mental peace.
87 · Feb 2022
Naked Truth
SableNocturne Feb 2022
I’m okay with knowing that no one
will ever truly understand me
Even if I screamed my truth
Even if I cried it out loud
Even if I teared open my chest
and said “this is who I really am”
81 · 4d
Untitled
You deserve someone
who sees you,
truly sees you.
Not someone who pretends to care,
Not someone who takes advantage of
your kindness, vulnerability and pure heart.
You deserve to be cherished
for who you are.
You deserve to know
that you’re
irreplaceable,
incomparable
And no one can ever
have a soul like yours.
A spirit
that is worthy
of love and compassion
beyond measure.
The more i gave
The more they took
The more i poured
The more i was ****** dry
The harder i loved
The more hurt, i got
The more i sacrificed
The more i lost
My peace of mind.
69 · 6h
Love
Love should heal
Not feel like
An incurable
Disease.
63 · Feb 2022
Untitled
SableNocturne Feb 2022
The more I’m staying, the more I’m slowly dying
Chocking on my own silence, my soul fading
60 · Feb 2022
Untitled
SableNocturne Feb 2022
I know you're tired
I'm sorry life took such a toll on us
I'm sorry that you have to suffer
I know you're trying your best
you say you're fine but I know you're not
and it breaks my heart to see you like that
helpless yet you're still trying
I only ask of you
that you never stop, trying.
How can you set something free 
that doesn’t belong to you in the first place..
But what if that thing is so desperately wanting to be let go of?

I don’t own this body
I don’t own this face
I don’t own this heart
I don’t own this mind

Do i own my thoughts? 
Do i own my feelings? 
Do i own my energy? 
Do i own my decisions? 
..
Do i own anything 
that makes me, me?
Or am i just a vessel?
treading aimlessly..
59 · Nov 2018
Not A Nightmare
SableNocturne Nov 2018
Fear wrapped me in its web,
Lonely and Vulnerable came into sight,
they whispered, giggled and walked side to side,

sweat crept on my forehead,
for soon I will become
the meal of a monster,

tangled, I lay
counting the seconds away,

whimpering, shivering, quivering

take my soul!, I pray to the Lord
but don't leave me here in the cold,

I open my eyes but I'm not sleeping
and that's how I know I'm not dreaming.
the peace, calm and
quietness terrifies me
when my soul is used to
getting ****** into
chaos, people’s
worlds and minds..
the unfamiliar feels
uncomfortable
to not constantly
await the inevitable
ups and downs,
pulls and push
that come with
being around those
kinds of people who thrive
on creating disorder..
to unlearn everything
i’ve ever been taught
every idea and thought
i’ve built myself on
to survive..to create
a world where i run
towards peace
and not from it
is all i want.
52 · Feb 2022
Untitled
SableNocturne Feb 2022
if pretty is all you see
if brainless is all you're looking for
then you're looking in the wrong direction
before you devour me, get to know me
if you're only in it for the outside
then don't bother trying
masks, laughs, and acts
are all a costume we love to wear
but what really matters
is what's on the inside
what's the point of a body without a brain?
a beauty without a pure heart?
if you're in it for the outside
than you should look elsewhere.
Her hair chopped off, 
Unevenly..
Her bangs,
Messy..
As if she just woke up
Or got rediscovered 
From an old toy box 
Tucked away in the attic..
Her mascara’s smudged 
Under her dark puffy eyes,
As if she’d been asleep 
with leftover makeup 
For centuries..
Only for the heat of the summer 
To creep up on her 
And melt it off of her
Porcelain skin..
She looks drunk.. or high,
Like life’s been ****** 
Out of her eyes,
She’s not sure she’s alive,
She can barely walk properly 
As she’s been lying down, 
Half naked,
All this time,
Wondering where’s the rest 
Of her clothes 
And why her body’s 
Barely functioning..
She stumbles on her way to
The nearest mirror,
Takes a look at herself 
But doesn’t recognize her reflection 
Or what she’d become..
And she gets hit with this
Overwhelming sadness,
Wishes to go back to being
In deep slumber…
Wishes that whoever found her
Would put her right back 
Where she belongs..
In an old, isolated, 
Forgotten, toy box.
45 · Feb 2022
Untitled
SableNocturne Feb 2022
I pray that you find strength
even on the darkest of days
even when there's nothing left to hold onto
even when your world is falling apart
i pray that you continue to find hope
to find joy
in the little things
that bring you peace.
41 · 11h
Self-love
looking back now
i can see the version of me
that always puts others first
that went above and beyond
for ones who wouldn’t do
the same for her..
i can see how much she struggled
and was suffering in silence
i sometimes wondered
if i was the bad guy
but then i look at
the scars on my thigh
and all the pain i kept inside
carrying shame that isn’t mine
for every time i stayed quiet
for every time i was belittled
..called names
and left shattering
trying to put back something
i never broke
chose to cut my own skin
because it was the only way
i could let out the venom
they’ve spilled onto me
than fight back or cause harm
so no..dear self,
you weren’t the villain
when you stood up for yourself
you weren’t the villain when you
owned your truth
when you stopped believing
the lies they fed you on a silver spoon
you stayed because you kept hoping
for a change that never came
for an apology that wasn’t arriving
and you were surviving..
but now it’s time to let go
heal and move forward
because the battles
you’ve fought
and the scars you carry
are no signs of weakness
but strength and resilience
and you’re still here standing
you’re still here learning
you’re still here growing
turning every ache
into a beautiful lesson
to finally see how much worthy
you are of the love, understanding
and kindness..that you pour into
others..there is no one else
more deserving of it
than yourself.
33 · 2h
Disconnect
I want to shut down,
Be put in a coma
For a day, a week 
or a year. 

I want to take a break 
from existing,
Disconnect 
from this stranger 
living in my bones
And this empty world.

— The End —