patchwork girl dreaming piecing together the scraps of silk frayed ribbons of broiderie anglais the tears of velvet darker than midnight squares of sackcloth hessian made to scrape against skin both thick and paperthin
patchwork girl sewn together with a golden thread and a needle finer than hate embroidered edges with floss spun by spiders from clouds of dreams, flower thoughts, starwonders and fragile pockets of maybe hidden beneath morning dew stitches all lose, then too pulled too tight
she is together she is all fallen apart the soft shape of a doll the tender shape of a girl
hold her, not an armful of scraps but something precious, one of a kind couture
The first time I wrote a poem was pure brokenness, where sadness became my relief, and the pain who has crushed me and tore me to pieces gave me comfort. But when I met you, I tried to change my genre into something blissful, something permanent; no more writings about my dark days and empty feelings because knowing you were here beside me and the overwhelming feeling I’d never thought would put me at ease became my inspiration to make something peculiar out of my familiarity. But my hands betrayed me, my mind was in knots that I couldn’t seem to follow. I ran out of words. It felt like a complete derailing of thought where despair defeated me as I could feel this wasn’t for me and had to give up the poetry inside me.
The first time I wrote a poem was pure brokenness and today I’m writing a poem out of it, because the day you leave me drives me into deep-seated words, my hands are dying to be written until my fingers bleed. Things before I was certain of turns blurry, but the only thing I’m sure of is that creating art today gets back my longing into poetry.
I stopped being a poet when you arrived, Today, I’m back at it.
The waves welling Up my throat My stomach full with doubt Constipating despair Irritated by questions As my brain can't comply My reasoning sick And the rhetorics Driving me crazy on what Is the real deal here.
Who am I? Why me? Why all the struggle? Then purpose drops But the questions still Remains unanswered Bewildered at how people Push through suchlike Waves And why?
You know yesterday I actually found a card He once sent me Then reading I discovered, He saw that coming Us breaking up "We may not be making each other aware of our feelings often, but the love we share, is beyond the day to day expressing... Its a feeling that our hearts have taken for granted forever."
Am not sure what I Feel anymore Should it be joy That he hoped that even though now We might part ways That later we will reunite Or he saw that even though Our love was true It was forbidden and The only way out to Protect both our hearts Was to break the bond and hurt To nurse it all our lives.
Its hard to keep breaking Through when all I can do Is try keep up!!!
This breakup sure is contradicting to everything I believe in.
It all started with saying hello and now I barely know you each day grows shorter and I struggle just to grow through the disagreements and anger that find themselves at our door that only seem to flow true the only thing I remember now when you said you hated me is the sad fact that I asked for this and how I still only want you.