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14.9k · Nov 2015
Me Without You
Marisa Lu Makil Nov 2015
If there was a world
Where I lived without you
Had other friends
That would be something new

If there was a world
Where you didn't exist
Would I have a reason
A way to persist?

If there was a place
Where you didn't survive
Or lived somewhere else
Or you weren't alive

If there was a plane
Where you, my treasure
We're taken from me
With all of life's pleasure

I can't say I'd know
Whatever to do
Because, dearest friend
I can't live without you

So do keep on well
And try to survive
I can't live without you
So keep by my side
To my old friend
10.7k · Apr 2015
Uncle
Marisa Lu Makil Apr 2015
My dearest uncle,

Last summer
Was so awesome.
I hadn't seen you in years, and to finally see you again gave me hope.
But you had changed.

Last summer
Was so sad.
I was broken
And I needed you
So
Much.
But you had changed.

Last summer
I grew up.
You had changed
Not for the better
And even though I needed you
I had to learn to cope.
Because you left.

This summer
You came back.
Again.
And things aren't the same.
We both know it
But no one wants to say it.
So I will:
We won't ever be the same.

Last year
You changed
I changed
And neither of us
Will ever be the same.
So we'll have to cope
On our own.

So let's drink to our changes

All of my betrayed love,
Your niece
For a story I am playing with.
7.1k · May 2015
Rainy Day Love Song
Marisa Lu Makil May 2015
On this rainy day
I just want to cry
Not like some others
Who wish they would die

On this rainy day
Just want it to end
*** somehow I thought
He was a Godsend.

On this rainy day
I wish I could weep
And all my troubles
Could roll down my cheeks

On this rainy day
I just want the tears
And just to erase
All the past years

On this rainy day
My emotions scream
And boy do I wish
This was all a dream

On this rainy day
Want someone to hold
Someone who'll love me
Even when I'm old

On this rainy day
A painting's my heart
He graffitid it
And made it his art

On this rainy day
Breath seems like torture
A thing of unknown
Like a new culture

On this rainy day
I just want to cry
But oh pity me
My tear ducts are dry

On this rainy day
I just want to choke
On my wet tears, but
My tear ducts are broke.
I wish I could cry, but all there is is emptiness.
6.9k · May 2015
Trust
Marisa Lu Makil May 2015
Everyone says
That trust
Trust
Is a hard thing to earn.

But really
When you see someone for the first time
Your mind
Tells you whether
Or not
You trust them.

Trusting someone is easy.
Knowing someone is hard.

When I met you,
My dearest uncle
uncle
I knew
Right away
That you were
The greatest
Man
I
Had
Ever met.

I am glad I met you.
Blessings to you, my writing confidante.
When I finally
Compile
All of these thoughts
Into a book,
The book will say
Three pages in
"To uncle Percy
"Thank you for believing in me."
To my great uncle Percy. You read my poetry, and told me I was amazing. "I will buy the first copy when you publish a book of poems" were your exact words. I am so glad I met you. I love you, and I only just met you. Not many can do that.
Thank you.
6.0k · May 2015
"Sweet Dreams..."
Marisa Lu Makil May 2015
"Sweet dreams" is such a
Sweet thing for someone to say
I'm dreaming of you

So yeah, sweet dreams, my
dearest, sweetest companion
When they are of you
2 stanza Haiku
6.0k · Jun 2015
Guy-best-friend
Marisa Lu Makil Jun 2015
Tight hugs
Sitting close
Playful shoves
Eyes closed

Breathing in
Breathing out
Lips are silent
Heart shouts

My guy friend
Is a part of me
A part that you
May someday meet

The time we spend
Is so precious
My favorite memories
Are of us

I guess there's nothing
More to say
I'll think of something
Another day.
To my guy best friend: You never fail to make my day a little better. :)
5.2k · Apr 2015
Coffee and Cigarettes
Marisa Lu Makil Apr 2015
I realized the other day
When I was cleaning the coffee ***
That that was your smell:
Coffee.

Coffee and cigarettes.
4.8k · Apr 2015
Outside
Marisa Lu Makil Apr 2015
Outside
Warm breeze
Birds fly
Thick as thieves
Sun shines
Through the leaves
I want to go outside.

Outside
Fire place
His arms
Around me lace
Through long grass
He will chase
Me-I want to go outside.
4.2k · Feb 2015
Today
Marisa Lu Makil Feb 2015
Muffins in the oven
Music in my headset
Smells wafting through the house
Egg and hash-brown casserole waiting to be made
Silent people sleeping mere feet away.

Today is a good day.
4.2k · Jul 2015
Surface Smiles
Marisa Lu Makil Jul 2015
On the surface
I
Put on a smile
Laugh
Pretend to have fun

On the inside
I
Bite my lip
Cry
Wish there were something I could do
To change how I feel
In the words of someone I love, "sometimes I think I laugh so hard because I really just want to cry." I couldn't have said it better.
4.0k · Feb 2015
Text
Marisa Lu Makil Feb 2015
Pick up my phone
Hm...should I text him?
When does he ever text me?
Put my phone back down.

Pick up my phone.
Want to text him.
When does he ever text me?
Put my phone back down.

He'll text me if he wants to talk to me.
3.9k · Feb 2015
Ghost
Marisa Lu Makil Feb 2015
Not a smile
Not even a glance.
Do I even exist?
I don't know anymore...
I guess in all
The chaos
I just...forgot to be
I forgot
What it's like
To exist.
I want to be real again.
I want to be
Their screams and laughter
Echo 'round me
Piercing my eardrums
Ebbing like an unseen ocean
Quiet
Loud
Quiet
Loud
But alone I sit
At my own table
The memory of how to live
Gradually slipping like water
From my cold
Dead
Fingers
It's all gone.
I can't remember...
I can't remember!
People I once knew
Places I went
All gone
Like stars.
Also like stars
I am here-I know I am-but no one
Can
See
Me.
All the time I watch them live
But all the time
I don't exist
I want to be here
In the existence I can only brush
with my ghostly pale fingers
But never truly touch
Because now
In this sick reality,
That's all I really am:
A ghost.
3.6k · Feb 2015
Nostalgia
Marisa Lu Makil Feb 2015
Nostalgia always
Keeps me awake through the night
I wish it would leave.
First Haiku
3.5k · Jul 2015
Crush
Marisa Lu Makil Jul 2015
Now I know
Why they call it a crush.

When you find out
They love someone else

It crushes you.
Just realized this.
3.4k · Mar 2015
Unfair
Marisa Lu Makil Mar 2015
It is not fair to
Me that good people die and
That bad people live.
This makes no sense to me. People like Rich Mullins die in car crashes-good people. People who are christians, and who love others, and who plan their whole lives around Christ and what he wants. And then people like Amy Grant-terrible people. People who lie about who they really are, and their love for Jesus, people who make the lives of people like Rich hell.
How is this fair?
I don't think it is.
3.2k · Apr 2015
Typhus Camp
Marisa Lu Makil Apr 2015
Army men
City girls
Turned nurse

Hands held over
Slowly-contaminating
Breaths

Mason jar IVs
Cleansing white
Handkerchiefs

Masks
Yellow on white
Death in the air

Blood in my mouth
Hair
Lungs-everywhere

No new people
In months.
We know what it is.

We have Typhus
And it's not going away
Until it has ****** the breath from all of us

Until we are all dead
6 feet under
The ground
Based on a TV show I am currently watching :)
3.0k · Feb 2015
Sorry-Not Sorry
Marisa Lu Makil Feb 2015
I'm sorry I'm too ugly
I'm sorry I'm too pretty
I'm sorry I'm too fat
I'm sorry I'm too thin
I'm sorry I'm smelly
I'm sorry I wear too much perfume
I'm sorry I am poor
I'm sorry I have more spending money than you
I'm sorry you have to look at me daily
I'm sorry I don't call enough
I'm sorry I'm too aggressive
I'm sorry I back down too easily
I'm sorry I'm too smart
I'm sorry I'm too stupid
I'm sorry I'm too quiet
I'm sorry I'm too loud
I'm sorry I'm too lazy
I'm sorry I'm too fidgety
I'm sorry I'm too flirtatious
I'm sorry I'm too boring
I'm sorry I'm overemotional
I'm sorry I don't talk enough
But that's the way I was made, so deal with it.
Sorry, I'm not sorry.
2.9k · Feb 2015
Stay
Marisa Lu Makil Feb 2015
If you stay
I'll never leave
I'll wear my feelings
On my sleeve

If you stay
I'll hold you tight
Tangle our arms
in the night

If you stay
I'll love you forever
Hold your hand
And never sever

The bond we have
And people will say
I'll bet he's glad
He stayed.

If you stay,
I'll love you so
Through the rain
And through the snow.

Stay because I love you.
Stay because I care
Breathing next to you
Is breathing in air.
2.5k · Sep 2015
Stereotypical Crush
Marisa Lu Makil Sep 2015
I'd love to tell you
That when you
Light up
My phone's screen

I smile

And smile.

That when
You message me first
It makes me feel so special
Like you want to speak to me

That hugging you
When we see each other
Makes my heart flutter

That loving you
Is so much more
Than just a longing

Because I think you are The One

But I can't.

Because then you'd know.
This probably won't get any likes or anything just *** it's so stereotypical, but that's OK. ;)
2.4k · Jun 2015
Will I Ever Be OK?
Marisa Lu Makil Jun 2015
Will I ever be OK?
This loneliness always stays
Their lips constantly say
"Darling, you will be OK"

I don't believe what they say
Because I am not OK
And it gets worse day to day
I will never be OK

Will I ever be OK?
Beasts of lonely want to stay
I wish they'd just go away
I just want to be OK

Like a never ending day
Lonely 'gain comes out to play
So to God allmight' I pray
Please don't let the lonely stay.

I just want to be OK.
My dearest heavenly Father, please take this burden from me. It is too heavy for me to bear.
2.3k · Jun 2015
Sunburn and Skinned Knees
Marisa Lu Makil Jun 2015
The light dapples in
Throwing odd shadows
On the plastic surrounding me.
Like a strange sunset put there
To taunt my eyes

Each droplet of water
Is another arrow
Shooting new spikes of pain
Through my body

Hundreds
Thousands
Millions of drops
Per second
Splash onto my skin.
1,000
2,000

I could have avoided the pain
I could have stopped this
Not going to the beach
Not going on that walk

But oh, I would not take it back.

Not one second.
Every
Happy
Minute was another
Happy
Memory

To add to my collection
And even
As I lay here
Rivulets of water
Washing down my red skin
I am making another.

You tease me
Like some cruel trickster
Happiness
Dripping down my back

Turned to cruel
Twisted
Pain
Running up my spine like a knife.

Oh, blissful pain
Would that I could feel
You to your full relevance

Instead, you trip over me
Leaving pain in your wake.

Like a torture machine.

This feels so bad
But so good.
Once the water is freed
From the contraption shooting it
Like a pistol in my heart
Onto my skin
It rebels against its maker
And trickles delightfully across me, sending delightful shivers
Into me
Only to betray me again.

Oh, sweet treasure
Would that your painful side were invisible
So
I
Could sleep
Once
Again.
I got a sunburn, and skinned knees. I am in copious amounts of pain. -_-
2.1k · May 2015
Monster
Marisa Lu Makil May 2015
Walls
Askilter

Sounds
Linger

Voices
Whisper

Lights
Flicker

Mi­ce
Skitter

Snakes
Slither

And somewhere
Nearby

A monster lurks.

Dear monster underneath my bed,
You scare me
Even though you're dead.

And though a lurking ghost you be,
My horrid monster
You scare me.
2.0k · Feb 2015
Fake
Marisa Lu Makil Feb 2015
Plastic smiles
I don a fake face
I prep myself
For the day.
The time is coming
When they'll all see
Me for who I am.

This is the day
This is the day
They lose

They can't see
Who I really am.
They don't know
It's all a sham.
The time is coming
When they'll all see
The mask that hides my face.

This is the day
This is the day
I win

Oh, look what you've done
We're all fools
Every one.
And this
This is the day
We live

I'm "too big"
I'm "too small" now
"Wear a wig"
"Take it off" now

What do they want,
What do they want
From me?

Oh, look what you've done
We're all fools
Every one.
And this
This is the day
We live
I couldn't think of any other verses, so...yeah. :P
2.0k · May 2015
MAN IN A TARDIS
Marisa Lu Makil May 2015
Not all
Fangirls
And Fanboys
Are obsessed

But I think that in all of us
There is that tiny hope that
One day
A madman in a
Blue box
Will come to take us away from this crazy
Thing
Called
Reality.
1.9k · Jul 2015
My Fair Lady [In Waiting]
Marisa Lu Makil Jul 2015
Oh, to cast my eyes
On someone as elegant
As she must be

To touch
Something as angelic
As the fingers she dangles
So nonchalantly from the opening
Of the chariot
She rides

Oh sweet beauty
Would that you were mine to hold.

What I would do
For the chance to see that face
The one so many look over
And pass by
Every day

Simple fools they must be
To pass by
The face that must out-shine
Even the stars

On one of those
Lovely fingers
Resides a ring

It symbolizes eternity.
Who was the giver of this gift?
Oh, gods above,
Do not let someone else have stolen
The heart
Of this angel.

Have mercy on me
A peasant
Pining over
This woman.

You should be
The one with a crown
My darling
The one wearing jewels
And many lovely gowns

And yet
Alas
You were born a servant
Doomed
To be overlooked

Though you are more beautiful
Than the sun.

Be still my heart,
My soul

My darling, I beg of you to have me
For I can clearly see
Though your face be veiled
That you, indeed are glorious
In your beauty.
The gist of this poem is a peasant pining away over a servant girl. He can see her hand draped out of the window of the litter as it passes by, but she is wearing a veil, so he can't see her all the way. He imagines what she must look like judging by how beautiful her fingers are.
I've never done a poem like this to my memory, so let me know what you think. :)
1.9k · Jun 2015
Empty Smiles
Marisa Lu Makil Jun 2015
Put a smile on your
Face and soon enough, you will
Believe you're okay.
I heard once that when you've lost someone you love, the best way to get through it is to wake up on Monday and tell yourself that this week, you will smile, and be okay. Then so it again the next  week, and the next. Soon enough, you might truck everyone (yourself included) that you are okay.
1.8k · Mar 2015
Broken Beautiful
Marisa Lu Makil Mar 2015
We are the broken
We show our scars.
We adhere to society because they
Won't accept that we are different.

We are the broken beautiful.
We hide our scars.
We don't let anyone inside because
If we do, we won't be beautiful.

We are the broken beautiful.
We judge not because we have been judged.
1.7k · Nov 2023
School Day
Marisa Lu Makil Nov 2023
I'm still learning
To talk about what happened
I'm still learning
That I went through a trauma
I'm still learning
That it wasn't my fault
I'm still learning
That I couldn't have done anything
I'm still learning
To admit that I'm still broken
I'm still learning
That it's okay to say it out loud
I'm still learning
That it wasn't handled right
I'm still learning
That it still affects me 13 years later
I'm still learning
That even though they told me I couldn't tell anyone, it's okay for me to tell the people I trust, or whoever the hell I want
I'm still learning
That I'm strong and brave and loved
I'm still learning
That I am not damaged goods
Just because I'm still learning
How to be a person again
I won't say that I already know these things or even that I'm fully convinced. But I will admit that I'm still learning, and that's okay.
1.6k · May 2015
It's a bit Complex
Marisa Lu Makil May 2015
It's a bit Complex

I want to tell you
That you make me angry
So angry

I want to say
That night after night
I have cried because of you

I want to make you
Know the abandonment
You forced upon me

I want to scream
At you and slay
Slay, slay my demons

I wish you knew
That I want you to text me
So I know you care

But at the same time
I love you so so much
I want you to know that.

But yeah.
It's complex.
1.6k · Aug 2015
God Made Me...
Marisa Lu Makil Aug 2015
God made me loving
So I would love everyone

God made me broken
So I could make sure I never break someone else

God made me hurt
So I could heal others

God made me anxious
So I could learn to trust

God made me motherly
For those who don't have one

God made me uncoordinated
So I would know that balance
Is not always physical

God made me compassionate
So I would know his love for us

God made me faithful
So I would know what it's like to be betrayed

God made me insecure
So I could tell others that no one is perfect

God made me human
Flawed
Broken
Anxious
And uncoordinated that I am

So He could prove to me
That He is stronger than my ups
And
Downs.
1.6k · Aug 2015
Sleep *Optional*
Marisa Lu Makil Aug 2015
When I can't sleep
And the darkness won't close in
Hovering ever close
But never touching me

I close my eyes
And think of my fondest memories of you.
Only then am I able
To **** the black into the recesses
Of my mind
And finally
Rest
Peacefully
Dear good friend
May my love for you never end
Dearest love
Don't take away my memories.
1.5k · Jul 2015
Top Insult
Marisa Lu Makil Jul 2015
You don't understand
The way I think

When I'm with you
I seem to shrink

I don't think you get
The way I feel

Your hate eats me up
Like some kind of meal

And when we hang out
I'm so afraid

That your new victim
Will be my name

"You're stupid," you said
Straight to my heart

So when I see you
I fall apart

So just be gentle
With my broke heart

Not that it matters
You make it fall apart.
To someone I know: this is me being honest. Yes, I'm angry at you. Yes, you make me wonder why I stay around you. Then I remember - it's because everyone around you thinks I'm a good influence on you. But I'm starting to think that you're doing me more harm than good. So if you want me to stay, you better stop treating me so bad.
-love, the person you bully
1.5k · Mar 2017
Beautiful Things
Marisa Lu Makil Mar 2017
These are some beautiful things:
A baby's first smile,
A bird in the wild,
A bride on the aisle,
A love that's worthwhile,

Warm wind in the trees,
The salt in the seas,
The buzz of spring bees,
Winter's first freeze,

A loved one's laugh,
A child's handmade craft,
An actor's autograph,
A newborn calf,

The sunrise in the sky,
And the sunset alike,
And kind passersby,
The stars in the night,

The wind in one's hair,
Sweet spring on the air,
A mother's care,
A child's prayer

The color of skin,
True feelings within,
The sound of violins,
And feeling sheepskin,

A book in my hands,
My feet in the sand,
Stories of another land,
And the promised land,

The leaves in the fall,
Mountains like walls,
Sounds of a waterfall,
The smell of rainfall,

Peace after war,
And petrichor,
And sand on the shore,
And a winning score,

Peace at night,
And perfect light,
And a first sight,
And a flying kite,

A smile so dear,
A kiss so clear,
A loved one near,
And a new come year,

And hope that everything will be okay

These are the beautiful things
I could go on and on and on about beautiful things, even ones that don't rhyme. I fall in love with the little things, like how my friend only eats apples with a knife, or how my mom never actually drinks her coffee, she forgets about it and leaves it in the microwave ten times a day. I love that my cat can tell when I can't sleep and comes and lays right up against my back and purrs to help me sleep. I love that whenever my best friend is thinking, she subconsciously touches the back of her thumb to the indent above her upper lip. I fall in love with little details. There are just as many beautiful things in this world as there are ugly ones. Don't forget to savor them. ❤
1.5k · Sep 2017
The Way We Were
Marisa Lu Makil Sep 2017
I miss the way things used to be
I miss the way we were
I miss the love I felt all day
And how I felt so sure

I miss the way we'd fellowship
Sing and talk late at night
I miss the way we were together
Fighting the good fight

I miss the laughter that we shared
And all the bitter tears
And how it felt that all that stuff
Would last for years and years

I miss all of the time we spent
Learning more and more
Of nooks and crannies we had found
In our hearts and souls

I hope we come again one day
To where we used to be
Where we can talk and sing again
Of where we long to see.
1.5k · Feb 2019
U•ni•verse
Marisa Lu Makil Feb 2019
//yoo-ni-verss//
Noun:

I. You are a wonder wrapped in a miracle. Every ebony gasp breeds holiness. Every tincture of time that you hold bursts into purple midnights. Every bright escape another release of your cosmic breath.

II. You rule with satin clouds and shining rain. Your every movement shakes time.

III. You know your greatest magic and will forever prove it to those who rest beneath your raven sky. You are power and grace entwined, you hold on your hands an eternity, and you fully know it's wretched destiny.
I'm trying one of these definition poem thingies. How'd I do?
1.4k · Feb 2015
Canvas
Marisa Lu Makil Feb 2015
My life is a canvas all bumpy and plain.
Each time I do something, a strike will be made.
If, for instance, I do something cruel, or bad,
Come darkened, black colors to make me all sad.
But then, if I do something happy or nice,
Then comes the rainbow all lovely and bright.

My life is a canvas all bumpy and brown
Each time I step forward, I take a step down.
It's a wondr'ous burden, these colors of mine.
They oft' make me think of hurt and demise.
I try to withstand it the one way I can:
By topping more on-make others feel bad.

My life is a canvas and as you might see,
Doing more evil puts evil in me.
It roars and it bites more often than not
And my only comfort is a small bright spot.
I call him my comfort, my savior, my Lord.
He saved my dark canvas-he saved the whole world!

My life is a canvas and as you may see:
The evil tries to burn me up and take away the key.
The key-my Lord, my savior is always there for me.
Wheth'r dragons bring me down, or others drown me in the sea.
What will you do with your canvas and all your darkest blots?
I beg you to make room for the little bright spot.
1.4k · Dec 2023
Blood, Sweat, and Tears
Marisa Lu Makil Dec 2023
Kiss my mind and not my skin
Strip me slowly of the walls I've built
Take my hands
And push me up against the walls
Of my soul
And learn every inch
Of who I really am
Until you know me as intimately
As does the darkness
That surrounds me
And the resonance of your being
Drips from my mouth
Like pleas for mercy
Thought I'd try a different kind of poem. Inspired by a random picture I saw on pinterest.
1.4k · Nov 2018
Apologize
Marisa Lu Makil Nov 2018
Sometimes apologies aren't about
Who's really at fault
Sometimes it's just about fixing relationships
Sometimes you just need to apologize even if it's not your fault, because the relationship is often more important than the argument.
1.3k · Feb 2015
Shiloh's Ward
Marisa Lu Makil Feb 2015
My hear is torn with sorrow great
Wanting it to bring me down.
Mourning all around me waits
I cannot make a sound.

Oh who will come for this poor wretch
And take me far away?
Oh who will o're the chasm stretch
To lead me on my way?

My heart despairs that none will come
To bring me to my home
But I remember: there's a God
His name: Jehovah Shalome.

I shall not be forgotten here
So deep beneath the ground
Where shadows lie and danger waits
I shall not make a sound.

I know one day, He'll come for me
And take me far away
Into Heaven's Bright Embrace
Forever there to stay.
Shiloh's poem to ward off the Demons in Hades (A poem for a story I wrote)
1.3k · Feb 2021
When You Wish
Marisa Lu Makil Feb 2021
I fell in love with the dark of the mountains
And the lights in the October sky.
1.3k · Feb 2015
EverBlue
Marisa Lu Makil Feb 2015
Blue, blue
Everblue
Tearing earth asunder
As  a dear friend who I am
Some might call me water.

Blue, blue
Everblue
Look, oh look at me!
Home to plants and fish alike
Some would call me sea

Blue, blue
Everblue
Earth has me in bonds
Bugs across my surface skim
I am called a pond.

Blue, blue
Everblue
'Cross country like a sliver
Tossing, swerving, bubbling, laughing
I was named a river.

Blue, blue
Everblue
Cover me in love.
Boats and fins across me swim.
I am called a cove.
I wrote this a long time ago, and just now found it again. Haha
1.3k · Nov 2015
Untitled 20
Marisa Lu Makil Nov 2015
A song echoes here in my ears
It sings in a place no one hears
It twitters along
And sings bold and strong
It's lullaby calms all my fears.
Why I sing when I work.  :)
1.2k · Feb 2015
Demons
Marisa Lu Makil Feb 2015
There's a place inside her that is darkened
She fears the lives of those around her fade.
All inside her mind, there's a black spot and
Now she wishes in the light she'd stayed.

She doesn't think that she can bear the burden
It presses down upon her like a weight
The voices cry around her to let go, but
She is too afraid of what's at stake.

She cries out in wont of such a helper
As one who seemed to be there long ago.
He'd comfort her; always gave her shelter
But now it seems that he has let her go.

Her struggle only seems to bring her lower.
The thought comes to her mind to just give up.
Just when she thinks nothing else can save her,
Her godly savior comes to pick her up.

Now whenever her steps seem to falter,
She will send her prayers to Him above
Who she screamed back to when he came to call her
And now He sends His own to her in love.
1.2k · Oct 2023
Wholly
Marisa Lu Makil Oct 2023
You may be beaten
But you can still heal
Your hands may hurt
But you can still provide relief
Your skin may be bruised
But you can still soothe others
You aren't weak just because you're broken
You can still make others whole.
You aren't limited by your own shattered flesh.
I'm still learning that even though I'm not doing well, I can still support the ones I love. You can still be a physician even with a broken leg.
1.2k · Jul 2017
Prayer For Deliverence
Marisa Lu Makil Jul 2017
Let me hear your lovingkindness in the morning
Let me taste your goodwill in the evening

For I trust in you
I trust you with all that I am
I trust you when I awake
And when I lie down

Teach me the way in which I should walk
I cannot walk alone
Without your help
Without your hands

For to you I lift my soul
I give my heart
I give my soul
I give me life
To you
To the one who has saved me
Time and again

Let me hear your lovingkindness in the morning
For I trust in you
Teach me the way in which I should walk
For to you I lift up my soul
Based on Psalm 143:8
Marisa Lu Makil Jun 2015
How beautiful is the sunset
Like the blood that drips down my wrists
Every
Night

Like the great painter has
Decided to paint the sky
The same color as life

How ironic that so many die at night.
How ironic that I never knew blood was so beautiful
Until it dripped from my veins.
I thought of this just now. Thinking of writing a book about this? "The Ramblings of a Depressed Psychopath" kinda had a ring to it, no? ;)
1.1k · Dec 2015
Never
Marisa Lu Makil Dec 2015
No one should have to stay up
Stifling sobs
Because they don't feel worthy
Of someone's care

No one should ever feel guilty for
Loving someone
Or even showing interest in them

No one should ever have to feel
***** for brushing hands with
Their soul mate

No one should ever feel
Too ugly for society

No one should ever feel
Too vulnerable to express
Feelings they've had for
What seems like forever.

No family should ever
Make their child feel bad
For the style of music they like
Or books they read
Or clothes they wear
Or makeup they have

No girl should ever feel
Like no one could ever love her
Because of the way someone has told her
And convinced her
She is

No boy should ever be
Teased
And mocked
For feeling emotions stronger
Or deeper
Than others are capable of

The way he is treated
The way she is made out to be
The way they are made
To hate the sight of themselves
Should never have entered into human
Thought.
We are all beautiful
We are all lovely.
1.1k · Feb 2015
Reasons I hurt:
Marisa Lu Makil Feb 2015
I hurt because of loneliness
There's no one really
For me to talk to.
There's not a soul that understands
No one who will be with me through
And through.

I hurt because abandonment
Comes down upon me like a plague
Friends I thought were here forever
Seem to be wishing that they'd stayed.

I hurt because of love's tight grip
On my heart for those who have gone away
Forever
But not because of their own choices
But because of the mistakes we've made.

I hurt because cold nostalgia
Chills me to the bone
Whenever I attempt new friends
I'm always thinking of the old.

I hurt because my thoughts of life
Are hovering over me like
A dark cloud.
What kind of mother will I be one day?
Will I love my husband?
What will my job be?
Will my dreams ever be fulfilled?

I hurt because the world around me is telling me what I should do
What kind of clothes to wear today...
How should I interact?
With whom?

I hurt because my compassion
Is lingering always ever near.
I fear for lives beside of mine
Of losing friendships...

Now I have told you why I hurt.
All of my fears and pains I've shown.
Don't ever live like I have lived.
It's the worst kind of pain I've known.
1.1k · Jul 2015
Believer
Marisa Lu Makil Jul 2015
I am a strong
Believer
In
Memories
Magic
Mystery
Mercy
Monsters
Marvels
­Miracles
Madmen
Malice
Marriage
Majesty
Masterpieces
Matchmaking
­And
Mayhem.
^-^
1.1k · Apr 2015
It must hurt.
Marisa Lu Makil Apr 2015
Does it hurt
Being so cruel?

You must have had help.

No one is like that on their own.

I can practically see your
Emotional scars

Bleeding
Dripping
Dying.

It must hurt
Being this cruel.

I just want to help you.
I just want to heal.
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