I want to be called strong
Not beautiful, not smart
Strong
Not physically, but mentally
I could get along as long as I'm strong

I want to be strong
Maybe as I had been before my illness
Maybe as I am after

I know I am strong
I have been, and always will be
I am strong even as I am weak
I am strong even in my last week

Morning sunlight lighting the dark hardwood floors
Pages being turned and voices no louder than a whisper
People shuffling in and out the doors
The rain coming in at last
Shifting the clouds
Now to overcast
Watching silently just barely a glance
Observing life as it is
Hoping for the chance
To feel something more
Become something better
Moods always changing
According to the weather
I sip the burn of this morning roast
Nibble my eggs
Crunch on my toast
People in the park sway on the swings
Probably thinking
Of such trivial things
Man on the corner of the street
Checking the time
He's got somewhere to be
Getting back to the daily grind
A tearful woman sitting on the bench
Crying her heart out
From the guy who called her a *****
Life appears all around us
We choose what to ignore
The sick, the healthy
The rich, the poor.

A single glance
That's all it took
Fallen deeply
With just one look

Your blue eyes
More a turquoise sea
Or how I wish
You were with me

Your dark curly hair
And full lips
What I'd give
For just one kiss

And if we should ever meet again
I wouldn't hesitate
To walk up to you
And ask you on a date.

Breathing out
In order to breathe in
I know nothing's wrong
But I'm not convinced
I can't let it out
And just let it happen again

Is my heart a petty thing
You are a petty crook
You steal glances at me
My heart is one of many you took

Goodnight used to have luster
When it was shared between our lips
Now you fall to her
Her seductive smile; the curve of her hips

Is my trust a petty thing
Or have I mistook
The truth we shared the lies she told
You reeled me in on a hook

Love her but remember me
One day you'll be wishing
To know where I'll be
I'm long gone on daybreak dawn
Nowhere to be seen

Oh Moon, oh goddess;
why do you weep?
I know too well of your lonliness.
I know too well about the darkness that surrounds you.

Little light lingers from the end of a day.
The same light that approaches you.
It shuns you, pushes you away.

You believe nobody sees you, but
I know many who admire your
shimmery shine.
Plenty look to your silent beauty.

Oh how the stars are yours and nobody else's.
For they are just as dazzling;
yet you outshine them all.
The glimmer even at a glance of a sliver of you
is enough to allow a decadent sigh.

It is me
At fault
For having high hopes
For having great expectations
It is me
Whom I'm mad at
Because I allowed myself
Because I believed
It is me
Always me
Always my fault
Always wrong
Am I right?

It makes me sad to lose you
You were something I never had
Never will have and thanks to her
She's not to blame
That I am sure
Only myself
Because she is better

It a little too late now
She's already gone
No one was there
When things went wrong

She did it to herself
It was only a matter of time
She didn't know that
She was one of a kind

She didn't know that she was loved
She felt alone
Unwanted
Not at home

She didn't speak out
Just out of fear
She wouldn't reach out
She thought no one would hear

She was told I love you
A little too late
She was told you're worth it
A little too late

She didn't know it wasn't too late
So she did it anyway
She didn't know if anyone would care

She wanted to end the pain
She didn't know about how much she would cause
To everyone around her
To everyone she loved

It's a little too late now
And the damage is done
It's getting late now
You sit at her grave to watch the setting sun

Always thinking of her terrible fate
Always thinking about how you were
A little too late.

I was alone
Young in age
Filled with sadness
Filled with rage

Tried to speak out
But no one heard
Not a whisper
Not one single word

Got used to depression
A familiar friend
There always
Until the end

I didn't need anything, anyone
I did everything on my own
I got used to the cold
I got used to being alone

The girl with no future
The girl with no path
The girl angry with the world
Full of wrath

They starred and they whispered
But I didn't care
I'd cut my skin
I'd cut my hair

The girl who had nothing at all
The girl who suffered the fall

You're across the room
You're sweet perfume

My nervous mind
In a crowded room, you're hard to find

The music's loud
There's a dressed up crowd

Awkward dancing
And nervous laughing

It's so simple
It's so easy

Just one question
Will you dance with me?

Change strikes the heart
Piecing you together
Tearing you apart

Leaving you a mess
Leaving you at your best

Showing who you really are
Challenging you to rise
Being you
Despite the judgmental eyes

Change is good
Atleast thats what they say
I suppose it is or may be
One day

It's new
But
It seems right

The way we hold hands
How you hold me tight

We just met
But you know me so well
Whenever I'm upset
You can tell

You'll buy me roses
My favorite kind
I didn't even tell you
You'll say that you read my mind

It's new
But now we've grown old
Everyday is new with you
Or so you've been told

I hold your hand
As if we just met
The love still there
But better yet.

It's not fair
To tell me I burden you
I didn't ask for this
I'm trying my hardest really
Do you think I want this?
Did this on purpose?
I want to be the girl who talks to people without hesitation
To speak my mind
To get up and dance
To not cry when I'm alone
Not be unable to breathe when I feel the slightest bit of social awkwardness
Not be offended by everyones' joke and jab at me
Which usually leads to more crying and hating myself
I don't want to look in the mirror and hate what I see
I don't want you to think I'm off putting because I'm quiet most of the time
I don't hate or dislike you
I hate and dislike me which is why I could never talk to a person like you
I don't want to love feeling second best at everything
I don't want to be treated differently because of my physicality and mentality
I don't want you to leave
I don't want you to feel like you have to fix me
I can't be fixed
Pain is relentless and forever
I stare for long periods of time contemplating my death
But I realize I can hurt the people that hurt me
I am weak
I am sad
I wish I could stop feeling this bad

If I close my eyes you're here

But I'm not real

But you're here and you're alive
You're breathing

But I'm not real, I'm not alive

But touching you feels real
Your hands, so soft
I remember them being soft

Don't you understand
This isn't really me
I'm gone

I don't understand anything
You're here and why can't that be okay

Because I'm not really here
it's not okay for you to go on this way
You must let go

I tried and isn't that worth something
Can't I be allowed this moment of bliss with you

I'm not real
This isn't real
Let go Milo, let go
I'm dead and you must let go

I'll never let go
You're gone but my love will never leave
Forever is a simple thing

Laugh right now
Smile right now
For no reason
But simply that you're here
You're alive
You're one person
With the potential to change the world
Right now, things are changing
But you are still you.

I'll be the girl you'll forget
The quiet one with things on her mind
The one who prefers whiskey to wine
I'll be the girl you leave behind
I'll be anything and nothing to you
Pass by move on with your life
I'll be yours even if only for a moment
Whenever you feel it is right

Body, mind, and soul
All grow tired
All grow old

Heart strong as a lion
Once so true and brave
Lie six feet under in a watery grave

Inevitable
Life and death
Work then die
Look forward to a future that leads to our inevitable death
Wonder why we try

Everything** will be okay;
as long as you stay by me.

When your world is a blur
and you feel unsure;
you can count on me.

I know you just need a friend.
I'll be there til' the end.
You can wait and see.

The world can still be beautiful,
but you've always been beautiful to me.

It haunts me.
It haunts me.
The way you breathe my name.
Your touch still lingers on my, and oh my I can't believe you stayed sane.
I grow old with the cold, but at least that I know I can find you now.
I breathe you out.
I breathe you out.
I see you now.
I breathe you out.
I breathe you out.
I can win.

Listen to music
Calm down
These things won't matter

And if I am to love you
With great might and understanding
Understand that I am a person too

Strong as I can be
I too have feelings
So please don't hurt me

You know that feeling when time freezes
You're hand starts to shake a little
You can't help smiling when you know for a fact how stupid you look
They're the only thought on your mind first thing in the morning and last at night

Sweet dreams of lost ones
Those who we can no longer find
                                 A place to be safe
                                 Hoping you will be fine
                                             Trying hard to breathe
                                              Not knowing what will last
                                                     But the future will be brighter
                                                        ­                The past is just the past

I love
Loving you
I hate
Hating you
I want to be
Wanting you
But things have change
Life got hard
But you'll always be in my heart.