You can't pull me under when I'm already down
And that gives me a strange feeling of satisfaction
Being at your lowest means only going up or staying where you are
Sadly it's more comfortable to stay sad
Madly easy to stay mad
Bad habit of being bad
Here thinking I was safe
But my mind was never a good place
Can't shut it off but at least I can shut out the world
That's good enough for now
For now all I know
My days are numbered
But if they were cut short
I'd be okay
Know that I'll be okay
It's better for me and you in a way
I didn't ask for any of this
Truth be told I never needed it
Still it found its way to me
It's just my personal tragedy

The most unkindful cuts
Comes from those the closest to our hearts
They know exactly where to hurt you
And usually don't regret in doing so

I love you
I love you not
Don't love you at all
Love you a lot
Think of you
You're my every thought
What's your name
I forgot

You love me
The me you think of
The one you think I could be
You love me
Who doesn’t exist
Who doesn’t become a reality
You can’t love me
I’m real

Lovely, little moments
Feeling that you love me
Knowing that I love you

I found I never was at home
Unless you were there
Putting your arms around me
Lying next to you

This isn’t our beginning
Most certainly not our end
Remember how you confessed you liked me
Remember when I felt the same way about you

Lovely, little moments
Every moment with you

You fake okay to ease the ones you love
If you don't you are the burden
You fake good health to forget you're in pain
If you don't you remember the medicine destroying your body

Remembering the happiness you had and the lack thereof
The gift of life was never a guerdon
To feel nothing and to feel it all the same
Nobody nobody nobody
You

I wish I was important
I wish I felt it deep in my bones
Drop everything important
Here for you, - -actually here for you, important

It’s always at times when I need someone the most that nobody is ever around
“I’m here for you”
But are you?
Words are words
But the words screaming in my head are louder.
They screech their twisted words and dig their claws into my brain.
But you’re here for me right?

I don’t see you though. I don’t feel you. I don’t feel loved. I don’t feel anything. I’m empty except for the screaming.