I am not coal to be pressured
And form into a diamond
I am human,
Under enough crushing pressure
For ever so long
Never to let up
I will break
For I am flesh and bone
Not of rot and stone

If I am to break
My dear little bones
The pieces must be put back together
Held in tender care behind walls
Before they can heal again
To become stronger than before

So, mind the walls
For I am healing
They will come down when I am ready
When my bones have mended
Strengthened anew.

- Jay M
April 20th, 2021

Once, long ago
A brilliant flash before
Saved forever in time
Faded in shades of greys
Like a photograph;
Black and white
One thing or another
Not shining in its entirety quite yet

Then, saturation of color and hue
Bring forth visions unseen
Slightly blurred at first,
Then in full detail
Sprawled out into glorious view

Though once, only raw and bare
Time brings it into exposure
Into the open air
Believe it or not
Some brought into the light of reality
As they are surely meant to be

- Jay M
April 19th, 2021

In the daily quarrel
When words fall upon ****** and deaf ears
Repetition is agitating
Boiling beneath the flesh
Festering like a toxin of lingering potency
Snaking its way into the corners of the mind
Push it down, cast it away
Do not allow the flames to become you

Gripping tightly
Perhaps too much so
As it snaps beneath the pressure
Only a fraction made visible
The rest to be silenced
Only audible for one mind
Screaming and thrashing
Just beneath the surface

Stain the paper
Clutch the fragments
Dispose of the now useless thing
Punishment surely to ensue
For breaking things isn’t the answer they like

Purse your lips
Bite your tongue
Until it bleeds

Clench your fists
Knuckles white
Ding your nails into your palms

Walk away
Hold the chaos at bay
Pull the chain
For fighting would only be in vain
Causing nothing put pain
None, of which, for the enemy

Seething in a soundless cage
Is the inextinguishable rage
Fed in every passing day
Relentless, and you know what they say;
There is no rest for the wicked

Push me far enough
And I will not hold back
Break me enough
And I will become the monster you made me
Uncaged, unleashed
My tongue dripping acidic poison
My eyes visions of flames
My arms stained with well-worn lies
My hands red with “discipline”
My feet tired from running
My hair wild and untamed as a storm cloud
My clothes holding me tighter than a withheld breath
My will stronger than the iron fist wielded upon me

Let me go
Let me walk away
Before I let it all go
The raging fire I hold at bay.

- Jay M
April 6th, 2021

You simply cannot understand
The extent of all of the things I wish to do
All of which with you
The list goes on and on
So darling take my hand
And together I will show you
The wonders within my wildest of dreams

- Jay M
April 5th, 2021

I call into the moonlit gleam
Though it may not right away seem
It was but a weary dream
Conjured by the heart
Only told in part
The remainder for another night

What more shall this tale tell?
What more shall be revealed
In the levels of the subconscious?
Only time and the will of a mind shall tell

- Jay M
March 26th, 2021

Sirens sing, call, and plea
But I only wanna hear your melody
When I am lost at sea
I call into the tides and sing
Hoping for the harmony to ring
For the waves to finally bring
Take me right back to you
From across the great blue

- Jay M
March 25th, 2021

Shining ever bright
Brighter than the stars
Glimmering in the sky, tonight

Twirling through every turn
Ever flowing strings
Surely with lessons to learn

Bumps may come along the road
Less so traveled and trodden
A message without a code
Lacking the need
If one should only read

Never knowing what one may find
When wandering along
Perhaps it was what was needed all along
Found in places most unexpected
All it took was to be redirected

Taken to an astounding view
Ever so near and new
A sky clear and endless blue
Fading to the dark
Let through the ethereal light
Of a wonderful night

- Jay M
March 24th, 2021

One day
I know not when
I yearn for the dawn to arrive
For the sun to bring forth the day
When I may finally bid this prison farewell
Step through the faded door and then
Finally live, rather than just survive
For the day when I can, at last, say
I have escaped this hell

Someday
Regrettably far, far away
There will no longer be the fear
Consuming of a poor dear
Rather release, relief
Free, despite all belief

There will come a day
When all will be at ease
Like a cool, summer breeze
After a day of blistering heat
No more burns upon these aching feet

- Jay M
March 24th, 2021

Air of crisp breeze
Lingering scent of pine trees
Fine needles of evergreen
Stars above, twinkle and glow
A scene so calm and serene

All about
As though they had fallen to Earth
Little ***** of humming illumination
Yellow, like delicate embers seemingly flow
Without care or doubt
Like fragments of fire from a hearth
Drawing ever nearer
A vision almost never clearer
As the nights rise and fall

- Jay M
March 6th, 2021

Calm and content
Not a thing to lament
Air crisp, delicate breeze a whisper
Sky faded with evening glow
No need to whine or whimper
Let it all go

Far above, distant celestial lights
Dancing, scattered across the vastness
A scene so beautiful, so serene
Soaring in lesser heights
Orbs illuminate yellow
Floating throughout the darkness
In the distance, trees of evergreen
Little insects waving hello
In the fading, evening glow

- Jay M
March 8th, 2021

Blue illuminate
Black conceal
Minutes tick by
Where is fate?

All seems so unreal
In the seconds that fly
Strange, dim light
Unsure of the battles to fight
The foes to be hidden and sly
Or confident and outright

Slip away into sleep
Or rise to face the early dawn?
Fall back into the sweet,
Ever forgiving escape
Or stand and take on what lies ahead
The outstretched hand that can make
Any number of possibilities
From merely that to, instead, realities

To glimpse upon that which may lie ahead,
Or to fall into the tangles of the mind?
To venture forth into that which may become known,
Or to remain entranced in the confines of familiarity?
The answer, the choice to be made
Lies in every dawn.

- Jay M
February 23rd, 2021

Hollow and stone
Follow the bone
Up the spine
Through thine
Decaying marrow

Nerves barely tingle
Rippling, thoughts mingle
Wisping through delicate strings
Concealed bell ring, rings
Echoing through the piercing silence
Seeking out no such guidance

Whispers tell fragments of an intriguing tale
Rise of the spirits, only to shatter
Pierce the fragile veil
Words to crumble and clatter
Into a fumbling mess
Consisting of disaster and stress
To a well-worn gate
At last torn by great emotions, perhaps hate

Fires of many to burn
Lessons still to learn
From the ashes to be born anew
Some to bid adieu
As form is to reshape
Forged from fires of passion
Still with every scar and scrape
No longer of ashen soul
Finally, becoming whole

- Jay M
February 22nd, 2021

One touch
Calls forth reality
Just a glimpse
Caught off guard
Never much
Walls with a moment of clarity
Of clearest quartz

Windows to the smokey undertones
Dried bushes of roses
Wilted, with petals to the wind
Stained stones
Line the path down
Into the endless pits of brown
Like bark of a tree
Or perhaps nutrient-rich soils
Of a secret garden
Watered with internalized rains
Never to flood out with great pains

In the garden
Shielded away
Is a pond of fish playing coy
Above tangling reeds
Only they stay
Protected from hands that may destroy
Or perhaps to brush against the hand that feeds
Light filtering through the green curtain

Buried beneath roots of reeds
Lies a chest of steel
Painted with winged steeds
Ghostly figures, perhaps once real
Locked with a strange mechanism
To which there is only one key
Of the strangest sorts
Perhaps lost to time
Or kept close as can be
Just out of sight

- Jay M
February 5th, 2021

Unfeeling
Undisturbed
In simply the worst of times
Potentially leaving others reeling
Or in my stead disturbed
Whilst leading on conversation
How is it all so?

Am I to be assuming
That it is encouraged
To put on a painted mask
Of emotions, when the fact of the matter
Is that there is nothing existing behind it?
Nothing more than a blank, slippery canvas
That simply cannot be painted upon

- Jay M
February 2nd, 2021

No lock on the chains today
There is nothing left for you to say
Besides you can't put me on display
No way that I'll stay
Sound okay?

Pick the color, the style
Tell me to sit, stay a while
Wanting to go the extra mile
Not this time

Couldn't get me last time
Won't get me again
No matter the song or rhyme
The roses and then
The same old ****t
Year after year
Don't call me "dear"

Gifts and a meal
Won't make this dream of yours real
I won't play pretend
Can't this game just end?

Let me do what I please
Let me have a day of ease
Maybe sitting under the shade of trees
Enjoying the delicate breeze
Just let me seize
The day for myself
Instead of sitting quietly on a shelf

- Jay M
January 29th, 2021

A pleasant morning,
Not a sign of warning,
For this day
All good shall stay.

- Jay M
January 22nd, 2021

Sky of grey
Clouds of palest hue
There are many things I wish to say
Great and small, all for you

Imaginably soft
Compared to cotton fluff
Gazed upon from a dusty loft
Full of old trinkets and stuff

Gifts hidden away
Cards and letters bound to stay
Beneath layers of time
Next to paintings of yellow and lime

Cobwebs left by content spiders
To be gazed upon by curious writers
Moved on for better prey
Webs left to be cleaned on an unseen day

- Jay M
January 13th, 2021

Tiresome day
Seemingly little to say
Hoping for things to be
Well on their way

Tired, near gone day
Nothing much to say
Not much to see
Sleepy limbs to sway

Shuffle through
See what may be

News,
Oh happy day!
At last,
Great things to shout and say!
Life surging back into the limbs
Run, jump about
Celebrate this greatness that has come!

Rising to swift moving feet
Spirits, today they soar
A great new thing there is to greet
The night no longer a bore!

Here comes this poet,
My weapon is my word,
I will slay them with my tongue
Then turn them quite around
Take them by their hands
And dance with them
To the wildest of songs!

Here comes this poet,
Words at the ready
Come and catch me now
No need to wonder how
Stride quite steady
And they shall soon know it
As here comes the poet!

- Jay M
January 12th, 2021

Racing across
The well worn path
Of old earth and stone
Down the road
Over the hilltop
Not a moment
To brace for impact
Only the collision
Cast back
To the earth that flowed beneath
Now coated with a thin layer
Mind as scattered and disturbed
As the earth and grass below

Gaze across
To what lies just paces ahead
To yet another
Disoriented fellow
Pages strewn about
As is an apologetic voice
Hands fluttering about
Like freed doves

Risen and collected,
Words shared and spoken
Together they then go
Towards the setting sun
With mighty sword
Ink and pen
Away to battle they shall go

With sword strong and gleaming bright
Surely to survive the fight
Sharper than thorns
To pierce the veil
Their enemies to wail
The soldier shall prevail

With ink as black as darkest night
Words well weaved, bold with might
Surging with power of great war horns
To give strength without fail
Their foes sure to flail
The poet shall prevail

On goes the soldier
Powerful in skill
Master of the sword
And precision in the ****

On goes the poet
Sharpest in will
Master of the word
And always ink to spill

Away they go,
Walking to and fro
They shall lead their lives on well
Never to hide inside a shell
The soldier and the poet

- Jay M
January 12th, 2021

Once upon a paper thin rim
Tipping this way and that
Only to sway too far
Slipping over the delicate border
Between what is known
And the possibilities that lie beyond

Wind whistling past
Hair flowing wildly like ribbons
Lost in a summer breeze
Limbs extended upward
Reaching hopelessly for anything
Anything at all to grasp
End the great descent
Into the abyss

- Jay M
January 12th, 2021

Shock to overjoyed
From overjoyed to confusion
Comms enabled
Yet scarcely a word to be said
Across the waves of rolling static

Come in, Alpha
Do you read me,
Alpha?

A word perhaps
A few in a day
No sign of interference
So what is the cause
Of this near stale air?

This is Juliet,
Do you read me,
Alpha?
Can you hear me,
Alpha?

Nothing more than dull static
A well worn lullaby
Playing over and over
Wishing it would stop
Be replaced by content voices
But not all is as dreams tell
Something is amiss

Will you hear me,
Alpha?

- Jay M
January 11th, 2021

Wound with joy and cheer
Unaware of the danger near
Moments away
Racing mind, rather absent
Hurry, hurry, hurry-!
Outcry echoes throughout the space
What searing pain
Heat from surface to flesh
Red as ripest tomato
Forming spots of pale white
Oh dear, what plight

- Jay M
January 8th, 2021

Stolen sanity
Nightmares ooze reality
Invisible vampires
Drain all energy that remained
Now left running on fumes

A zombie left to wander
What ruins had been left behind
A husk, void of all humanity
Cold even beside raging fires
Spark and burned
Lesson learned

What was there to gain
From throwing out one allowed so close?
Dancing in empty rooms
To a broken melody
Movements sharp
Like the knife between the shoulder blades

One day
Truth shall come riding in
Like the break of dawn
Driving back the cruel lies
Aiding soulful cries

- Jay M
January 6th, 2021

My words unspoken
Never leaving my quivering lips
Ricochet like bullets
Fading in and out
Only some manage to be free
Slipping into proper sound
Forming strange words
Most would rather not hear

The reason for never allowing the flood gates to open
Is for fear that they would never close
That they would be forced in such a way
That they would eventually betray all I hold dear
To fall upon the chancing ear
Or none but my own

- Jay M
January 6th, 2021

Days
They come and go
Shuffle to and fro
A part of each
Never quite letting go

Many to come
Each one so unpredictable
Dragging on like textbooks in a bag
Get through, page by page
And drop it in the sands
Of ever shifting times

Shaking hands cannot catch a chilled breath
Freezing in this frigid space
That has become undisturbed
Only shadows dance
Memories of a relaxed stance
Only to remain as such
And nothing more

Once sweet, bringing comfort and ease
Now bittersweet, an ache yearning to cease
Turn back to the sweet, blissful things they are meant to be
Oh dear mind, let it be

A single ray of light
Shines in the distance
Miles away
Alas, the shackles that bind
Have only one key
Far away with the light

Patience is a challenge
Taken on, bring it on
A well worn promise
A tender memory
A heart waiting to be whole
Patience is many things
Tested over and over through time
To only possibly be shown what lies beyond
Waiting at the other end

- Jay M
January 4th, 2021

Beauty comes from pain
Strength comes from struggle
Bravery comes from fear
But love cannot come from hate

When will the pain turn to beauty?
When will the struggle turn to strength?
When will the fear turn to bravery?

Perhaps it's never to be known
Exploited by greedy hands
Kept away and controlled
Fear, struggle, and pain
Only put in bold
There spawns hate

- Jay M
December 14th, 2020

Too far gone is the door
Away, far from reach
Lurking in the shadows
Killing, draining all light

Tossing in an endless
Obscurity that which has no name

My, how does time
Ever does drag across the space?

- Jay M
December 14th, 2020

Visions of days yet to come
Perhaps never at all
Possibilities vary
By the thousands they flow
Ever so hard to let go

Return to a memory
Untold words fall
Right into place
Then they all fall
Into the void
Of the waking world
Back into the mind
Where such things belong

Tales never to be told
In the least never in bold
Perhaps tucked away
Never quite to stay
To be whisked away at a moments notice
Gone away from view
Hopefully not even seen by few
Remembered by none
As all comes undone

- Jay M
December 8th, 2020

Conflicted
Internally tormented
Butterflies come alive
Just beneath the flesh
Some with
Wings of razors
Others soft as silk

Call the exterminator
The pests won't leave me be
They flutter about
Collide and ****
Dead ones floating in the blood

- Jay M
December 8th, 2020

Sounds, how strange
Great and small
Struggling to pinpoint them all
As they surround
Each making itself known

Clacking of fingers across a keyboard
Near silent whir of the air conditioner
Hum of the refrigerator
Chatter and occasional cry of a housemate
Thundering of small paws above
Clicking and clacking of dog nails against hard wood floors
Voices from a computer screen
The occasional car whizzing past the street
The brief notes of a viola a room over
The flapping of the dog door
Creak of a door
Adjusting in the chair
Sighs of the dogs and people alike

Tired eyes blink slowly
Hands ever so stiff
Back aching, begging for movement
Feet and legs long since numb

Nothing is silent
Not in this time
Nor in this place

- Jay M
December 7th, 2020

Cold, chilling touch
Withering, crunching leaves
Rustling as they blow
Right along the path
To a gaping archway
Of well-worn stone

Walls so smooth
Plain and grey
Whispering ever faintly
"Stay..."

Turn after turn
Corner after corner
Passage after passage
And still no telling
If there has been any progress
To the other side of the expanse
That is the troublesome maze

Take a moment,
Take a breath,
Let it all rest
Settle down
To the ground
Merely be...

Trapped in a labyrinth
Of grey, now cracking walls
Uneven, patchy ground
Leading to what
Possibly none may know

Rise again
Recall back to when
There was color

Pace after pace
Step after step
The walls
They begin to crumble
Gradually fall
The ground below
Sprouting with grass
A path left long ago

Lost in a field,
Not a trace of the passages
Just tall, towering grass
As each moment does pass
Nothing but a vision of stalks of green

Take a breath,
Take a moment,
Listen close, and listen well
Off in the distance
Water runs and it swell

Take to the feet
That aid oh so
Greatly on this journey
Into the unknown

- Jay M
December 3rd, 2020

Dark, cold yet content
Slipping into a scene
So real and near
Close to the heart

Standing on a doorstep
Dark and drear
Enter here
Little dear

Authority talks
A long awaited exchange of words
Much needed, cooled and focused
Run along, small one
Go, see that which you have been without

Turn through a corridor
Off-white walls
To an opening
Doorway so dark and unsure
Within a familiar voice
A laugh from long ago

"A dream come true"

Out comes the angel
Glancing into that glittering green
A moment before shock
Embrace for at long last
In each others grasp

Feathers wrap around a shivering torso
Hold the fighter
Pulled in tighter
For nothing could pull us apart again

Taking a seat
Side by side, like old times
Pressing buttons and laughing
Victory and defeat

Then, a moment all is spun
Moving unnaturally
Held, told all is well
Embrace, then a moment
Of sweet roses

Over and held
White feathers around
As time crawls by
A comforting scent
Lingerings as I listen
To the heartbeat of an angel

Sweet is the sound
Of his every word
Comforting is the feel
Of his arm around my shoulders
Familiar and lingering is his scent
Heart melting is the only way
To describe the sound of his laughter
And gripping heartache
Is to describe waking up
Half expecting it all to be real
To awaken beside the angel
Only to awaken alone
Cold once again.

- Jay M
October 27th, 2020

Walls surround
Fabrics enclose
Music fills the space between
Coursing through cold veins

Walking sleep
Leave tea to steep
Warmth into the frigid air

Shaking hands
Cannot catch a running breath
Vision unfocused
Heart gunning

Take a seat
Take in the heat
Wrapped up in a sheet
Alone and ever fearful

- Jay M
October 23rd, 2020