As I came through the door
Taps the cat  meowed at me
As she crisscrossed the floor space
Staying a foot ahead of me
Glancing into the big closet or tiny room
Whichever ... Dad called it his study
"Hey dad " I yelled at the back of his head
" His quick glance meant "hey buddy"
I noticed moms face on the computer screen
'Oh!"I snapped " mom ... Hey we miss you "
"I'm not talking to your crotch "she laughingly barked
"Sit down ... Move the camera or move your *** Trent"
I compromised by doing all three as dad took a break
The face of someone I truly loved sat there
Looking at me
From over  three thousand miles away.
Three thousand miles away!
"Hey baby " she said in her cooing voice " How are you?"
"Got a job at Dannerlans ... Part time" I proudly engaged
"Don't let it interfere with" ...she couldn't stop and she knew...
I guess my stupid grin finally clued her in as she trailed off
"Half a world away and I'm still mom I guess. Dad musta.."
"He did ... Same thing.. And I won't. But what are you...."
"Don't you dare Trent " mock rage crossed her  face
As a few octaves fell out of her voice and I already knew
Here it comes.....a tsunami all the way from Japan
Putting my nose right to the camera and pushing on
I repeated "tsunami mommy  tsunami mommy  san
What can you do about it . you're way over there and I'm..."
" Gonna get it so bad .. When I get home mister "
:You're gonna look end up looking just like your sister"
"Oh ....Kay...  "I haltingly bounced her words round my mind
"I DONT HAVE A SISTER."
"Exactly"
Then I saw it... Set up and now....
Confusion and pride had my ammunition... just the facts
Dad arrived at that second with a coke for me and his beer
"Did you hear her ?" I asked him
" threating to make me a girl"
As I gave up the chair I heard that cooing soft voice sorta ....
..........GR OO ooowl ?!? While still softly cooing  "oh no no no...
Too good for you Bud...Buuud...Buddy?   You'll just disa..pear!"
Dad laughed first - drawing me in as I reluctantly let go.
"Nice try dear.... but you lost it coming round the outside corner"
What do you mean outside corner ..it was right over but too low
"Bye mom"  I said "got some homework to do " they were merged
Gone now for three month and three more to go .poor dad
His staunch had wilted within forty eight hours of her departure
But let's all pretend that you
never noticed the droop -a bit sad
Poor poor  dad ... Poor poor dad  I chimed as I climbed the stairs
He won't make it another three months . .. Very easy
I  haltingly caught my words as the downer that they were
As I scooped the elegant Taps  from the floor " but they'll make it "
I whispered into her ear. "Won't they girl? "Her answer was a purr

I'm thinking of joining the red cross
That's good...gets you out and about....
In the ...nei..bor....
"Okay .. Whats yet to be told ...spill
"They asked me to run the admin office" She
So you'll have to travel for a while  that's ok" (He)
"The whole admin office for foreign.... "  She let it trail......
Allright so you come back weekends
Ain't that far....to... (He)
      .......... ...Japan ....(She)
Dad........didn't  have any words to say
And the staunch started peeling away...right then and there
The love they shared
Might be compared
To historic qualities
Romeo and Juliet  sans tragedy
Bogie and Bacall  for longevity
Tracy and Hepburn for loyalty
Burns and Allen for ..for the comedy
So I knew.. as..  anyone else who  
Saw him day to day decline
That she was on her way home
By seeing the force of nature
He suddenly became
A human dynamo in preparation
For the reunification.

I walked through the front door
Sharon at my side and lacey in tow
"Go tell your brother to get in here "
So she yelled out the front door
"Trenton Dean Robertson get in here!"
Sharon and I met eye to eye
Bossiest little Seven year old....
"TRENTON now!"  I  yelled  out
"You better do what sis said"
He was now ten and tended to wander about
"I'm here "he said as he appeared
"Come on sis I'll beat you in...."
The last bit muffled
As they closed the basement door
And descending down the stairs

We both glanced into the closet
For that's what it really was
Dad sitting at the computer
And mom was on the screen
So I toted my load of groceries
As Sharon leaned in to say" hi "
And once we had supper going
I went to mix a drink and as I passed by
Dad said "son come here
Your mom wants to talk to you "
Besides we've been chatting  forever!
Then he whispered "I gotta go to the loo"
"Hi mom "I said as he departed
Leaving me to warm the seat
I'm not talking to your crotch
She said for at least the millionth time
There on the screen was the face
Of someone that I loved
Who never made it home that year
The flight was destined for history
Crashing into the Himalayas
Taking everyone on board
And the staunch became so rigid
And reality was simply ignored
He handed me a coke and opened his beer
Before resuming his vigil at the computer screen
That was his reality....his fantasy... and his hex
Some might say an old adage to sum it up
"IS IT LIVE.....OR IS IT MEMOREX?"

AS I drifted from the room they were merged.







..

"Count the sheep
To go to sleep"
Said my mom when i was little

"Count the sheep
Rather than weep"
And i listened
For that riddle

I listened for my mother
For my whole life
But for now

Now i must listen
When my heart
Subseeds to frown

And that riddle echos on
And my mind begins to spin
And without a doubt
I have to shout...
The sheep will soon run out

"Count the sheep
To go to sleep...
Until u count no more,
Then go to bed, and wait instead,
Until u know what you wait for."

There are depths within you
To which I cannot reach.
Where water drips
and echos in an
obscure cavern.
Where each drop leaves behind
its narrative,
on the pore from which it fell.
A story untold.
The vast space makes echoes of heartbeats.
But deafening silence resonated,
the day your heart skipped but one.

Why does the tips of my crown
Resemble the bars of this cage
With those outsiders who come
To view me outside of my reign

My fierce and untamed nature
Does not fit with the oppressed
A queen outside of her kingdom
Still does not make her powerless

My roars cannot break the glass
It's echos drive wild and restless
All I can do now is sit and pace
With all this power without an outlet

My sharp claws are nature's daggers
Not enough for this man made surface
I am fed with no need to hunt
I am no longer the primal huntress

I am separated from my kind
With no use for my defences
I learned to live for only those
Who desire my entertainment

Soon my freedom will come
My escape is simply inevitable
I lie in wait as I gather my strength
This cage doesn't define my potential

clanking clank slurp, ka-boom
the slop runs down a throat
merrily merrily terribly chilled
the gunk rolls down a throat.

the
forks spoons knives
plates salts salads
and wines
ding and echo like
soft butterfly tea parties
all gone rabid.
throughout the walls of pictures of food
and the butterfly echos echo
and dinging cups splash
and forks click and clock
(and and,..and!)

hold my breath.

clanking cubes of ice
bing against one another
Gluttonous Pig slobs them down with
a spoonful of spicy French soup
Pigman talks to Pigwoman; spittle flying out of
his piggy chops.
he stares at my forehead
they see my odd selection
she's laughing insanely at a joke
I'm holding my eyes inside my head
while

all on my plate sit the legs
of baby spiders
all on my dish are darting
sow eyeballs
pitcher plant garnish
and frozen grey custard for dessert; (echos still in the restaurant)
I gag outloud
the Fat Pigman scoffs at this
my heart pops inside its cage
and the waiter rolls his eyes at the mess.

it seems easy to believe,
in you and me
when the promise of the light in your eyes,
seeps through my indecision.

my fingertips sliding across the palate of your every inch.
the spaces i have touched painting, colors tracing my every outline,
intertwining between all the small details that define us.

red, like fire, conviction,
spreading across my chest with blinding heat.
echos of animosity, as the lingering flames crawl across the embers they once drew upon.

blue, breaking against waves of progress,
aches washing away with each pull of the moon.
White froths of inspiration.
the sun lay just above, you see?

forrest green, branching through my veins.
spinning life through my every corner.
your skin like spring,
leaves falling to my feet as you pull away once more.

grey, inhibitions.
tears, wrong way signs, fails and falters,
dancing themselves into a web,
tangling me into your response.

deep rust, connection.
iron lending to our foundation.
a place to plot the seeds of what could be.
a place to rest our old souls,
once our bodies can longer be seen.

The music started ever so lightly,
The radiant sounds of the violin mixes with the piano.
The echos danced from one surface to another
pleasuring the ear drums of many.
Flutes, clarinets chimed creating a higher harmony
to change the mood deep with in.
A constant heartbeat increasing.
The violins punch each note with suspense and love.
The instruments have their way with words,
in the darkness creating brilliant light.
The music slowly dies, the thunderous applause
travels through out triggering my success.
The room empties leaving me alone on stage to relive the night.
Reliving my creations.