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Jan 28 · 31
Mimi Hachiko Jan 28
A child shoved in an adults body
Craftsmanship pretty shoddy
Spirals plus games I cannot play
Atonements I could never pay
Alone but not yet still afraid
Being told I should have stayed
A cascade of regret and yet
I'm the threat
Jan 28 · 94
Mimi Hachiko Jan 28
Roll outta bed, calls to answer
Make a cup of motivation
This is the standard
Meds, Shoes, Music, Trains
While each Morning passes the same
Gotta hold back the symptoms of strain
You can feel that
You've got lava in your veins
that tends to go and drive you insane
but the day goes on, it gets a lil easier
Suppressants in the brain
crashing like a meteor
Gotta take more just to get through the day
Dont have another choice
God knows I've tried every other way
Background music plays, a variety
of pieces of your soul,
creates anxiety
You've heard it all before, but it brings you back
You get to live a little bit in those flashbacks
of the good and the bad, but the past all the same
back to a time where things felt more tame
The train comes to a stop.
Its your turn to get up and get off
But before you finish your walk
you've got time to cough
before you step back into the world
where you're livestock
Jan 15 · 122
Mimi Hachiko Jan 15
Stop the day, I want to get off
If you could see my face, you wouldn't scoff
Emotional discourse and violent pain
What I would do to start feeling sane
This is inhumane
I took your pills and slept and ate
I couldn't stop the coursing hate
The searing strings pull from my heart
Slowly tearing me apart
But freedom is so far away
And I cannot keep these tears at bay
With all these words I cannot say
while the mania gets to play
Nothing I do makes it sway
It's clung so tight to my chest
It's been so long since I could rest
I see no way out of this
as I fall down further into the abyss.
Man, I thought the depression was bad
I forgot all about the hold Bipolar had
Jan 8 · 35
Commit This
Mimi Hachiko Jan 8
This must be it
Welcome to the new year
The drinks were consumed
The plants were destroyed and the hor'deurves dismantled
I'm not smiling behind this fake veneer
I am often interrupted or completely ignored
But most of all I'm bored
I'm trying to find out if my words have any meaning
Lackluster and full of contempt when it always ends the same
Why won't you listen to me
Why did I come
Oh why did I come here
These humans all ****
I'd rather be home feeling violent and lonely
I'm not trying to sound so insincere
But the postcard that's taped to the freezer reads "wish you were here"
How I wish I could disappear
Dec 2019 · 37
My Ex, now my Metamor
Mimi Hachiko Dec 2019
Boundaries drawn
Anger pawned
I'm ready for a new dawn
To try again
Not quite as friends
But attempting to mend
To paint over the pain
To release the maintained
Its time to start in a new lane
We are not friends
But we will try again
For his sake
We will take
The pain and throw it away
Nov 2019 · 115
When you're around
Mimi Hachiko Nov 2019
Midwest love affair
I bend when I am bored
Late night liquor blue
Will lead me to the floor.
Can we fake it?
Can we make believe?
I'm so full of love
It deeply sickens me.
Nov 2019 · 338
It's alright
Mimi Hachiko Nov 2019
I had a night I had a day
I did one million stupid things
I said one billion foolish things
I'm not okay, I got a baseball bat beside my bed
To fight off what's inside my head
To fight off what's behind my meds
I'm lonely, lost in pain
Oct 2019 · 104
Boiling Over
Mimi Hachiko Oct 2019
"If you're so good with words, then be a writer"
They said
"It'll be a good release for you"
They said
Sure, it's all fun and games until you actually crack open your chest and pour out whats inside on white pages, now stained forever with the black ink of the cruelty of one's own mind.
Sep 2019 · 126
Daily Moods
Mimi Hachiko Sep 2019
Often I am upset that I have fall in love because then I have the stress of falling out of it.
I wish that I could see a sign that'd it'll all be okay but for now I'll try to do it anyway
I know things will be alright but I also know that it's always gonna be a fight.
I can make a change here but I'm also aware that the unknown can create a little fear
Lately I've been so tired of being pulled around but I know that to this life I am sorely bound.
Sep 2019 · 52
How Do I Choose
Mimi Hachiko Sep 2019
To take this or to take that
To decide can be a fast track
To the better or the worse
To a blessing or to a curse
Which decision do I make?
How to know which path to take?
Only I can decide for myself, but it's so hard to know to stay or go
Sep 2019 · 92
Once partner, now metamor
Mimi Hachiko Sep 2019
I trusted you and you wrecked
my dignity and respect
and now you just expect
me to forgive you
I'm not ready to be friends
We kinda skipped that step
and now I'm not sure I wanna go back
But you broke my heart
and that's just a start
of why I can't stand the sight of you
My secrets aren't safe with you
so how can you expect me to
Feel like we can ever be friends?
I miss my Triad.
Sep 2019 · 637
Cut my Hair
Mimi Hachiko Sep 2019
Often i am upset
That i cannot fall in love
But i guess
This avoids the stress of falling out of it
Are you tired of me yet?
I'm a little sick right now but i swear
When i'm ready i will fly us out of here
Sep 2019 · 239
Mimi Hachiko Sep 2019
What once came
has avoided me
what came
now comes
I fight for it
it passes me by
I play
I struggle
I take what comes
It moves past,
The absence hits me
I walk this line
I cry out
This seeped into my life
Sep 2019 · 238
Ships sailing away
Mimi Hachiko Sep 2019
To make connection
such stark satisfaction
evades me these days
I try to make conversation
Fight my own evasion
no luck, to my dismay
Every day is a challenge
I work to scavenge
my strength, whittled away
I just need a friend
Someone to depend
Before I lose my way
Aug 2019 · 248
Better For Now
Mimi Hachiko Aug 2019
Ive finally found some peace
The suffering seemingly ceased
These days have grown well
As I feel my chest swell
I bellow a song
It has been too long
I let it out low
It begins to slow
As I release the good feel
I bow and I kneel
I recognize this gift
A chance I could've missed
Jul 2019 · 85
No Home
Mimi Hachiko Jul 2019
I have no home
I call my own
In this house
I am a mouse
Who cannot see
A place to be
Where she belongs
It is all wrong
I make a hole
It takes a toll
On the foundation
Of my creation
Jul 2019 · 84
Mimi Hachiko Jul 2019
The girl with many faces
While trying to embrace it
Took an unexpected turn
Looking for more to learn
Rough roads ahead
Even with the meds
Swerving left and right
Speeding into the night
A crash has yet to come
But the night is young
She tenses for the impact
Prepared she is to react
The hardest part is the time
It takes for events to unwind
Into something less abstract
But now the damage is contract
Jul 2019 · 110
Freshly Stale
Mimi Hachiko Jul 2019
These days i used to know
They've all but come and go
These streets i used to roam
They all dont know me now
I made all new friends
With all new sidewalk ends
Spent days and nights
Learning all the new lights
After all I have done
I cant let myself shun
The hard work put
Into getting my foot
Started in a fresh direction.
Jul 2019 · 143
Not Today
Mimi Hachiko Jul 2019
You say you dont know who you are
You rearing to leave us a scar
I still dont understand the way
You sulk through life each day
Not that im one to pass
But im getting quite crass
With the way you say
Nothing is better today
Jul 2019 · 292
Tough Time
Mimi Hachiko Jul 2019
I’m sorry for what lies ahead
You may wish you were dead
It’s a scary time to be alive
When its your turn to drive
But try not to forget
Those things you think you’ll regret
They’ll be stories for the old
Stories deserving to be told
In all of the madness,
Only you have the access
To find the shining moments
The hard to find bonus
That makes the hard days worthy
Of all the sadness and worry
So make this time your own
Before you get all grown
This is for all the teenagers, make your own moments that shine in the darkness of young frustrations
Jul 2019 · 342
I'm allowed to not like you
Mimi Hachiko Jul 2019
You’ve given no reason
For me to feel this way
But all reasons aside
You’re such a cliché
The cheerleader type
You run and you play
But I remember a time
Your type would betray
Your voice pitch is high
Your IQ count can’t match
I really can’t see why
You’re considered a catch
But maybe I’m petty
Or jealous, or insecure
I think I’m just ready
To be called particular
I don’t like your type
I don’t fancy to be friends
I don’t follow the hype
You give me the bends
Jul 2019 · 223
Mimi Hachiko Jul 2019
This thing I must do
It is something new
I’m not pleased with it
Honestly, it makes me spit
But I must do what’s best
I must take this test
To be away from what I want most
To be torn from my dose
Of your attention and care
Oh, how is this fair?
My brain must come first
Such is this curse
The fight to think clearly
I want it so dearly
You’ve fogged my sight
Caused such delight
I’ve grown too attached
I must get unlatched
I will miss you so
But I must grow
Stronger for us
No need to fuss
It is only for a short while
Jul 2019 · 296
Shadow Man
Mimi Hachiko Jul 2019
He looks at me
What does he see?
There one second
Gone the next
Zero context
Like floaters in my eye
No need to be shy
I want to look at you
You’re nothing new
Hiding in the corners
I’m getting warmer
Meet my eyes
At least try
Mister Man I want to see you
I’ll hide in the shadows, too
You watch my every move
What do I have to prove
To let us make contact
Or are you just the abstract?
Jul 2019 · 192
Mimi Hachiko Jul 2019
I see you, do you see me?
Trying to be the best I can be
Tore down my walls
Started a foundation new
Just to build a life with you
But rebuilding proves the hardest part
Luckily, I have the heart
Strengthened by your love and care
To build a life that we can share
Jul 2019 · 224
New Home
Mimi Hachiko Jul 2019
Say goodbye to all you knew
This includes your family, too
Starting fresh can sound so great
Up until you take the bait
But once you jump, you can’t un-leap
For your choices you must keep
This does not mean all is lost
Simply put, you’ve paid the cost
After all you’ve been through
Now its time to start anew
You left behind what you outgrew
So you could be with those that love you.
Jul 2019 · 221
Built For One
Mimi Hachiko Jul 2019
You can't ask them to stay
You had hoped they may
But you can't be surprised
This path was not advised
You'll walk it anyhow
For the here and now
Doesn't meet your needs
You wander through the weeds
And wonder where it leads
You begin to concede
That this just might be
A path built for one
Jul 2019 · 637
Path Finder
Mimi Hachiko Jul 2019
She is night and day
She will run and play
She is confused and lost
But she knows the cost
For when all is said and done
She is the only one
Who will give it her all
Even knowing she will fall
Because who’s to say
What’s beyond the archway
Of fear and love
Of what you’re free of
To be standing halfway
Between what you can and may
Is a lost path to walk
Don’t be so shocked
When you find it alone
You have always known
It would turn out this way

— The End —