I feel like a destroyer
A dominant domain
Under siege
Attacked
On the left side of my brain

I feel words being
Taken from my soul
And lifted into another plane

I feel castrated
While menstrated
Drops of blood
Pour out of me again

I feel nothing

I feel creative scars
Trying to mend
Trying to help
But I won't let them in

I'm scared I won't be able
To block all the negative out
Which is intrusive and invasive
And never seems to stop

I feel soulful
Joyus
Loved
Alive

Until
The bread crumbles
In to rye
And I cry

Then I'll heal
Then this pain
Won't penetrate
My atmosphere

My heart
Has been lost
Kept under wraps
If softened
Then what happens next

If looked at
What will I find
Deepened rivers
Opened wide

Gushing
Rushing
She knows who she is

Understood
Misspoken
The real is here again
I must end

You downgraded yourself
For the sake of humanity
Get off your knees
And come with me
No more games
No lies
No flaws

Lay burdens beside cross
Fly underneath
Through is lost

Her eyes
Begin to flutter
Sterile lights flash by
Then drift

She sinks into
An open canvas
Where I catch her
In my memory spawn

Such a gentle
Nature I use
To get close
To her

Then I sit
Watch her
Listen to her murmmer

Existing somewhere
Between the papers
Paints and daffodils

Loving every moment
As hand reaches
Out to me

She wants me to
Drift with her
And just to
Exist

Nothing more
Nothing less

My Forest
RA
       I  N
    S
Slow ly
To sleep

Each count 1234
Just as sweet

Kumbaya circle of friends
Let's pretend to live there again

Maybe she's my dark love
And I'm trying to make her
More luminescent than she wants

He wrote serotonin
On his brainwaves

Made oceans to swim
Inside fascination
And wandering eyes
Instead of demons
At play

He willfully
Passed his away
Shared with another
Calming every wave

And on those days
His mind took haze
And the tools were overlooked
And instead Of giving
he took

She wants to feel important
She wants someone to see her talents
And smile and laugh

To share a common bond
A similar interest
Cause right now
She mostly feels alone

And the silence
Doesn't fill her
Her soul rots away

If she can't get away
From her inner demons
She fears she'll soon fade

Her inner child wants
to feel joy again
To sparkle and such

To light up her eyes
Is all she'll ever want

What common forms
Do you flow from

Down stairs or from above
Or in your own galaxies
Do you run?

What's on your lips
Cotton candy
Or sour gumdrops

Do you savor each flavor
Or simply let them drop
Like acid on paper
Like rain from above

Where is your gravity
Where do you run?

Inspiration
Muse
I must find some
This significant curiosity
Has hit me
And it controls desires
Incomplete infinite desires
Star staring
Sun stroking
Burst
Vibrant

Zoned out
Out of wordly time
In own space
In own mind
With filled up love
Lust flowing over

Inside
Pickets
Flowers
Dandelion
Satire
Willfull
Controlled
Fre­e essence
Run faster
Come inside
Sit down
Share share
Your desires

Everybody wants me to be
The queen Penelope
Of this palace

When I'm really
An up roaring *****
Holding a chalice

Not knowing
What I'm really like
Keeping it stuffed down
Really bites

When I see her again
Let me tell you
Every cell becomes alive
I awake

The complimentary serendipity
The particle charge of
Reading from the same mind
The quantum sharing of two universal whole beings of light
That somehow got entangeled
And when I see her
It all makes perfect sense
This and this and this...

The light touched my hand
And I was transformed
Back into the earth

The dirt I lay in
Seems to eat me
Knowing I have
no shovel
I began to delve

Mad at the world around
I began to see myself
Wanting to breathe
Just not on the surface

I've got to hide
Run away just for a short time
As the earthworms search me
I see a spotlight beneathe me

Someone else is waiting inside
They're there too
Just like i

Guess the lonely
Need the lonley

Hola
Se la vie
Goodbye resend
The same lines again and again
The pain runs faster
Inside my head meeting me again
You're open to anything
Right?

To write where no one follows
To lead where there is no path
To take hold of the mundane
And make something magical
That's what a poem does to your life

I bargin for simplicity
Of life
To come and haunt me

Instead of dry
Dusty leaves
Stone temple
Voodoo curses

And late night
Sun rides

Where does the bird weep?

You've released
in me a passion
and I can't resist
the satisfaction
of coming under
your spell

You have me
you've locked
me there!

Wasting my day again
Over thinking
All my problems
And asking myself
How I can fix them
Instead of acting
I'm stuck in a loop
Thinking...

What were told we are
We are not

Take time today
To write a different script

Say I love you
To your inner child

Smile at the heavens
And say Thank You

These members are not my own
They seep through the rapids
As I drown

They ask me questions
They tell me what to do
How to feel
And then condrtridict their own

*** am I supposed to do
When I can't get through?

Arrow through head
Back dot breathe

Her vase flew
Empty and forgoten

Her mouth
Still numb
From the everescent
Sonderless

POINT

The truth
Could **** you
If you let it

How do you
Make *** work for you
When you crave intimacy?

Its far more advanced
Than anyone knew
There are holes
You can fall through
And not have a freaking clue

The gap
Is another word
For depression or the blues
It seems my mind
Tears apart what it
Use to use
And makes me think
That I'm being abused
That every answer
To every thought
Is wrong
Pointless
Or incomplete

But on the other hand
It can be a good thing
A thing to use
A canvas
A poem
A way to reach out
To a few

So don't give up hoping
The fog will soon lift
I'm still obbssessed with
Finding my gift
Even through everyday
Chores I find life
A little too boring
But as soon as I start
To pour it seems
The gates start closing

Where is the open door?
What is it im searching for?

This time
Act athourative
Give pleasure to the pain
Demand respect
Be an as whole
As long as you don't hurt yourself

Counteract the regression
Look inside find peace and perfection
Hurry the hachet
And then go steal your key
Back from the wicked witch
And stupid ol monkey

I'd agree things
Aren't meant
To repeat
You act as if
It's good to feel rushed
Nervous behavior
Come to a stop

Let winds whisper
And trees blow
Go to places
No one knows

Then
And only then
Will they leave
You alone

Part one
Scene a million
Out of nowhere came a shadow
I looked to my right
And felt this strange
Oppressed and battle
Timeline jumping
Scattered
What the he'll does it matter
Stop and pursue
The red flag
That you draw

You can't hurt me
You are fictional past
Someone somewhere far away
Hurt you and I sit everyday
With your pain
I give it back

I run from the Present
Living in my past.

Punish me
Don't lash out
Take me
Don't drown me
With doubt

Have another taste
My loves like *******
Pure and innocent
The aftertaste will
Stay with you for days
And then you'll want another taste
Come back
I'll give you seconds
Thirds and fithes
Come and get me
Give me your kiss

I'll bite your lips off
Twist them into my wrath
Hold you down secretly
Until there's nothing left

Trace back
To when
Playgrounds whispered
Haunted memories

Redundant
Sound control

Freeze dried
Pebbles onto
River banks flowing

Following transcending ringing
Summoned
Feathered down
By scavengers

Hence feasible
Recipes

Unorthodoxed swallowing
Rocks churning appendixes

Violet ribbons
tied across
rosy red cheeks
Isee...
You smile
white teeth shining
as a crystal clear
drop of tear
crosses over the
ribbon & down
your salty dry
mouth

Sinking inside
is the beautiful lie
you're repeating
in your head
Yousee...
the slashes of
bright red imprinted
right beneath
the surface
pain swells
Isee...
your posture
abide you
a little ounce
of time
Framed
in the back
of your mind
Yousee...
backbone split
opening wings
Isee...
egale stance
& stories turned
back onto
the one
who needed
it all along
disappear
the mirrors
GONE

Ashes left ashes
it's all you'd ever
see in the
back of standing
on 2 feet

§wallow the Light

I craved
You in ways
My body
Never knew
Possible

Overacheiving
Overdose

Looking for
A haunting high

Set fire
To night drawn
Skies

In colors
So bright
My tongue
Burst
With electricity

And all truth
Spilled on top
Of me

Like a mountain
Of fantasies

You came and
Saved me

Raw
Wet
Details
Fine art

Veins
Soaked
Blood
Fine art

Corrupt
Broken
Worned

Complete
End
Sworn

Abide
My love
Never look
Back again

"There's a Maturity
in the cleverness
of calmness."

I'm washed away
By the shame
I face

Skin yellow
Heart bruised

Open
Bleeding

You ride
Inside my hair
You are eveywhere
Green beauty

With buds a color
Too perfect to burn
Green beauty
I make you my home

Pink
Passion
Pulse

Forgive me for what I'm about
To do
Draw you inside of me
So now you can see
What it's like to let go
Of the World and venture
On the edge where
The girls play and shadows
Come in

Where the dark purple
Skies submit to
A land of candy canes
And butterflies

I don't know where to come
I keep telling you

Sure you do, you always do

Then why do I still question it

You do everytime,
let go and unwind
peace, harmony, relaxed mind, body, spirit, and soul
Let go
Let go
Let go

He wore crooked windows
Beside morning coffee
And her spilled milk

Taken part one
She rapped the wind
With her Cold lack of
sufficational fixated states

Letting blossoms grow out
of her mouth
Forgetting to wash
Before she ate

Please forgive me
While I partake in sin

The frying pan
Is too big
For your fat head

Her electricity vibrated across the red room
She was chemically aroused twenty four hours and one
Endignantly dilluted by her parents influence
She was systemmatically insincere

Yet one taste would send you on a trip no ones ever taken you before
As if the world melted away and you were suspended in mid air by her clear iridecent mind blowing energy of innocence

You start to feel the tingles rapid vibrations encased like a bodysuit just perfectly fitted for you begin at the edge of your toes

This energy climbs your entity as your mind numbs
You are nowhere else
There is no time or space here
You are in your own pyramid
You leave the earthbound
In another place beyond earthbound

The light out weighs
This tunnel now
And all The dark clouds
Have faded

Make use of your time
To keep them out
Dont get frustrated
The hate will dissipate
Let me melt them away

Listen to me inside
I am your heartbeat
I am your story cloud
Brighten me

The tombs
Laid full
Beneath my
Feet again tonight

Tomorrow my
Shoulders will
Buckle
While my body
Take flight

And the
Lack of
Ancient trust
Will once
Again
Come into
Question

As I
Lay inside
The sculpted
Hollow

And dance
Again
With this
Melody
That's played
a thousand
Times

And let it **** me
Because I was too
Afraid to let
You see me

Wired wood
Carving inner mind
Into portraits
Of shoelace desire
Of things unbeknowst

Symptoms
Suicide

System in a panic
Finding answers few

What brought
This forth
From the back layers
Onto the floating
Clouds
Which laid
Dormant for
So long

Why are you here now?
And *** do you want?
I was doing
Just fine!!!

Erupted corrosion
Distorted perception
I need time
All I need is time

To let the air
Blow thru
These cracked
Pencil shavings

Reaching my tinder
To set my heart
On fire

We all pour expressive concrete
On our faces
From time to time
We all lay paralyzed by our
Own imagined fears

What we do next
Is what cuts the cord
Or plunges the knife

One day she woke up
And he wasn't there.

What are we reaching for
Surface
Graves

what if the sky
didn't fall so
blue tonight
and all the wishes
i had ever made
on crystalized stars
suddenly came true

I liked it better
When we fought
Then I could get attention
Then you'd call me out

Dear sweet attention
What's my name
Slap me
Berate me
Carmalize me instead

Make me pretty
Attention will follow
Many beds

Till I collapse underneath
My pillow instead
And crawl to walk
And walk I shall stay

Firm and steady
Not wishing I was dead
Past washed
Past watched
Not to show up
But to feel me
leave my IMPRINT

Madness magic
Same thing

I'm tired
Of trying to
Fit into a box
Which has no category

To belong
Is where I want
To begin

Isolated
Trauma state identity
Who cares
As long
As your grinning

I can't even
Do that anymore
I feel there's
No one out there
That remembers
My name

When I want
To collide with
My words
And unite

This feeling
Of guilt
Strengthens
My desire

****** up
As it sounds
No one
Does care

So why are they
Still FOLLOWING me
Everywhere