The bombardment of messages was deafening
Every new message pounded at my head
As I wore a pillow over my head, protecting
My eyes closed shut as my body shook
Rage started to brew, but
I knew better than to look
At the betraying notifications, this much was true
"Patterns seemingly can't be broken"
Were some of the last thoughts on my brain
As I fell into a deep sleep in a sea of tears
Just some feelings I've felt as of late. Considering the pandemic and the lockdown, I haven't been taking care of myself all that too well in communicating with the outside world.
This is a short way of putting my feelings out there, but also an opportunity to try to connect with others who are feeling the same way at the moment. We got this. The year is almost over. Reach out to close friends and family members. Make new connections. And if you just need a stranger to vent out, message me. Keep pushing through :)
i sometimes float
in the kitchen
where to go.
the time oozes
from every crevice;
the digital numbers
on the oven
fall away like weak
magnets slip from the fridge
like my mind as i linger
on the floor, cradling
a cup of tea
yearning for an urge,
a drip of
but here i am, boring
frustration that frolics
telling me how good
i will never be
that’s all i ever do:
admiring others that do
more than me;
i am good at loving
but what will that ever
i sometimes laugh at myself
instead of being flattened,
i blow myself up
sometimes i am plastered
against a wall,
and i give up
and blend in.
Why is it always trash night?
Just another small thing I fight
Like tailpipes on the highway
And timelines that go sideways...
It's the trivial things that eat me up
Nibble by nibble, right through my gut
Don't sweat the small stuff?
****, that sounds nice
But what if the small stuff
Is your entire ******* life.
“How do you feel?” I ask again. I, knowing the answer, poke my head into the lion's den. I feel the ghost of your frustrations floating about in the confined space. It haunts the room as our shadows strangle each other.
“What is the opposite of homesick?“ You ask.
“Homesick, ” I answer.
A 53 word short story
You thought you could tame
That little timid boy
Mould him into your--
Spite and darkness
Annihilate his Lambent soul
And leave him benighted
Just because ---
He was filled with love and light
And his happiness
You're battered by his affection
You reified your lies against him
Painted him villain around the his hood
You couldn't bear to see a smile in his face
You've awaken a monster
He now has spoken malediction
On your soul
So what now? Huh.!
Can't fight the demon you let loose
Can't control him
And you still trying to control the young lad
Those his cuts
Marks your end
The Demons you made
Are in their fullest power now
Ready to be unleashed
At his sight,
You would cringe.
Living can sometimes be depressing to a person with a good heart.
They clap our backs, nod their heads
Look down and distant smile
When we tug at their t-shirts
And ask to be heard
Their gazes wander, and block their ears
Sneak a look at the television
They sit us down, telling us to talk
And in between, stand up when their phones ring
They tell us that you will do great things some day
That the world rests upon your hands
You will climb to the top and pull each other up
But keep pushing us down instead
They tell us that you are the future
And dive out of our thoughts
They think it is an excuse
For sizing us up, and declaring us not enough
Not yet, they say. Not now, they murmur
Have you ever thought that
We don't want to be the future
Because we need to be the present?
That we don't want to lead the world
But instead, just live in it?
That before we want to do things that are great
We just want to live in a world that is?
I can't tell if the stinging in my eyes
Is from my tears
Or from keeping my eyes
Open in the rain
Both end up blurring my vision anyway.
I don't mind though.
Because if there is a God,
And he's up there,
Then at least I know
He's as frustrated as I am.
And he deserves to be.
blank pages and crumbled papers
i scribbled down then throw it later
inkless pen and broken proses
tragic poetries like thorns of roses
caged in darkness
chained by sadness
i have no tears left to cry
i'm gonna take a break,
g o o d b y e
got so many ideas but i have no words to put.
I flew above the horizon
Soar high with the eagles
Flew up high to cross the great sea
With my magnificent wings
I joined the clouds on the skies
I flapped and flapped tirelessly
To reach the paradise
On which I can almost see.
The eagles gracefully flew over the mighty mountain
They reached the other side
They have entered their destination
A beautiful paradise.
It is my turn to ascend like them
I charged, pushed myself higher
But I lost my grace, I hit a tree
I fell down to the dirt
I tried to rise from the ground but I can't
Tried all my might but my wings are broken
I can no longer fly
I can no longer land on paradise.
you must untangle yourself
from the nets of my mind
so you too can swim
into the sea of confusion
threw me into cold deep waters
did you know I couldn't swim?
it's easier to ignore the guilt
just do whatever's best for you
I've lost the knife to cut you loose
I'm not even sure I care to
so if you strangle for a minute?
you've already slaughtered me