Eyes blinded by passion as you grab my hair
Claimed as yours, you display proudly
And I  cannot hold still
Desire burns hot
You stick your fingers through my smile and make room
Room to claim me as yours, once and for all
A fistful of hair positions you inside of me
Eyes water with depth
Trying to breathe, I squirm
Held gently but firmly in place
A naughty smile and a Twinkle in those hazel eyes
No, you will not win,
Not this time.
For I am not yours
You are mine
My rod of molten steel
My elixir of life
Mine
Hold me in place and take it home
My eyes never leave yours
You watch intently as you disappear, repeatedly
I can't help but smile, though I have no room to do so
Warm and wet i take what you give
And when I am released
I find myself sharing the joy

I can see light through the wall,
as it is wearing thin with age.  
It makes it even bleaker to exist here.

Falling in line with the rest
Forgetting that life owes nothing
Knowing better, yet, still being dragged to the dregs of humanity
Weighted by words, chained to emotion
Drowning in doubt, scraping across broken standards
Settling into the remnants of the wasted dreams of a people

What do I have on this empty white surface
This wordless page mocks my pen
There is no life, there is no death
There is only... (dot, dot, dot)

Emotionless indifference pulled to the unknown
A course not yet plotted
A map, as yet, undrawn
Precision of thought can't connect the dots
There is only... (dot, dot, dot)

No fear or apprehension
A new world awaits
The first step, a new life
Still, there is an unwritten story
And I am mocked by this empty white page
There is only... (dot, dot, dot)

The slightest whisper of the warmest touch
The breath of motion in the still of night
Blood rushes to the surface leaving fire in its wake,
as it follows the slightest movement,
the faintest touch, the longing for more
Electricity jumps the gap
Intensity amplified by the exquisite ache
Stirring deep within
Radiating shock waves that tether
Two becoming one

Do not let me trust your
Mouth full of lies
Kisses of saccharin-sweet hemlock
Eyes of angelic innocence
And heart of iron, forged in Hell
Set me free before you hurt me
Let me go and fair thee well

Your presence is tangible
Across the vast expanse
Yet, I hear not your voice
I feel not your longing
Mine, is the only heart I hear
Alone, for the first time in eternity
Alone, wrapped in your essence
Just a whisper of warmth
A choice all your own
To be alone
A choice that you have forgotten
Includes me
For we flow throughout each other
Still, here we are
I feel you trying not to feel me
And I close my eyes
Praying death over a life that begins here
And ends without you
'tis not a choice could I make
'tis not a life...alone

There is a light
In that light, there is clarity
With clarity, one can see
The error of their ways
The truth of who they are
Their deepest desires
With clarity
One can become
Who they were always meant to be
One only has to open their eyes
To see

Superhero heavyweights
Alter ego misfits
Scandalous fall from grace
Public pain and private parties
Golden idol ego trips
Wrath of God
Not wrath of Kahn
Read a book
Take a look around
Stop flying high
Indestructible
Too messed up to see
The damage done
Idolaters be dammed
First commandment
Godless society
Superhero wannabes
Glory and the fame
Microscopes
Expand the putrid that make-up cannot mask
Everybody’s business
Do as you say not as you do
Becomes, monkey see monkey do
Flying high without a net
Newbies falling from the sky
That is not empowerment
Luck is not strategy
And life is not a game
Find importance
Both within and without
Then dawn your cape
And fly away
To help your fellow man
Not just your selfish greed

Gilded cage so small and tiny
Even singing comes out whiny
Stinking of fake fresh and piney
Tis the season
Leaking water warm and briny
With good reason

Christmas cheer and glasses toast
Loved ones smile and laugh and boast
I sit perched upon my post
A tinsled column
Invisible reluctant host
A heart that's solemn

A longing for a love so distant
The melancholy is persistent
A smile could erase it in an instant
On a face cherubic
For my heart is not resistent
It's theraputic

So that smile that is perfection
Is mirrored in my own reflection
Without a thought about rejection
Hallucinations
About the subtlest inflection
In Salutations

Surrounded by the merrily intense
With drunkard tendencies immense
A bar with all accoutrements
They pound tequila
Drinking away the sacraments
Oh yes, I feel ya

Merry time with old Kris Kringle
Guests all lubed enough to mingle
Mistletoe hangs and sleigh bells jingle
Gifts homemade
Tables adourned and glasses tingle
Gold brocade

Still I sit all caged and flightless
Blind to joy all sad and sightless
Drink could make it hurt a mite less
I'm going backward
Laying here all limp and lifeless
Broke and fractured

Surrounded by the fake and vexing
Artificial and quite perplexing
Reality they are rejecting
The devil may care
Bellies bare and muscles flexing
Lost underwear

So ******* dancing to the jukebox
Lost alone here in the boondocks
There is no snow upon the rooftops
Ahead they forge
Find a room before that thing pops
It's so engorged

Neighbor ***** all dressed in orange
Wearing gold to make the poor cringe
Stripping time to fill her syringe
I'll be her hinderance
Still too drunk from her last binge
Faulty remembrance

Ridding riff raff from the party
People still drunk on Bacardi
Noxious gasses burp and farty
With toilets makeshift
Worn out makeup on the smarty
She needs a facelift

Time to let the people go
Too tired to keep watching the show
Drinking hard and walking slow
Verbose yet listless
Honey I don't want to know
It's not my business

Rolling the dice time after time
Adding up points to bank a roll
Betting the odds in numbers and rhyme
Losing it all starts taking its toll

Betting the odds though it isn't a game
A thousand points at the roll of a die
Losing your heart in a useless hand
As you gamble your love upon a lie

Open eyes can see as it all floats far away
Though denial runs deep even in the face of self-realization
Standing still in hopes that a small part will linger
Visions of yesterday's happiness shade today's shame
Different hues can tighten the squeeze
Small bits of who you thought you were run out
Lost in the vast nothingness that has taken hold
Twisted views of reality skew the mind against you
In a good moment there is peace
Too quickly forgotten, too quickly lost
Searching to find a shortcut back to who you want to be
Realizing in darkness that maybe, that never existed
Wondering if in this so-called truth lies the reality of others
Is this who you are?
Is this who they see?
You can choose to live in the worst thoughts of you,
Or believe in the best version of yourself

Chasing the wind to learn its secrets
Whispering in your ear just out of touch
Following the mystery that it uses to tease
Inescapable longing lures enticingly
The world forgotten on a summer breeze

So fragile in its exquisite form
Crystalline and glorious
Transparent to those who wish to see
Tossed around by the unworthy
Dropped and shattered
Crushed under pounding foot
In the sun a billion pieces sparkle
By moonlight it looks like stars
How beautifully broken the heart can be

I am in love
For the first time
In the briefest of moments
On the shortest of days

I am in love
With a person of great value
Whose opinion has a voice
Who found peace within

I am in love
With a heart that is ever overflowing
Eyes that see beauty in all things witnessed
Lips that speak naught but truth

I am in love
Completely and utterly
With the utmost honesty
With the promise to remember this feeling always

For I am in love
In the briefest of moments
On the shortest of days
With the person I have finally become

I am in love

Stuck in a time long since passed. Heart emptied hopeless. Faces blur along with the days. Nights linger incessantly, haunting all that ever was.  Dreams tease happy.  Sun kills dreams. Time makes scars. Distance allows the fallacy to continue.  The lies turn daily mantra.  The mantra into perceived reality. Reality into dreams, the dreams into nightmares.  Sun cannot **** nightmares.

Hollow glass hearts bleed
Puddle will evaporate
To exist no more

Joy-filled memories leach all hope for future joy.  Heart crushed to powder. Powdered hearts cannot bleed.  Dead hearts cannot feel. Memories, overflow with the shadow of love's embrace. Pain jabs the senses like lightning.  Still, the heart has ceased to exist.  Calluses fill the space that scars cannot.  False emotion permeates the truth.  Future acquaintances see beauty behind dead eyes.  As they close in, icy breath freezes long enough to drain their heart to beat some life into the one lost. Walking away with minimal pulse as their heart is hollowed and bleeding.  Soon too, that puddle with cease to exist.  

**Life's casualties
Joy begets pain begets joy
Hope dies most quickly

Love transcends time and distance
Death cannot quell the loving heart
But each mile weighs a thousand pounds
And we are a thousand miles apart

Darlin' the universe has spoken
And rained down from the skies
Birthed reality in our souls
As it opened up our eyes

Life is bathed in hues of gold
The heart now beats in time
With souls who searched millenia
To be complete, sublime

But each mile weighs a thousand pounds
And we are a thousand miles apart
Love transcends time and distance
Even death can't quell a loving heart

heart pounds like crashing thunder
at the mere thought of the idea
blood burns hot
and time stretches through space
our eyes meet...again
and steam fills the air
a quick lean without a flinch
and electricity breathes life
into a wink and a nod
and the nerves rise
a smile, and blood rushes to the surface
hands gracefully glide over flesh
chain reactions need no words
a gasp and a sigh
attest unspoken passion
lips meet and sparks fly
as breath is stolen, so is a kiss
then so is one more
dancing tongues and fireworks
synergy and floods
blood drains to fill
and fills to feel
the heat rises
taking with it the knowledge
that tomorrow is when "never" comes

At 18 you are not who your parents perceive you to be
At 18 the mistakes you make are yours alone
At 18 you learn life's lessons can be brutal
At 18 you think a broken heart is a mortal wound
At 18 you don't know who you are
At 18 you have dreams

At 18 the world is yours
At 18 you CAN do anything
At 18 you can be who you want to be
At 18 you can make your own choices
At 18 setbacks do not defeat you
At 18 you are free

At 18 there is always time

I awoke in a dream
Surrounded by a bilious familiarity
Angry shades of the drying blood of hope
Caked over venomous fangs of discontent
Stagnant shadows of effluvium
Emanate from the molten flesh
Of this creature I seem to know

But how, how do i know this putrid soul
This being, born of irascible acrimony
Seething breaths sear my senses
As I feel the pounding heart
Scream within it's chest
Aflame with the atrocities it has incited

Yet, in it's gentle eyes there is no malice
There is only the reflection of an angel
Gossamer vestments blow in the stillness
So effulgent in the darkness
Again, familiar and uncomfortable
It's eyes bore into mine that reflection of heaven

I could not see myself in those eyes
That gaze seemed to hypnotize in its polarity
As I floated unseen, I looked at this being
Seething miasmata while reflecting a seraph
Acidic tears of truth fell from within my poisoned soul
As the creature and the reflection merged in the bluest flame

And transformed my spirit into flesh
I am both the reflection and the being
Living the anguish of the truth of what I am
Fighting every  moment to be less than and more than
Pretending that I do not embody the dichotomy of bile and bliss
Seraph and succubus
The truth and the lie

The howling dog does more than bey at moons
He heralds nightmares calling in the dark
It seems that shadows heighten canine fears
For silence only takes control at noon
Sleep deprived, the sun is way too happy
Slumber awaits beyond the bedroom door
With closing eyes, the dreams begin their show
Flowers dancing, and cherubs watch from clouds
Gnawing, gnashing, gruesome scenes awaken
Barking howling doggies never sleeping
Closing eyes flash red in remembrance
A blind date's couch can offer a reprieve
In return there are no expectations
After lunch no future plans are made
Left longing for peaceful slumber at home
Trade with darkness, looking rather cozy
The Devil's beasts have conquered one more soul

Draining Hell-fire through fingertips. Fully immersed in emotion, not just the memory.  Reliving the feeling of tortured souls while bleeding ink into words.  Slinking from an ashen past into a jet black future. The present lost, forgotten, left behind in transition from shadow to darkness. Shattered souls resuscitated and shared for the mere pleasure of others.  there is no time to wallow, no self pity. That is not found in this place, burned off as sulfur in the brewing of a demon.  

She comes alive
Through yesterday's ashes
Succubus divine

Such a pretty little package. Sugar and spice and everything that isn't meant for human consumption.  Poison mind seething, searching for the vulnerable, the gullible, the innocent, and the sweetly vile.  Spewing forth honesty in liquid courage.  No need to lie when eyes believe what they see.  Beauty in the moonlight, sweetness in a smile, desire in a twinkle of Hell in the eye.  Oh, that bit of Hell is a lot to chew.  Take a bite and choke.  Lost forever are pieces of you, your heart, your soul feeds her beautiful demons.  Her flawless imperfections beguile and betray the mind, as those demons consume her divinely

Entranced by beauty
He stalks his prey in music
She absorbs his soul

Honeysuckle perfume taints the air.  And the honey will never again taste as sweet. Swimming mind lost in those ruby lips and laughter like cracking glass heard as tinkling bells.  Ensnared in the thorns that hook the flesh by surprise. The warmth of the fire masks the sting. All part of the dance.  Writhing, hypnotic friction disguised as emotion, disguised as desire, disguised as love.  Motion so fluid whispers depravity behind the eyes of an angel.  There is nothing else.  She gets what she wants. You believe you have her right where you want her, but it is she who has lead the way from the first whiff of the stench of you as you entered the room.

He believes he won her
She devours his essence
vanishing at once

As she is craved, she burns your soul.  This demon who drains Hell-fire into words.

There is no way to prepare
for the day that the reality of monsters
lies squarely on your shoulders.

One day
in one split second,
it will never be the same.

Walk into a room
There lies the new one
There lies the one who has your heart
Blink and all's forgotten
No scars to hint of pain
Nothing left but happiness to gain
And so you hold on and you're held
Effortlessly there is more room in your soul
Days so readily wasted
Just looking in those eyes
Melting the outer shell
That took a lifetime to build
It is so easy to love you

A life lived in black and white.  No time for middle of the road.  Lines drawn straight and narrow.  Passion, only with rules.  Love, only as stated.  A heart filled with admiration, adoration, and caring.  Nothing missing from the list of "supposed to".  All boxes checked off. I's dotted and T's crossed.  Perfect on paper, perfect to onlookers, perfect in bed.  Never a thought of something missing.  All boxes checked.  Not able to settle into a life.  Unable to blur the lines.  Must be good, always good.  Mistakes happen, but not on purpose.  Not by choice.  

Always the good one
Right is the only option
Mistakes...still happen

Before we fully become, life is full of confusion.  Who we are and what we do are enmeshed within our surroundings, our perspective, our emotion, and our lives.  Pulled together, yet fighting every step of the way.  Beyond our understanding of purpose or passion.  Afraid of everything we are as yet unable to understand.  Trying to get through to the next phase without falling too hard.

Peers skew vision
Rules confine the innocent
Love hides unnoticed

Grown into a life of checks and balances.  A nice life, a good life.  Loved by many, yet alone.  Always alone.  Able to love, willing to love, believing love is what is being lived.  Unseen circumstances. Friendships remembered.  Longing, pulling toward one another.  More than passion could ever be.  More than who we thought we were.  The need to be right, to do the right thing, is stomped unrecognizable by emotion.  The past melts into the future.  Is a life unfulfilled, yet loving, enough to maintain, or is love supposed to be so full of passion that it takes you outside the box?  

The thought of a life
A love left unrealized
A world in a cage

A chance to live in happiness. Fires burn in body and mind.  No sorrow, no regret.  Pushed by one into another.  Two hearts alone run to each other.  Holding fast to all that is real.  Yet casualties will line the road forever tainting all that could be good.  Checks and balances. Pros and cons.  Does one give up happiness to maintain the perfect facade, the perfect family, the "perfect" life?  There is no perfect.  There is only what is.  The possibility of happiness could be short lived.  Hearts broken and bridges burned.  Broken families, broken lives.  Happiness could be tangible.  Happiness could be real.  Pros and cons.  What price shall be paid.  When should love lose and happiness not be a goal?  Choices, pain, there is no fairness.  There is no black and white, there are no boxes in which to fit.  

Straight and narrow life
Checklists, I's dotted, T's crossed
Thwarted by passion

I want to ruin sweetness
to turn him into the animal I know lives inside
to temper anger with restraint and lust with true desire
a transformation from pet to wild beast
I want to rule his passion not his heart
I want to command him
with the heat of desire and pain of longing
I want him to relinquish control and give in
I need to teach him what it means to be greedy and lustful
he will submit and reap the rewards

In shadows they live
On the other side of sunshine
In the corner of the eye
Just this side of vision
Insanity on the cusp of reality
Truth in duality of time

In echoes they speak
Mumbles behind everything
Calling out a name
Underneath the traffic noise
Whispering in words a thought can hear
Irradicating silence

In the very air they hang
A change in scent in the air
The stink of someone else's memory
A grating plea for a void of exsistnce
To the keeper of dreams and nightmares
As the coin flips, before the call

Stale air crosses the lips of past love
Time has turned the sweet; repugnant
Until the heart flutters again in hope,
Veiled emotion builds a wall
Weathered by time, or crumbled by loves successor

At one time, for a time
The flowers danced beside me
The fields swayed with the music of our hearts

At one time, for a time
My heart was overflowing
Knowing love would never leave us part

At one time, for a time
There never was a question
Doubt was simply a word we never felt

At one time, for a time
The ugly glistened lovely
For through your eyes the darkness seemed to melt

At one time, for a time
The ladybug would giggle
As it flew in loops around your smile

At one time, for a time
Your love would heal my sadness
Oh to live that one time, for awhile

Waves roll onto the shore.  The sound, soft and steady but not perfectly so. Far enough to watch outside the halo of town. Yet, still within reality's grasp. Warm sand embeds itself in nooks and crannies. The balmy breeze blows tresses free. No longer constrained and swinging wildly in the evening air.  Enticingly yellow sunset with clouds like meringue and white smoke.

Painted golden sun
Sleepy on the horizon
Awed into silence

A short drive in God's hands and it seems a better place.  That buttercup and frothy sky heals unknowingly.  Lapping sea and glorious firmament are proof enough.  What is faith to a doubter?