I hate to think that someday I'll be no more
I hate to believe its the only tunnel to immortality
I loathe that the uncertainty is quite normal
And that never seeing you again is a possible eventuality
Because without you in it, it wouldn't be an after life
You have made this life a comfort midst the thorns
You have been my hook up every impossible cliff
The joy and the unbreakable strength in my borns
I fear to admit after my last breath I may never see this, your face
It's the most fascinating sunset I've seen throughout my journey
It's something I wish I find in Heaven or Hell, whichever place
If I hadn't met you I'd still believe the sweetest element is honey
I cannot stand leaving your smile curved downward
Yet that has to happen on my last goodbye
How can sadness be the ultimate and final reward
That everyone gives their soul mate when the time comes by?
I think I would want to kiss your lips in paradise after a million years
And to see you again after I'm gone, I'd cry a trillion tears

What is future without its view from the elevation of the past?
What is a road but a path where many have passed?
What is first if there's none to decorate it with the red ribbon of last?
What is a blessing without seeing the cursed?
What is taste but the opinion of the tongue?
What is love but the foolishness of humanity?
What is romance but in the beautiful ballads sung?
What is risk without the icing of uncertainty?
What is freedom without the chain of prison?
What is wisdom without ability to reason?
What is hope without the faith glowing ember?
What are memories if we cannot remember?
What is crime but the wrong side of the law?
What is the road without a destination?
What is fame but unnecessary mention?
What is arrow without his little bow?
What is a pendulum without a string?
What is a wedding without a ring?
What is human without a being?
What is music if we cannot sing?
What is tomorrow without today?
What is sunrise without a ray?
What is belief without a prayer?
What is age than turning gray?
What is a struggle without a cause?
What is a prescription without a dose?
What is a question without an answer?
What is possible if it isn't curing cancer?

You could leave on the next jet plane
And go to whatever destination
Without having to explain
Without I asking any question
You could walk out that door
With your bags and baggage
Take the best car in the lot and go
Covering whatever milage
You can walk away at any time
Incase you feel loving me is tiring
Satiety has never been a crime
Even as a child things kept expiring
You are free to leave though its bound to hurt
Venture far away but I'll still have you in my heart

There's a thing about these shards
That I can not define with words
There's a thing about the pain
Though some say pain is gain
There's a thing about today
Keeping my emotions at bay
There's a thing about leaving
A thing that defines living
There's a thing about history
Manifesting in mystery
There's a thing about affection
Demanding great attention
There's a thing about the clouds
Exuded by dissatisfied crowds
There's a thing about streams
Going by like time shattering dreams
There's a thing about tomorrow
That carries a stench of sorrow
But there's a thing about the present
Which I discovered of recent
That the best moment of life is now
And you cannot afford to bow
There's a thing about change
That always look strange
But if you cannot fight, bite
You can't afford to give up the fight

You are a rhyme I'd write over and over
With the entire page reading lover
You are a cloud of promise hanging above
You are worthy of undying love
You are a song which doesn't fade
With a lifestyle that few have led
You are a flower created to outshine a rose
You make me proud calling me yours
You are a bullet I'd gladly take
A dream from which I'd rather not wake
You are these emotions I'll never decipher
You are a mystery by far
You are the courage building inside
A treasure only seen because I can't hide
You are a mountain I'm willing to hike
The hardest puzzle rooted in my psyche
You are a queen even without a crown
And I would gladly be your clown
You are a choice I'd make with my eyes closed
The only matrix I'd gladly have transposed
You are a panorama every man desires
A she-wolf every Alpha male wishes he sires
You are a future I badly ache to have
A satisfying life I believe I deserve

Wanted love to bring peace
Not only because I needed a kiss
I wanted love to answer my question
I wanted love for some inspiration
I wanted love to bring me contentment
I wanted love to come by with forever
I wanted love,at least the statement
I wanted love more than to be clever
I wanted love because I needed care
I wanted love for a little mystery
I wanted love because I needed repair
I wanted love to erase my etched history
I wanted love because everyone wanted
I wanted love because I wanted heat
I wanted love because by single I was haunted
I wanted love only until I found it

I wish we met when her tarmac road was still mellow
Then when she still danced to the Congolese tune "Mbelo",
I wish we met when she could not stare in the eyes
Right when she was too shy to tell any lies,
I wish we met when she was still under her Mama's apron strings
So innocent, when she still trusted human beings,
I wish we met when she did church each and every Sunday
And had no thought of bearing a guilty conscience someday,
I wish we met when she saw the world for her best, not her worst
When the balloon of her ***** wasn't yet burst,
I wish we met when her future was still blinding bright
Wish I'd seen her in the dawns of her life, not the nights
When she knew no whiskeys or beers but only Fanta and Sprite
So that she wouldn't get herself in trouble and drunken fights,
I wish we met when she still had dry “unkisssed’’ lips
When she thought kisses were an unhealthy swap of saliva,
I wish we met when she hadn't developed attractive hips
When she wasn't a depressed Heart-wreck survivor,
I wish we met when she still believed in fantasy and fairy tales
And had a honest fascination for cowry shells,
I wish we met when she flamboyantly wore her natural African hair
When she still thought herself naturally beautiful and fair,
I wish we met when studies hadn't corrupted her mind and stolen all her hours
When she still smiled at the sight of frail petals of red rose flowers,
Wish we met when the movie title that described her ******* isn't “Olympus
Has Fallen”
But probably “Hard Boiled”, “Only the Strong” or “Swollen”,
I wish we met when she had faith in things like weddings, when her soul was
a spring of hope
When she hadn't lost respect for such societal norms preferring to elope,
I wish we met when she still respected danger
And risked not accepting courtesy from every rich stranger,
I wish we met when she believed true love existed in the world
Maybe then she'd believe my each and every word,
I wish we met when she still honestly needed a friend
I’m sure I’d be there to love and care for her till the end.

FOR Mwima Zubair Naser*
(Gone too soon,when still in bloom
In the line of duty,what a pity)
In memory of you I'll always cry
I won't stop no matter how hard I try
Why do you have to promise
And then just pass on like this?
Especially when you are all gone
Leaving us in this world on our own
Did you have to leave this young
When I lack any beautiful speech
On my saddened tongue?
When the ball is still on pitch?
You had Samson's courage
Like a car with shocking milage
Did you have to go when I need you
Did you have to evaporate like morning dew
From the fragile petals of our youth
Did you have to join the boots?
It isn't fair to go when I cannot send you off
When I haven't condolence,not half a loaf
Did you have to go so soon
And leave my heart out of tune?
Say hallo to Wilber and the others
The thought of you all really bothers
I've never been one to say goodbye
And saying it will all be but a lie
To me you still breathe and live
That you're gone I cannot believe
I hope you made it through
And all these rumors ain't true

When all the words have been sung in songs
When all good has been tainted by wrongs
When all those you fall for are all dating
When they are too proud to feel a thing
When you love them more instead of hating
When  every pick up line's in songs they sing
When all you've known about loving is pain
When you lost each time you played the game
When every fall wrecks you again and again
When in every conclusion you carry the blame
When every poem you wish to write is already on paper
When every sacrifice you make is easily forgotten
When the venoms of betrayal hot as paper
Is all you got each chance of loving you've gotten

When she's never kissed you albeit its long overdue
When nothing changes or everything to the dogs
When she's seldom seen like the morning dew
When she's got only flakes of affection and you logs
When nothing makes sense from the way you're treated
When she shines like the stars but leaves you in darkness
When you kept advancing when you should have retreated
Because she stole the courage from you and she's your weakness
When touching her lights you up deep inside
When the closest you get to her's to feel her breath
When It's all crystal clear It's time to decide
When the option of walking away hurts as death
When all is but a wish for you and her to hold hands
And yet you won't speak about it for nobody ****** understands

There's courage in me I just can't recall
A pride that is floating me in the sky so high
So I'm chopping my wings cause I'm trying to fall
I know a hard ground will but make me cry
I might lose my feet and it might do to crawl
Yet it does me no service if I don't try
I lose nothing, and I gain nothing at all
It might help, it might help to fall

She'll probably never know the depth of my affection
Because I too hasn't come close to its discovery
She doesn't realize how much I crave her attention
That her absence is illness and her presence recovery
She cannot tell the thing that loves her is just close
Because her favorite obsession is miles away
The reason behind her Heart's closed doors
So that desolation is her annual pay and she underscores whatever I say
She might never realize that true love was underneath her eyes
While she strained them peering beyond the horizons
Yet that far can cloak in the skin of  truth, lies
But I understand every beating Heart's got her own reasons
She might never feel the warmth of my passion
Because she trustingly and truly belongs to a better person

I used to wake up with the roosters
I used to hold my rakes and hoes
They were my morale boosters
But now who knows

I used to till my shamba beautifully neat
To **** every **** peeping above the soil
There wasn't a garden need I wouldn't meet
For even the hardest I would toil

I used to be the farmer everyone admired
Because I was a tireless strong warden
And I didn't mind being mired
By you my gorgeous little garden

I grew green pastures for my cattle
And the vegetables on which I fed
Not until that fateful battle
That changed the quiet life I led

They took you neat and left you wild
Now you lie untamed like the beasts of the savanna
Weeping like a lonely abandoned child
In the throes of battle and parents gonner

You used to be a paradise on Earth
With heavenly innocence and pure
But you no longer command trust from us
For facing you is facing manure

My papa wanted a Doctor from his son
But I wasn't one for Biology and Chemistry
Then he told me to try Engineering
But couldn't cope up with Geometry
Then he said I could try literature
But I was one with the opposing nature
Anyway I gave up the trigonometry
And in literature I met prose and poetry
It's a place where pain turns to comfort
Where I have opportunity to dirt every page
Whether I'm at peace or burdened by rage
It's somewhere I can go to evade fear
Or see my future even if it ain't clear
And even though my mood swings are rampant
It is a place where I have all the might to fight
And turn every dark corner of this world alight
My Papa in giving me the world gave me everything
A place for heart beats and mind reminiscing
For this place ain't just my Earth, It's a galaxy with her Sun

I remember the first time I said hello
The evening sky was funny blue
But the Sunset was somewhat mellow
And to tell the truth I hadn't a clue
Of what I was upto speaking like that
Thought it would exasperate
But instead you laughed from the start
While I went on, and I felt great
I've met a lot of girls in my endeavors
Yet meeting you was my favorite
Straight away you did me no favors
But yes, that was just alright
I realized you were a thing worth the strive
And winning you over after a longtime,I felt alive

You also wish it was different, said your eyes
You tried to camouflage it with *****
But then I saw it for eyes tell know lies
I saw each and every emotional bruise
You also wanted a good and happy end
Though It's high time we forgave the past
For every road and river is bound to bend
And tough people do,tough times don't last
We were a thing even we will never be again
But we wasn't good enough for each other
It's high time we learn to dance ib the rain
Rather than simply blaming the weather
Even fairy tales no longer own happy conclusions
Let's just agree such were childhood illusions

Forgetting about you, I doubt I can
It's difficult erasing memories engraved to the heart
Others will come but you'll forever be the one
Even if the end was something that badly hurt
Others will be blown my way by fate
But none of them will match the expectations
And that's something on which I'm willing to place a bet
For haven't enjoyed a thing for long like these dedications
You know exactly which song will heal
You know exactly where to touch and make me weak
You make me swallow my pride such a bitter pill
Even when I'm supposed to be cruel you make me meek
I believe you'll forever live in my head
Even if you've never blessed my cold bed

I want to wake up with you'n my arms
Everyday till I kiss the world goodbye
I wish to kiss you till I hurt my gums
And holding you so tight the reason you cry
I want you to be my breath till my death
The reason I look forward to the roller coaster
So that It's you I hold each time I hold my breath
In doldrums to ultimately be my bolster
I hope you to be the company in my honeymoon boeing
The reason I give love, faith and trust another chance
The one who'll never get up and get going
Without a reason, goodbye or even just a back glance
I want you to be the cloud that finally pours the rain
To cleanse all my tears and wash away the pain

The sky still bleeds orange at dawn
The road still meanders on
The rivers still battle the falls and rapids
The cattle home run in stumpedes
The ocean always looks constantly still
And my pride is still such a bitter pill
The Mvule still sheds her beautiful leaves
My ear still eaves, my soul still grieves
The mountain top is still a silver blur
And the missing shards linger somewhere on the floor
The cranes still sing within the rhythm of dusk
My mind is fatigued trying to accomplish the task
Of saying goodbye and forgetting about it all
Even if my sub conscious still hears your voice call
The bed still shivers and clings to the fragrance of you
And the "I" in my alphabet still really loves "U"

Rain pattered on all roofs
And Cattle clattered their hoofs
The locals gathered in groups
Cocking guns ready to shoot
Thinking that probably the brutes
Had once again returned to loot

Well, in the end I love solitude
She's always around when all walk out
I also love my principles and attitude
Friends are friends until I have doubt
I treasure nothing cause its comforting
Having the treasure of nothing to lose
And I embrace goodbye for all ends in departing
So I've learnt to embrace every wound and bruise
It's great being accustomed to melancholy
It's only fair getting used to breaking apart
For every good moment is all but a raging folly
Being sugar coated in the sheath of a sword waiting to cut
Sometimes you just have to love enough to give up
Because after dreaming all you want,you have to wake up

If only and only nature had cared enough not to place us worlds apart
Without big beautiful blue Oceans lying proudly betwixt
So that each and everyday I had you tight in my embrace as you are in my heart
My thoughts would not wonder and my emotions mixed
If there was no single mile separating two great souls
Would not be contemplating the much to enable us journey that far
If only we could find a way to break all these walls
Or if I was extraterrestrial to rocket to you like a shooting star
Every night to steal your fear and leave you courage
To stitch your wounds and heal even the scars of fate
If only you weren't so near yet so far like a mirage
Then we'd only have the length of eternity to contemplate
If only I was close enough say right across the road
The burden of living would be lighter for we'd share the load

We all have learnt to tightly seal our emotions
Because we are afraid to fall under siege of affection and to surrender
Camouflaging trying to hide in sweet scented lotions
The stench of a past we no longer want to remember

We have built great walls and made a fortress every heart
So hard so that even happiness and peace cannot find their way
But only the loneliness clambering on those walls likely to hurt
Besides the floods of despair almost washing us away

We know how to smile with a frown inside
We hide cold within the warm embrace we give
Calm lakes above yet under the visible is a current we hide
Pretending we forgot but never did we even forgive

And having learnt from ourselves that not all who are warm are caring
We choose to die with our plight without sharing

Many of them'll tell you not to be afraid
Cause they haven't seen even a leaflet
They don't know the story you've led
And all their imagination drums up is velvet

They'll tell you butterflies jump out cacoons
Because while your life's been a horror
Their's has all but been mere cartoons
So they see hope in the reality mirror

Contrary to the nightmares you've had
All they know is but banquets and roses
And blinded they can't see you're scarred
That you've seen the right path but stuck like Moses

They'll tell you life is a gamble which one wins or stumbles
They can't see the storm in your life or hear the thunder rumbles

Earth is such a crowded empty place
Filled with the nothingness of life
Clamoring to reach for the infinity in space
Soiling serenity with struggle and strife

Human hearts are vacuums filled with emotions
Running through veins and coloring the mind
Blood red with taunting unclear notions
Tainting humanity hopeless and blind

A species sailing a Titanic bound for the Ice
Battling waves along a rough boundless Sea
Trying to find another world rich in spice
A Universe beyond what its conscience can see

This race is a stifled prison in carte blanche
And it ends as it starts, like an avalanche

Walk past that door and we are done
No more going on bended knees
No more thinking you're the one
And by the time I get flashes of you I'd have dumped the keys

Walk past that door and forget I exist
Forget everything we ever fantasized
In retrospect of beauty you'll find a beast
Crazy, inhuman or human and hulk sized  

We fight everyday but I take the blame
We tear each others happiness
Soak in gasoline and set our hearts aflame
Oblivious of the consequences we act reckless

Cause we always find a way to extinguish and soothe
After all the course of true love never did run smooth

Certainly when Blade ceased to Steel
And instead became an expendable
That's when vampires began to feel
And Wesley **** non dependable

These days vampires write sad diaries
And help us learn to cope with melancholy
They are some sort of creatures in fairies
Somehow they're an inspiring melody

They no longer dance to Jackie Chan's beats
They give us a plan of how to escape grief
Showing us how to deal with defeats
And to enjoy our life long or brief

Vampires break apart ,they fight and die
Because they are us, our own created lie

I wasn't supposed to be sad or grieve
Cause you wasn't supposed to leave

I loved you from the moment we met
But our love just turned to something
The things driving me to this state
Are tendrils of memories to which I cling

We had this thing going on
That I probably should get over
I can't see where the line is drawn
Getting over you's a bullet from a revolver

It's hard for me to believe you're at ease
Life without you will never be fun
You always said we would never cease
Still hear echoes of your voice calling me ***

**** the puzzle pieces not fitting together
**** all the cacophony in my head
**** my unreliable mood like weather
**** this requiem, all my hopes are dead

**** all the expectations I had in life
**** everyone who thinks they understand
**** the back-stabbers more than the knife
**** tomorrow with each and it's every strand

**** those hoping  to change this earth
**** such crazy minds and thoughts
For all the pain this universe is worth
Tantamounts to forgetting wine and seeping tots

**** kids in ghettos watching movies about comets
**** poets trying to be shakespeare by writing Sonnets