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Sep 2014 · 393
Humantiy
pookie Sep 2014
There has always been one quote that has stuck with me through out my teenage life, it always made me think of us as a species, as people and of what as both individuals and as a species we are capable of,
and we really capable of so much,
Love,
Happiness,
Sadness,
Laughter,
Caring,
Hope,
And so much more, we as humans have the power to change the world,
And yet we don't,
And i Can say this because i don't believe in humans because i have been let down by so many,
I don't see the love or happiness or laughter not the caring or the hope,
I see people human beings walk past children getting beaten and abused,
I watch kids beat other kids for iPhones,
I see adults abuse kids for no reason other than they are drunk,

so many of these moments take my breath away and not for the right reasons, so many times I've lost my breath out of rage and anger over what we as humans have done and of what we have not done.

The quote for me that brings this together is this:

"Life is not measured by how many breaths we take but by how many breaths are taken away"

This counts for both the good and the bad moments in life, before i die i want to see and feel my breath taken away for the right reason.

What takes your breath away, both the good and the bad??
tell me what takes your breath away, give me hope give us all hope.
Sep 2014 · 507
Phantom zone
pookie Sep 2014
I don't know why but sometimes I feel as if I'm caught,
Caught between a rock and hard place,
Caught in a place where I can't escape from,
Yes there are people here but they can't hear me or see me,
I scream as loud as I can,
They just look right through me,
I try to touch them try to let them know I am here,
But my fingers just slide right through.

Am I stuck in a phantom zone?
Am I stuck in a place between the real world and death,
Why can i stop the pain that rushes through my vains,
While I'm in this place.

I'm stuck, I'm lost, I don't know what to do.
Some one anyone tell me your there make me belive I'm not stuck.
Sep 2014 · 397
Moments in time
pookie Sep 2014
Sometimes it's like the world stops turning,
Like time it's self just stops with the world,
Everything goes dark,
Everything stops,
It gets cold so cold I can't move,
Sometimes I don't know why but I treasure these moments,
Even though they cause pain,
Even though they make me yarn for things i have lost or can't have,
I treasure them because in those times I don't have I care,
All I have to do is just worry about my own survival.

Sometimes I wish I didn't have to survive,
Just let time take my breath away so I don't have to breath anymore.
Aug 2014 · 511
Wondering
pookie Aug 2014
Sometimes i wonder,
wonder at all the mazing sights,
sounds,
smells,
and all the amazing people,
friends,
family,

Sometimes i wonder,
wonder at everything and nothing,

i wonder about emotions,
what are they,
why do we feel,
why do we not feel,

you see i have wondered today about a lot of things,
people,
the world,
and feelings.

Why, well because i hurt,
and when i hurt i think,
think about the good and for some reason being a pessimist,
how the good things seems to miss me by,

you see one feeling i don't understand and i don't think anyone understands is,
Love,
you see twice i have fallen head of heels in love,
and twice now i have fallen down because of it,
in pain and sorrow and disbelief,

right now i am in denial i am sure,
because i can't believe its happened agin.

and honestly i don't want to believe in love,
is if love gets you this.

but was it love, or was a it a desire to feel some one close both physically and emotionally,
desire and love are different,
but feel the same.

Maybe I'm just too young to understand or maybe I'm just not optimistic.

just a thought after being left again.
Aug 2014 · 438
Where have you gone
pookie Aug 2014
Where have you gone,
Darling please tell me,
Give me a clue so I may at least search for you,
Where have you gone,
My love younhave disappeared,
You have left a gaping hole in my chest,
I have you my heart and you have gone,
Taking everything with you.

I have you everything, everything I had left to give.
Darling.
Where have you gone.
Aug 2014 · 684
Release The Fear.
pookie Aug 2014
Release the Fear,
Release the apprehension,
The False Starts,
And The False Ends,

Release the Shaking of your hands,
The racking of your chest as you heave tears down your face,

Release all that you hold inside,
Release the Pain,
Release the Sadness,

Release it All,
Open yourself to the new,
And Let go of the Old,

Believe in yourself and What you can do,

Because believe me when i say this,
"You Are Not Alone, Not Alone With Your Fears, Your Sadness, Your Pain"
Believe me because i know what it feels like.

To hold on to the fear,
To hold onto that pain,
That sadness,

To Cling To it.

But Now With Me.

Let it Go,
Release your hold on it.

Be Free,
Be Yourself and not what your Told to Be.
Release it all because in the end when you don't, you get stuck on what should have been and what could have been, not on what is and what you can make happen.

Believe in yourself.......
Aug 2014 · 1.3k
An Idea
pookie Aug 2014
No Army,
Can Stop An Idea,

No Bullet,
Can Stop An Idea,

No One Can Stop An Idea,
Why, Why,

Because an idea is not a person,
it is not a thing that can be shot,
or burned,
or tortured.

No.
An Idea Is A Belief.
It Is a Catalyst.
It Is everything and nothing at all at once.

An idea can be created by one person,
but shared and given power by all.

Thus....

No Army
Can Stop An Idea.
just a thought just an idea
Jul 2014 · 665
Fuck You
pookie Jul 2014
*******,
who says i have to follow what you say,
**** that,
you words were poison,
your words are lies,
**** the times when you manhandle me,
**** the times you threaten,

next time you look into my eyes with rage and hatred remember,
that i was born with that too,
from you.
Just Angry
Jul 2014 · 932
I Wish.
pookie Jul 2014
Sometimes i wish life could be easier:

i wish that i could live in a cabin in the moutons of Austria,
where snow blocks all the roads,

and the only company i have are deer and birds maybe the odd bear,
i wish for peace and tranquility,
for a time where everything just stops moving so fast.

i wish for a place where even the most mundane jobs take hours,
like chopping wood for the stove,
hunting for food,
foraging for sweet berries,
making everything yourself,

i wish for a time where i can just be at rest and not worry about coming back to this life that i live.
Jul 2014 · 4.0k
Just listen
pookie Jul 2014
Go out side and sit down,
Leave everything inside,
Your phone,
Your laptop,
Everything,
Just sit outside and listen,

Listen to the world,
Just listen.

And maybe just maybe you see peace.
Jul 2014 · 1.2k
Peace never lasts long.
pookie Jul 2014
Stars above my head,
Gently caress of wind on my face,
The sound of song birds in the distance,
The smell of wild flowers in the meadows below me,

O life how you can be so beautiful.
O life how you can tempt me to be at peace.

Tall moutains around me tall enought to have snow caps resting on top of them,

Forests so lush with life even the deafest ears can here the songs of forest life,

O life you, you tease me with these sweets.

Even as I stand here in this meadow of flowers dressed in moonlight i can not stem this feeling of unease,

It's the knowing that at some point this will end this peace.

Because peace never lasts long.
Jul 2014 · 1.3k
Anger and hate
pookie Jul 2014
The rolling sound if thunder,
That signifys hate and anger in ones mind,
Has come to pass today in mine,

While from time to time I let it pass today I let it go no hiding back.

That rolling sound turned to lightning,
Bright quick painful,
Sometimes it can create something utterly beautiful like glass made from struck sand,
And others the charred remains of a tree made dead.

I feel empty once again,
No life,
No love,
No laughter.

Just a faint flash of lightning.
Jul 2014 · 4.3k
Darkness.
pookie Jul 2014
Darkness seeps in into,
Every crack,
Every crevice,
Darkness is like water and air,
It's everywhere ever  where this is light,
There is also darkness.

Darkness is truth,
Darkness is the friend that is always there,
Darkness knows your secrets,
Darkness knows your sorrows,

Darkness is and always will be that frotten thing that seeps out and into ever crack and crevice when we least
Expect it.
Sitting in silence just thinking about all manner if things and realised just how dark it had gotten and not
Just in my room.
Jul 2014 · 289
Silence
pookie Jul 2014
Silence is the lock that requires no key,
Silence is the friend that no one wants,
Silence is the loudest sound that we hear,

Silence is nothing yet everything.
Thoughts about sitting in silence
Jul 2014 · 489
Why and why.
pookie Jul 2014
What is the question?
That no one knows,
What is the answer?
That no one can give,

Why were we made to live, love and cry?
Why?
Just a few question.
Jun 2014 · 772
Inspired By Beauty
pookie Jun 2014
After all these years,
Here we are still following the sunrise,
Watching where it leads,
And never where it ends,
Mesmerised by its colours,
And the sounds surrounding it,

After all these years we still don't understand,
That we will never understand the earth and sun,
That it was never meant to be understood,
But to be Admired and looked at,
To see the Beauty,
And to have hope ignited in our hearts and souls.

sometimes we think to much,
try to understand what was never meant to be understood,
try to explain what needs not explaining,
we never truly stop and see.

See the Beauty and Be Inspired.
not my best but not my worsed, woke up this morning and just had to stop my self and just look
Jun 2014 · 1.7k
Believe
pookie Jun 2014
Lay down and dream,
Open your eyes and make your dreams a reality,
Take that step forward,
And keep on going.

Lay down and dream,
Open your eyes and believe,
Believe in the future and what is to come.

Believe in dreams.
Believe in yourself.
Believe in your future.

Lay down and dream.
Wake up and smile.
Knowing you are taking that first step.
Knowing you will get there, where ever there is.
Smile knowing you believe.
Jun 2014 · 739
Just A Laugh
pookie Jun 2014
one text,
one sentence,
a couple of words strung together,
meant to ease the pain,

And Yet..

they don't,
they change the way i think,
take away the love i once had for you,
to understand i was nothing more,
than a.
Good Laugh
is just painful.

being a mistake was easy to deal with,
but just being a laugh in your words,
is worse.
what was one love, is now just a faint memory, a Laugh thats its, Danm i thought i was more than that for you.
Jun 2014 · 5.5k
Worry
pookie Jun 2014
I worry all the time,
Not for what I've done or did or even may of done,
But for the people I care about,
When someone says don't worry Lu,
I worry even more,

It's like it's an in built programme that dosnt turn off or down it's set on constant,

And really for me if I worry about you,
It means I care,
It may be annoying but hell,
It's better than me
Not Being,
There.
I worry too much I think but I just can't turn it off
Jun 2014 · 1.1k
A Mistake
pookie Jun 2014
**** it hurts when you think you love someone,
And find out they don't love you that hurts,
But that's life,
We go through moments of
Passion and love and lust,
And yes these are good and bad.

And then you find that one person,
You be with them,
And you both say it's forever,
Then it breaks apart,
And you find out,
From the new person there with,
That you were a mistake,

A big ******* mistake,
That hurts,
That cuts deeper than anything,
The fact they can't say it to your face is like rubbing it in.

A big ******* mistake
This happened to me, it's ******* worse than anything I've felt before
pookie Jun 2014
"Whiskey please" I ask the bar man I sit down,
I gulp it down"another",
I look at the glass reconsider my options and say" actually
Give me the bottle",

I try to drown my sorrows,
Drown out the noise,
Drown out everything,
Drip,
Drip,
Drip,
There goes the bottle and yet here I am,

Still sat here,
With an empty glass.
Jun 2014 · 2.4k
Rain
pookie Jun 2014
Cold,
Wet,
Rememberance,
Flowing,
Silence,
Deafaning.

Rain,
Everything we need and don't,
Good and bad,
Memories we want to remember but also ones we want to forget.
May 2014 · 1.0k
Boom
pookie May 2014
Boom,
Emotional explosion,
HAHA too ******* right,
****** up right,
Just sat here steaming,
Boiling to a point of losing control,
Boom Explosion.

Boom,
Anger,
Rage,
Agression,
Its all there just under my skin,

now its raising,
up,
up,
up,
it comes,

its coming haha,
nothing i can do now,
better to just let it go.

this is what happens,
with no sleep and just nightmares,
this is what happens,
when you have nothing and no one.

this is it.
its time.

Explode,
implode,
destruction,
BOOM

theres nothing left.
no breaks,
no control.
a mish mash of emotions, I'm sick of holding in and only showing the mask that people want to see.
pookie May 2014
You tell me to talk to you,
Tell you I'm when I'm not doing great,
But when I do your not there,
You never replay,
You never read it,
Never pick up,
Your always somewhere else when it matters,

They all say it "talk to me I'm here for you I promise",
But no one is there when it truly matters,
No one listens,
It's like talking to brick wall,
Hard,
Emotionless,
Full of cracks,

Yes no ones perfect but when you make a promise,
Don't go back on it.
Who ever reads this and I know you don't ask just leave it sometimes the best medicine is to do nothing so don't go there don't ask, don't tell me it will be okay because it won't
May 2014 · 554
Taken
pookie May 2014
A full moon,
That's what I see tonight as I wake,
In cold sweats from bone chilling nightmares,
Shadows
Jump out at me,


I wake,
Cold,
In tears,
I think to myself,
There's nothing left nothing,
Darkness,
Sadness,
Sorrow,

My nightmares plague my nights,
Chase my dreams away,
Take away my sanity,
Replace it with depression and sadness,

There is nothing left,
Happiness taken,
Love taken.

All
Because of these
Nightmares
An experiment from waking up from one of my nightmares.
pookie May 2014
Two lovers lost in a world of pain,
One says goodby while the other,
Begs,
Pleads,
And cry's,
For the other to stay.

But no they leave his heart splits in two,
Tears from her eyes,
Tears in his.

They split apart staring after each other,
Lost forever is there,
Love

Forever lost and never found.
Listening to a great big world amazing band but makes me remember that something's are lost forever.
May 2014 · 1.1k
Miss you already
pookie May 2014
Tonight is gonna be difficult, I'm in Leeds and in a Hotel I tell a very old friend that I'm on town she comes to meet me we talk and talk, all the way back to my Hotel, time flys I thought to my self yet she was still smiling at me and Danm that smile it could melt anyone's heart, I let her in she puts her bag down and turns round " so you've been alone without anyone for how long" I'm lost for words didn't know what to say I swear I blushed, she smiles and takes
My hands and says "not tonight".

That was last nigh never got a chance to post it, happy and bad memories,
She made me
Smile and I get we both slept after and she woke with a smile that I've never seen on her face before.

I'm going to miss her.
Bit insinuating but needed it out she was a friend a long long time ago funny how relationships change
May 2014 · 1.2k
I miss you.
pookie May 2014
I miss you more than you know,
It brings tears to my eyes when it remember what we used to do,
What we used to be like,

I miss you more than you know,
You plague my dreams both at night and during the day,
I dream of you it's what gets me through.

Danm I miss you,
Every wall I see your face plastered on it,
Every blast of wind is like your breath on my neck,
Goosebumps raise every Danm time.

I miss you so ******* much.

And there's nothing I can do.

One day I'll see you again hopefully we will both be happy.
I miss you shnufflepuff.
May 2014 · 565
The Flow of Life
pookie May 2014
little by little,
bit by bit,
slowly it all grinds down in the end,
like a river down hill,
it starts on top but over the years,
it erodes down and down till there is a gaping scar in the land,

little by little,
bit by bit,
its all the same really,
the ware and tear of life,
tbh,
I'm like the earth below the river,

my skin the grass,
my muscles the the dirt,
my bones the stones,
the ware of life is just going through me,
and like the earth it erodes through me,
and like the earth i give way to the wight of the water,
the scars are there old and new,

little by little,
bit by bit,
slowly I'm eroding away,
soon there will be nothing left.

and i will be glad for it.
May 2014 · 791
Come and Get Me
pookie May 2014
come and get me,
you know you want to,
you stand there and look at me,
staring putting all your hatred in it,
so why do you grow a pair,

come and get me,
you say you will often enough,
whats are words if there is no action behind them,

come and get me you *******,
stop antagonising me,
learn the way of this world and sort your problems out.

come and get me.
really ******* at the moment, having so many arguments with my family and people i know lately they all shout and scream, but they never solve the problem, and a lot of them think shouting at me is gonna make me calm it just ****** me off.
May 2014 · 3.9k
Come rain or shine
pookie May 2014
It dosnt matter really what the weather dose,
Dosnt matter what's in the way,
Who or what stands in front of me it dosnt matter,
Becuase if you call I will come
For you,
Always,

So come rain or shine,
I'll be there,
To hold your hand,
To hold you when your sad,
To wipe away yours tears,

It dosnt matter the distance,
The problems or the past,
When you call,
I'll be there at your side,
Come rain or shine.

All you have to do is call.
And I'll be there.
It's hard to make someone believe that but when you do it's worth it
May 2014 · 592
Thinking hurts
pookie May 2014
I grow wary of thinking,
I laugh when I chide my self,
"Now now carful you think hard enough it will hurt",
Then I laugh to my self and think again,

Sometimes of nothing other times it's of wild winters and summers full of laughter and love,

But even more so now I think of what it would be like,
To have someone close,
To hold,
To kiss,
To not have to think,

I chide my self more now than ever before for I think to much.
But thinking and day dreaming is the only time i achieve what I want, what misery.
Apr 2014 · 953
Where is she
pookie Apr 2014
I need you, why do I need,
I'm at a loss as to why I dispear so much,
My heart aches,
My eyes shed tears like a dam that has broken,
My soul is a deep dark pit of dispear,

And yet you are not here,
You are not there,
I can't find you,
I need you,
I am weak and you are strong,

Where are you,
I beg O I beg,
Where are you.
I am lost and I can't find her I need her now more than ever and yet she is not here.
Apr 2014 · 6.5k
Life's a blur
pookie Apr 2014
The blur of life,
It's quick,
It's silent in reality,

I sit and watch as the people go by,
Watch as people say hello and good bye,
Watch as they shed tears as they watch the other leave,

The blur of life,
It's quick,
It's silent in reality,

As I sit i see,
See the happiness,
See the joy in a young boys face as his mother buys him a ice cream,
And yet watch an old man cry Becauaes he rembered when his mum did the same for him,

Life is blur,
We never truly know when it will end,
Or what we will see in a day,
It's all a blur and when we sit,
We see it for what it is quick,
And in reality it's silent.

Don't let life pass you by, smile at a stranger, make a child laugh,
Help an old
Women across the road.

Because life is a blur and you never know when the end will come.
Apr 2014 · 807
Open your eyes
pookie Apr 2014
Open yours eyes please,
Open them to the new day,
Open yours and see the sun rise,
Let it wash away your nightmares my dear,
Open your eyes and let me take your hands,
Let me help you up,
Open your hands to mine so I can help stand my dear,

Let me take you to all the places you wanted to see,
Open your eyes and see that I will do that for you,
Let me give you all the things that you need,
To surprise you with roses and tickets to Unknow destinations,

Planes to exotic places,
Breakfast in different cites,
Memories scattered over the world,

Open your eyes darling,
Open your hands,
Take my hands and take the first step,
In this adventure,
That we call life.
Apr 2014 · 622
Before I'm gone
pookie Apr 2014
Too bad you don't talk,
Too bad you don't care,
That you can't give a ****,
Ha if only you'd open your eyes and see,
See the truth,
You sit there high and mighty shouting at me,
Like a giant ******* thunderstorm,
And for what so you can clear your air,
Open your eyes and see the truth,
See me for what I am and not what your told,

I'm here for you,
Always for you,
Through the thunderstorms,
Through everything,
Open your eyes.

Before it's to late,
Before I'm gone.
I wish you would see, stop listening to all of them and live your life. Please.
Apr 2014 · 1.8k
I wish upon a star.
pookie Apr 2014
I wish upon a star,
To brighten my day and sweeten my dreams,
I wish upon a star,
To awaken me every morning to a better day,
I wish upon a star,
To take away all the pain in this world,
I wish upon a star,
To heal all this illness and death,
I wish upon a star,
But that wish never comes true.

No matter how big or how small it never comes true,
My day Is never sweet nor bright and never is the pain gone or the illness and death healed.
Never dose it come true for wishes do not work nor do miracles.

I still wish in the vain hope that one day someone's wish comes true, no matter how big or how small we all deserve a wish or two.
pookie Mar 2014
secrets,
mysteries,
dishonesty,
misleading,
illusions,

all of this words mean a lot to me,
i've used all of them,
had them used on me,
but most of all i understand them,

understanding is the most important,
because its not just about seeing when they have been used,
but how to use them to protect yourself,
protect your heart and mind,
your soul and your life,

there will be times when you need to mislead people so you are safe,
times when you need to keep secrets so others are not hurt,
but also when to tell a secret or break one open,

but understanding is more than that,
its about seeing that no matter what you do,
it will be painful,
it will make you cold inside,
and it will change you.

secrets,
mysteries,
dishonesty,
misleading,
illusions,

all­ of this are important,
to see,
to use,
to understand.

life is hard, life is tough, secrets hurt but they also protect, mysteries surround every person we have to break and untangle them, dishonesty is hard and nasty but is needed in a world where every one leads us astray, misleading is every where we need to understand how to find the right path, and finally illusions are simple yet complex we use them to hide our pain but we get hurt by the through out our life.

for us to live,
to see,
to be free,
we need to understand,
to be set free.
i've been hurt by all of these words at some point and yes i've used them.

for us to be truly free to live our lives we have to understand them.
Mar 2014 · 336
Lost forever.
pookie Mar 2014
Lost in a never ending spiral,
A rabbit hole with no end,
Spinning out of control,
No end,
Just falling firths and deeper into madness,
Going,
Going,
And gone,

Lost forever.
My dreams and nightmares, my love and sorrow, my hopes and wishes.

This short poem is more than just words for me at the momeant I am lost and am falling and I believe I will still fall further with no end.
Mar 2014 · 407
A momeant of joy
pookie Mar 2014
A moment of joy,
A spark of something more,
A bolt of happiness,

But then the sudden realisation,
The pain returns,
The sorrow of what could have been,
The what could haves,
The shoulds,

That momeant of joy,
Turns to a life time of sadness.
Mar 2014 · 551
Forgetting
pookie Mar 2014
The need to forget,
Is like an addiction,
An unbelievable pain,
There's nothing like it,

I need it gone,
I need to forget it all,
I want it to become the mist from the morning,
The smoke from a cigarette disappearing Ito the sky,
Like magic abracadabra and it's gone,

I need it all gone,
Like feeling the high of nicotine,
The rush of being free,
Even if it is just for a few seconds,
To become disembodied and let it all float away,

The need to forget,
Is like an addiction,
One that I can never fulfil.
Feb 2014 · 1.7k
Staying calm
pookie Feb 2014
People tell me to calm down,
Calm down getting angry won't help,
Calm down the tears arnt gonna bring her back,
Calm down getting frustrated won't get it done,

What if I don't want to calm down,
What if I want to let go of calm,
See where it takes me,
Calm calm down for what,
For pain,
Loss,
Sadness,
Calm down for what,

It's like everyone says calm down,
Like it's magic and will make it all better,
When I calm down it dosnt make it better,
It makes it worse makes me think of all the things,
That I did wrong,
Of all the bad memories,
Of all the bad times,

What if letting to of calm,
Means I can be free,
Free to live life like I should,

Because to me to stay calm,
Is to put your self in prison,
A prison made by everyone else,

Staying calm is not what it seems.
Jan 2014 · 1.2k
Nightmares
pookie Jan 2014
This isn't really a poem at all this is what i go through every night.

im standing on a long narrow path, i can feel the cobbles underneath my feet, they are uneven and cold to the touch. I know thats its night time but there is no moon and no stars, just black, dark and cold. I start to move forward on the cobbled street but as i move forward i hear a scarping sound behind me i turn round slowly my whole body shaking cold sweat running down my skin, what i see frightens me, all i see is a face and a dark shadow covered body, the face is moving darkness tendrils of shadows moving across his face, he has eyes like burning embers i can almost see the smoke escaping his eyes, he has horns dark black like a rams horns poking through his darkness, he starts to laugh and when i see his mouth its full of the faces of people i know but they are on fire screaming the skin melting off there bones the arms and hands outstretched reaching for help but there is none there, i'm stuck just standing there i can move i cant run away as he turns his eyes on me boring into my soul seeing me for who i am and ripping my memories apart bring up the ones i buried he laugh he's enjoying it,  he moves forward grasping me with his hands the tendrils of shadows holding me still i cant breath i cant move, he moves closer to me his hands grow claws sharp as razors he digs them into me i feel be flesh tear i scream but he dosn't stop he just laughs at me saying to me that i'm pathetic, worthless, he digs further with his claws i now feel my blood pumping down my arms down my legs i cant stop it i can't move, he just laughs at me goading me i scream more and more till my throat cracks and nothing comes out, he looks at me and just drops me, i get up he looks at me and smiles i run as fast as i can running for my life, i turn back to and see hundred of eyes like his each one holding a painful memory of mine reminding me of it pulling at me, i run but they are always behind me they all laugh and again i see the people i know in pain and i cant do anything, i keep running my lungs burn my legs feel like dead wights but i don't stop i keep going one foot in front of the other, the the cobbles fall away and fall through the air and hit hard flat ground i look up but its just darkness i know i'm in a tunnel i can feel it sense it i stop running i take a deep breath but then i feel my skin tear all along my back and he's there smiling again i run the blood running freely down my back now, as i'm running i hear a sound one that made me stop from fear a scream that chilled my soul and rattle my bones so high pitched it hurt me to listen, but it didn't stop i carried on i felt my ear drums burst and blood dribble down my neck from it, i fall too my knees clutching my head to stop the sound stop the pain, as soon as my knees hit the floor theres a thunderclap and the walls and celling crack, the walls fall on me cracking my bones the tear through my skin my muscles rip and my vain's burst i can only feel pain the celling collapses trapping me my intestines rupture my lungs pop, i can feel it all happening, i scream for help but no ones there, i scream till my throat bleeds but no one hears me, i can see them  the demons laughing, i can see the people who i thought would helping standing on top of where i'm buried they do not notice they just walk away. i start to grow cold and weak my eyes are shutting the last of my strength escapes me and then as i'm about to die.

i wake up.


This happens every night.
i just needed to write it down get it out of my head but i know that tonight ill still have that nightmare.
Jan 2014 · 472
Burning bright
pookie Jan 2014
A whisp of smoke,
A smidgen of mist,
And a dusten of rain,
Nothing more nothing less,
No sun, no moon,
No two lovers gazing at the stars,
Just the cold empty space,
The tendrils of mist sweeping over the hills,
The smoke moving in front of the fire,
Hiding the angry red flames of hate,
The rain so desperately trying to stop,
The fire,
But it will not stop because YOU,
stoked its flames, you fed its fuel,
But then you left, left it to die,
To wither and lose its heat,
Left it to become cold as night,
But then you expect it to be there for you,
When you left,
Expect it to keep you warm,

A whisp of smoke,
A smidgen of mist,
And a dusten of rain,
All it would have taken was one word,
But you refuse to see what you did,
Refuse to see what you made,
Happen,
So I will not stop burning,
I will not stop until you,
See.

I will burn everything to the ground just to make you see me once again.
Jan 2014 · 505
Forever in love with you
pookie Jan 2014
Little by little,
The passion fades,
The love falls away,
And little by little,
My soul shrivels,

You say that you love me,
But do you,
So you really love me,
Or do you say it just,
To appease me,

You said that you would be there forever,
But will you,
No you won't because really you don't want me to stay,
You want him,
And him alone,
I'm just a back up plan of a back up plan,

But yet here I am even when your love fades away,
And your passion has all but disappeared,
Mine only expands,
And my love grows stronger,

For although I am only third best,
I am still here for you shnufflepuff,
My love my be blind love and devotion,
But it is unconditional love,

Forever in love with you.
Signed

Pookie.
The girl this is for will never read it, nor will she hear it.
But yet I'll still pour my heart out to her all the same.

A fools hope but hope all the same
Jan 2014 · 662
smoke and mirrors
pookie Jan 2014
its easy to hide,
to not show your self,
its easy to just disappear,
its easy to stop texting stop calling,
stop all communication,

**** like magic,
gone with out a trace,
its easy,
a bit of smoke there,
a few mirrors here,
and i'm invisible,
gone to the naked eyes of everyone,
all those people who want to pry at the open wounds,

so here i go again spreading the smoke and placing the mirrors,
making it so that all the people who want to hurt,
who want to pry,
who want to rip apart everything in there path,

so with a magic word,
or a swish of a wand,
im gone,
like smoke and mirrors,

im just the smoke that everyone will ignore,
dissipating in the air.
Jan 2014 · 407
Too heavy
pookie Jan 2014
My eyes to heavy to stay open,
My arms to heavy to lift,
My legs to heavy to move,

Everything is just to much,
Everything is to heavy,
Everything is too much,

I'm just so tired,
Tired of trying,
Tired if trying move something that won't move,

It's just to heavy,
It's just to much.
Jan 2014 · 948
Kick drum of my heart
pookie Jan 2014
A slow rhythm,
A beat,
Slow steady,
Beat after beat,
A pulse of life and death,
Beat after beat,

Like rain falling from the sky,
The drops fall repeatedly,
Over and over,
Beat after beat,
It's never ending,
It never stops,
There are no breaks in this storm,

The storm is life,
The rain drops are my heart beats,
The lighting and thunder my nightmares,
The cold is how I feel,

The beat of my heart keeps going no matter what,
No matter how much I want the cold to take,
No matter how much I want the rain to drown me,
No matter how hard I try the beat is still there,
All be it weaker every day,

The steady rhythm,
The beat
Beat
Beat.
I wish it were so easy sometimes, poetry doesn't do it justice there are no words to describe the feeling of longing, weather that's for love of for death.
Jan 2014 · 599
Treading water
pookie Jan 2014
I don't know what to say anymore,
I don't know what to think anymore,
I don't know what to do anymore,

My mind,
My body,
My heart,
My soul,
Do not know what to do anymore,

Time has just stopped,
It's like I'm just treading water,
I'm not moving,
Not going any where,
Just trying to keep myself afloat,

I don't know when I keep treading water,
Everyday my legs and arms get weaker,
The water keeps on getting deeper and deeper,
My body gives in,
I don't know why,
Why is it that I survive,

I don't know what to do,
What to think or feel,
I don't know which way to go,

I can't take it much longer,
It won't be long before my head goes under the water,
And I won't tread water anymore.
Jan 2014 · 448
Tears from the sky
pookie Jan 2014
I don't know why,
But when I lay here watching the rain fall,
I remember all the pain,
The sorrow and sadness,
It's like each raindrop,
Is like tear shed by the sky,

It's like the world is crying for all of us,
See our sadness each day and night,
Like it holds it in for as long as it can,
But like tonight the sky cries,
And shows us that it sees our pain,

And I sit here and see in those tears my memories and sadness,
And like the sky I hold it in,
But then I cry and let it out,
Because I can't hold it in anymore,

My tears like the rain drops,
Dropping and hitting the floor,
With no sympathy,
With no one there to wipe them away,

But sky gives us one thing when it cries,
And that's a new start,
It washes away the tear tracks,
And washes away our actions,

The sky sees out pain and when it rains it rains for us,
Showing us that it sees,
And It knows our pain,

So let it rain and wash away out tear tracks,
And give us a new start.
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