The silence is Interactive

          Intrusive disappears

           Once now infinite
                 The Truth
          Starts to come clear

           Without hesitation
                  Her heart,
                Majestically
                Tramposed

Without another nation
No lack of ques Or toes
She follows well

Hola
Se la vie
Goodbye resend
The same lines again and again
The pain runs faster
Inside my head meeting me again
You're open to anything
Right?

Her relinquished love
Grew fire
It began
To drench
Her very core

This denial
Had finally
Came to an end

Lost
Not loved
Bruised
Not enough

Perspective

Okay
getting better
Things look up
A little lighter

I'm hopeless
Looking over
The wishing well
Full of gold coins

I throw one in daily
Never knowing
What else craving
To summon for

You're always it

So on days
I'm lost
Short of fuse
I grab my bucket
And use

Now not realizing
The coins have flowed
Outside of brick walls
Unto my doorstep

I am hopeless
Forever now
Forever will be

Be human to yourself

I spend all my days
Wanting and forgetting you
Leaving and breathing you

The absenent taste
Burns bitter
Like ashes
All around me
My teeth grin
With pain

My own absence
Ignores me
Then wakes
Me alive
Just to come
Back down

Why must I
Ever come down

When you are
My bed
Hurried dry dying
To become a
Strawberry stain
Rearranged

I craved
You in ways
My body
Never knew
Possible

Overacheiving
Overdose

Looking for
A haunting high

Set fire
To night drawn
Skies

In colors
So bright
My tongue
Burst
With electricity

And all truth
Spilled on top
Of me

Like a mountain
Of fantasies

You came and
Saved me

I feel like a destroyer
A dominant domain
Under siege
Attacked
On the left side of my brain

I feel words being
Taken from my soul
And lifted into another plane

I feel castrated
While menstrated
Drops of blood
Pour out of me again

I feel nothing

I feel creative scars
Trying to mend
Trying to help
But I won't let them in

I'm scared I won't be able
To block all the negative out
Which is intrusive and invasive
And never seems to stop

I feel soulful
Joyus
Loved
Alive

Until
The bread crumbles
In to rye
And I cry

Then I'll heal
Then this pain
Won't penetrate
My atmosphere

My heart
Has been lost
Kept under wraps
If softened
Then what happens next

If looked at
What will I find
Deepened rivers
Opened wide

Gushing
Rushing
She knows who she is

Understood
Misspoken
The real is here again
I must end

If our nature
is to go beyond,
how do we not
do that without
being presently
drawn

Made in your face
Or drawn over a thin
White lie
I mean line
Made out of paper
You posted it
Didn't you

Who are you
Where do you live
Inside a crib
You once slept in
No home goes unnoticed
To us kinds

We live in imagination
BEyOND the bright fillip stars
Where comfort and knowing are

We live to follow you
And quarter just for a go about
What you imagine life really is

It's you
It's all inside of you
Your soul stretched a thousand lands
Before finding you
And reaching into
Your afterlife care

It sput out ashes upon
Your bed
And told you
Please do not take
These off your sheets
One day you will kneel
I'm what yiure now doing
Only to look up
To a brighter pool
Of hopefully zooms of light
Inhabited by mother
And father time

Just joking they don't exist here
Here is parallel to any know being
Where the fish comb
Through your vessels
And hats race thru your mind
And hurddles of black sea
Trunks of ancient old trees
Soon devour
Fastly
Intrigued
By YOU
Little I'm
Nobody pays attention to me you
We,are interested in you

But why?
I don't like the attention
Please don't look at me
It makes me really
Creepy and weird
And mad and rages
Like scavengers eating
At my brain

Please,see it a different way
You are us
We birthed you from the Stars
We love your light
We never hate
You
When you feel
Low or have a hard time
We encourage you in
Whispers light
Through this species
I found your aunt
Delilah and uncle Sam

aha I thoubut so
They are mine

And the dark ones
I carry like backpacks
Of rocks
Never to lift
With each,thought

Erasing won't,help
They've already
Bought space
In my mind
And they live in my bed
And eat,the ashes
Before I have tome,
To descend into the sky
Upside down they have
Me
Curling my toes
Where,the duck are,my toes anyway
It's man eats shot all day
Kind of love,that they celebrate

To my disguise
You,can eat cake and raindrops
Will soon taste like healing
And your insationable appetite
For life,will soon
Turn on

Is it perspective
Can or do I still have you've,them
For morning noon and night
Or can I take a flight
Or lay down a Lahore the help do I get rid of them all

Well never tell
That's where you'll
Find us
That's where we dwell
In the back of my mind

Enter stage right
Exit night
Enter light
Take,my hand
OFF TO NEVER NEVER LAND

Perspective is everything!!

I liked it better
When we fought
Then I could get attention
Then you'd call me out

Dear sweet attention
What's my name
Slap me
Berate me
Carmalize me instead

Make me pretty
Attention will follow
Many beds

Till I collapse underneath
My pillow instead
And crawl to walk
And walk I shall stay

Firm and steady
Not wishing I was dead
Past washed
Past watched
Not to show up
But to feel me
leave my IMPRINT

Infinite is Sun
Pure power
Infinite is it's solar kenisis
Born of passion and fire
Infinite is Moon
Blue bliss
Infinite are the oceans
It pulls

Divide and cease yourself
From your outercore
Break open in habbit
Pour
    Pour
        Pour
Liquid gold
Of soliloquy
Eulogies
Rebirth and bathe
In esctasy

You have to let it go
Lose control
Unthink
Penetrate
Lockness gone

The bizzare twist
Ironic plots
Synchronisations sake
Alive

Feel fuel burning
From fingertips light
Inhaling conscience
Desires

Center points
Plotting x and z
On scalic demeans

Concentrate
On the higher
Things

Ploring through
Time zonic tonic
Discussion closed

Rebirth
Reaknowledge
Stories told

Simple and divine
Asking heiresses
Jabbing hearts

Reliquient unheard of
Fortunes found
For hours on end

She will
Be mine

Can I live
Inside of you
Can I taste
What you're made of

Can I wander
Around inside
Of you
For days on end

Can I tap
All the doors
To open
The ones
Deepest

Can I make
You crumble
And eat
What falls

When the
world grew
out of focus,
she was home.

I like my Dark
Especially when it's
On Fire

Ice is water
And too smooth
For my satisfaction

I don't need a breeze
Or a tree
Or to find me

I'm okay with me
And accept all of my
Flaws behavior
And the abscence
Of my positivity

I can create in the dark
With spells and bountiful PEACE

Sometimes I feel alone
with only my stare
staring back at me
Where no one else can bother me
This is where I long to be

Transparency
Enlightenment high
Soon comes inside
Finds me alive

Nibbling at its feet
He raises my chin
Tells me to
Come with him

Collects my broken
Tea cups
And shows me
The beauty within

Where all my dreams
Still exist
And memory unfolds
As tales are told

Outside the fires ring
Inside a quiet library
I must seem to be
As you look back at me

Closing off
What use to be
Letting down walls
Letting passion bleed
Outside in

Over and over again
Repetitious halos
Swarm my empire

Golden light
Sparks the inner fire
Souls speak
Always speak
To me
From afar

Where will
We go next

The tides
Overroll me
Your breath
Sabatoges your leaks
Your oars aren't moving
You eyes keep fluttering

The fireflies
Under your tongue
Are escaping

Yearning desperately
For forgiveness
From intrusive abuse

Save me!

I would follow the moon
As close as id go
Your voice echoed
Inside
We had coversations
Each and every night
I prayed To you
Like a God
That created
The very birth
Of my soul
You escaped me
You let go
Now I long for you
I let myself search
Beyond this cloud
Of doo
Is a beautiful earth
Waiting to unravel
Inside my twisted
Blooming
Everescent light

Drowning in nature
Pure and light

It is a calling
It is passion
That cures US

Don't tell myself
You are the reason
Don't tell myself
There is another way out
Don't tell you
To put this into reason
Or to try and work it out
Want to work it out all on my own
Because the exceeding yet
Tortures pleasures
I get from the
Guilt of having you as my sin
Right or wrong
It won't go away
A pain I long to forget
To take it away

To lick the salt clean
To unearth me from
These ashes
I've made seen

To recoup my backbone
And repent my sin's
To forgo what
Could have been
And make me
Whole again

Hounds curl up against my throat
Like a sinking anchor
Going under!?
He cares again to whisper

Silent sweet satanic hummmms
None like other ones
None like ever before

He wrestles me down
Bellowing screams inside my
Belly

Eyes a flutter
Body transcendent
The fear too highly grounded
To ever lift up to another
As I had before

Come sit beside
The open door
Devilish curiousity
Takes over me
As it had
Many moons before

Wondering
Giving
Impatiently ashamed
Too scared
Curiosity core

Release the inner beast
Drums hummms of ****** beginnings
into the wild nature of the earth

Calling you down
Below your very own surface
A small light
You will always hold
To the sounds
Of wanting more

Religious frustrations
A hideaway oasis

Laughter unknowing
Face unshowing

I'm tired of "understudying myself"
  
(The just in case syndrome, the worry, the not good enough,the anticipation of failure has got to go.)

Its time for me to be the Star

I didn't have time
to hit snooze
I was enthused
by my muse
Her name is
  POETRY

She crawls and beats
rhytms out my mouthpiece
It vibrates with such
a chase and win
with the narrative
of my pen

Gravity cushions
as I let
my body flow

I stand still
inside a quantum physics
Parallel universe
Just Me and The Verse

I just need some
Different points of views

Sometimes the galaxies
Are on my shoes

Fitting perfectly
Into this sky of hues

Like im navigating winds
With the palm of my hands

Bare and free
Karmatic sleep

Coming
Road long looking
But I'm still coming

Sticks and stones
Thrown along the way
Make it hard to continue

Till I start playing
My drums heart tune
Disconnect from the mess
And connect back into you

Aggressive at first
Turned quiet overnight
As bones settled
With what the
Heart already knew

Raw
Wet
Details
Fine art

Veins
Soaked
Blood
Fine art

Corrupt
Broken
Worned

Complete
End
Sworn

Abide
My love
Never look
Back again

What she wonders
What is it now
What do you want from me
You grovel at my feet
Hoping to be fed
I have no more to give you
Last night's bread
was all there was

These orphan lots
Set beneath me
Spend nights awaking
the dead things
That I sleep in

They crawl beneathe my veins
Hidden in shame
I drown thee
With perfect obligatory
With knives
Held captive
And needle poked in eyes thread

These words become jummbled
So I throw them up instead
Melt me many men
Have them come in
Shake off their grievances
Give thanks for what's been

Wonder if you might
You might just
Give them a fright

I don't know where to come
I keep telling you

Sure you do, you always do

Then why do I still question it

You do everytime,
let go and unwind
peace, harmony, relaxed mind, body, spirit, and soul
Let go
Let go
Let go

Let me choke you
A few more times

I slapped his ****
Across my cheek
Held it in my mouth
And did it again

Oh you nasty little girl
You love daddy's ****
Don't you

Suction your head
And make a loud pop
As I come off

Finger up your *** now
Spit and slide lips round and down
Pumping finger in and out

Cupping your ***** like a ring
******* you
Till I scream
Now get every last drop
Mmmm that's right

Above the night
We force into
Great components
Of afterlife after afterlife

We sail down bridges
And escape
The tunnels end
Finding peace and solice
Where once there was
A war within

She ran on empty
far too long
She kneeled
At the alter of creativity
And began to write

I'm so much more than
This little gift that
Art and poetry call to me

There's this little droplet
That won't fall down
To overfill my bucket

It seems to take shape
In this creature that
All started it
Her name was Tina
And she was my therapist

I lost her
Due to my unwillgness
Transference
And mentally not being
Able to be assertive

Yet I feel I was not
Heard
And just not trusted

So I'm at a point now
Where I'm willing and
I feel I deserve this

Humility and sobriety
A big plus
When starting over

I just hope she trust us
(us meaning my DID system!)
We shall see

Cause I'm ready
To start a new
Beginning with or without it
And ask God to take control
Of it!

You were my high
Hiding behind clouds of smoke
You were my numb
When I didn't give
A ****

You were my gifted
When I had a million
Things to say

You were my tarnished
When brains ends
Worn out too thin

You were the ashes
i drank
When I could not think

You were my loss
My remorse
I laid covered in

A sudden fade
To turn white skies
Grey

A driven desire
To kiss air
And make fire

You were mine
And always will be

Wishes on for hours
Ending bliss
A stolen kiss
Envious glares
Becoming unaware
That there's a signal
To the stares
That keep her there
Unprepared for
Rushes of sin
Sparkling tokens
Lost,
In an effort
To change
The way it's
Always been

The space
In between
Where we want
To be
And reality

What lies
Beneath
Will never be seen

What lies ahead
Is all in our head

Go for it
Make a dream

See the future
Break free
From what use to be

Hold dear
To the quiet atmosphere

Time here is inevitable
But the illusion
Is the lie

That takes us
From prison and hell
To doors we never
Thought were there

Loneliness can
cause a panic
In doubt
of mind and body
To crave
any passion

Makes momentary
sincerly imagintary

Real
For a moments
Use
For own
Insecurities

Tell me i lost you in my dreams
Not in real life I can't take that
Tell me tell me please you'll come back

The moon shivers
Under your embrace

The earth tangles
Under the sunlit kiss
When we spoke that day
My atoms were unified
As if you were inside of me
I felt perfect bliss
With a hint
Of love, aggression, and jealousy
I wondered if you've seen her
I've wondered if you've
Changed
You've sure gotten skinnier
I wasn't sure what to make of
The change
Clothes different
Hair back long
I figured yoy struggled
But what took you so long
I'd been waiting for you
And c to get together
I saw a change in her immediately
She began to ask all
Sorts of questions
Said you were still very much
Hung on me
I love you
I want you to feel that live everyday
In whatever shape or form
That comes in
You've been
Given a gift
I don't want to see you burn out
I love you
Like the restless soul I am
I wish to dive
Into you every night
Still I hold back
I still understand
Your desire
To get better
But nothing is wrong
You just lost part of me
I need you
Just as if I needed the rain

Love anyways

They are our illusions
They are our degree
The roots of what we step
Foot in
And the lack of unseen

Muderous tribes
Come to the feast
Sparing nothing less
Leaving only
Good intentions

My eyes grew dim
That moment
I first saw you

I swear you took my soul
breathed it in
And wrapped around your
Sweet sugar tongue

I watched mesmorized
As you inhaled
My smoke fumes
Watched me dance
around the room
Spinning on such sweet
afternotes of you

I tried to speak
As i watched my feet
Stood backwards
And felt your finger tips
Glide inside of me

I gazed up and down at you
But to no end
You said we could only be
Lovers after dew

Never before
And never again

I spring
Every winter
Waiting for you

I can't even pinpoint
When it begins
All I realize
Is that I'm somewhere else
Far away from here
Inside of loves layer
Built in my core

I'm lost in you

My mind spaces
What I was doing
Is now done
And I can't remember
Any of it
Cause I was there not here

Ahhhhhhhh

I don't even ask
For a ride
On loves wheels

It's like an alien invasion
Ur ****** up from the planet
Exsist in an open galaxy
Made of intoxicating inhales
And even better exhales
There is no other place
I'd think to be!

She sent me to a hellish destroyer
Called loves angel
Where I fall
I fall hard
Spinning square
In a circle of
Obsessive thoughts
Words
Music
Memories
Clips
Of me and you

It's in the idea of something
We find Love

You've released
in me a passion
and I can't resist
the satisfaction
of coming under
your spell

You have me
you've locked
me there!

Legs wrapped up tight
bound by day
alive at night
watching moon's rise
excites
ignites

fuels passion
inside

Common denominator
Portrayed witness
Lackless drive
Pure divine stationed
In this shallow heart of mine

Somewhere locked out of sight
I dive