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Nov 2017 · 393
Shell
IPM Nov 2017
I don't mind
the pebble in my shoe
I don't mind
three words that lost their core
I don't mind
the hidden scars on my back
I don't mind anything
anymore.
Nov 2017 · 264
V
IPM Nov 2017
V
My dear sweet little lady
tell me how you still feel
'cause even broken memories
are wounds that tend to heal.

You've passed through almost
everything,
cold creatures made of steel
my dear sweet little lady
tell me how you still feel.

I still can't even fathom
your strength, it seems
surreal,
'cause even when the dust was
settled
you never, ever kneeled.

My dear sweet little lady
tell me how you still feel
and know that broken memories
are wounds that always heal.
P.S
Though some nights I can hear
your silent lonely cries
they really come to show that:
from pain you always rise.
Oct 2017 · 188
Hate pt.2
IPM Oct 2017
It's the same old song
that's on repeat, since the day
I was born.
And it's not okay, but I know
where it comes from, I know this hate.
The feeling you get,
when you've lost respect
for a certain person
and he's just an insect.
So you sit and wish,
to clip it's wings
and dissect the body
tear off the limbs.
See if it still has
a grain of human feelings.
But no matter how hard it seems
even in your wildest dreams
he or she...does
and
sitting right next to you,
that person,
is a human being.
IPM Oct 2017
Headlights shining in the dark
somewhere in my distant dreams,
raindrops seem to fall apart
by the train's incoming beams.

Underneath the greyish skies
where my memories exist
past regrets briefly appear
in the shape of two red lips.

Seas of fog pour down the streets
drowning sights and silhouettes,
shapeless creatures fail to flee
trapped within their hopeless nets.

Often, lights illuminate
blurry faces of the mind,
where the train tracks
intertwine -
there, my memories I'll find.
Oct 2017 · 189
My calendar
IPM Oct 2017
The year
  I fear,
  the month
   still tears me
    the week
     is my weakness
      these days
       I'm listless
        and every hour
         I'm being devoured
          by every minute
           and second
            of hundredth
              sadness.
**** this year's been really experimental. I feel that the more I try out new things with my writing the more I find myself. And I don't see myself as some lyrical genius breaking past norms, far from it, I can't even call myself a decent poet. I can't say what resonates within people's hearts, but I can say this: I write down everything that comes to my mind in ways I find interesting. I also appreciate the fact that there are people who actually take their time to read this. So thanks.
Oct 2017 · 472
Fairy tail
IPM Oct 2017
Moonlight shimmers
and sparks the lights
of starlight roads
across the night.

s o m e w h e r e

Gentle winds softly caress
calm and soothing forest
trees,
the dark night firmly recreates
feelings of eternal peace.

l o s t

Somewhere below
the stale moon's embrace,
a man wanders lost
without a trace.

i n s i d e

His sanity wavers
his soul rips apart,
the blood pressure rises
in his hollow heart.

the

M  oonlight blinds
and dampens the lights
of starlight roads
across the night.

forest

Cold winds roughl  y strike
shivers down the lost soul's
spine,
the trees, as twisted as the night
****** a fraction of his  m  i n d.
Oct 2017 · 391
Grey city
IPM Oct 2017
Kept walking all alone
on busy streets,
in places where concrete
the soft rain meet.

Bright lights shine all around
with blinding beams,
the city seems so full
of empty dreams.

Cars often stacking up
in traffic lines,
a place where every man
peace never finds.

And still I'm walking down
these busy streets,
the city smiles at me
but never greets.
Oct 2017 · 237
Early
IPM Oct 2017
I struck, but smashed my head
in a cold, iron wall.
Oct 2017 · 387
My life story
IPM Oct 2017
As far as I remember
I remember - I was three
wake up, blow the candles
that's my first memory.

Didn't like to go outside
stayed at home, watched TV.
Had a couple childhood friends
now I barely even see.

Kindergarten, met a guy
probably my first true friend
now that guy can go to hell
not that I believe in it.

Tasted domestic abuse
from my dad's first hand
slapped so hard, my nose bled
he never hit me again.

Lost my innocence at six
seeing a decapitated cat
felt disgusted, made me sick
could do nothing and just sat.

Then my brother grew up
and he called me fat and ugly
wanted me to be like him
so he hit me quite frequently.

Wanted me to be a man
but he always held back
atleast that's what he said,
hence the bruises that I had.

Started going to school
racism flew all around
tried to be a good boy,
I was spat on with a crowd.

Decided to **** myself
at the early age of ten
knew that others had it worse,
but that added to the pain.

Had a couple childhood idols
I was even a fanatic,
but they made for some good times
and they weren't so traumatic.

Had a couple of close friends
that I still talk to this date,
but we don't meet up so often
as we used to, back in the day.

Middle school, had to move
said goodbye to all my friends
and the shock made me confused
with the chills that it still sends.

And my brother reached his peak
we would get in constant fights
in which I would always lose
so I cried alone at nights.

But I had my first crush
it was good, for a while.
Then I had to move again
to the highschool living style.

My brother graduated
and my parents went back home.
I was left with my grandparents,
but was mostly all alone.

In a cozy, rainy day
I decided to lose weight,
and have kept my promise since
never broke it like a saint.

Maybe that made me the man
that my brother always wanted,
though I don't care either way
it was my wish that I granted.

Found some interesting new hobbies
one of them was surely writing.
Through the sorrow and the pain
I looked up and kept on fighting.

Had to break my heart three times
just to put it in the freezer.
But it feels that even that
was a short glimpse of the teaser.

To be clear, I'll never want
anybody's empathy.
I walk the path that I have chosen
to a strong and better me.

And that's just the way it  goes
life, with all it's ups and downs.
This here was my life story,
up until now...
Oh boy, a long one.
Sep 2017 · 373
Reds
IPM Sep 2017
How did I end up here
in this gruesome clash,
threatened with a gun
by this human trash?

I don't know for sure
but for one I'm certain,
as the trigger pulls
down drops my curtain.

Back slams on the ground
now I'm left for dead,
blood spills from me
painting the concrete red.

As the pain numbs down
and my heartbeat slows,
all my lifelong dreams
leave my body cold.

****...is this the end?
Is this the end of me?
I wish someone was here
just to remember me...
and I wake up.
Sep 2017 · 348
Apathy
IPM Sep 2017
I've been asked
why I've been cold
or seemingly - just mean
tell you the truth,
quite recently
I don't care
for a thing.

I've been asked
quite frequently
to state my sanity,
or maybe I'm
just acting strange
against all clarity.

I've been asked
behind the scenes
why I hate my writing,
it may be so
that in my core
I don't want to be seen.

I've been asked...
what have I been asked ?
I don't remember it...
Ah, it's irrelevant
I still don't care
and never will begin...






yet, deep inside,
where all my feelings
sparkle, dimly lit
it may be short, but
for a while... I care
a tiny bit...
Sep 2017 · 466
Setback
IPM Sep 2017
It's my pride
                        It's my cross
I hold to
                        to carry
it's my fruit
                          it's my loss
I see through
                                     to bury
with countless tries
                                     and, all-in-all
we fall to rise
                            we rise to fall
Sep 2017 · 339
Mr. Pebbles
IPM Sep 2017
It's hard being a rock
with a hard surface
rough around the edges
hard to lift
or
warm you up,
wish I was
a river instead.
Just some thoughts I've been having recently.
Sep 2017 · 330
She
IPM Sep 2017
She
You've abandoned me, my dear
you left and left a mess
no goodbyes, no farewells
let alone - a caress.

You've abandoned me, my dear
knowing my issues well
still, you went anyway
leaving a hollow shell.

You've abandoned me, my dear
suffice to say, it's late
too late to call you mine
when all you left is hate.
Sep 2017 · 330
What's a heart?
IPM Sep 2017
What's a heart?
Well, clearly an
*****
then again
also a daisy
a little frail,
a little pale
out of curiosity,
you pluck a petal-
and then you're gone.
Sep 2017 · 373
Ouro
IPM Sep 2017
As obscurity prevails,
and the dark moon sets
the tone,
while the shadow still
entrails
with the nightmare in
my home.

A simple, even childish
fear,
slowly, but surely on
the trace
dimming the light as it
nears,
chuckles as it sees my
face.

With a grasp, long as
the night
and a mouth lusting for
blood,
grabs, expecting little
fight
growls, as a monster should.

A nightmare! I'm shocked!
It's been too long...
I haven't had these in
a while...
And as my head rests -
the same old song,
a music box with sounds
too vile.
Sep 2017 · 467
Empty
IPM Sep 2017
Feel so
feel so empty
must be
must be that
I seek so
much attention
though
never truly had...

It should be
should be
senseless
to sulk it in
like that
I don't deserve
attention
for wanting it so bad...
Sep 2017 · 230
Soulless
IPM Sep 2017
Silently, my steps are creaking
in the dimming light at sight
and the dark is slowly speaking
from engravings in the night.

As to what are we, what do we
live for - for what to achieve?
Are we here to fight for freedom,
or to simply make believe?
Are we here to just be born
grow up, pass through puberty
grow old, poor and still unknowing
stating: "that's just life for me..."
"That's just life for me"-
a giant flash with all it's stakes
so live it like driving a car
and race through life without the brakes.
Pass everything: your friends, your kids,
your marriage, even those late night shifts.
Don't ever stop! Full speed ahead!
After all, life is the greatest of gifts...
Don't stop to think! You're number one!
The loser gets the second place!
And even so, as time goes on
these legs will reach the rusty brakes,
but they won't work, and in a flash
all life you had will skip your head.
Moments later - crash! The car then hits.
The race goes on, yet you lay dead.
Now you're a corpse inside a coffin
your body, like the wheel - it spins.
the race goes on, but in the end
the dirt is still the one who wins.

Silently, my steps are fading
far away from human sight
darkness falls on the engravings,
in this lonely, soulless night.
Sep 2017 · 378
A message
IPM Sep 2017
Has it really been this long?
Being a child that never cared
falling asleep to that old song,
the lullaby my mother shared.

Have these four years really passed?
Since I felt that aching rise
around my chest, hoping it lasts
by telling all those little lies.

Has it really been four months?
I saw it happen, all over then
letting the bullet slightly pass,
right through my heart, to softly rend.

Has it really been four weeks?
Since the wound had opened up
again, with the slightest leaks
of light, in my darkened mind.

And yet... I find it quite disturbing,
the fact, that I've been holding up
from suffering in brighter dark,
I guess it's time.
That makes you strong...
Sep 2017 · 285
Worn-out
IPM Sep 2017
Words come out
not at my will
sometimes they even fade
but when I catch
a feather once
my muse will guide the way.
So - inspire me!
Inspire me!
Inspire my free choice,
inspire me and I promise you,
I'll listen to your voice.
And even when
the light begins
to fade away and flee,
I know that if
I finish it
my work will stay,
with me.
Aug 2017 · 358
Spellbound
IPM Aug 2017
Just like a spell,
just like a breeze
your words will always
make me freeze...

Even when I
fall asleep
and with my thoughts
I dig too deep -
just like a spell,
just like a breeze
your words will always
make me freeze.

So when I'm all alone
and see no texts
pop on my phone
I know that you're still there - inside your head
where nothing leaves
the lair.

And I will always remember
the August, that felt like
December, because...
.. just like a spell,
just like a breeze
my heart was locked
away,
and someone stole
the keys.
Aug 2017 · 285
Glad you were there
IPM Aug 2017
Eternity is trying to make the most out of a single moment.
And in that moment, you were eternity.
Aug 2017 · 293
Deprived
IPM Aug 2017
Anger keeps me up at night.
Anger, shrouding every light,
depriving me of my own right,
to dream for you across my bed.

So long as I'm awake at 3.
So long as you're away from me,
for all I have is what I see.
Alone, my pillow wraps my head.

I shake again, against my will,
my mind can't see beyond the hill,
a mist is hiding - that's what I feel,
and all in love - are living dead

Because love is joy,
and love is cruel.
Love is true to just a few,
and love is what makes me a fool.

The morning comes and I'm awake,
the anger goes, the silence breaks.
For even if my heart they take,
I stand right here, with no tears shed.
One of the first poems I've ever written. Just decided to finally share it.
Aug 2017 · 328
See me
IPM Aug 2017
Round and gorgeous
eyes,
dancing on the snow
blazing in disguise
freezing for the show.

Careless in their
work,
cautious in their game
silently, they lurk
loudly, they would blame.

Yellow, even red
dancing with no shame,
round and gorgeous
eyes,
cautious in their game.
Aug 2017 · 442
Near
IPM Aug 2017
Show me your petals
I want you to bloom,
your eyes shine like medals
when I'm close to you.

Sickened of crows
perching above,
your body's my drug
that got me in love.

So show me your petals
in the endeavor,
so I can wait here
and watch you forever.
Aug 2017 · 676
Balcony
IPM Aug 2017
Is it strange?
I hear different sounds,
paletts, colours,
I'm music bound.

Is it strange?
I can't sleep very well
hearing notes, tones,
imagining bells.

Is it strange?
The bells ring loudly
they never stop
they deafen me proudly.

Is it strange?
Seeing you everynight
whilst I work on the balcony,
I can feel your soft glance.
Aug 2017 · 214
Midnight
IPM Aug 2017
Moon at peace
I'd like to reach
your song
that has no words
Aug 2017 · 254
So
IPM Aug 2017
So
I'm alone
it hurts sometimes to smile
by having thoughts so vile
I'm alone

"You're not alone"
Can you just shut up?
I already gave it all up
I am alone

"You're alone"
I know
it's all I'm good for
I'm alone

"You're alone..."
Really?
I didn't know
I'm alone

"You're alone again..."
It's not that bad
I'll just patch what I had
I'm alone

"Don't pretend you're not alone"
What for
will it change something from before?
I'll still be alone

"I hate being alone"
No I don't
I'm used
to being alone

I'm alone
with chaotic thoughts
that fly away like little moths
and show me,
that I'm still alone...
Aug 2017 · 285
Bloom
IPM Aug 2017
Flowers are blooming
a sight to be seen
on the day we were born

Flowers are glooming
with passing of ages
it's time now to mourne

Flowers are crying
in tears of regret
for the words never said

Flowers are dying
down with the coffin
in a dead man's bouquet
Jul 2017 · 241
Amass
IPM Jul 2017
Replace my warm heart
with a cold edged blade
there's a hole torn apart
where the heart was once laid.
Jul 2017 · 267
Error
IPM Jul 2017
This skin is rough
my hands have calusses,
and wounds lie all around
my eyes have bags
and the analysis
shows talent not yet found.

Because all I grasp
all my work
and everything I glance
just rots away
falls in decay
and dies in my rough hands.

I truly am talentless
Jul 2017 · 259
Dove
IPM Jul 2017
My house is so empty
it's empty again
and I've been trying to do
as much as I can
but no matter the work
I still need my two hands
just to be with you
just to hold you
just to be what I am

And I don't need to tell you
how I'm not okay
And you don't need to know
how I hate everyday
And I don't need to tell you
you'll know anyway
Because you just see
right through me
and you know what to say

And I'll miss every second
I'll be counting down
I'll be watching closely
just to see you around
I'll miss your soft touch
on my rough skin, so now
just relax
and keep silent
don't make any sound.
Jul 2017 · 180
Simple worries
IPM Jul 2017
Before I fall asleep
let's make it very clear,
the reason's not in you...
it's me you have to fear.

Before you read this letter
I'll hide it somewhere safe
away, it will be better
with lies I like to bathe...

Before you run away
and follow in their steps
I'll show you something dear
so come with me and let's...

Let's see what's hidden here
let's see, but you just can't
because it's pain and tears
with darkest of intents.

You now know everything
and don't you dare to frown,
because these feelings hurt
and all they do
is weigh me down...
Jul 2017 · 411
A secret encounter
IPM Jul 2017
Beast howling in the night,
depriving me of sleep.
Oh, come and lick my wounds,
the rest is yours to keep.

I've fought you all my life,
but here you are again.
Beast howling in the night,
my life is yours to drain.

Corruption swarms my brain,
yet scared I am no more,
a monster you may be,
the beast that I adore...
This one's an old poem I deleted once. Don't want to make that mistake again.
Jul 2017 · 425
Thank You
IPM Jul 2017
I'm sorry, can you play
for me?
My ears are ringing
now,
they're waiting for you
faithfully,
to soothe them with your
call.

The others never mattered
for you, I write
it all
and even when I'm
shattered
your warmth will be
my goal.

Because you taught me
everything,
you taught me how to
smile,
you freed my heart and
let it sing
to thank you for the
while...

So play again, play
for me
the remnant of your
soul
and I'll just listen
carefully,
the quiet piano.
Jul 2017 · 404
Time well spent
IPM Jul 2017
It's been too long,
too long since I've felt
a thing
feelings seem to last
forever
so everlong, but fade
like a dream.

It's harsh out here,
summer seems to
never end,
yet snow is all that's in
my mind,
the fading fire -
my only friend.

A rainy sound,
softly - from outside
it came
it's summer, so I ask
myself
why does it always have
to rain?

It's been too long,
the time I've spent in this
lair,
so harsh out here, don't
you know?
So harsh, but you never
cared...
Jul 2017 · 429
Swept away
IPM Jul 2017
Just plain and simple
a boring existence
persisting from day to day,
doing nothing nimble
without no resistence
like dust, I'll be swept away.
Jul 2017 · 298
Seasons
IPM Jul 2017
Indoors again in this summer day
the warmest of winds violently blows
and peaceful memories, remind me of May
painting the image
of ashes and snow.

Ashes and snow,
the Spring was my Fall,
bullet shaped snowflakes
shoot through my view,
and splatter my heart
staining the wall
leaving a messege -
"I'll always love you..."
Jul 2017 · 393
Questions
IPM Jul 2017
What would you do
if you had an eternity
to do whatever you wish?
Would you, read every book
for knowledge and truth
to capture the essence of life?
Or maybe you'd paint
swirling your brush silently
on the grandest of frames
beyond the walls of time.
Sadly, it all ends.
Every word written,
every stroke made
every stone carved
wash away like the sand in the ocean,
within the ashes of the infinite cosmos.
It costs us many tiresome hours and allnighters
for the smallest cause - fulfilling our dreams, small and grand.
Funny, how everything ends.
No one lays in a bed of roses
in their final moments, in fact
time keeps moving forward
and actions don't make the reality bend.
Reproduction seems pointless for everything we bestow
upon the future generations is gone with the wind tomorrow.
Is it all pointless?
No matter the struggle of our soul to get noticed by somebody just for a second
in this abyss we call life, we ask ourselves - is it worth it?
Is it worth all the suffering,
just because we feel and feel just because we exist
repeating a cycle that's already sealed?
To answer the question before
what I would do if I had all the time in the universe
is try hard, until my bones were sore.
Naive - perhaps, considering all the previous words,
but maybe that's all we have.
Maybe trying and even failing
is the right thing to do
just to make something beautiful, because everything else hurts.
Maybe life isn't so cruel
and it's all a facade
created by sadness
and loneliness being it's fuel.
Either way, it's all I have
and I won't stop trying
for all the hours I've spent working
all the days I've wasted
in a sad week of crying
will all be for nought if I just quit.
Someday, I might also create something worth remembering,
but before that day, I'll try until I fit.
Jul 2017 · 350
Hurt
IPM Jul 2017
Stabbing myself hurts less,
hurts less than your lies,
hurts less than this mess...
Stabbing myself hurts less...
all I wanted was someone to care...
Jun 2017 · 297
Every other day...
IPM Jun 2017
I cried today
it's not my fault,
that tears drop from my eyes
I cried today,
it's not my fault
my smile is a disguise...

I cried today...
it's all my fault
for bashing my own head,
I cried today
it's all my fault...
...I'll suffer in my bed.
I don't even want to tag it. It speaks for itself ...
Jun 2017 · 1.1k
Mistress
IPM Jun 2017
Every time I miss her,
I suffer from a single thought
every time I kiss her -
she loves me,
she loves me not...

Travelled from a distance,
a single glance just to be cought,
for my precious mistress
she loves me,
she loves me not.

Questions like these warring -
for my sanity they fought
Her feelings never showing,
does she love me...
...she loves me, not.
Jun 2017 · 346
Dungeon of eternity
IPM Jun 2017
Thousand years I've lived in
snares,
by the darkest cells of
time
frightening everyone who
dares...
punished for unproven
crimes.

Release my soul! - is all
I plead,
but never answered stayed
the prays,
anger in my mouth was fed
bound by shackles-
were cursed my days.

And every try, every blade
couldn't slay this cursed
beast,
a single light above
begins to fade,
on plates, stacked with
feathers
my jailers feast...
Jun 2017 · 511
Mate
IPM Jun 2017
Seeds of doubt outgrow me
    whenever I can't hear my voice,
          the highest form of cruelty
              is playing chess without a choice

                                      A game of kings,no,game of war
                       the board is silent like the night
              but deep inside, inside our core
      we know, it's just our inner fight...

                          The pawns are down, in sacrifice
                        a game for kings and queens to win
                       and us, the pawns, are never blessed
                          we never lived, we've never been.
Jun 2017 · 423
Dear diary...
IPM Jun 2017
Who needs enemies,
when you've got friends
that never ask
or check your health.

Who needs friends,
they're all my enemies
with just one purpose-
to bask in wealth...
Jun 2017 · 405
Figure
IPM Jun 2017
Apparitions meet throughout,
mysterious figures lurk about,
distanced from my sight, I see
a cross, on it written-
a nameless being...

Lovely night, is it not?
Though, the air thickens.
I shall not mourn today,
my time here quickens.

In need of peace
I reached here, tonight.
Restrains of my thought cease,
like feathers in flight.

Our eyes have never met
nor have our feelings twined,
conversing in this mist,
your guidance I must find.

Buried deep, with graves
and dirt,
words lost in the desert,
a truth stays unspoken.
The mist reaveals,
the cross lays broken...
Jun 2017 · 304
He
IPM Jun 2017
He
Today you told me
you don't care.
It hurt like hell.
I realised you're a
failure.
I'm a failure's failure,
can't you tell?
Jun 2017 · 630
Low battery
IPM Jun 2017
I'm lying in my little
home,
my dim-lit phone, I'm all
alone,
now staring at my dim-lit
phone,
I miss your call, I miss your call...

At last, this scent entraps my
nose,
the smell of rose, it must be
yours...
and yet, my body isn't
close...
it's not near yours, it can't
be yours...

-This dream again! It's night, I'm home,
a giant hole, I call it
home...
a little light - it's just my phone,
I'm all alone, I'm all
alone...
Jun 2017 · 306
Hate
IPM Jun 2017
An open window clears,
outside, the rain appears,
but this pair of glowing eyes
like spears, begin to pierce.

Three children playing in the
rain,
they laugh, they smile,
they share their pain...
...where did those summer
days go?

...Away, as time flies away,
the leaves begin to fall
the street, covers by rain.
Two silhouettes - in joy
they walk.

For hours lasts this walk,
the lonely street, they fill
with talk.
He whispers in her ear...

Then passion strikes the ground,
a kiss, like thunder,
deafens every sound.
A face, familiar -
reappears.

Two feet, splash in the
rain,
two hearts are one,
one waits, in vain.
This lonely tear
drops on the dirt...

Fists, covered now
in blood,
painting the wall,
with screams and calls...
...the darkest thought
remains.

Hate, shrouds the raging
mind.
Hate for this love,
hate, whispers from above,
it's chains - begin to bind.

An open window locks,
the rain has stopped,
the silence mocks.
Those eyes, as always-
fierce,
they pierce with hate,
yet fill with tears...

— The End —