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Nightingale74 Apr 2016
To feel your hand in my hand,
Your words in my ear,
Your heart beneath my palm--
I would give anything.

I picture your soft voice
Chasing away the sadness
And lending hope to my broken heart.
My world feels empty,
My forces lacking.
How am I to tackle this war
With no one on my side?

True--
My God is loving;
He is strong and compassionate.
I know that in him,
I cannot fail.

But staying ahead of failure
Is not the same as finding success.
If I am to succeed,
This emptiness must be filled.
I need strength beside me,
As well as within me.

I need a hand to hold,
And a smile to return.
Why did God give you to me,
Only to let the distance keep you from me?
Nightingale74 Sep 2015
How do I say the words
I feel in my heart?
How do I tell you that I love
The way that you make me smile?
If I knew how,
Then I would tell you
How much you mean to me.
I'd show you the light
You bring into my life.
I'd say you are perfect—
Not the flawless sort of perfect,
But the sort that makes me want to be,
A better me than I am right now.
And even though I can't feel you close to me,
I can still feel you in my heart.
Yes, you have a place there.
And you fit perfectly,
As if you've always been there.
These feelings are new to me,
Like a pathway unexplored.
But I think I want to walk it—
To take the road less traveled.
If i offered you my hand,
Asking you to walk with me,
Would you choose to take it?
Nightingale74 Jan 2016
For a while I've had thoughts and feelings,
Floating around in my mind;
Emotions I've tried to grasp,
Words I've tried to form.
But I can't quite seem to spin my thoughts of straw
Into words of gold.
How do I tell you that I love
The way you make me smile?
If I only knew how,
Then I would tell you
How much you mean to me.
I'd show you the light
You bring into my life,
Like the warm glow of a candle.
Or the stars that aligned
And caused our paths to cross.
If I ever got the chance,
I'd thank you for being the kind of person
That makes me want to be,
A better me than I am right now.
Nightingale74 Sep 2015
When you're dead inside,
you need something--
or someone
to believe in.
So believe in yourself.

Because you are made
of something great--
something so...
incredible.
So believe in yourself.

You can accomplish
anything and
everything
if you just try.
So believe in yourself.

When your world falls down,
only you will
be there to
pick yourself back up.
So believe in yourself!
Nightingale74 Oct 2015
I once was a sailor,
braving the seas of desire.
I was young and I was stupid—
oh, how I regret it.

The waves, they numbed me.
The wind, it soothed me.
I thought all was well and good—
I was very, very wrong.

Desire is a lying, vengeful thing.
I learned this with pain that still stings.
I thought I knew what I wanted—
but by the sea I was blinded.

I was rocked, my will was swayed.
I thought no one could give me aid.
The sky was dark—
and so was my heart.

And then I saw with wond’ring awe,
a lighthouse set upon a hill.
But it was far—
and I was scared.

So I shut my eyes,
the dark was ice.

Then the waves, they took me,
somewhere, somewhere out to sea.
But quicker than my heart could sigh—
I was left alone to die.

Surely in my messed up mind,
I knew how desire could bind,
faster than a viper—
you’re never truly free.

I tried my very hardest,
to take the weight from off my chest.
To steer my boat away—
from all the crushing, burning guilt.

Then I felt something on my hands,
and saw that they were iron bands.
I couldn’t flee, I couldn’t move—
I was a prisoner to myself.

I was a slave of my wicked will,
captured under an evil spell.
Yet my conscience left untouched—
so that I felt every single little cut.

I tried with all I had to fight,
for I knew this wasn’t right.
I should be home safe and sound—
not sinking in this sea of sin.

Yet there was no land in sight,
no end, no hint of saving light.
I thought, I felt, and I believed—
that I was wicked in my heart.

My fate was set, my time was up,
consigned to drink the bitter cup.
From me, Hope’s saving grace had fled—
but that was when Her light returned.

I saw a radiant, beaming glow,
shining bright to shun the foe.
Once again I closed my eyes—
though this time it was for shame.

But then I heard a voice appear
that pierced me to my very core.
My eyes were opened—
my heart took courage.

That little beam of light,
it led me from my plight.
Yet still I struggled long and hard—
to brave the reefs of penance.

But because my goal was in my mind,
my iron chains I could unbind.
And through that blessed, saving Grace—
I soon docked at Heaven’s wharf.
Nightingale74 Oct 2015
A dream is a wish your heart makes,
when you’re fast asleep.
Then when you must wake,
will that dream keep?

Dreams wake us up,
the let us live.
But to make them come true,
How much must we give?

We all have a dream,
to sing, to dance, or paint a work of art.
Or maybe we wish
to teach, to travel, or help others find a heart.

There’s a fork in the road we must pass
every waking day.
Both paths are different,
each with a price to pay.

Will we choose to live our dream,
whatever it may take?
Or will we choose the other path,
and our dreams forsake?
Nightingale74 Sep 2015
Rolling seas of amber-gold,
Chocolate trunks with scarlet leaves.
Vibrant yellows, flaming oranges
Like the embers of a fire dying.
The winds have changed,
The birds fly south.
For Summer's heat
Has come and gone.
The days are shorter,
The nights are growing.
A cold, crisp Breeze
Nips my nose.
It lifts my hair
And chills my neck.
I close my eyes
And breathe it in.
Whispers of forgotten warmth,
Fleeting thoughts of green and blue.
A peaceful mem'ry...
A soothing dream...
Cause now I see
Rolling seas of amber-gold,
Chocolate trunks with scarlet leaves.
Vibrant yellows, flaming oranges.
Like the embers of a fire dying.
Nightingale74 Sep 2015
Five green and speckled frogs sat on a speckled log.
They tell you one jumped,
But he didn’t—
He died.
And when he died,
The other four looked up into the clouds,
With heavy hearts.
And though they willed the drops to fall,
The clouds were empty.
What would the others say?
They thought.
So one after another, those green and speckled frogs…
Died.
One by one they left their fellow frogs
To battle with the empty skies,
Till only one was left—
All alone.
He saw the empty log,
And he suddenly felt so small
In a world that felt so big.
And then…
Then the skies opened up,
And it poured.
Nightingale74 Jan 2016
It's a daunting task to fix yourself.
It's like trying to clean a toddler's room,
Or raking leaves on a windy day.
It's an endless task,
Cause it's never just one thing—
When it rains, it pours.
Be kind to others,
Work hard at school.
Love your father,
Always say your prayers.
Don't be so depressed,
Don't be such a dork.
Try to be more friendly,
Try to make new friends.
You've got to lose those extra pounds.
Oh, but please don't starve yourself!
Control your thoughts,
Control your words.
Be responsible,
And be mature.
Make sure you get enough sleep,
But you can't sleep the day away.
Be an example for all to see—
You never know who's watching.
I can't do this all at once!
Nightingale74 Oct 2015
I remember as a child,
Looking up to the older kids,
Thinking they were so cool.
And now,
All of a sudden the tables have turned.
I'm not a little kid anymore;
I've entered the stage of turning points
And life-changing choices.
I feel like my life is a news cast,
With reporters on every corner,
Trying to get their nosy noses
All up in my business.
I feel as though I am stripped and vulnerable—
I have no answers to their questions.
I used to dream of doing great things,
And now it's time to choose
Whether or not those dreams will become reality.
I'm told that I should follow my heart,
But what if I don't know what my heart is saying?
The dreams I used to have...
I don't know how to fit them in my life.
I thought I knew what I wanted,
I thought I knew what I loved.
But now I'm not so sure
If I can align my fantasy with the rules of life.
I'm afraid to make the decisions
That will determine my destiny.
I guess that's what happens when you grow up.
Nightingale74 Jan 2016
"I love you."
I love you like a sister,
I love you like a brother,
I love you like a friend,
I love you like a lover.

Love—
One word with countless meanings.
In my life I have loved many.
And in return,
I have been loved by many.
And yet, there is still so much I have to learn
About the art of loving.

Love—
A word defined in many different ways.
Is it possible for love to bloom,
Even in the absence of physical touch?
Can it grow and flourish,
Despite the forces
Trying to destroy it?

Love—
A timeless idea that has withstood the ages.
Can young hearts understand what it means
To share your love with another?
They say you're too young to know what love is.
But I beg to differ.
After all, it is MY heart we're talking about.

Is love really so complicated?
When my heart said "I love you,"
Why wouldn't my lips form the words?
Nightingale74 Sep 2015
Angry words and vengeful tones
dripped like poison
from our lips.

We were both to blame.

But you said you're just human,
so it's okay.
What about me?

Aren't I human too?

You said it was all my fault,
but then you said
you loved me.

I don't understand.

Your words are salt in my wounds,
so I'll just say
I'm sorry.

But are you sorry?
Nightingale74 Oct 2015
I see the light shine on your face.
You look down and then you giggle.
I wonder what has made you smile…
“That’s for me to know,”
you say.
Okay then.

I hear the chime again.
Then the smile,
and a frenzied tapping.
I can’t help but roll my eyes.
And you don’t notice—
but I knew you wouldn’t.

You look up and pretend to be
engaged in what’s around.
But I know why your foot’s tapping
impatiently.
Finally another chime,
like funeral bells

I’m watching you,
but I don’t think you notice.
How is it,
that the ones who are not present,
have become more present
than the ones who are?
Nightingale74 Jan 2016
I look at the world,
I look in the mirror.
I see so much wrong,
Wherever I look.
Nightingale74 Sep 2015
Why must the tortured
ice their darkened, bitter cakes
with pretty frosting?
Nightingale74 Oct 2015
A thin, jagged line
Of blinding light,
Cuts through the sky.
Pure electricity—
Quick as lightning—
It’s there, and then it’s gone.
It dazzles the dark sky
Like a deadly firework.
It lights up the gloomy world—
Just in time to disappear—
And plunge back into darkness.
Nightingale74 Sep 2015
I know who I am
And where I came from.
I know I'm not perfect,
and that's okay.
Life's not always easy—
it'll knock you down.
But the key to life,
what it means
to truly live,
is this:
Look up.
When you're down in the dirt,
Look up.
Find the strength
to follow your gaze.
When life's darker than night,
Look up.
Find the hope
that there's light up there.
When people are unkind,
Look up.
Find the courage
to pass them by.
Whenever life gets tough,
Look up.
Try to remember
the One who lives up there.
Nightingale74 Feb 2016
These woods are lovely, dark, and deep,
But I have promises to keep,
And miles to go before I sleep.*

My woods are but a figure of speech.
Still, they are lovely, dark, and deep
And we have promises to keep.

The miles separate me from you.
Love and friendship stay through and through,
But a broken heart will stay true.

Your strong arms are wrapped around me,
Holding me close, helping me see.
We don't have to touch to feel.
Nightingale74 Sep 2015
The heart wants what it wants,
Yet a want is not a need.
For the heart can want,
But the mind will lead.

My heart is guarded.
I’ll let it beat,
Only when I deem it safe.
But for now my heart is quiet,
Cause my mind’s the one that’s guiding.

Until one day,
When I gave my heart the reigns;
I let it beat.
I opened up a window,
And saw the skies were clear.

But then you came and blindly slammed it shut.
You took my wish, my hope,
And now my heart is stinging,
Hurting,
Angry.

I cannot hope, I cannot love,
For fear of getting hurt.
But I chose to hope,
I chose to love,
And now I’m stuck with pain.

Yet I will take my beating heart
From the safety of my chest.
I will take it out for you, and lay it on the rocks.
I will let you walk across,
To find your happy ending.

I’ll let my aching heart be a bridge
And not a wall.
Because I love you,
And I always will.
Now go off and find your wings;
Learn to use them and live your dreams.

And you’ll never have to know
Who it was that made those wings,
From the fibers of
Her beating,
Aching heart—

A heart that once was guarded,
Beating only
When the game was safe.
And now it’s quiet once again,
For the mind has gained control.

The heart wants what it wants,
Yet a want is not a need.
For the heart can want,
But the mind will lead.
Nightingale74 Sep 2015
Life is made up of moments.
Happy ones,
Sad ones,
And in-between ones.
Our task is to recognize these moments,
And then fill them.
What’s the point of living in future moments,
That we still have yet to experience?
Why let our thoughts dwell on past moments,
When what’s most important
Is the moment right now?
Live each day,
Soaking in the moments,
Don’t let them pass you by.
Cherish what’s important to you—
Never let it go.
Find those moments,
And live them.
Nightingale74 Sep 2015
I believe there are angels.
They live among us,
hiding behind masks
so effective
they fool even the wearer.
These masks aren't pretty
cause life's not easy,
even for angels.
I know an angel.
The cuts on her legs
make her think she's
a mistake.
Cause if she weren't,
then why would people hurt her?
They toss around insults
like candy.
They speak in angry tones,
hardly ever kind ones.
They brush her off
like sand.
No one pays attention,
no one really knows.
No one knows the pain she's forced to go through.
But I do.
I see the way they treat her.
I know how it makes her feel.
And it kills me.
She's haunted by demons
night and day.
They torment her.
They scare her.
They push her closer to the edge.
And I see it in her eyes...
alive but dying.
I can see through her eyes...
it's how I see past her mask.
Her eyes say the words
her lips will not.
They plead for help,
they yearn to be saved
from the darkness
closing in...
too fast...
But what she doesn't see,
is all the strength she needs
is within her heart already,
hidden behing the mask.
And though she may seem broken,
she's still an angel.
She has a purpose...
something only she can do.
She has her mask to help her,
cause though it seems a burden,
one day it'll lift another's.
I know someday she'll find her wings.
One day she'll understand.
But until then,
I'll be with her,
I'll give her strength,
I'll lift her up.
Cause she's my angel,
and she always will be.
Until the very end
Nightingale74 Sep 2015
Eighty years
to love,
Twenty-nine thousand, two hundred days
to leap,
Seven hundred thousand, eight hundred hours
to learn,
Forty-two million, forty-eight thousand minutes
to laugh,
Two billion, five hundred and twenty-two million, eight hundred and eighty thousand seconds
to live,
One lifetime
to leave…
Nightingale74 Jan 2016
Too many of us,
Waste away our lives
In search of perfection—
The perfect love,
The perfect match,
A perfect fit.
Too many of us
Are unsatisfied with the perfection
We already have.
See, I think we've got it all wrong.
Imperfection is not
The absence of perfection.
Rather,
Perfection is simply,
The presence of imperfection.
Nightingale74 Sep 2015
I once considered,
the reflection that I see,
isn't really me.
For what I'm looking at
is just someone in reverse.
Nightingale74 Sep 2015
Walking down silent halls,
Fingers trailing along empty walls.
Laying in the quiet dark,
Thinking of how I’ve left my mark.
Staring into empty space,
Tears slipping down the sides of my face.
Wond’ring why we have to part,
Feeling the beat of my aching heart.
It’s really hard to say goodbye,
To a part of who you are inside.
Nightingale74 Jan 2016
It’s a funny thing
How two hearts can intertwine,
Even under the strangest of circumstances.
Bonds have a way of forming
Right before your eyes,
Yet just beyond your view.
It’s not until you close your eyes
To the world around you,
And take a step back,
That you realize
What a beautiful thing you have,
Growing in the palm of your hand.
It’s like a little light
Shining in between your fingers,
Filling your soul with warmth,
Making your heart smile.
And it’s then when you learn
That the most precious things in life
Are those seen with the heart.
Nightingale74 Sep 2015
I am a star,
Shining bright for all to see.
Until I remember,
There are millions more aside from me.

I am a star,
Who on her own shines brightly.
But there’s always one
Who smugly must outshine me.

I am a star,
Always there, but try as I might,
It won’t take much
To outshine my feeble light.

I am a star,
Who can’t find her place in the sky.
But someday you’ll see,
I’ll be brighter than the moon, ever nigh.
Nightingale74 Jan 2016
I try to find the words I want to say,
But they just won't come.
I want the things I feel, to be the things I write.
But the words won't come.

When I write a poem,
The words in my heart must be translated
Into a language
That can be both seen and heard.

But sometimes the translator gets stuck,
In trying to read
My deepest, truest emotions
Amongst the jumble of my thoughts.

And so now I'm stuck
With a plethora of locked-up feelings,
Yearning to be said.
And this is what they call, the writer's block.
Nightingale74 Oct 2015
There once was a bear,
Who sat all alone
On the toy store shelf.
He watched as his friends
Were gently taken
Off that wooden shelf.
They had soft brown fur
And handsome bow ties,
Just like he did.
But their golden coats
Must’ve been softer,
Their bow ties neater.
What made them special?
Why were they chosen,
And not this poor bear?
Days turned into weeks,
And weeks into months.
Still, he sat alone.
So now, he still sits,
Watching and waiting,
Wondr’ing why he’s there.
What good is a bear
With no one to hold,
No one to comfort?
What difference could he–
A lonely stuffed bear–
Make in this big word,
From all alone
On that toy store shelf?
Nightingale74 Sep 2015
Have you ever felt
trapped in your own skin,
a prisoner of what
others think of you?
They say you're quiet,
so you're quiet.
They say you're a good kid,
so you're good.
They think they know who you are,
like you're a puzzle
they've pieced together.
So you've gotta fit the frame
they've made for you.
But I wanna be me!
I wanna show them
who I really am.
I want them to see
what's on my inside.
And once they know that;
I can be free.
It's time for me to let
my true colors show.
I won't be defined
by how I'm classified.
You can't label me,
I won't let you.
Sometimes I'm a good girl
sometimes I'm sweet.
But sometimes I break the rules
and I'm kinda sassy.
You think you've got me figured out,
like you've solved the mystery
of my crazy life.
But it's time for you to see
That isn't who I am.
Cause I wanna be me!
I wanna show them
who I really am.
I want them to see
what's on my inside.
And once they know that;
I can be free.
And I'm no longer gonna hide
this growing fire
inside my heart.
I'm gonna let it all out.
I'll raise my voice,
I'll tell the world,
That I'm gonna be me!
And I'll show them
who I really am.
They're going to see
what's on my inside.
And once they know that
I will be free!
Yes, I will be free!
Nightingale74 Sep 2015
I’ve got a stitch along my arm,
and a patch across my side.
There’s a thread sticking out of my hair,
and a band-aid over my chest.
My body is covered in bandages,
with seams running every which way.
I feel like the stuff that’s inside me,
is seeping out through my tears.
With every single step I take,
comes the fear of falling apart.
But for now, I’m held together
by these few threads of hope.
Hope that I’ll someday find myself
whole and brave and strong once more.
Until that day, I’ll keep walking forward,
finding strength in the peace I’ve sewn together.
Nightingale74 Jan 2016
My heart hurts.
I wish that I could unthink
The things I've thought tonight.
I want things to stay the way they are,
I want to let our little sprout
Grow into the rose it yearns to be.

I think I love you.
Cause the thought of never again
Seeing that beautiful smile of yours,
Makes my heart ache.

I know I never should have
Opened my heart to you.
From the very start,
This love was destined to end.
It was a wishful fantasy;
An all-too-perfect dream.
But even so...
If I were given the chance
To remake my choice,
I think I'd do it all again.
Because this hurt,
These tears that I'm about to cry,
Are proof that what I'm feeling is real.

I don't want to let you go,
I don't want to see this end.
It's been perfect,
And I've loved every minute of it.
But I think it's best if we stop.
Cause if it hurts now,
How much more will it hurt,
If we wait till our hearts are closer?
I wish that I could unthink
The things I’ve thought tonight.
Nightingale74 May 2016
Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Happiness--
Rights promised to us by men too old to remember.
Happiness is hard to Pursue,
Hard to find.
And sometimes the search leads you
Down paths that steal your Liberty...
Leaving you to wonder,
What's the point in Life?
Nightingale74 Oct 2015
Shall I compare thee to a summer’s day?
No—
That bard Will has beaten me to it.
Half a league, half a league—
But the Light Brigade gives its thanks
to my Lord Alfred.
I know why the caged bird sings!
Oh wait—
That’s what Maya knows.
Two roads diverged in a yellow wood.
I’ll take the road less traveled,
but only cause that’s what Robert said.
What’s left for me to write?
Thoughts swirl in my head,
and out through my pen.
Art has taken written form.
I know what I’ll write.
The world will love it.
I will love it.
And I’ll keep writing,
I’ll keep writing till the sidewalk ends—
Really, Shel?
You had to take that one too?
But no matter…
I’ll show you,
someday.
Nightingale74 Oct 2015
I broke your heart.
I made you cry…
Don’t you know that kills me?
In making my mistake, I hurt me
And I hurt you.
They say through your Mercy,
Your heavenly Grace,
Your sweet forgiveness,
I can be forgiven.
My nice white dress
Soaked in scarlet,
Bleeding crimson,
Can be clean again.
But how is that fair?
You died on the cross for me,
You let them drive crude cut nails
Into your gentle, loving hands.
With a crown of thorns upon your holy head,
They mocked you.
You cried in anguish,
“Take this cup from me…”
And bled from every pore.
I was up there watching.
Standing silently, doing nothing.
I watched you suffer for me.
I watched you pay for my failures,
My mistakes,
My weaknesses.
Why did you do that?
Because now, when it’s my turn to live,
My turn to suffer,
You don’t stand idly and watch me cry.
You hold my hand,
You dry my tears,
You give me strength.
Why?
Why have you done this for me?
You bled for me,
You cried for me,
You hurt for me.
Yet for my mistakes,
For the pain I’ve caused you,
All I can say is sorry?
“Sorry” can’t be enough…
Can it?
How can I walk away unscathed
While you bear my scars?
Nightingale74 Oct 2015
My heart beats in my chest,
Hovering in that state of in-between.
Not knowing whether to suit up for battle,
Or to brace myself for the break.
Is this dream worth the fight,
Should I give it my all,
No matter the risk?
Or is this a teaching trial?
Is this a time
To summon every scrap of strength I've got,
Or is it a time
To find the courage to say no?
Cause sometimes a true show of character,
Is not staying strong in the face of a battle,
But knowing when to wave the white flag
And walk away.
Nightingale74 Oct 2015
Who am I?
It seems like such a simple question,
And in all honesty, it is.
The challenge comes in answering it.
Because the answers come in layers
That must be unraveled
Like a ball of yarn.

Who am I?
In kindergarten we drew self portraits,
And we filled out worksheets
That told the world "All About Me."
My hair is blonde, my eyes are blue.
I like the colors red and gold,
And I love to eat chocolate.

Who am I?
As we got older, we developed hobbies.
"We are defined by what we do."
I like psychology, so I'm a nerd.
But challenge me to a riveting game of Clue,
And I'll read your mind and win the game.
So I guess being a nerd has its perks.

Who am I?
Well, I like to think that I'm a musician.
My fingers dance across keys of black and ivory,
And I smile as sweet harmonies
Fill the vacancies of the room.
I believe music is heard with the ears,
But felt with the soul.

Who am I?
I choose to be an optimist.
Because life is too short
To spend it without a smile.
I laugh at simple things
Because I love to laugh,
Simple as that.

Who am I?
I am a fighter.
I have struggles, just like the rest of humanity.
I'm not perfect, but I'm not a quitter either.

Who am I?
I'm a loving sister and a loyal friend.
Till the very end of time,
I will stand by the ones I love.
I believe in a God who believes in me.
He is my anchor, my light, and my friend.
In His strength, I CAN succeed.

Who am I?*
I am the person I choose to become.

— The End —