The dose of smoke I consume to lighten my soul, exits the lungs.
Feelings of sadness, regret. I am left unhappy from my decisions.
I am left opened up bleeding out, staining the concrete.
All I have is this negative introspection,
An “Idea”of self hate.
I want your soft sweet love.
I want my best friend back.
The ideas of our future playback endlessly, a constant buzzing ringing in my ears.
I focus on my darkest moment. I am forced to reflect on the pain I’ve caused the both of us.
******* I would give anything to talk. I would give my life to be with you again.
Everything reminds me of you.
You’re in my music, in my writing, in my food, in my stories.
I’m Losing all my emotions to “The Size of The Moon”.
We should forget these setbacks and get back moving again.
Because I know what I am afraid of;
I know that I am absolutely and utterly terrified of this being the end of the road.
That we reached the two paths in that yellow wood.
That I forced us to take separate roads of travel. I finally have learned, One decision makes all the difference.
Both roads are less traveled when we walk the alone.
Madeline Renee Tidwell you’re my everything and I will do anything I need to do to get better and fix this.