I plumped down sinking back first into the middle of the cushion.
Resting my arms behind my head.
Thoughts of spending the rest of my life here crossed my mind.
Now drifting off in thought.
I watched the sun drift off into the horizon.
Peering through half closed curtains. The inside of her eyes.
I always wondered what things looked like from here.
A beautiful thing, the clouds engulfed by one another.
Patiently laying there, feet spread apart. Wider than my shoulders.
The fear of drowning never crossed my mind, Sailing so far from I originally docked myself.
The closest I've ever came to setting sail before this moment was dangling my feet from the pier.
Hanging from the edge of her eyebrows.
By far one of the best memories happening before my eyes.
I loved how this felt. Surrounded in total comfort.
Embraced by nothing except cushion.
I sunk deep. My outer face cradled by cushion.
Watching the current of clouds ripple across the sky.
Snuggling my head deeper into the cushion.
Internalizing the thought of spending the rest of my life here.
Laying on the cushion of her heart.
Viewing the world through her eyes

I thought I told you about it;
The dream I had with eyes wide open.
I met this girl whom sparked a world of curiosity.
The way she stares, the sparklers that melt away in her eyes.
She traced the sky with them, her stare.
Little by little like the stem I was devoured;
Lost in conversation we ventured along the fringe of the sky.
An internal combustion of our hearts; black cats and roman candles shot into the air as flares,
Tumbling down, Cascading into a world of thought.
Venturing off into the smallest detail, not wanting this moment to end.
This vivid display captured under bright shades of red green and purple,
This implosion consisting of her and I.
This fragile yet explosive feeling shot into the sky in quick bursts of fireworks.
Zooming head first into infatuation .
Such liberty given with the touch of lips. tender, passionate.
I thought I told you how bright you've made everything

At times like this you scare me the most,
At times like this is when I seriously take into consideration the whole cup full, being half full theory.
At what point do I open the refrigerator,
At what point do I let the cup tilt over.
Yearning to sip every drip.
Every part of you that swirls around my taste buds.
Becoming less of me and more of you.
The sweet disaster of drinking out of an heart shaped straw.
Watching every moment pass through air bubbles of the straw, every bend. Every curve.
Dreading to hear the sound that echos all gone.
Realizing that at any point this could be the pivotal end of how we came to be.
With you there is no refill,
There is no running back to the store in manic rush.
No other brand of pop to replace that one perfect moment we met.
I'd rather drink you now rather than spend life wondering why the **** didn't I finish that drink

I waited in line,
Standing behind those in need.
Women, children.
Full carts, the other cashiers closed.
 
I stood in line,
Barely making it to the store.
Hurrying, grabbing what I sought.
Making it over to the line before it got longer.
 
I waited in line.
A deep thought, It never use to be so complicated.
Coming, grabbing what you needed.
Bypassing everything that compensates essential need.
 
I stood in line.
Barely making it to the store.
A different brand to replace something or another.
The P.A system announced the store now closed before I could buy a new heart

What is this perpetual sensation.
This marrow that feeds bone in natural detox
cleansing at first sight through throbbing hearts.
A state of euphoric action perceived by a smile.
A spectrum of different colors, coinciding with one another.
Depicted as spiritual from one eye to the next.
Though physical it remains mental,
Transpired from one soul to the next.
Retaining the knowledge of former self,
Yearning to experience the thought of someone else.
This occurrence of two hearts beating in unison.
The honesty of something so simple,
The after thought of things transpired, constantly relived.
There isn't anything subtle about this,
It is as it is without resentment.
Without guilt.
Considering the empathy of another, likes, dislikes.
Discovering the beauty of a selfless mind.
Spotless in nature,
Honestly following the footprints of a single thought,
Imploring understanding.
No longer selfish being associated in the trust of another,
A plump fruit, blossomed flourishing from chest to chest.
the taste of each others heart
Nourishing whatever ache, whatever pain
No longer existent

I seen heaven in a dream and like all good things
It ends to soon.
Eight hours narrowed down to short memory.
Lopsided sheets tucked comfortably in a discounted comforter.
Just before I waking up I heard a voice call my name.
A soothing voice layered in comfort.
Not once did I move. A place moist in anticipation.
Very rarely do I get to travel.
And good things come to end too soon.
The memory of smiling faces seen on a lukewarm day.
An older man sat at an iron wrought table.
Reading to himself the details of spaghetti and fork.
A slight twirl of long noodles punctuated by a piece of meat.
Next time I come I'll have to eat there.
By the open door with chalk on a board.

Going to sleep watching the food network definitely has it's consequences.

Being woke from one of the best dreams ever.
The sound of a rumbling stomach.
And an empty fridge

Not until steping closer.
I realized that I was in the palm of your hand.
I left my parachute without regret,
Moving one step closer staring down.
I deeply wanted to understand how free love was.
Standing here,
Realizing how high up everything really is.
Your palm sustaining my weight.
I wasn't at all anixous.
Now thinking that the wind could have shifted me forward before time.
Constantly aware that at any moment.
I will close my eyes and lean forward.
Pass the ridges of pants and tile floor.
Leaving behind everything I knew best.
My comfort zone.
This was me falling in love.
This was me overcoming my fear of heights
Forever in debt to the strength of your hand

And like a child
You have lifted me high above
With both hands.
I am weightless in my search,
Finding that my world revolves around you.
My every fear put to ease &
Like a child I am drawn to you without
a care in the world.
Finding that I am much taller, held up high in your arms.
My heart raising in unconditional love.
There is no fear when you are around.
I have put all my trust in you without realizing what trust is.
Your name most meaningful each time
it passes through my lips.
My eyes much wider, staring at you with such anticipation.
The way you pick me up when I am down
Without fear of falling

In a strange sort of way.
I've always wished that we've gotten together.
Be it a dream; that we would speak in hellos than good byes.
True love by means of evolvement.
Maybe I shouldn't think of you this way.
To bootleg myself in what I truly believe.
The hope of every possibility.
Your complex occupation.
To say what really matters.
To truly inspire in the midst of what we truly feel.
Consciously low key.
Eyes that take for granted that you'll always be there.
Maybe this is what I low key deserve.
Now knowing to be heard.
The difference between listen.
On another note.
I don't know.
I sort of always thought that would be fire.
To think of you as mine.
To hear the depth of truly knowing how free we are.
Our phones unlocked with complete sincerity, with us humbly mumbling somewhere in the background

Her love was like a molotov,
Spreading across everything it touched. manifesting into everything I'd ever know,
Devouring every bit of me in exciting fashion.
I became Drenched in this infatuation without warning,
Gasoline soaked clothes enticed by the flick of a lighter.
I found myself helpless in
this constant flame, grown out at every flicker,  its very touch.
Bright hues of red. Demanding full attention, her love.
I protested my profession in contempt, do I stay,
Do I lay flat and accept the spontaneity of each moment,
Slowly passing.
I held up my sign in an attempt to keep her from crossing the line. A plea of an mistaken cliché, not understanding everything she knew she wanted,
Still she fled towards me,
Leaving me helpless to every whim, every desire she offered.
I stood there lost in desire,
A simple decree of something I've never understood.
This incendiary combustion that took place out of nowhere.
The things said in utter silence,
The sound of who we once were shattering against the ground

I want to know what you see when you look at yourself in the mirror.
Especially on the bad days.
Even then, If you don't feel like getting out of bed.
I'll be your mirror.
Reciting everything I see when I stare back into you

In my mind we were but two halves.
Seeking nothing but the comfort of each other.
Without need for clothes we wore each other In the tightest embrace.
The simplest of things shared between us two.
No matter how much we tossed backward and forward
we remained together.
Discerned in ultimate truth, we sat still while everything else became
turbulent.
Tilting us backward and forward not once did any of us falter.
In my mind I loved her just as much as I loved myself.
Why shouldn't we be considered a whole.
Engulfing myself in her embrace as we sat.
Wrapping my arms around her jagged edges, protecting her just as she protected me.
Legs laid across my lap.
In the morning I'd kiss her forehead and welcome her further into my arms.
Grabbing her, pulling her tighter until you couldn't tell which one of us was which.

Her heart was like an Hershey's kiss
It's been quite a while since I've had a craving for such,
It's actually been quite a while since I've had one come to think of it.
I mean literally there are so many things that go on throughout the day
to actually sit down and realize hey the only thing missing right now is a bit of chocolate.
Unbecoming I was caught red handed. Attempting to take the last one out the bag.
It's not like I was a heathen or anything, giving the impression that I was to tear the paper off
shred by shred leaving her with nothing but the wrapper.
I would have shared in the manifestation of that one small thing becoming something greater.
She had something to be desired
She had something that I desired, something offered that I've never quite had
before.
Mouth watering in thought.
She presented a noteworthy question, one til this day I think we both know the answer to.
Only fitting after being overlooked so many times that it came natural
Giving pieces of herself wrapped up in this fancy tin foil only to be used.
Quite understable,
But she didn't understand this incredible urge that had to be filled

Queen, keep on the path that
Your on, for true revolution starts to manifest as we begin to transcend into purpose.
Not completely ignoring the reason behind it.
But its the growth that is essential to flourish into such things.
Which takes us from inside the box to outside the box and trains us to think differently.
Your melatonin is beautiful don't ever let anybody rob you of your inner beauty, the essence of your smile
For your crown is interwoven in your hair.
Where most would see this as a problem, they are from the outside looking in.
Every one looks at a picture
And ooo's and awes but never take the time to realize what makes that same piece of art definitive.
But that is what makes it Renasant.
Noone realizes that it makes your crown impossible to remove.
Pay no nevermind to those that sit and wonder how your crown reflects so much light.
No matter how overcast the day, continue to be proud that the sun always finds you and reminds you of how unique you are

Colors primarily exist knowing one specific hue,
Neutral in a sense, knowing nothing of the vivid expectation that exists outside of itself.
Then comes the brush revealing more than meets the eye.
Each bristle moist with enlightenment.
The innocence of a sudden touch brimming at the edge of comfort,
discussing need to further exploration.
This expectation which broadens the spectrum.
A social anxiety now left behind but still lives in fear.
This is where you come in,
The zest of something new.
Experiences otherwise thought about, yet never acted upon.
The distance between the colors are filled by the brush,
creating something totally new altogether.
Although the color is either brighter or darker,
The experience is still the same.
The intensity of longing for one another, no longer alone.
Peeping behind a glass curious about the what if's of curiosity.
Adding large detail to the picture painted on the grains of canvas
Expanding in contrast to which point of view is used to view the picture
But still lost in a nervous jitter of being lost in a feeling that's altogether brand new.
This broad spectrum of mixing colors to make something brand new.
Committing to the outside world for better or worse upon the criticism of dark hues that make shadows out of the light cast on one another.
This spectrum between you and I.
Whose color can be a favorite if we both dwell in delight,
The simple awe of one another, no longer viewing things as one sided
but in the broad spectrum for things provided by you

And like a stone I fell.
Nothing quite the same.
Knowing stillness, I paced myself.
Falling fast.
Head first.
The best thing I've known.
It's not so bad.
Falling.
The fear of crashing, crumbling into pieces.
This seems the way to go.
Missing the experience that brought fear to life.
Stubborn.
Like a stone.
These cobwebs thrown to the wind.
Finding each breath more desirable than the next.
A feeling that I've waited for.
Sitting still.
Like a rock.
Afraid to fly.
Until you came along.
Shattered into a million pieces.
The expectation of anything else.
Without need to hide your hand

What happened to the possibility of dreams.
The motivation of seeing you when I close my eyes.
Beginning to live the rest of my life, there with you.
A higher perspective of connecting on a higher plane.
A certain enlightenment that scatters all shadows back to dark.
This is the light that surrounds you while I close my eyes and dream of nothing but you

To be in love.
Her heart was a hill that I climbed with slippery soles.
To be still in the moments of encouragement.
I'd slide down unable to catch my footing.
I acknowledge that I wasn't dressed for the occasion.
Still persisting to climb.
To be in love.
The valley of dream & hope.
I tied my shoes tighter.
My hands filled with grit and grass.
No matter how hard I tried I constantly slid down.
The sky a beautiful mix of orange and blue.
Her love was a sight I longed to see.
The meadow to low to catch the best view.
Everything she has to offer.
I tossed through mud and dirt.
Learning patience in every attempt, the closer I got.
She'd open her arms wide.
And each time I'll fall face first.
Still determined I didn't cease to stop.
I spent a lot of time there.
Lost in a valley of fog.
To afraid to ask for help.
Scared that my secret valley would no longer be my own.
That everything serene.
Everything that I loved would be modernized, torn apart piece by piece.
No matter how many times I slip.
No matter how many times I fall.
I love everything ,
Still persisting to climb.
Learning patience with each step

And like that, the sound of fireworks plunged into the sky.
We were adults left pretending as kids.
Watching the fireworks highlight the essence of each others face.
Each explosion substituted the throb of patient hearts

The jitter of anticipation now immanent
Highlighting our face a different array of colors.
Subtle, the light flashed against our face, a blossoming rose bud flourishing
in bright flash.
Each smile distinguished in the aroma of our heart displayed in the sky.
Soon disappearing into shadow of the night.
And we, forever etched in a memory.
In hindsight, our hearts had a blast.
Reaching up high then falling back to the ground

I was caught off guard by the everlasting effect of your smile.
In all honesty I thought I was prepared for the well placed explosion that took place in my heart.
In actuality, I was not.
Absent minded to the total embodiment that was you.
The coming of your lips,
The taste of your stare.
I did not know the effect your voice would have on me.
There wasn't a prayer that could have prepared me for you.
There was nothing left of what my heart use to be.
The occurrence of everything obliterated; Emptied.
The horizon filled by your silhouette; my hands lost in the light cast
by the radiance of your smile.
I was reduced to nothingness in the blink of an eye by a single look cast from
The stare of your eye.
The total sound of nothingness filled my heart with a peaceful hush
after the destruction you've caused with just a single look.

His flower blooms in the wind,
Blossoming each direction the wind blows.
Gracefully tucked in the curled petals of self love, Her love.
His flower is innocent, Her petals lingering with the aroma of her lips.
Devoured by the breeze that swoops pass. Engulfed in passion,
His flower. Her love. Her lips.
His flower exuberantly intellectual.
Her stem a temple of spiritual delight, the way she sways, his flower.
Her leaflets drenched with infatuation, Her love is mute.
A bold splash of violet that speaks louder than any word.
There isn't a perfume sweeter than her fragrance.
The bees that loom around in circles, inebriated from such intoxication.
They fall short of her love, Her lips, his flower.
The thought of her lingers.
Humbling itself at will, he submits to her, his flower.
Mesmerized by such beauty, gentle, soothing.
He longs to be the water his flower needs to grow.
Her love

Sometimes all that is needed is a caress to fill the void of an endless empty feeling.
One that words on the other hand cannot mend.
The reassurance of head to chest, to feel the essence of an woman
living and breathing in his hands.
Though she is not the cause of the many things that run throughout his mind.
It is this silent bond that assures that everything is alright.
The steady calm of her heart pulsating against his ear to calm his own heart.
Just a moment to breathe in the same air as she does, the pause of a fast moving
heart finally laying it's head down to rest.
Bent bodies at ease, deep down I think she knows; the dreams the heart refuses to let go. Finding light in the shadows of melancholy
The cross guard that waves her hand at pleasant dreams.
This everlasting desire to be loved more grows with every look of her eyes.
He wouldn't ask her for anything that he himself is not willing to give in return.
Any and everything to meet this desire that beats with every breath that excavates deeper into his lungs.
The nature of man to woman, to love one another in perfect imperfection.
Misunderstandings of each others action soothed by the touch of each other's caress.
The sharing of arms clung to each others tight.
Deep down I think she knows, the nightmares that end soon as her voice echoes through her lips.
The reflection of one another's eyes looking back at them.
Eased forward in the recliner of her grasp.
Just one of the amazing gifts she shares, the comfort of herself.
A guarantee of safe passage to feet that often stumble.
He only hopes she understands; holding on to her for dear life
Afraid that she would slip from his grasp
Knowing to her that all of his imperfections are perfect in her eyes
Falling asleep to the calmness that lulls inside of her chest

You've crossed my mind many nights.
Sometimes I just lay there, holding you tight in mind.
Wandering your body with my hands.
Filling my fingers with the skin I've dreamt so much about.
The things you keep hidden. unraveled in empty sheets, blankets.
Your warmth becoming the only comforter that dictates whether or not I'll have sweet dreams.
What justifies the stain our breath has left on one another's.
The press of your face against my neck.
The marks left on each other in anticipation. Refusing to pull ourselves away.
Clinging tight to the ****** of being beside ourselves.
Deliberately keeping each other awake in the promise of sleeping wild moments later.
To watch your face scrunch up as it breaks your gasp. Bringing a halt to anticipation,
The comfort of bodies becoming pillows harboring us into a deep sleep. Soft, still.
My head laying on your shoulder.
As we ourselves become lost in the sheets

When I am around you,
I feel heavy.
Everything that normally bothers me
isn't a concern anymore.
Not that it's not there,
it just softens
a whole lot.
In fact, everything softens
when I am around you.

In time, even blankets can warm
the coldest of beds,
and that's what you are to me;
a blanket so thick,
you just fall into it and sink,
You drape across me.
Your breath filling the air of my ears,
warm, soft
one of the best blankets I've been
wrapped up in my whole life.

After a few minutes, I am asleep
inside you.
My bones, my worries,
everything fades away.
Your warmth, my everything

It was never my intention to leave you standing outside.
I never heard a knock on the door, an unintentional contradiction of the welcome mat beneath anxious feet.
Though small, the hall extends to a larger room. Surrounded by two more rooms across from each other. Fair in size.
Prints of bare feet seep through thin socks;
The sharpness of your gaze. Cluttered in thought.
Remnants of the last place you stood.
Admiring now replaced siding.
The last time your back pressed against the side of the house, broken promises chipped off.
Weathered.
Nails pulled out and replaced with screws. An extra layer of tar paper.
You promised you'd return but never came back,
The decor of your essence repainted with a light tan, border still to be sanded down and nailed against fresh paint.
Moving from the room at the end of the hall,
Walking toward the front door then forgetting what I was going to do

I fell in love by the shore.
Nose wide open.
In a cool curve I felt a ripple of bliss.
Through my eyes I followed every motion.
Every gleam that shown through vibrant hue.
The echo of true loves kiss.
Like that I became hooked.
A sharp pain coming from my jaw.
To be pulled in a direction that wasn't my own.
I panicked.
The more I fought, the stronger the pull got.
My jaw stung with every tug.
I was at a loss for words.
Finding it hard to breathe.
Each gasp deeper than the next.
I was lured by the same shore I loved from afar.
The bitter pinch I believed to be love at first sight.
No longer able to breathe.

In the waiting room
The broken clock sits

And it was one of those kind of days.
Enjoyment of the little things.
She filled both my hands.
My mind at ease,
She was very good at stuff like that.
Warm to the touch, my hands snug around her.
The way she smelled was life itself.
Flooding my nose with endless memory.
Deliciously swirled & tasted.
My insides fluttering in thought.
No longer empty but filled by anticipation.
This was the kind of weather she was made for.
Jeans, sweaters.
Lazy days to throw any old thing on and lounge around.
It was one of those kind of days she filled my mug,
My hands with hot chocolate.
Her being the very chocolate that warmed my soul

Of all things
Just because

I felt so alone.
every place I went. every place I stopped to visit.
Seemed off.
I followed the noise of everything around me
in the hope of finding something familiar.
I rounded corners, crossed mazes of streets.
I didn't feel like I belonged to any of these places.
mostly filled with strange looks. anxious behavior.
still, I walked.
big city life is too busy.
always somewhere to be. always something to do.
it's easy to lose track of time.
keeping up with the next thing to do, the next place to be.
I felt so alone.
my walk becoming more unease. my shoulders more tense.
nothing really felt warm.
everyone felt cold, lost in the hustle of busy feet.
Shoulders almost bumping into each other,
Cars screeching their horn almost running into the other.
the sanctuary of what I really needed seemed far away.
still, I walked.
meeting the avenue of your eyes. you.
you seemed different.
far different than any place I’ve been.
I felt like I’ve been here before, or at least
Would remember if I’ve dreamed about it.
I didn't need to look at a menu to know what I wanted.
there wasn't a question of where I’d sit, or if there'd be
a seat by the window.
No remembering if I needed to stop at an ATM or if I had the right
Amount of money. I felt at ease.
I immediately knew what I wanted and where I wanted to be.
if I did continue to walk, it would be into tomorrow.
so that I could come back here.
a patron whose face would take no time to remember.
when the weeks turn into years.
I’ll remember to tell you; this is how I got home

I smell the wild on you.
How the snow is caked in your fur.
When the night falls, what does
It offer besides survival.
And the means to be something
besides human.
We're stuck here somewhere where
The earth has broken.
And the cold envelopes everything it
Touches.
You stand there in the snow
Teeth bared.
Not afraid to go at it once more.
I've grown tired, so very tired.
Your eyes burn the snow.
That fierce longing to stay alive.
What else does the night offer,
We've consumed pretty much
everything else except each other.
And I am tired of fighting.
Nothing pretty survives out here alone,
In the dark.
Together, you and I nestled in each other's warm.
When hunger subsides.
We'll find it in each other

My ideal love is a love that catches me by surprise.
The realization of intelligent things and conversations that literally take us anywhere.
My ideal love is a love that expresses ideal.
The ramifications that influence us to be who we really are in front of who we are.
A love that doesn't mind bargin shopping and putting together hundred dollar outfits that really cost $10.
The reality that its the most simplest of things that are most significant.
A spontaneous love that doesn't mind the predictability of living today before exploring the mystery of tomorrow.
Here after the after thought that we exist in the past as well as the present simultaneously.
If ever in need I'll do my best to provide all that I can for an ideal love.
Through these actions I believe the true miracle is achieved.
An ideal love that is beyond ideal.
Who sets the where and how we meet, the institutions of bliss where the masses are limited to love and longing.
To find patience and compassion sitting on the front lawn on the same institution.
As long as she provides a kiss that can send me outside of my own thoughts, and pull me closer to hers.
My ideal love wouldn't be based on a B.E.T movie.
A single expression that summarizes a scorned woman letting go.
A cliff note of lust soon as the next sceen fades to black.
Her ******* pulled down not knowing the dude is secretly abusive.
140 minutes gone by to realize the last 5 mins were the ones that made her truly happy.
The woes of love.
My ideal love is a woman built with ambition but with a heart big enough to understand that without sacrifice nothing is truly accomplished.
A culture made in truth, ripped off by those who ignore that struggle is what makes us who we are.
The courage to walk out in front and be who we really are.
A real woman that doesn't mind lounging around the house that knows whom Budda and Huey Newton was.
This revolution of ideal starts the moment I realize that I never stood a chance.
The surprise of her lips against my cheek.
I drink from this remedy each time you open your lips.
So in silence I gasp.
As you caught me off guard,
My ideal love

For a moment we’re in perfect harmony.
There is no fear. No worry.
Finding purpose in each other.
Whether the shadows creep through the night.
Or the sun lives out loud during the day.
There is but a moment
Followed by an embrace, then a click.


Unlocking parts of you that I only anticipate.
Though circumstances may vary.
This moment I relive, even away from you.
The way that you sigh, the way that you
Twist and the way that you turn.
No matter where I’ve been.
You tumble then you click for all to hear.


A sigh released into forever.
Echoing down its hallway.
No matter how tight you squeeze.
I am here.
No matter how stubborn you may become.
I am here.
Until the day I no longer exist.


No matter how many hands I may pass through.
I can never replace the way that you hold me.

If you could be anything I'd like you to be an ice cream sundae.
Layered to perfection.
A picture perfect representation of how I see you.
Extra fudge drenched from each edge of the bowl.
Scandalous, the way you'd lay.
Extra cherries sitting on top of your head.
How devilishly **** that would be.
Inviting ourselves to be selfish with no end to how many
spoonfuls we'd take of each other.
Quenching need with melted thirst.
Devoured in everlasting bliss.
The lips that long to taste every inch of you.
Until the bowl is no more

I smeared myself against your bottom lip,
To feel the same warmth
That rests at the caress of
Your lip.
Each breath a breeze,
I myself, resting in the hammock your lips make.
If you sigh I have no fear of being blown away.
Knowing that I've reached the peak of where I've climaxed most.
I don't mind if you bite down.
Being caught between your bottom lip and the top of your grin.
If I could lay here for a while longer,
Caught in the explosion between us two.
The way I've smeared myself far from subtle.
Drowned in the corner of your mouth.

Your lips the softest pillow
I could rest my head.
Your lips the softest kiss I could drown

With the millions and trillions of sparks that light the night sky.
I sat and wished upon the brightest one I saw.
Not once did I think that it would stop in mid flight.
Not once did I think anything planetary would listen to something so small.
A prayer sincere in meaning.
Two physical beings connecting on a spiritual plane.
The manifestation of deep longing burning bright in the night sky.
The law of attraction causing mass commotion against the other stars.
A nervous jitter becoming a representative of deep stares, the connection of eyes.
Watching you hover close to me. Revealing how big you truly are.
The one spark that refused the rest of the match stick, burning for all eternity.
A curious question, would you accept me as I am.
The slightest touch of hearts orbiting a single thought that leads to many.
A rendezvous of hearts missing something unforgettable.
The compilation of stars appearing smaller the close you get.
Arms stretching wider welcoming your embrace.
A huge space rock chipped off along the edges.
In comparison I would be a pebble filling the crater that needed it most.
A fragile thing. Giving ones self to something in belief of fulfillment.
The height of tides now risen to the soles of my shoes. Inching closer to my knees.
In all honesty,
I'll drown in you forever if it means I'll never get this close to you again.

If I could be anything
I'd be your pillow.
To grant you comfort in the times you need rest.
To truly understand you
To listen to all of your secrets.
And stay up with you all night
To comfort you.
And reassure you that you are beautiful,
In every single way.
To catch your every grin
Every fall of your tear.
The last time I saw you
You grabbed me so tight
I didn't want you to let go.
The feel of your nails dug in my back.
Whether your hair is freshly done,
Whether you tie it in a ponytail,
Whether you tie it up or wear a bonnet.
I welcome you just the same.
Lay your head on me and just relax.
Frankly, I wouldn't trade anything for that moment
As I find so much comfort in listening to you speak. I've always have.
We were lost in every conversation
That came to mind. Watching the rain drip down the window.
Though you feel that your rambling at times, I think no such thing.
I love hearing about the things that cross your mind.
Your thoughts
Your ideas.
Let your imagination run wild.
Tell me every detail.
I love how you are so fearless in your endeavors.
Your determination
Your commitment, passion.
You inspire me in an way I never thought possible.
To grant you comfort,
By any means necessary
As your pillow

If my next breath happened to be my last,
I'd want your voice to be the last I'd ever hear.
Revealing just how much I thought of you.
A belief that my single purpose for living was you.
This emphasis of religion that is built on devotion .
Far more importantly that I've lived not only myself.
Giving up everything material .
This spiritual purpose that has become more than a mental sensibility .
If heaven was truly found on earth, I'd repent only to hear your voice one last time

when I think about you
I hold you close and place you
around my neck like a necklace.
somewhere where I know that you're safe.
somewhere that I don't have to question.
your lips a pendant to the charms
that bang against my chest if I were to run.
the chain of your arms looped around my neck.
not to bind, or to keep stagnant.
to take in the sights, to breathe as one,
just as the planets that clasp together,
dangling from the universe's neck.
and
how the stars gleam and radiate.
bouncing and filling the empty gaps of space.
astronauts know this for a fact.
nestled in the comfort of their ships, sailing the sky.
clutching their keepsakes.
thinking about the love they've left back home.
although I am far from an astronaut.
you guide me through some of my darkest times.
when I think about you
I hold you close and place you
around my neck like a necklace.
if ever I am lost, you center me

I don't want to drink again
No, not from those lips
That tiny bottle of pending doom with little tiny labels marked warning.
Under the table, grabbing walls
Compensation for the shot glass full of stained breath
There is no amount of emotional comfort that doesn't lead to physical contact.
My lips; your essence
There isn't a support group that can teach that
The urge to resist the glare of the bottle
Simple steps that lead to complete disaster
The calling of your name
The way you splash against my lips.
I don't want to drink again
My bad habit
My secret craving
A distinct hint that I need you again.
Where's pride in this infatuation
The need to have you again
This uncontrollable substance
Marked with warning labels
Bottled emotion that seeps at anytime.
The need of not caring who's around.
Again, pride where are you

Then I realized my mistake.
I searched the world not realizing that the world I longed existed inside of you.
Wherefore I felt I needed some sort of permission.
Some sort of console.
Instead of accepting the card I knew hid face down in a deck of the same face cards.
I manipulated the cards to what I knew best.
The only thing I felt was real.
The inevitable.
I was the veil whom dangled in wait.
The classic a-ha moment when all would be revealed.
Not realizing that I myself was a part of the illusion.
The one I kept at arms reach.
A realm filled with room upon room of smoke and mirrors.
Face down on top of a hat.
Waiting for some sort of hand to reach down and pull me toward what I already knew.
I was stuck in an illusion

Her eyes widened,
Not once did I stop to notice that this was the first time
These words came from my mouth.
Through action yes but never once did I stop to pay attention that I've never said it before.
The words that caused this sudden hesitation.
I mean throughout the course of the day I've thought it.
But until I seen the look on her face it struck me.
Of all things how could I possibly forget that.
It wasn't at all a bad thing, as most silences accompany something bad,
Though silence filled the air the look on her face was in disbelief.
From that moment on I sort of questioned a lot of other things, the kind of things that lead to if I did or didn't.
I never was one to pay close attention to detail.
The subtle hints that I very well might have overlooked.
I suppose I do deserve to be hit in the back of the head
As she stopped in mid sentence, I suppose just as shocked as I was.
In the back of my mind I was really hoping that she wouldn't ball up her fist and hit me up side the head.
All things aside, I was never good at this type of thing and on a daily basis she deserves more than what I can give but she takes it all in stride.
But seriously I hope she doesn't hit me up side the head for taking this long.
She is a bit violent and on top of that she is a ******, going to get a step stool would only make her madder.
Her eyes now widened, eyebrows relived of any crinkle that stretched down to her nose.
Leaving me without a thing to say but the words again.
"I love you"

And Like that.
I had this overwhelming urge.
I don't know what came over me.
I asked God is this the route I should take.
This habit of association.
To **** out what may seem to be selfish.
Time is of the essence.
This illusion of what is definite or what may not be.
Certainly this proclamation arrived out of nowhere.
Again I asked.
Notating my lack of patience.
I found the choir of mind without direction.
They stood and hummed.
Some in que.
Others were all over the place.
Without a podium or overreaction to the problem.

Amen, acknowledging your grace.
This aura highlighting sudden fixation.
I sought guidence.
Leaving the trail Whince I came.
I felt pain in my rib.
A spiritual curriculum decided by what's missing.
Again I asked.
More left to the imagination
A reiteration of urge.
The potency of silence.
Engaged by a look.
I understood what the choir was saying

One of the worst things I could have done
Is blame you for all of the things you couldn't have known.
Instead of telling you I always figured that you've known all of these things.
Forgetting that you too, are human.
Putting on this front that we aren't as vulnerable as we seem.
Knowing all of the things that I keep from you.
I realized my mistake only when it was too late.
Revealing to you all the things that I thought you knew.
The things you couldn't have known.
How your name drives me insane soon as I hear it.
Staring across from you embracing every moment.
These things not often said not knowing how you'd react.
If you'd really see how important you are
One of the worse things I could have done.
Separating these same feelings in the blink of an eye.
Not knowing if you truly felt the same as I.
Twisting myself in half not realizing how whole you made me.
Instead of telling you I always figured that you've known all of these things.
I love the way you look at me.
The nonchalant way you'd often speak.
Putting on this front that we aren't as vulnerable as we seem.
How I crumble at the chance I didn't pull you closer.
Too few gaps left to fill.
Instead of telling you I always figured that you've known all of these things.
All of the things I wanted to do.
All of the things I wanted to say.
The weight of cookies that sit on a shelf.
Often suffocate while no one watches
Never knowing the feeling of being in love.
They often crumble

In monumental testament.
I grabbed a bottle and began to fill it with notes.
In times where reassurance was needed most I replaced the contains of the bottle with thoughts.
Unable to speak in a time where actions proved to speak louder.
Hesitant eyes that waited for reply. Drawing a blank where silence seemed ideal.
On one of the notes I drew a ship on the front and back of it. Sliding it in the middle of the bottle.
Shaking the bottle up and down, I watched it shift back and forth in wave after wave of loose strips of paper.
Rough torn edges, uneven chunks of paper.
Considering myself human for the most part. Taking a minute to walk across the shore.
Watching a ship sail it's maiden voyage.
Blue lines, the smell of paper.
The sound of waves crashing against the sides of the ship.
Sitting down along the side of the shore. Watching a ship caught in a storm of paper.
Reassuringly gathering my thoughts.
The ship drawn perfectly, setting sail across the depth of the bottle.
Leaned upright, splashing down on one note or another.
Following my first mind I sat the bottle on a stack of books.
I still wasn't ready to talk

I've often thought of guitar lessons
Learning the strings to your heart.
To pluck away for hours on in
Learning your gentle curve.
Your inner most thoughts, desires.
An ecstasy that fills the air,
That first takes place with beating hearts.
The first sound that changes lives.
The sound of how deeply I've fallen for you.
Plucking away insecurity after insecurity,
An emotion sincerely felt
Caught in your sultry moan over & over again.
You laid in my arms, in a caress that makes life more beautiful .
Through extension, how much a single moment can mean.
Discovering the best feeling when you stare back at me,
Cradled in my arms.
An undying language no one can take from you or I.
Our loudness the things we've always wanted to say.
Our loudness a passion that makes my heart tap.
Learning the strings to your heart.

In the lapse of a minute, before that same minute revolves into two.
A kiss swoons in the embrace of passion.
A daydream of eternity.
Being lost in a single minute.
Heads tilt in comfort, bringing the ease of comfort.
Eyes no longer weary in the caress of cheeks.
The rapid beating of hearts blossoming from a bud into full bloom.
In the lapse of seconds that leap head first into eternity

To my nose she was a stick of incense.
Filling me whole, her eyes.
The ashes fell,
Spacing her walk.
With smoke closely trailing.
The sun quickly set.
There's no where in the world I'd rather be.
An empty room filled by you.
A hint of spice mixed with something sweet.
The steadiness of warmth no matter day or night.
To relax and fall into deep sleep.
The smoke dancing through my dreams
In wait to be lit again

Whenever you speak
I listen carefully.
Finding much needed serenity.
Placing myself in our every private conversation.
The way you could read my mind.
Your voice a familiar place in my ear.
Those full brown eyes that stare off in a dream.
Sometimes I wonder what's on your mind.
My wish to hug you as hard as I can.
Your chest against mine, eyes closed in comfort.
When you speak I am in ultimate comfort.
This comfort of just being around you.
All the little things I've missed so much.
Inches away from my nose.
The times we've shared.
The touch of your lips,
The smile of seeing your face.
Bursting into laughter.
Most of the time you keep quiet.
And that's understandable,
Those full brown eyes caught in a dream.
When you do speak.
Every word becomes that much more precious.
I listen intently,
Knowing just inches from my nose.
Is the result of a dream I've had quite often

Suddenly it does.

This rapid thing that ticks and tocks.

Look up and it's gone

I suppose the best part of it all
Was that I fell out of my shoes.
Where most would be embarrassed.
In a strange twist I felt a calm peace.
I had nothing to hide,
Outside of the fact that I was falling.
Fall fast I did.
The most beautiful of facts, pleasing to the ear drum of desire.
The harmony of her kicking my chair.
Me falling flat against the ground.
A beautiful sound echoes about in memory.
A short in-flight movie of me falling back into one of the biggest smiles I've ever seen.
House shoes flying through the air.
I assume that I wasted too much time.
So she took matters into her own hand.
Well foot at least.
My inspiration