My psychiatrist told me to
Paint him a picture
Of a better future.

So I said:

“Give me the ability to discern the truths
In my heart from the lies in my mind.”

Only then can there be progress.

i'm not okay.
i'm not okay.
i'm not okay.
i'm not okay.
i'm not okay.


you've stolen my heart
and i've forgotten how to breathe.

Daggers dance amongst the valleys.
Shadows plague troubled waters.
Reflections dim as tantalizing wildflowers sing.

I shut them out and drowned myself in troubled waters—
Swift visions succumbed to darkness.
Parallels fall like dominos, crashing into the infinite ground.

Sunshine wasted as I step further into the valley.
Away from hands that feed me.
Aimlessly wondering into the abyss.

What a beautiful paradise lost—
As I take my final breath.

i froze my tears
just in case I might need
them again
in case you decide
to light another fire
with your lies.

this is the paradox
of me and you.
like water & oil
we forced ourselves to mix.
but instead we just floated
on top of one another.

I'm not sure if you're addicted
to my sadness
or if I've gotten used to
the silence that creeps
between us while we sleep
but there's something
peculiar about
the way you
breathe.

it's enticing
so intoxicating
that I don't mind crying
next to you
for a little while longer.

why do i keep giving away pieces

of my heart to people who don't deserve them?

They say warning comes before
Destruction but I walk with Destruction.
Destruction comforts every fiber of my
being, ******* me into the black whole
of repressed memories but
I cannot escape these haunting premonitions.

i don't expect you to mend my soul overnight
but i do ask that you
treat my heart with careful consideration
because i don't think i can handle
another tear.

all i ask is that
you proceed with caution
and mend my heart.
one day at a time.

Does the sun miss the moon
When it’s sleeping?
Does the hand miss the thread?
When it’s no longer spinning?

Is the child no longer?
Dependent on its mother
even after he or she
reaches adulthood?

Is a clock is still a clock
Even when it’s not ticking?

So tell me how could I
Possibly miss the chance
To dance with my first love
for the rest of my days.

my soul burns from these
heavy burdens i've been carrying
but when i look into your eyes
all i see is repentance.
god forbid i'm buried
before i release the ghosts
of my past.

I am not a human being.
I’m an angel waiting for my Father to return.
Therefore, you cannot compare my earthly body to my spiritual body
For my earthly body shall decay,
but my spiritual body shall live on for all eternity.

Once upon a time

I thought you were everything

I needed but now I realize

You were the thing dragging me down

So I pulled the ripcord

And watched you drift away.

One button, two voices.
Which one do I follow?
Wounds opened with steel, I have two choices.
But what surrounds is sorrow.

Panic ensues as tantalizing birds sing-
"Into the abyss, you go"
Paralyzed within the ******* of their wings,
I know there will never be another tomorrow.

What's done is done-
It was a good run.

i smiled as my final tear
stained the concrete
then i pulled the trigger
and the world went dark.

i drowned myself in

sin and waited for

god to come to the rescue.

Sometimes cutting is
Easier than pretending
I’m not hurting.
Sometimes cutting is easier
Than saying I’m  okay
When I’m  really dying
On the inside.

Sometimes cutting will
lead to a decision I
Can’t take back.

save me.

you've stained my glass with
your tears but I don't mind
because you've created a masterpiece
that I will carry with me to the end of time

the stars light up when you smile
but now the stars have now burned out because you chose to leave your life without saying goodbye to those who loved you.

You should’ve realized that stare go dim when you’re not around.

Well, they certainly do for me.

she listened to the static of the television
hoping it would fill the void of what he left behind.

stay close to people who feel like sunlight
and run away from those who feel like the moon.

Sunkissed
\
and
Unashamed
Our broken hearts
Still beating
As we danced through the fields
And watched
The sun kiss our skin
Before the moon took
Her turn.
/
Covering us in our own
nakedness
\
And vulnerability
/
And we saw each other’s
Scars within the moon’s enduring
\
Wrath
/
And we laid there
\
Enjoying every
/
Moment.

I wonder what it would be like to die for ten minutes.
for ten minutes, to be at peace.
to be free from the chaos.
for ten minutes, I wonder what I would miss in life
wondering if anyone would even care if
I was gone.

for ten minutes.

i am so thankful
God took the time
to carve your delicate
hand into mine
so that we may unite
as one at the altar.

The problem with playing wolf is
they’ll never believe you till it’s over.
Tired of hearing her own empty words and promises.
She turned off the lights.

I watched you water my petals
Soaking my roots with your love
But then the drought came
And you left me thirsty.

My petals wilting away
From your abandonment.
And I watched as my soul died
In the lonely drought.

i can still taste the cherry cola
on your lips as we shared
our final moment staring at
the moon waiting for the
angels to descend and take you away.

In a stranger’s bed, she finds warmth

Yet she still feels cold.

Her body a temple for the devil

To carve his initials.

Tear-stained pillows and ***-soaked sheets

Became the cornerstone of her identity.  

As the Devil continues his invade.

In a stranger’s bed, she finds acceptance,

Yet she still feels rejection.

Her mind a playground for the Devil’s adversaries

To take her heart.


Yet she cherishes those mornings

As if they were her last.

your tears are like
the most expensive perfume
known to man.
and i cannot get enough.

please cry on my shoulders
and let me bask myself in
your glorious scent
for all eternity.