An explosion. It made no sense at first. But with time made me feel better. Hard to believe as it came out of nowhere. I clenched at my heart unsure. With maybe mild to equitable mental activity. It was never meant to be forevermore, you said. Old stories, been there done that, it's of the past. There wasn't any common sense, we were intoxicated, agitated, hung over, stripped and lost. In exasperation though, there was a kiss. One that became emotional and heavier with time. My mind went trip, slip, and collapse. Honestly? Here I was, minding my own selfless persona. And you come along with pale cheeks, bare tears and red eyes. Surrounding me with a kiss, and leaving me in a dream. Sigh.

Near light improvised music
Under a moon so gray
Tomorrow's song
Sings of an evening
Pocketed in the dark
Absorbing us
Breathing us
Feeling us
Pulling us away
And we but following
Our usual routine
Lose track and thought
Of our words and hearts
Lose track and thought
Of our sight and light
Lose track and thought
Of our love,
And we simply
Reminisce.

Shining star
Shining oh so high
Take me far
Take me tonight
Times up
I'm lost in thought
I need a smoke
Oh ****...
I lost my pipe.

She, masking the lies from within
Hiding around as air so thin
Bathed, my skin in her scent
Broken, our lives, we cannot win
Sin, we have anguished deep inside
Far along from our hearts and mind
Darkness comes, it rises, surrounds
My life a lie, a truth u cannot find
So mask me now, mask me more
The lies they come, the lies they don't go
But whatever happens forever we will be
As I yearn for you, more then I do for me.

Soft kiss,
Luster whines
Pretty friend,
I wanna make you mine
Teddy's and cherries,
Cut the line
Search the night,
Turn of the light
Magical girl,
Be mine.

I, queen of frost
Shall freeze your thwarted heart
As the blood in your veins comes to a low
I, queen of blood
shall have you bleed through night and day
As the warmth within you soon stops and stays

Together
We give birth
To one of frost and blood
One who shall live forever
for she the immortal queen
One who controls the mortals
One who tames natures beasts

Her existence recorded as one of life and death
For she is the queen that shall freeze and leach
For she the queen born of haem and glacé
For she the queen of frost and blood

This moon
Like a reflection
Displaying
What is supposedly
My better self
For with it’s
Every crescent
I become more of something
I wish to be
Yet it doesn't last
For with its
Every shrink
I come to feel as if something
Were dying inside of me.

I am beauty, as a dream of jade
And my body, bruised where everyone stands
Has now been awakened by poetry, in a manner of love
That is eternal but silent

It is like a temple of earth
Along which columns of clay gush out
Which observes us, and all of man through an unfamiliar gaze

Never have I laughed, never have I cried
For I detest the flow of such emotion
All I do is but stand still, silent as a cemetery
Unblessed, cursed, revered by all of man

If, when I wake up tomorrow, eyes open, eyes wide
Unable to remember who I am,
Forgetting all I know, unable to remember at all
Who you were or what you were to me
Then a single wish is all I ask
With my eyes deep red, tearing away
As I beg myself not to fall asleep
That please oh please
Don't let me fade away.

My languid darling,
With your videre as you pass by
Pausing, freezing, looking back at me
Through harmonical movements
That made it seem as if you were dancing
Turning here and there ambivalently
Trying to ease your own boredom
As you listen to the sound of music.

Roses are red
Violets are blue
Your soul withers away
As mine does too
The moon cries
Under the endless night
And falls down
Under a painted sky
Forests were burnt
The snows painted red
Her cheeks blushed peach
As she was pale and cold
With no more room
In her arms anymore
For dark as it was
Under this starry night
She was dead and lost from sight.

Emotions run through my head
And I find myself wishing I was dead
All because we were moving away
Different places in different ways
Sorrow and despair, they shine right through
Making way for something completely new
and so here’s to goodbye
The saddest long lullaby
Forgotten by most
For it is the hardest to say
And we knew this would never last anyway

So now in my head, so deep and so loud
The ringing of bells and the screaming of crowds
Its just one word yet brings out alot
Goodbye, au revoir, its time.
Ciao

Days went by as she screamed in her sleep
She whined and cried like a fetus so weak
Her mind was scattered and bruised by the pain
And all I could do was lay beside her
Unable to share any of it in vain

Until late one night she lay silent in bed
With a smile so soft, without a tear in place
With soft words so subtle, and a voice so sweet
She raised her head slightly and whispered quietly to me
“Good night, son” and fell silent in sleep.
I for once, was finally at peace
And so with a quick sigh of relief soon too fell asleep
But it wasn't till late next day, when I woke up
That I found myself sitting next to her, cold as ice
Her face was pale, her body had gone stiff
It was then it had hit me, that now forever she was gone
It was then that I realized it is forever she has slept.

I cried and wept that day like never before
Frozen like her, paralyzed, unable to move no more.

The old and strong
Do not wither
They stand tall and fast
High and mighty above the rest
Their roots are deep
And cannot be severed with ease
Yet if you try
And god forbid
that you do succeed
A loneliness
A sense of guilt
Will push and pelt at you very soul
Simply, a certain darkness
Will cloud your heart
Leaving you to wander
Lost,
Haunted by your past mistakes
Knowing that not even
A good nights sleep
Could save you.

You grew like spores
In the cracks of my skin
So fast, so strong
You carved your roots
Directly into me
Making it almost
Impossible
To get rid of you
Without having me
Break myself too…

She was tiny,
Almost half my size.
I was worried, always
That maybe if I touched her
She might just break
Fall to dust.
But she was strong
Alot stronger then she seemed.

I was simply foolish.
Scared, worried, afraid
Of losing her? I don’t know?
Maybe.
I had rough edges and she had scars
But she held them with pride
Showing that she survived,
And she simply drilled a hole
Right into my heart
Nestling in,
With bitter sweet love
Helping my soul to mend

I even though not a god,
Wanted to save a young damsel in distress
As she tread slow and silent
Clouding the sound of her footsteps
As she made her way from a forest
With a gentle lunacy
With a brutal yet true wisdom
Darkening the day,
I foolishly grab hold of the girl
Under a precarious moonlight
Cleaving the silence
Destroying the gods will
Setting a series of uncertainty and idiocy into play
She smiles, her gaze shifts
From gentle to stark Grimm
And I saw within overlaid wreaths
An imbued spirit with the name
“PAIN”
Ringing cries unknown, petrifying me in fear

You were a demon, a monster
One I had set free
You grew wings and scales
You grew bigger and bigger, with every lost cry
Your eyes blazed like the sun fierce
And you cried with words asking, No,
Begging to be saved
Your cry was carved deep into my mind
It was revealed to me then what a fool I was
Leaving me with a pale soul overflowing
With love, sorrow and a broken heart
You lost your life, you gave it away
And too what? a fool like me?
A nameless stray that can do nothing but betray
Now I simply lay as a curse blossoms inside my heart
Falling from a height concealed in plain sight
Awaiting my end at the hands of maybe another
Young, pathetic, unworthy, meaningless fool…

My birds having a nightmare.
Oh what should I do?
Wake her up?
Pet her?
Or end her just like I did you?

A time long ago, in a room unknown
It was late, like the arrival of undying patience
Born under pale moonlight, in the midst of a dark winter night
With ears raised and eyes shut,
Yet in a way it sat settled as if listening and staring at us
As a night solemn in ecstasy went about
Giving rise soon to a glisten of morning light
That showed us what it was that came to be
A child. Puny, innocent, pure and helpless
Born to an oblivious set of fools
Whom of were bought to the light
To whom were taught humbleness, humility, love and respect
To them was given an eternity of hope as a child.

I've often evoked that darkness
Is both beautiful and harmful
For it can give to us somewhat of a miracle
Uncalled for and untold of
And that horrible coincidental feeling
Is my hearts most lacking confession.

A subtle roar
Breathing in
At the start of dawn
Phantoms and dreamers
Half asleep, dazed
Stretching with deceitful yawns.
The soul awakens
The heart in inclination
listening to the silence
Within an illusion
Of passion and storm.
I close my eyes
With the nerve to deny
As I stare into my soul
One of ruin and sleepy edges
Only to realize
That I am no longer asleep
And you were nowhere to be seen.

Its been a while since I last fell in love
And god what a ride i must say that it was
From a rain into a storm, my heart ran amuck
Howling at the moon completely lovestruck
At first it was just hearty and so I thought it would fade away
But soon after Icame to realize that this aint no other dame
She was tiny and adorable, simple and just
Quite different from the rest I should say as a must
She was simple and around almost everyday with me
So how much I ever tried I couldn’t just forget about thee
A love like any other? Foolish I say
This might just be the one who may forever stay

Her eyes endearing in every possible way
Her voice so chirpy I could listen to her speak all day
And although this may sound simple and plain cliché
Im going in for this with the will to make sure she stays

She’s never dated before apparently is what I’ve been told
But many have tried and fallen out without goal
And me? What of me? Im simple as a stick
My heart can’t bare the fact of her reject
Still though I go on and take a few steps up ahead
I talk and get closer to her as days went by
I act like a fool cracking jokes silly as hell
Yet she laughed out loud whole-heartedly so to tell

And oh her laugh was one of a kind
So amazing that I burnt its very image deep into my head
Time went by the same old way
And soon we became inseparable and pretty close in a way
I didn’t want to **** it by asking her out
Im anyways a fool whats that great in a guy like me anyhow?
God im such a fool I dont even know why i tried
Now I’m just gonna be left broken hearted
And maybe go home and cry
But, you see, I forgot I was a fool
One so simple minded too
I walked up to her like any other day
And we began our usual routine woohoo
We talked about kittens and other adorably foolish things
When all of a sudden…
I take a deep breath and slap my cheeks
Ugh what am I doing? I look confused at her
But she’s as normal as ever and just laughed it off without a clue

Then out of nowhere god forgive me it was simply out of the blue
It slipped out at the tip of my tongue
“Would you go out with me this friday for maybe a dinner for two?”
It took me a whole ten seconds to realize what I had gotten into
I was embarrassed and in shock
Completely undone

I broke it, I killed it, I ruined it all
I yell in my head as the picture kept playing in a record
Like god, I do have my weaknesses and I do have my strengths
But this is not something that was meant to go like this

I look up at her and was maybe about to cry
When I see the end of her lips raised up to the ends of her sides
She was smilling like a fool, with a heart so content
Her innocence showing through the blush all over her neck
And I swear to god i thought she was about to run away
When all of a sudden she let out a sweet, soft, screaching “yes”

I was so pleased I nearly lost both my legs
Infact I actually fell down out of the happiness and my foolish attempt
My hearts strings tightened and I think a few tore
Cuz well… I didnt expect it to work at all
But well it doesnt matter because she said YES
And now we’re going out and well.. yea? Thats it I guess

This life is an asylum where we are patients unwell, possessed by the need to move and escape. Some believe that they are heroes, some believe they are nothing but most of us here are fools who have maybe thrown this life away, we surround ourselves with material objects by which we feel will bring to us less grief and pain, and when asked what it is you love, you lie saying that there is no one nor anything to.
"What of your father, mother, brother, sister? What of them?"

This was the only truth where you would not reply for they truly do not exist.
Your father died the death of a drunk, a fool. Your mother a *****, a poor one a that. Your brother was weak and had no will so he chose to end whatever was left of his life. Your sister.. your sister was young, beautiful but she was thrown as a stray where she was left for dead with her last breathe.
You were however not left then, visited continuously by them “the doctors” they came asking you the same question day after day.

"who or what do you love?"

They followed on with money? Beauty? And words which all meant nothing to you and you replied with the same arrogance of the fool that you once were. Shouting, screaming and yelling at them.

"I despise everything, the same way you fools despise your god with every tiny, petty ounce of faithless worship."

Soon with time, so too did they leave you as you are… as you always were, alone. However they did not understand that it was time alone that you needed, time alone to collect your thoughts and calm yourself down, only they did not realize that, and so you were left aside…

Years passed and you were left with only the care for your daily needs. Food, washing's, sleep and medicine. Years passed when finally you were visited by an astonishingly young stranger, a girl, one who was around the age of your younger sister at the time.
She was filled with youth, beautiful, almost as if she were a goddess from heaven, one that you never thought you would meet in this life… she walked up to you in a slow pace with her feet hitting the marbled laced floor with a rhythm of *** and tat, and when she finally arrived before you she asked.

"Who or what is it that you love?"

And you replied, whole-heartedly with a never ending single or so tear running down the side of your cheek.

"I love the incomparable chaste blue of the sky, the mimicking and ever so toning white of the clouds, the marvelous clouds, in all its beauteous visage. I love everything in all its beauty."

And you said so with a smile that ran along the sides of your cheeks, with a tear that soon stopped, in a room resembling reverie, in which a stagnant and almost as if never ending atmosphere of negativity just vanished… leading your idol soul bathed in regret and anguish away to a better place under a new moon of voluptuous dreams.

1.
He sings
And burns in his old age
Raging against an ever so slowly
Dying light
Slowly laying to sleep
seemingly quiet, across a frozen horizon.

2.
She in an intermittent flow
Heals, and brings about a glow
With bonds of cold ice
Illuminating everything that is
until she too lies
In a deep sleep

3.
Now against
An eternally never ending frontier
Of circling dreams, collapsing
At the discovery of receding howls
And a charred sea of amber light

4.
These two inch towards each other
Ever so slightly, ever so slowly
Until they soon meet
And hold at each other
At what is a perfect
Complete, connecting
Eclipse.

A silhouette of some kind
That appeared and vanished
At the end of what seemed a horizon
A silhouette of a creature
That left behind the day
And just so simply vanished…
With a sigh I defy
The fact of what I saw
And had written it away as a memory
A memory that I had made to be as a figment of my imagination that I had formed in this gloomy day..
And with a chuckle I cleared my throat
And moved on…
But I couldn't sleep
For that night
The moon so lavishly
Without a care
As though without a thought
Stood
Shimmering in the sky beautifully
Instantly revealing that what I had seen this morn..
And with a feeling
That seemed as though this night would never end
I walk up and ask
That if not impossible
Can you tell me who you are?
I wonder A beast, a spirit, a demon, an angel, a monster….
You do not speak
And I start to dream
And for some reason… with every minute that I spend
Staring at you
I begin to fall in love..
Oh god.. help me..
For it seems that
I have once again begun to feel…
And as I try to avoid
And as I try to move
It seems that
I cannot get myself to keep away..
From connecting myself to you…
In a way that will never break away..
Oh how a bitter day has made its way
For a simple silhouette now soaked and stripped
Completely transparent with nothing in its way
A silhouette of black and white
Completely stripped down
As though wishing to die
And as the day goes by
You seem slightly in sight
I try to move on and walk away
But wherever I go
I seem to find you somewhere..
And unfavorably
I gaze at this
Lilac horizon
When all of a sudden
..What happened?
The clouds seem to have disappeared
And you are no nowhere in sight
Yet under a cloudless sky falls a downpour
Indefinitely in sight
Confirming I hadn't just gone blind..
It seems that I have just realized
That I had fallen in love with something otherworldly
I fell in love much more that I should have..
And now that you aren't in sight
I am lost Without a path to walk
I don’t know what to do
But why Even though we didn't speak
Even though we would just meet
Why does your absence
Create such a transparency within me…
And so I whisper good-bye, even if just for myself
Thinking that you were not but a figment of my imagination all this while
A tear drops As I take a step forward
A miserable and helpless man I was
What a miserable and helpless man I am…..
I fell in love with something unknown
I fell in love more gently that I thought
Such a tasteless romance..
To fall in love with something I do not know
To fall in love with something I do not understand
And as the hours go by
I begin to cry
I begin to cry
I request for a prayer
I request for a wish
"Give her a soul
Give her a body
Tell me she was real
TELL ME SHE WAS REAL ….please”
A silhouette so dark
A silhouette silent
Invisible and dark
As though never existent
Flying away
Flying away
And without knowing what you are
It seems I had completely fallen in love
A love so gentle…
A love so tasteless…
I fell in love with nothing but a presence
Of something I didn't know
Of something I didn't understand.

Your lull of silence and solace
Charming, fearful and young
Laying me.
Scared, still and tolerant
To sleep
I say fearful as it is due to your passion
I say charming as there is no better
And I say I am scared only out of my ignorance
For I had always doubted and feared your love
Until I was ambushed, in shelter
Under peerless stars as witness
You found me in hiding It was then that I broke
The madness turned me pale
Making me realize that you were the only one for me
And so I say with hope
That you will listen without doubt
“Je m’abandonne à toi, mon amant fou.
Alors aimons-nous maintenant comme jamais auparavant.”
And you with but a smile fall on to me
Burning me down with a love of your beauty
It was then I realized
I should have given in earlier
To this sublime horror that is you, my lover.

I would best describe women as flowers, for they are vibrant in colors just as in emotion and if I were a romantic I would say that she was the one flower I would not dare to pick up as I would only end up watching her wither away. In front of me.

That day
We were silent
We sat,
In an infinite space
You with your head
Lying on mine,
Heavy, with a shadow
Of nostalgia and beauty
We weren't asleep
We were simply together
And that's when I understood
I’d choose you.
No matter what the lifetime
No matter what the world
Nothing else, just you
For you, In your
Strange sense of beauty
Knew the words and ways of love.

If an overdose
On my medication
Can **** me…
Maybe, just maybe
Its nothing
But an assisted attempt
Of suicide from
My own doctor
For in the end
Death is nothing
But a side affect
Of these so called pills
That are slowly
And very eagerly trying
To **** me.

I am a cigarette on your lips
That you can’t stop pulling at
No matter how bad i may be for you
You do not care,
About the fact that I am slowly and very eagerly, killing you
You simply love the feeling
Of my lips burning so passionately against yours…