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1.3k · Dec 2018
8pm
Hello Daisies Dec 2018
8pm
Now 8pm feels like 4am
I'm running off of nothing
Dark blood bleeds from my face
twisted thing is I'm too far gone to care this is the way i am
Im so tired im working so hard trying ro get better and its getting worse the nose bleeds wont stop they go on for so long my body is weaker everyday and i just hope i die
Nothing is ok and never will be again
853 · Jan 15
Inside me
Hello Daisies Jan 15
I like it
The feeling
Of you inside
Me

I want it
The heart beat
Against
Me

I feel filthy
***** with you
On top
Me

I desire it
You moaning
Pleasures into
Me

I used to be inoccent
How boring
I hated
Me

I like being
Naughty
Why don't you spank
Me

I'll call you
Daddy
While everyone else hates
Me


God please
Just
****
Me
This is a little uh yeah but also yeah
551 · Nov 2018
Depression
Hello Daisies Nov 2018
Sleeping all day
Never washing my clothes
Skin and hair a mess

I'm fine
I'm fine
Can't whine

Forgetting to eat
Getting sick from all foods
Never changing my clothes

Nothings wrong
Nothings wrong
I must still belong

Staring at walls
Headache won't go away
Putting everything off

It's okay
It's okay
There's other days

Crying while watching tv
Repeating my mistakes in my head
Can't sleep at 4am

Just another day
Just another day
Im used to this anyway
Im been feeling down but nkt really ive mainly felt nothing. The kind if depression that i didnt even realize was hitting me. Until i realized i hadn't been eating or showering or doing anything for myself. But even upon realizing it i cant fix it. Now i try to eat and im nauseas. I try to shower and i feel dirtier. Idk. Guess im fine.
546 · Dec 2018
Ugly depression
Hello Daisies Dec 2018
Dress up your depression
Stockings and lipstick
Dancing and music

No it's all scattered
A mess everywhere
Just keep shedding tears

Mask your pain
With ***** and ***
Clubs and latex

No you're too sheltered
Poor and locked away
Openly showing **** shame

Take it as a specialty
Write pretty plays and poetry
Make meaning for your suffering

No you have no talent
Give up and sleep all day
end it all can't hide the pain
:/
517 · Dec 2018
First love
Hello Daisies Dec 2018
Late night talks
Of boys that Ive loved in the past
none have ever loved me
Except one boy i thought truly understood me

For once in my life my feelings felt reciprocated
Possibly fell harder then I for them
We spent nights together laughing until dawn
We stayed up smiling all night fighting the yawns

He told me sweet things so casually i always wanted to hear
It wasnt a pickup line he just said how he felt
I felt a touch of this could finally be something for the first time
He made my heart and mind all a mess i could not rhyme

I wasnt afraid to be myself
He enjoyed every aspect of me
each night spent closer then the last
I grew to fall deeper
he made me love myself with all my so called sins

Too afraid to truly let it be
I ran away and hid
Thinking i ruined it all
he seemed to understand and not blame my fall

It was all happening
A real date something only in fantasy
Twas to happen after I confessed myself to him
the nights went by and i felt a sharp pin

My heart filled with worry as the day grew close
He went silent as a complete ghost
I wrote him with a sliver of hope the night before
He casually said nah I'll go with this other *****
This happened a while ago and tongiht ny mind decided hey im not over it.
Been in kinda isolation lately and just
Thinking about how I'll always be alone and always have ans the one time i got close
And it hurts
It also hurts to see others just like me also crt about being alone
Life is just constantly sad
470 · Jan 26
Pound
Hello Daisies Jan 26
Pounding
  Pounding
           Pounding
                            POUNding
                                         POUNDING
                      poUNDING
               POUND
ING
       ING
POUND

Everyday
It pounds
Each side
I'm on the
     ground
Crying
Cry

   Ing
How many times
Can i wish
     For
        Eternal
Dark

            Ness
My head hasnt stopped throbbing in pain for over a month now
422 · Jan 6
Cage
Locked away
Threw away the key
Why isn't freedom easy

Ran away
So afraid but going
Falling  without knowing

Chased dreams
Too dark to see
Fell until empty

Damaged mind
Tried to be free
Bars building endlessly

Spirit gone
Brittle heart within
Let the devil in
:(
421 · Jan 28
Suicidal
Hello Daisies Jan 28
Depression
                           -----------
                          Lonliness
                 ­          -------------
                          Suffering
               ­              ---------
                       Pain.        Love
                Hurt.                    Scream­s
         Hated.                                  Needy
    Abused.                                             Sad
  Mocked.                                           ****
  Ashamed.                                   Religion
      Scared.                                     Scarred
         Poor.                                          Lost
           Weak.                                  Sick
               Fragile _    hurt _   broken
Hi
413 · Nov 2018
Selfish
Hello Daisies Nov 2018
The words are pouring out of me
The thoughts scramble in my head
As i lay in stress in this bed

I'm so deeply depressed
I write this out loud for all to see
And everyone says go seek therapy

It's like a shock when they hear
I am already seeking professional help and couseling
So they assume I'm fine and let the phone just ring

Everyone thinks the gesture of the hotline is good enough
Never stopping to realize i know the number
That's supposed to stop me from my eternal slumber

No one ever thinks
That a simple hug or being around
Could help someone keep their feet on the ground

If once someone could be there and listen while i cry
Just as simple as knowing someones there to comfort me in the dark
It would help me keep a little bit of spark

But I've learned all too well
People are inherently selfish as of late
They can't stop to help you with all that's on their own plate

Now i don't want to be the ***** who thinks she's better then all
Im just saying what i believe to be true
No one has ever stopped to help when I'm deep in blue

Unless i came crying and begging to them
Even then it takes them time before they'll stop to see if I'm okay
Becuase they have more important things then if I'll decide to live another day

I myself am selfish as can be
But i always tried to fight it and stop to help anyone in need
But to expect that from another is what's truly selfish of me
im just not ok and no matter of tberapy or meds seems to be helping. No one is ever around for me to even just be a normal friend amd thats really weighing. Guess life alone is fine too.
367 · Dec 2018
Dry
Hello Daisies Dec 2018
Dry
My lips are dry
With no lover
To fix the burn

I lay alone to yurn
Maybe alcohol
Will keep me warm
I should sleep
326 · Sep 2018
Because
Hello Daisies Sep 2018
I feel it boiling inside
I laugh it off and try to hide
It sturs within my body
The rage of being treated like a nobody

Because I cry
Because I can't lie
Because I love
Because I honor things up above

They think I'm not good enough
To handle things because they're too tough
For someone so fragile and small
Yet from my eyes my emotions help me stand tall

Everyone has these flaws
But they hide them they build walls
I don't hide them I show everyone my all
They look down on me making me feel small

Because I'm emotional
Because I'm scared
Because I'm fragile
Because I'm brave

I know there's nothing wrong with me
No matter who looks down I'll look up and smile widely
Because being this way is never wrong
No being this way is what has made me strong
This is not great but I'm feeling a mess of bad emotioms and mainly anger right now. People keep looking down on me and ignoring me. They have my entire life. Because im too emotional so i csnt handle things. No. I cant handle so many things you'll never understand. You have no idea. But if that's how you want to perceive me then thays how it is I'll move on to people who will appreciate me. Might be few and far between but I'm used to it.
302 · Feb 1
Scars
I look at my scars
Darkend on my skin
Like spilled ink on paper

They're barely noticeable
Similiar to myself
holding deeper wounds
Only seen as an ingnifiant mark

I hate myself
Too much to be sad
Over scars from past
Im still making new ones

My body wasn't made to last
My mind made sure
So deeply insecure
I promise no-one sees

Always forgotten
Until i open a new one
What have they become
But a reminder

Im a broken window
Everyone sees right through
Tape over the whole
And ignore the shattered parts

My scars arent enough
To signify my pain
They don't scare anyone
Theyre too plain

Endless void of choking
Choking on life
Since I swallow it
No-one cares what's left inside

You may stay scars
I won't hide you
I'll just ignore you
Like everyone does me
Ive been ingored my whole life so I'll ignore my own body as well
288 · Sep 2018
Love-less
Hello Daisies Sep 2018
Oh sweet child
What has the world done to you
You used to have so much love so wild
Until they stripped the rose glasses away from you

You fell in love with so many souls
Yet each one ripped you apart and laughed at the mess
You blackened out your heart yet no one seems to know
It's all you could do it just hurt much less

You're afraid to ever love
But also terrified you'll never find it deep down
But now you lie and say loves for fools with white doves
Because that makes you look wiser even with your constant frown
I feel very numb to feelings anymore becsuse i did it to myself on purpose. Ive sorta beem taught from life thats what i have to do. always feel like an idiot when i have feelings for people
258 · Dec 2018
Desire
Hello Daisies Dec 2018
Fairies are beautiful
Green and sparkling
Free and flying

Fires are dangerous
Burning and soaring
Disastrous and deadly

Fairies and fires dont mix
Both can't fit in one soul
Let me sparkle as i burn you whole

**** and sin
Beauty with a grin
Everything i am is the devil

Give me the torch
I'll set you to scorn
In a fire with your horns

Watch me drop the torch
I'll burn with you
I'm disgusting too

Anger thrashes heavily
Selfishness sins in secret
Darkness i must protect

Too afraid to let it out
Dark shadows within skin
Screaming to let swim

Different on the outside
Not fairie nor fire
Just evil with desire
Idk if this one makes sense veen having trouble exoressing my emotions as if late because im pretty deeply deoressed and numb
I don't do well with that but a song made me feel so i wrote
244 · Dec 2018
Good girl
Hello Daisies Dec 2018
I'm not your good girl
I'm not your angel
I'm not the innocent bliss you want

I'm the mess of the world
Im the party girl people judge
Im the **** you're ashamed of

I'm not who you think
I'm not what you wanna see
I'm not this prairie girl

I want to be me
I want to do bad things
I want to be a *****

Why won't you let me be
Me
I wrote this a while ago and forgot to post this is something i feel deeply still. Amd something i hate that people think of me ir how they judge me
Also wrote this when i was actually inspired
239 · Dec 2018
Married
Hello Daisies Dec 2018
I'll never get married
Love is a lie
Be single til i die

Cinderella was beautiful
Prince came to her
And sparkles were everywhere

They rode into
Happily ever after
With joyous laughter

Love like that exists
Until you open your eyes
And you start to cry

love left you traumatized
After so long they changed
Became so deranged

I'll never get married
Anyone i ever love
Turns into a black dove
238 · Dec 2018
Hurts
Hello Daisies Dec 2018
I woke up at 4am crying
I do not know why
I've been screaming all along
There is no meaning!!
It hurts
It hurts
Oh god it always hurts

Sing it with me boys and girls
Everyone sing
It hurts
It hurts
Oh god it hurts

that's all i can ever write
it never ends
Everyday i breathe
im so tired of not being me

I want to be deep
saying something that matters
all that rings in my head
Is the pain
Becuase it hurts
It hurts
Oh god it hurts

How pathetic
I claim to be a poet
Yet write the same ****
About my loneliness
And  misery
I want some chivarly
Stop crying now

Everyone knows it hurts
Write something useful
Soemthing with beauty
No one wants to hear of the cruelty
About how much it hurts
It hurts
Oh god it hurts

Im still crying
Im posting too much today but my mind will not calm down since i woke up
223 · Nov 2018
Peace and love
Hello Daisies Nov 2018
Free and flowing
Vivid dreaming
Never knowing
Where I'll be next

Pink and full of fluff
Dancing carelessly
Nothings too rough
With peace and love

Sunshine and smiles
Confidently living
Openly being wild
With my emotions

Beauty and stars
Flowing clothing
Driving fast in cars
With new faces along the way

What am i talking about, you ask?
A life full of peace
A life i feel within my hidden mask
that i want to let shine through brighter then the sun
Im always trying to find myself not knowing who i am but i always come back to these kinds of emotions, soft and at peace. I love colors and i love freedom. I only wish inwas confident in myself the way i imagine to be. Flowing in the wind.
221 · Sep 2018
No Use
Hello Daisies Sep 2018
Well maybe I'm starting to know
Deep down in my being
That to try in this world has no meaning

Maybe I've always knew
But it's overflowing
My entire life the strife has been growing

The harder you try
The harder you fall
But try they say or it'll mean nothing at all

I feel as a fool
Breaking my back
For a life that doesn't love me back

I blame myself
And i blame others
Really i just need to close the shudders

Why unravel thyself to the world
Trying, bending, and overflowing everyway
When we'll just end up closed off and buried six feet under anyway

Theres no point,  
no point at all
We'll all rise and eventually fall

So lets all take a deep breath
Breathe in the truth
That life, love, trying it's all useless there is  no use.
I wrote this a bit ago while going through a hard time and losing a lot in life
216 · Jan 4
Gardens of life
Some flowers grow
Yellow Some White
Every flower is different
But most all need the light

Weeds are picked
Said to be bad
They were just trying
With what they had

Some flowers grow
Tall
Taller then any others
They may be afraid to fall

Some plants produce
Fruit and vegetable
That being their purpose
Others may think that questionable

Many plants are damaged
Petals falling off and dying
These types dont sell often
But **** are they trying

Seeds may fly
Taking roots anywhere
Afraid of where they'll go
Others stay claiming its unfair

There are so many
Different plants and flowers
Trying to categorize them all
Is kind of a disaster
Hi been just seeing that everyone is damaged and everyone is so different they show theie damage in different ways. We are all human but all grow into ourselves differently.
215 · Jan 6
Hate
I hate you
And this heart
Beating within me

I hate this
The crippiling desire
To curse your soul

What's wrong with me
   what's wrong with me
      WHAT'S WRONG WITH ME

I hate the sky
It's beauty is a lie
the blue peace is a facade

I hate existence
The very feeling
Burning with blood

  Why am i like this
    Why am i like this
       WHY AM I LIKE T H I S

I ******* hate myself
**** me and everyone else
Take a sledgehammer to my brain

I loved everyone
I thought i did
Love was never known to me

I hate that I hate
It's filled with anger and hurt
But maybe i must hate

Before i can learn to love
Having existence issues :')
200 · Oct 2018
Isolation
Hello Daisies Oct 2018
Heart pounding
Through my ears
My eyes bleed
With my current fears

It's quiet here
There's no sound
My body falls
Into the ground

I've made a mess
It's flashing in my mind
Where did everyone go
I'm left behind

I'm in isolation
The walls are talking to me
I left this cell so long ago
But the shadows came back for me

My vision is fogged
My ears are pumping
With the sound of silence
My body won't stop jumping

Isolation is my fear
There are demons in my head
They are pounding through me
They want me dead
Currently been alone for a while with massive nightmares and panic attacks. Guess thats fine. have a lovely night everyone ❤
186 · Dec 2018
7Am rain
Hello Daisies Dec 2018
Early morning dew
Misty foggy air
Fills my lungs

Chilly unconvered hands
Dripping wet windows
Eases my clogged mind

Puddles in the road
Silent lights dimmed near by
Creates calm in my face

Nostalgia pierced through
Children playing at recess
Easing my eyes back to sleep
It rained and it was all misty at 7am and like it gave me nostalgia and the smell after it rained just i love it
184 · Nov 2018
Cold
Hello Daisies Nov 2018
Cold
Shivering
Sad

I don't know the words to say
But i can really feel the gloom from today
I like colder weather but today is a sad day and im freezing and I'm just pretty sad
183 · Sep 2018
Take me (thanks to you)
Hello Daisies Sep 2018
Take me up high but drag me

    Down
Low
My starry eyes look UPon you
But with no |glow|

I shrink and shiver with YOUR BREATHE upon me

I want to feel safe
Noone come near


Me

Take me away
Somewhere more         [safe]
I was a fool to ever have faith

My starry eyes shatter
Underneath my heart

it's a pit within my stomach
It makes me want to lie
underneath you and *****

For i was a f l o w e r
Blooming and ~colorful~

Now I'm a puppet

Dead and miserable
I wrote this to the man who used me for years manipulated me and eventually molested me, i hope you notice tbe strange and messy symbols, capitalization, and placement were done for a reason. To show the mess in my head to describe the meaning. I really like this one i wrote. I can feel it.
169 · Dec 2018
Shattered
Hello Daisies Dec 2018
Broken girl
Empty world
Repeating these words

My hearts been half alive
Except when we three collide
Sunshine and rain we thrived

The noise is drowning
The smiles are frowning
Loneliness is pounding

Breaking inside
You try to hide
My heart just can't deny

The bowl is empty now
Tipping without dripping somehow
Until the glass shattered down

You made smoke mirrors
my heart numb with errors
I did not want to feel the terror

The dark hit the sun
I knew i didn't belong
beautiful moments suddenly felt gone

Why must i cry at my joyous past
With you forever it would last
breaking down with pain so vast

I thought my heart to be broken
But a new feeling has awoken
Being fixed is stolen

I'm shattered
Why must i continue a life of onky hurt and pain
Awaking everyday to a new hurt
Everythingms getting darker
Just when i thought i found a light again it was a joke and i got hurt so much worse
I cant try any more
Realkt thought i might end it all but guess im here still
168 · Oct 2018
positivity
Hello Daisies Oct 2018
There once was a girl named Mary Louis
She was from another planet far away
She was so excited to learn all the things she just had to stay!
Everyone enjoyed her silly self, always chasing bees

They called the alien little miss positivity!
She was always happy and eager to learn
Until she tried to do things with no money and got burned
The humans looked at her and said what are you thinking get in  reality!

She took this as a stepping  stone still excited for life
She'd dance wherever shed go never staying still
Everyone got annoyed with her and told her to jump off a hill
They told her you're too old for fun come get with strife!


No matter what happens, she said she wouldn't lose her self
She'll see the good in everyone always there for those in need
They told her she was naive everyone will make you bleed
They didn't like who she was she was too different from everyone else on the shelf

Now surely she cries every night wishing for her death
She doesnt smile to humans anymore she lets them know of her sad soul
They look at her and say be positive,  you could be so phenomenal!
Mary cries into her hands, but this is what i was taught, to be sad until my last breath!
I dont think this is actually good but i had a story in my mind i wanted to write and thought maybe i would try it as a poem
160 · Dec 2018
Love
Hello Daisies Dec 2018
Isn't it amazing
How one can fall from Grace
For one person to keep safe

Or how one person
Can never lose faith
Even when it's screaming in his face

They can fight battles
And demons alike
And smile together at the end of the night

Give up every last power
Be weak or strong doesnt matter
And share every laughter

And yet still be unsure
Unsure if the other has affection
Unsure if the other wants their attention

It's right there
As plain as anyone can see
You love eachother so easily

So shout it out loud
Don't let fear take it away
Before you lose another day
This may have been inspired by supernatural but its true. Sometimes it's plain as anyone can see that two people like each other but doubt always takes over and stops yoy from saying how you really feel
156 · Feb 13
Her
Hello Daisies Feb 13
Her
How come every
     Sick
           Abusive
Dark

Love song i hear
Reminds me
Of you

The fear
The essence
You hold
      In
     Me

It's not beauty
It's disgusting
Im disgusting
     Stop

You say I'm not
*** you know
It's ******* disgraceful

It's not tasteful
You inside me
But i take it
    Burning

Whisper my name
Surround me
Scream in shame
      
Noones to blame
You're a demon
Crawling about
        My skin

Swim skin deep
Keep me warm
You hold me down

With a frown
I'll sing a song
To honor your name
           So lovely

Am i keeping you
Or do you keep me
I thought i was a fighter

In the mirror a cryer
To others a lighter
Within it's burning
         Empty

Oh but of course
I see it now
You arent me

You're just the terror
And screeching
That rests within
        M  e
I lost myself today
So entirely
I don't think i can regain who ever she used to be
153 · Jan 28
Alone
Hello Daisies Jan 28
I'm in denial
That anyone loves me
It's not paranoia

I know the truth
It echoes in my head
As tears fall onto my bed

Nobody cares
I'm just a tool to use
For them to get ahead

Noones ever loved me
Noones ever gone beyond for me
I can't fight my insecurites

Because they're right
I am unloved
A cursed child

a mistake at birth
A burden growing up
Last resort as an adult

I'm never a first choice
Barely Last choice
So I'll lower my voice

Let myself be used
It's what tools are for
Not like I'll ever be beautiful

Why did you like me
Why did you sleep with me
Just desperate for any company

Found someone new
No surprise
Already used to the lies

No boy will love me
Nor any friend
But they'll sure pretend

Can't blame them
I don't even love me
filled with self pity

Years on repeat
Everyone leaves me
Always shamelessly

Not one soul
Would walk one extra step
To help me as I wept

Nor does anyone
Find me worth
Anything but a empty purse

I am unloved
Yet i exist
Why did god make me

So ******* helpless
This is a ****** mess of words but yeah hey atleast i know why ive been crying all day. All my thoughts and everything thats been happening has been echoing in my head that im alone. Im never a first choice and I'm only around for people who are desperate. They all leave me for someone better. Always. I guess my mom loves me at least.
If she didn't id have killee myself already lol
148 · Dec 2018
Rapunzel
Hello Daisies Dec 2018
Castles and queens
Red carpet and round tables
Warm wind through a poofed dress

Oh what a mess
No matter how hard they stress
That olden times were not like the movies its meaningless

For the

Dances like Cinderella
Simpler times in a castle tower
Dragons and romance with a prince

You'll never be able to convince
that this isnt what i want ever since
I was but a young sad girl ive dreamt of my Prince

King arthur and merlin
Excalibur and the lady of the lake
Green beauty and small hobbit holes

Oh sad girl you are in woe
For happiness you'll never know
You'll always be a locked away rapunzel
Something about that dark bittersweet beauty that i love. The stories of Merlin or if castles and queens with a sad twist but with joy and deep beauty and dancing
It makes my heart feel an emotion i csnt describe an emotion I'll never truly have in my life.
136 · Nov 2018
Colors
Hello Daisies Nov 2018
Pink is fun
Pink is bright
Pink is light

I desire to be free
I desire to be soft
I desire to be love
I desire to be pink

Blue is sad
Blue is chilly
Blue is not silly
Blue is melancholy

Sometimes I'm down
Sometimes I'm raining
Sometimes I'm drained
Sometimes I'm blue

Black is dark
Black is depressed
Black is colorless

I don't want to be soulless
I don't want to hate
I don't want to dissociate
I don't want black
Ive been feeling emotions in colors lately and pink is what i want but black and blue is how i feel
134 · Jan 15
Me
Hello Daisies Jan 15
Me
the more i grow
The more i see
Myself i know

Is disgusting

Never did i realize
Just how dark
The pain is in these eyes

It's disturbing

Finding myself
I want to stop
Can i be someone else

I'm a freak

Everything i hated
Never would i dare
Now it makes me elated

Soon I'll burn

I never was pure
Everyone insisted
I wanted to be sincere

Maybe i don't care

I'm selfish
I want to do this
It gives me small bliss

How sick

It's wrong
Others are hurt
Make the voices be gone

The sun never shines for me
:/ even when im happy its wrong
133 · Jan 25
Beg
Hello Daisies Jan 25
Beg
Bouncing
   Bouncing
          Bounce
On top

Thrusting
      Thrusting
            ******
Inside

  Pouring
      Pouring
            Pour
All over

Locking
     Locking
           Lock
Me up

Gagging
     Gagging
             Gag
Me down

Zoning
     Zoning
            Zone
Out

Dreaming
       Dreaming
              Dream
All about it

Giving
   Giving
        Give
Me it

Pleasures
  What i seek

Im on my knees
           Not weak
              But begging

  For it
Hi
Take from this what you may
131 · Dec 2018
Bleeding
Hello Daisies Dec 2018
Bleeding:


Thickens
Boils
Spills
*****
Messy

The bleeding will not cease
The green in my eyes are not peace
The adventure is a lie
I take the noose and tie

Bleeding:

Emotional
Pours
Loves
Hates
Desperate

The heart cries out for affection
My mind ceases into detention
I want him to love me
I'll take the price and pay the fee

Bleeding:

Living
Broke
Open
Afraid
Bleeding


I
Am
Bleeding
I wrote this a long time ago too and Hoenstly i realize the stuff ive been writong as of late isnt great like i lost my edge almsot like i forgot how to write? I think it's becauae im forcing myself to write because i don't wamt to not do it but im uninspired so it turns out so bad
131 · Nov 2018
Chess
Hello Daisies Nov 2018
Life is like a game of chess
I've been thinking about this a lot as i try to rest
Intially it's a game you strive to play with another
Playing chess alone wouldn't be worth the bother

Now i know probably not original to compare life to chess
But i cant help see the resemblance, if i may stress
Chess gives you many players to help you along
With those players comes choice right or wrong

Every move you make causes another to act one way
Later you might regret not letting that piece stay
You have a goal to make it out safe and win
And of course you try to succeed even with a little sin

A many time you may be trapped by another
Maybe a piece you counted on turned into a bother
You stragetize every move in order to survive
But at the same time won't win unless luck is on your side

Sometimes it's hard to see through the chaos which move to pick
One day you'll be a queen feeling mighty and slick
But one wrong move and you'll feel useless as a trapped ****
But the game doesn't end until your last breath is drawn

No matter how hard you fight you may find yourself in ultimate checkmate
causing a panic and crying you lost your fate
Or you may find you succeeded your goal and came out safe and sound
Though either way you are still not bound

With whichever result you find yourself in
You can always  start over with a new beginning
Although im sure most can relate
That mostly every game of chess you'll play ends in a stale mate
Idk just thinking a lot and super anxious and exhausted
129 · Dec 2018
Music
Hello Daisies Dec 2018
Close my eyes
See my dreams
Made of my bliss

Nothing is my happiness
From striving
To a n g e r

Sadness was my major
Always so                    Lonely
My eyes don't want to open

Sleep my only token
Pretending I'm as before
But laying here i know

Being alive is a show
I died inside
Yet they want me to believe

I keep going with no relief
I've given up on me long ago
Yet when music plays

Tears d
             rop where i lay
Small glimmer of emotion
Just may still remain after all
126 · Dec 2018
Somebody
Hello Daisies Dec 2018
I long to write
Beautiful things
Like Shakespeare
And elegant ballgowns
Something with more meaning
Then simply feeling down

I long to write
Of romeo and Juliet
Symbolic and deeper then most see
Oh thou arent very good with writing

I long to write
Like egar allen poe
Or any inspiration i claim to love
But instead i write of the dead things
That roam through my mind stirring

Pound pound pounding
My mind is  constantly aching
She's but a young child
Cry cry crying
For attention she seeks but it keeps dying

Plays and music will not be wrote
Of the things i write
For they are not artistic
They are but a jumbled mess
Never knowing where to place
Each
Line or
Stanza

Now I'm rambling
On and on and on
She goes sad and chaotic
Whispering obscenities
And screaming repetitive words and pleas

I adore the poems and songs
That at face value seem
Like they are about love for another
When truly they ring about darkness

Oh sweet child
Your love keeps thy so warm
But it's breaking into a storm
I watch you try to sleep
Why do you weep?
Dost thou not realize thy beauty?
Stab thy heart into shreds
For i cannot breath without the
But i cannot smile when thy fills my blood with led

Sweet little girl
You have made no sense
Get on your knees and repent
For you will never be

Somebody
My head was filled with so very mamy words this morning i had to get them all out
125 · Oct 2018
Go Away
Hello Daisies Oct 2018
where do i start
There are so many thoughts racing
Trying to find a finish line
But before they ever can a new one begins

And somehow they keep leading
To thoughts about you
The things you did to me
How sick you made me feel

I was so obsessed with you for so long
You ****** me over more then i can even understand
I thought once i said no more
That meant i would never have to think of you again

Yet your disgrace lingers
The pain you caused
Is still on my face
You're shaking my life
Please go the **** away

You make my skin crawl
Until i cant even sleep at all
I want you to go away
Why wont you go away

I wanted you to mature
To be someone better
I saw the **** within you
But i hate to hate

Now i see
You still wont let me be
I want to make you go away
Please just go away

Go away
Far away
Never stay
Just go away

I told you
I told everyone
Yet your disgrace
Only seems to hit me
in the face

I hear your name spread through the wind
By people who adore you
Why do people hold onto evil
And close their eyes to the good

Go away
Far away
Never stay
Just go away

One day when i write
It won't be about you or the distaste of your soul
One day I'll write a beautiful song
Of the women i let myself become

I want to write such beautiful poems
But inside i feel such a disgust
Everyrhing i write is absolute trash
Simply because i know not how to write of such vile natures

Go away
Far away
Never stay
Just go away

I said goodbye to you and meant it
Noone believed me they called me a liar
I'll do whatveer it takes
To never hear the curse of your name

When I'm free i can finally
Pray for your sorry soul
But while you stay and torment me
I only wish for your absolute ****

So please
Go away
Far away
Never stay
Just go away
I didnt put much thought into this just pure feelings, been gping through a hard time and it isnt getting better and it's like the person who hurt me gets away with it all. Shame.
Anyway i never said hi everyone! Im new to this website! Love everyones poems! You guys inspire me.
124 · Mar 11
Crush
Hello Daisies Mar 11
Pound
Pound
My heart beats
But it's not bad

Churn churn
My stomach twirls
But it's kinda nice

Dizzy dizzy
My head feels
But it's kinda fun

i feel nervous
Forget how to function
It's been forever since
I wrote a verse

A verse of twinkling
A song of curiosity
A fluff of fuzzy feelings
Ive got this funny feeling

You see
You're adorable
But i don't even know you
I want to try
But I'm so shy

I don't flirt
I run and hide
I think you're cute
How do i make this work

I gotta crush
It's almost nauseating
You got me flustered
But I enjoy this rush

So tell me, ***
How do I
Get more out of you
Then a look and
Run
Its been forver since i got all flustered over a boy
And as my past goes i always mess it up *** i got ****** anxiety and I'm weird and run away
119 · Feb 25
Torn dress
Hello Daisies Feb 25
It's dark
Dark as coal
Im sitting here
Screaming

Head buried in knees
White dress torn
Crying trapped in here

I see you appear
In my dreams
Of ****

You i can tell
Have also fell
Into the dark

I lie here torn apart
This torment only i own
Only selfishly

Open my eyes
I see you in the sky
Dark and crumbling

My lips fumbling
You are trapped
In the same torn dress

We suffer the same stress
My mind closes in
I see your tears

It grows my fears
For a second
I give up all hope

Why bother trying
When you're in the same *****
Shimmer of light peaks inside

For if i can take this life
And not back down
You are with me in this

We will share the crown
118 · Oct 2018
Unsual
Hello Daisies Oct 2018
Isn't it unusual
To read of love and joy
And cry tears of hurt and sorrow?

Isnt it unsual
For a happy feeling
To truly hurt and feel like it's borrowed?

Oh isn't it just a tad unsual
No matter how hard you try
To never fall in love with another?

I find it too normal
Until i see others
So close together when I'm never with a lover
Hi i start a new job tomorrow but i have so much anxiety over it so my thoughts are else where. I sometimes forget that falling in love or having crushes is normal to most. For me it isn't. Whenever i feel for someone else i am rejected and/or mocked as though i did something wrong. I never really feel like i fit in. I find it hard to watch happy romance movies they just make me feel sad. That's probably fine
117 · Feb 3
First time
I still remember
How you held
my hand
On your chest

I remember how you
Made me feel comfort
For my first time
With another

I asked you to take me
You asked if i was sure
I said yes
You obliged

Afterwards i didnt know
How to be
So i layed alone
Until you held me

Thank you
For making sure
I didn't feel
Used

I'm not mad at you
Becuase i knew
I'm simply
Afraid

To lose what i had
With you
I'm so insecure
But i can't be sincere

It was only
A hookup
I was warned
Many a time

Yet it happened again
So it left my mind
I want to keep you
Over the weekends

When they are over
You can go about
But you're being taken
From me

Like everyrhing else is
Why must she be here
She's ruining my get away
I don't like her

I'm sure that's wrong
It's becoming a blur
My mind hurts so much
I just want some companionship


  Please
Don't take it away from

Me
This isnt very good but i wanted to let out some overwhelming thoughts ive been having for months that are getting so much worse
117 · Dec 2018
Fuck you
Hello Daisies Dec 2018
Here's another poem
About another ****
It took me way to long

After poems of love
And heart felt words written
Why the **** was i so smitten

Crush
      Love
  
                    Disgust
  
 

Let another one use my heart
Let another one take me apart
Played nice and apologized

  ******
      Pig
           
                  ****

Way to flirt
With anything in a small skirt
But whine that youre alone

Way to make me feel
Yet act like there's no deal
Now you want my friend

**** it
      *******

                     ******* all

Im done with this
I'm not second best
Take my anger

And shove it up your ***
>:( dont really think this is good but Idk been feeling angry lately. People keep treating me like trash and playing with my emotions. So for now on If they're a **** to me then byeeee
115 · Jan 23
Broken
Hello Daisies Jan 23
I try to be positive
Think of the good
Say no to the dark

Yet the spark
That i try to relive
turns to dust

Sadness without trust
Stressed thoughts overwhelm
All i see is bad things to come

I can't stop taking lithium
I don't want to be alone
But this partner is too toxic

Happy thoughts inside a dark pit
The shadows won't go away
I am tortured in my dreams

Light died within the seams
It all fell out
I wish i was empty

All that's left of me
Is a shattered soul
Waiting to go home
I cant seem to make my bad thoughts go away. Even when i think kf something good that happneed ot somehow turns bad in my mind. I give up
112 · Nov 2018
21 and Reckless
Hello Daisies Nov 2018
today i am love sick
Yesterday i was reckless
This year i am entirely lost

I let my heart break so quick
I have been crying like a complete mess
My heart was frozen into a frost

I laughed when told to enjoy these moments
I cried when told these would be my best years
I broke because this has been the worst year of all

But now in this car the night soothes the torment
Because i realize from this **** trip that  I lived through so many fears
I braved through it and got up after every fall

No one would understand the terror in my mind
The sadness in my soul
The feeling of having your gut constantly churn

Sometimes i stop and feel  growth changing within my mind
I'm learning to let awful things go
Alanis morrisette really was right when she said you live and you learn

I am so reckless
I'm currently deeply heartbroken
A rising alcholic with noone to call my own
Crying at every failure


But I'll look back at this and learn it's ok to be a mess
Having my heart broke made my eyes open
I wanted to live life and I'm being shown
That to have fun and love I'll have to often be a total failure
Ive been going through so very much. Very deoressed and stressed. Possibly worst year if my life. But i keep going and i dont know how. Im terrified it'll get worse but after this trip i had i realized some things. The trip was my last hope for something good to happen. While it didnt work out that way it taught me to let things go and to be ok with being reckless right now. Just don't go too far. And that no matter what i can be strong. Im still finding myself
111 · Oct 2018
Together now
Hello Daisies Oct 2018
We are but flowers in the wind
We grew together
Different but with shared roots

Someone picked us
They tore us away
Now we each fly

With pedals swaying ever softly
We search for one another
But stumble upon brick walls

We hit the ground
But tis not soil we can grow on
We start to wither

The sun mocks us every day
The color we shared together fades
When will we ever blossom again

Someone picks one of us up
With a smile so bright
They put us back together in a jar of life

This jar may not let us live long
But we are together now
We are where we belong
I wrote this for my two best friends
100 · Jan 23
Breaking out
Hello Daisies Jan 23
Twisting
Turning
Banging
Where's the key

It's no mystery
The mess inside
It's pouring out
I want to hide

Breaking
Pushing
Screaming
Lock it up

Make it shut up
Keep the door closed
clawing it's way through
In fear my mind froze

Piercing
Throbbing
Screeching
Bolt it down

It's breaking my crown
Should i end it's life?
I can't find the key
Maybe death will stop this strife
My own thoughts will be the death of me
100 · Oct 2018
Darkest hour
Hello Daisies Oct 2018
My darkest hour
Is not when i hurt myself
Is not when i cry all night

My darkest hour
Is not when i have no wealth
Is not when I lose my might

My darkest hour
Is when my friend is in bad health
Is when my neighbor is lost in sight

My absolute darkest horror
Is when she's crying to herself
Is when she tries not to live another night

Is when i can't do a thing to help
My friends are going through awful tbingd right now and thegre far away and im hurt for them and i feel sick *** i can't help
100 · Oct 2018
Freedom
Hello Daisies Oct 2018
Everything i write
is about flowers and death
I think this is a sign
I want to be free

I can't take this boxed  in life
I want to run
Any chance i get

Fourty hours work in a hole
Is not who i am
I want to be in the wind

Flowers bloom with color
Their pedals flow through the breeze
Moving through and growing more life

I cannot have such a life
Therefore i want to run
But run to where?
The only solution i ever find

Is death
Death is the only freedom i know
But maybe I'll live
For the promise
That after this ****
We'll all be free
More then we can ever know
I want to be a hippie peace loving rv driving wonderer. But it's harder then it seems in life. Life just brings me down all too often.
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