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Absent Minded Jan 28
This weather usually bothers me.
I don't know if it's the time of year,
The season itself,
Lack of sunlight,
Or a concoction of the three,
But something always changes.
Maybe the breeze touches my bones, Freezing my brains,
Slowing me down,
And making me sad.
Maybe the chilled breath
Of death himself
Against my veins
Makes my instincts
Scream to bury myself alive
On a field of landmines.
fingers curl into loose fists,
grasping softly at the frigid air in hopes of
feeling the temperature change.

january, i adore you.

a fresh start, a blank slate: one entire year
of endless possibility.
january, you are freezing;
but with you comes change.

i love you, i do. but please excuse
the way my hands hold out
to grasp at March’s warmer breaths

i, too, wish to breathe a new life
warm and
full of sunshine
Aleah Dec 2018
I feel my body jolting,
I can't get away,
I'm locked in my bed,
Depression,
Eating me away,
Part of me feels everything,
and the other part,
Stops me,
Frozen in place,
What do I do,
I need to go,
But I can't,
*******,
Move.
james m nordlund Nov 2018
Earthen formed, as clay, my bodhi,

Deeba, with inner wick always lite,

Oli, light of thee light, sits.
Belated Good Diwali, Deepavalli, Deeba Oli to All   :)   reality
Nylee Nov 2018
It is seasonal
limited time period
Your smile, his frown
My car, her scar
A small episode by far.


Tiny twinkles
Cloudy atmosphere
Pull push
Open and close the door
Then sit on the floor.


Tired
And rest
Blooming rose
And the bleeding thorns
Leaving the pieces torn.


All it begins
And ends
We live and die
Nothing remains
No entertainment.


Replaced fractions
Divided notions
Agreed and discarded
Lies filled in truth
Because life gives no proof.


Ten steps, eleven jumps
Crawling there
After a huge fall
In between few moments
A sad sentiment.


A vacant headspace
It came and went away
Nothing stays
Good bad ****
All too early
A thought left
Distant.


Rough days
Cold nights
replaces warmth
tight shoulders
Stiff movements
Aching muscles.


The bitter taste
Sweetened in spring
And autumn leaves
Winter is coming
The ages pass
Just like that
.
lucav Sep 2018
Dear diary,
god do you have any pity for that of the sinner?
For I know how small my existence is and it hurts me lord.
All I wish is to be free from the isolation of my mind.
Diary,is it wrong to wish that those who hate me to have enough power to destroy me?
Truly I do wish for my demons inside to be defeated but unfortunately god I seem to have become them.
Diary,can I truthfully be stopped from throwing my life away?

The physical and mental burdens I carry,will they finally **** me?
Surely im not overthinking my pain,rather underselling it?
I crave for my body to be torn to shreds,made into a completely new being,one worth no mans lips uttering the name of.
Am I worth such desolate power?
Is it evil to wish to be alone,is it evil to wish for others to feel the same as me?
Is it wrong to hate this flesh I live in?
My greatest fantasy is to be in the comradery of death.
Diary,am I becoming the devil?
Or do I rather shadow the agony of **** I seek to bring.
this was a bizarre speech i wrote a long time ago that i turned into a poem
lucav Nov 2018
they ask me
do you want to get better?
do you intend on bettering yourself?
will you get better?
truth be told
i dont know
i've bit at my nails till the blood runs down my wrist
i've cracked all my bones till my knuckles were red
i've dug at my skin till i bruise
and no answer draws from the marks i leave
so maybe they should leave me alone
because i cant write the answer in skin and bone
rough times lately
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