I'm an observer,
I'm both within and without.
I see all your masks.

Glass dome full Of sticks,
stones grown in a broken home.
Windows; mirrors cracked

I love how: she looks, she smells, she tastes, she makes me feel, she makes me act, she just makes good vibes. I love you Mary Jane

I have a question. What is real? Should it be based on what you can feel because now feel can be touch or emotion, I feel the suns warm rays the same as I feel my heart break and no one can tell me or you that either is not real because we can feel so I ask what it is you feel? I for one feel imprisoned by the Mold society has put me in as a man I have to be handsome,brave,loving, trusting and understanding but at the same time because I am a man I am by default a conniving, cheating, abusive, alcoholic, womanizing pig, why? Because " we are all the same" such caprice why? Why is it I must feel ashamed to be a man why is it I must be everything you want and don't want, the light of your day and the darkness of the night the Prince Charming in your life fairytale as well as the villain with the apple in my hand ,the apple of my eye is that what you want? I feel as if I'm just the means to an end the end being the moment I yield to this mold these confines in my mind why do I have to feel like I'm the enemy? how is it my fault? you're the one who laid in the sands of his beaches indulging in that forbidden fruit from the garden of eden, your tears now fueling its sea,  but all i hear are your cries of betrale his name the lyric of choice but I see, I should take the blame its what is wanted of me the good guy but the moment I deviate from your plans I am the evil one I'm the reason for these broken hearts mine and yours I'm the devil can't you see the flames you set In my personal hell in my mind in my soul
why is it I'm a mockery?

Are you the end, severing my potential?
Are you a end, or are you a beginning a apathetic agent who clears the way for the new?
Am I old, or have I done what destiny prescribed and you are giving me a pen for a blank canvas for my own tales?
Aren’t you the gate keeper, the one who welcomes those to the starless lands?
How can I write anew tale at the end of all tales, do I need to? there is no light to show my glory no light to revel my despair
Ah, you are death.
A poem; a bout, the acceptance of death
We fear you because of your necessity but heed not the toll of neccesity on you.
You are the owls ***** in the night.
The solace at the end of the longest and most periless of trials.
To know about you is to fear you but to know you is to love.
you are my friend and the last I will ever see.
I know you?

I once heard that art is most beautiful when imitateing life . I never understood this; imitation infers a falsehood, a lack of authenticity. Art can only be what it is, unapologetically,It can’t build a facade.
I ,the one who is deemed alive, lie habitually to those around me and worse my self.
I am a performer playing the part of least resistance and greatness propitiation. Solitarily contemplating a collective I want to both develop beyond the horizon or envelop in the flames of a star.
conundrums are the base of these self destructive edifice. Best escape is outside of self, either on the wall in the air or on a shelf.  

Now who imitates who,
When One feels most real imitating art?

Slick, Drip, damp,drop, moist.
Thunder jealous of your groans
Lightning, of my strikes.

This is a new page.
Empty;Deep Love and woes fill;
The former is me?

I am a boy who doesn't know the worth of a dollar

I play my part.

I am a friend who is there for his even if they don't know

I play my part.

I am a lover who knows how to lift your spirt even when the love is only shared by me

I play my part.

I am a console to those who think they are alone

I play my part.

I am an ingrate who doesn't appreciate the sacrifices you have made

I play my part.

I am a smile that hides the sadness on the other side

I play my part.

I am the one who listens even when no words are spoken

I play my part.

I am a hypocrite who preaches but rarely practices

I play my part.

I know what I want and never what I need

I play my part.

I am who I am so no one can say I am worthless because,
I play my part.

We want what we can't  have.
I want to be more then what i am.
I want to be more like what you want.
You want what seems like perfection.
You want me when I'm not around
But when I'm home I'm not good enough?
I want to give you what you want and need,I can't, I try my best.

We want something that's as epic as Romeo and Juliet but we end up like Adam and Eve.
Bringing nothing but turmoil to our world , or is it just on my end am I weak ,is that my flaw?,

I feel to much even when there is nothing there?
I want to know your secret.
How are you so Unphased by what's happening?
You want to know why I try so hard
I'll give you the answer...
I want to be happy.
I want to live in bliss.
I want you.
You want the same but it seems not with me,
the irony.

A map is used to find direction and your current position. I find you can get all this from listening to RAP,
Now RAP is to me rhythm and poetry which can be changed to music and poetry(MAP) but we are taught that rap has no meaning in the bigger picture when in fact it paints the current picture

Now we only have our position how can this be a map? In life you find direction for oneself so how could this differ? Rap lets you know where you are so you can know where to go because life is change,
Not only to acquire fame but those who make the biggest change are the ones who are most famous, that's your direction not fame but to make change.

So we have direction and position proving RAP can be thought as a lyrical MAP

You speak to me and say "you just waste the day away"
I respond "you could've just said hey" but that's ok.
I light a smoke too your dismay
"Every smoke you have cancer will repay"
I pay you little mind as I ash on the tray
"I smoke my all days because it takes the pain away"
My train of thought you dismissed
I was too far gone in euphoria ,this bliss.
This is a lift i could've never missed.

Can you prove it,
Reality.
Even though me and you can persive the same thing,
That just validates what we are seeing in our
Reality.
could it be that reality is just a concept?
If so does the mean we can contest it?
Better yet best it ?
If you think you can you will.

This is my haiku
Listening to mamas gun
Erykah badu

There once was a man from Calcutta
he spat game like no other,
women would sleek and swoon
take him to their room
this list includes your mother.

I know the way to her heart,
And no, it's not through laughs
I'll climb her like a ladder,
**** like a jack hammer
But eat her out for starts.

Why do I feel so empty
I have what most dream of but I feel hollow
I'm trying to see in to myself it's like looking through a hole for a key
I think it's locked me out sorrow
Because if I don't know what's making me sad
It will only bring more sorrow
It's self presavation and I can't get mad
It's my self that put me in this position
I get so angery to know I hold the key
Me and my inner me are in a Juxtaposition
But the bottom line is its all on me
Cause I'm a result of every thing I've thought
And all I'm thinking is I'm alone
But its something that life had taught ,me
That I am alone
I have been forced to distrust on sight
I must see your true colors in that light
I would like to know  that it's alright
I think "can I trust ?""you just might"
To put what little faith I have in to someone
And that faith is abuse from day one
Or two Or three
I think "there playing you can't you see "
"shut up you always do this,
no matter who I'm with "
"I do it for your welfare,
I must make you know no one cares"
"But this one might let's give them a chance"
"***** what you saying" I didn't even take a stand it fueled my like a lance
I thought he was right no one pays thought to my story
And the ones who do leave in a hurry
I'm so lonely

Tired of being Awake and Sad, least let me sleep.

A weeds confidence.
A heart; strong as a boulder
mind clear like a stream

What are we truly,
Specs of celestial dust.
Kin to sun and stone.

Lust, pain, depression, lose and love are my muse.
lust's passion which knows no bounds frees me.
pain's intensity and relentlessness push me.
Depression's depth, which out class even the sea, teaches me.
Lose like a loaded gun keeps focus and flashes what is important to me.
love with its fickle sway like a new flame ignites my page for all the world to see.
My muse are not new they are not uncommon they are rusted and jagged but they are the pillars on which all life and poetry now rests they guide us-
No they control us.

What I can't regain
I will create a new, just,
Need to see it through

I love your voice, I love your eyes.
I love your style and what it hids.
I love your hair so dark,so strong. relaxed, natural what matters most is who's it on.
I love your skin so soft and smooth. I know those scars are because of what you've put yourself through.
I love your smile, teeth as white as the moon. I'd love to see your true smile so rarely shown.
I love your spirit so free so strong.
I know in time you'll see here's where it belongs.

A
        ghost, ghoul and demon
live where my
        trust,love and happiness
used to be, their names are
        past,present and future.

You've been with me from the start,  
Our distance couldn't be shorter but we are so far apart .
I miss the times we would sing for no reason.
I miss our poems written almost by our feelings.
We found happiness in the compositions of our plain
but looking back I'm clearly not the same.

The world is hardening me,
It broke my dome protecting my reality.
I lost the trust, the bank is closed,
Even in lust the lack of love shows
Because for one you need the other.
Injaka turned  into strays
my brothers, I now call them cain
But how was I able?
I was their dawg...see now I had no seat at the table.

I'm  confused I don't know what to do,
I know it is because I'm losing you.
Want to go back to the old days so we can do it the old ways.
how are we in the same place but I can barely rocognize your face?
The cities lights dazzal my sight
The cold numbs me on these city nights
The monotony is draining my will to fight i see this when i think "What would i even write?".

I wonder how you'd feel if you could see the new me.
I do know one thing I  miss you,
the old Manezi.

I want to be free
The strings spun a hard to see
But cut they shall be

Phoenixes tears fall
Burn, Like fire from the rain
Power in weakness

Behold my face, so serene, I'm every part of the scene;
the crucified, the prosecutor as well the chorus.
When I breath my chests cage shows gaps ,the focus.
Here you are again my parade of pestilence my imbalanced state showing as ailments.
My sides tearing, stress penetrating my skin. Tragic,
Oh how the spear of reproach entangles and dives deep,
Piercing my belly and lets it noxious poison seep.

I beg 'No please do not twist', he then spoke of my dying dreams and loses to the soul.
The knots bind my thought and any move in conciseness has it toll.
The darkness strives for my sight but he knows how to not give it room.
The poisoned tip barley nearly missed my heart , I thought it the end, I relaxed too soon.
The tincture of doubt burns my open sensitive soft non-flesh.
Am I not one of the blessed, where is my place of rest?

The jury spectate from its pedestal, good for nothin but blaming.
His aim was never my life only that which makes it worth living.
His aim was the spark, my soul, the light at the end of the tunnel showing it all, so you don't stay down when you fall.

The earth knows me from My hands, feet and knees.
I rarely pray only spoke if it preceded an action, I fell a lot you see.
Now I walk with caution but my legs can barely take the weight.
My breathing and steps were heavy. you wouldn't have know my pain by my face
This has been my truth I believed it fate.
Early I realized wherever I sat was a throne.
Hubris led me to take on the woes and faults of the world as if they were my own.

The jury clamor great hollow truths, to lessen the sentences existence.
As much as they are valid and grand I see them only as excuses
"You will pain those who you love and love you"
"You will forsake the hopes and dreams in your view"
"You are good, only want the best for everyone "
Was it that ambiguity that lead to my current "wrong"
Seems if you aim to give others happiness you will never win
I know this but I still hurt: it's all starts and ends within.

Woe is me

I fall in love quickly, I fall out even quicker

Time flies, you are lost.‬
Time flies when you are driven.‬
Time flies, regardless‬.

A bow too tightly strung, now shaking, because of a notch and arrow moans like the creeks of wood; quiver as I use your quiver. now release

‪petty and selfish,‬
‪The path to peace, no recourse.‬
‪I have no remorse.‬

You guided me, you showed me a world different from the plain I had existed in,
You showed me my own twisted and tormented visage.
 
Sensei you were my light, your radiance was blinding,

But I saw it,

The abyss you left in your wake the ones left with no way to see,
Their eyes left useless,
their steps chaotic,
their hearts empty,
their minds in ruin.

Sensei this was your art.

Thisis is my name and now this is my domain

This is where I am king.

Sensei why do you look so pained?