What's ya name?
What's ya sign?
Where you from?
What's ya zodiac sign?
What turns you on?
I'm just tryna learn a few things about,
Is that okay?

I use to hurt people,
Now I help people,
The pain brought me some peace,
It had me thinking about my life,
Thinking about my choices,
Looking at myself,
Questioning my motives.

Life ain't the same for me,
Don't think the same,
Don't live the same,
Don't feel the same,
God replaced my heart with a new heart,
Was once cold-hearted,
Now I have a big heart.

Facing pain in the eyes changed my vision,
Crying my eyes out left me numb,
What I felt I can't feel no more,
What I was doing I ain't doing no more,
The way I was living i ain't living no more,
Confessed my sins and repented,
God forgave me,
Right my wrongs,
I'm now singing a new song.

I'm from a broken family,
Mama was always there,
Daddy went missing since beginning,
It broke something inside me,
Ain't been the same since,
As I grew up it made me stronger,
For the longest I was cold,
When I let it go I seen something different in me,
Life hasn't been easy,
Being where I'm from made me hungry,
I ain't ever been greedy,
Didn't have to beg mama to fed me,
Mama fed us with all she had,
Didn't ever want for nothing,
Didn't ever have to question my mama's love,
We all knew she loves us,
Her love surrounded us always,
What's real doesn't have to be said.

All that pettiness doesn't upset me,
Honestly it amuses me more than anything,
Words don't do nothing but give me humor,
People always talk **** about you,
It don't matter what you think of me,
The only thing that matters is what I think of me.

You're only talking **** about me,
Because you're not happy with yourself,
Life only gets better when we become better,
Make better choices not the same ole ones,
I don't react but I sit back and see the truth,
Emotions are unavailable,
Emotions are dangerous,
Emotional attachments get the best of you.

Stop allowing your emotions to control,
Control your emotions not let them control you,
Can't tell you how to feel,
But the way you deal with everything ain't cool,
Channel your emotions better,
The way you deal with your pain is unhealthy,
Being pain doesn't make you have to hurt others.

We bring the pain onto ourselves with our choices,
Not all the choices we make are the right ones,
What we think is right isn't always right,
The empathy of life is very important,
You gotta see things from every way,
Can't just see things our way,
That would be unrealistic.

Took the risk of branching on my own,
It has been far from easy,
I held down my own,
Being grown is being able to survive on your own,
I stay in my zone,
I can be around many but still feel alone.

Ain't nothing like being at home,
Being in a house isn't being at home,
Home is where you're comfortable,
Not every place and every person is comfortable,
The ones we can trust make us comfortable.

Clothes still in the suitcase,
Everything still where it was,
My body is here but my heart is elsewhere,
You can't help where you feel comfortable,
Can't help who you feel comfortable with,
The heart knows what the heart wants,
The heart knows where the heart belongs.

Depression will leave you feeling alone when you're in a room full of people. It'll make you not wanna eat, sleep or sometimes not wanna live. That depression isn't nothing to play with. I struggle with depression and just wanted to speak on it. Pay attention to signs. Don't ignore the signs, if so you'll have bigger issues than you can bare. The pain many of us deal with it ain't even fair.

Nothing worse than dealing with depression on your own. Listen to those cries, sometimes they're silent so listen closely and keep your eyes open not closed.
The things we don't take serious be the things that be the most serious. The lives of others and ourselves is the most important. Never know how much someone is really suffering.

The silence is biggest cry that you'll ever hear. The loud cries ain't as bad as the silent cries. Crying for help isn't easy but when them cries are calling take it serious. Asking for help is better than suffering on your own. We be in our own zone, suffering alone.
Them signs are sometimes are hard to read. No matter how much they try to push you away, pull them closer.

The ones who the most help won't ask for it. Ego and pride takes over us more than any disease or sickness. Depression will take over your life with the quickness.

You say you want me here but so you really?
It don't feel like you want me here,
Doesn't feel like home,
Feels more like prison,
Locked in a place where I don't wanna be,
Where's the key?
I need to find my way outta here.

Each day is a struggle,
I try to keep a positive mindset,
No matter what try my best to keep it together,
Not always successful with it,
But all we can do in life is try our best,
If our mental health isn't healthy,
The rest of us won't be healthy.

Many want me to seek therapy,
But I am my own therapy,
God is the only therapist I need,
People always let you down,
God will never let me down.

We all heal in our own way,
We all deal with things in our own way,
Nobody can ever begin to understand my pain,
Talking about it won't help,
Some situations we have no control of,
We just have to cope the best way we can.

Tryna to be a star ain't always wise,
Tryna to be the center of attention is wise,
All that attention you want ain't always safe,
Sometimes you'll get more than you bargained for,
Friends ain't always your friends,
Jealousy gets the best of us,
There's always someone who wants what you got,
Stop being a show off,
Keep your business your business.

The loudest one in the room is always on notice,
The weak ones are the loudest,
The strong ones are the most silent,
Being a celebrity ain't safe as you think,
Cameras all in your face,
Flashing lights all over your neighborhood,
Bodies dropping left and right,
The hype ain't always worth the cost.

Staying to myself has kept me safe,
Staying to myself has given me peace,
Staying to myself has kept me living,
Staying to myself has kept me from dying,
The wrong crowd will have you caught,
The ones who are the most friendly die sooner,
The ones who are the most thirsty die sooner,
The ones who love attention die sooner,
Don't risk your life over fame, girls and money,
Glamour ain't shiny as it seems.

I seen the spark in your eyes,
I took notice of the passion inside your heart,
I took notice of the love you show,
I took notice of the care you show,
Stop hiding how you truly feel and just show it,
Life is too short to hide your feelings.

I see more than you realize,
My eyes looked into your eyes,
My eyes saw you,
My eyes seen the realness,
What's true can't be hidden well as you think,
The lies are more obvious.

I can see you and through you,
You can't hide from me,
I see it all but nobody else can see you,
The ones you want to see will see you,
The ones who don't truly know you won't see you,
Them eyes are always on you but all through you.

Never thought I'd feel this way but I do,
I can feel the tears but that ain't coming out,
I'm crying inside,
This feeling is more painful than words can say,
The depression feels so real,
Life was so simple months ago,
Now everything is upside down.

I feel like I'm falling apart,
Where do I start to pick up the pieces?
My life has been shattered into pieces,
Nothing feels the same,
I made this choice,
I'll take the blame,
Something has to change.

The rainy days has became stormy nights,
Fight after fight,
Drama night after night,
The pain has deepened,
I feel like my heart has been torn from my chest,
In this life what's left,
Ever feel alive but inside you feel dead?

Family ain't always family. Ever felt like you were on the outside? Ever felt like you were outcasted? Ever felt like you didn't get in the family? It be like that sometimes. We are all born into a family but that doesn't mean you're family. Family is more than those who you're connected to by blood. Family loves you, cares for you and there for unconditionally.
The ones who aren't your blood treat you better than the ones who are your blood. A brother ain't always a brother. A sister ain't always a sister. A father ain't always a father. A mother ain't always a mother. Just let it sink in and marinate in your mind. Families aren't as close as they should be.

The ones we should keep close, we distance ourselves from. Let's put the hate down and let's share the love. Life is too short to have so much hate in our hearts. It's easier to love than it is to hate. Why spend your whole life mad and angry about something so simple? Is it worth it? What if they die, would you be okay with that? All that anger you're carrying around ain't doing nothing but hurting you.

You put your trust in the one you think you can trust,
Then it turns out you can't trust em,
That trust is more lethal than them bullets in a gun,
You can run from them bullets,
You feel them bullets harder than a heart attack,
They both can **** you,
The question is which is more fatal.

If that bullet hits you inside your heart,
You're pretty much dead,
You're heart is the most fatal,
Without your heart you can't live,
Nothing compares to a broken heart,
The ones you love the most hurt you the most,
It's less painful not to care.

All that pain made me cold,
The only thing I care about is family,
My mama more than anyone,
Heartless what I've become,
I can't feel nothing,
My EMOTIONS have been faded.

It ain't getting no easier,
Doing my best to hold on,
Keep getting knocked down,
Over and over,
God gives me the strength to keep going,
Who knew it would be this hard,
I surely didn't but that's okay,
No cries or tears to shed.

The struggle made me numb,
I can't feel nothing but what's in front of me,
The struggle and them growing pains,
It only makes me stronger,
The weak give up not me,
I keep pushing,
It ain't easy but nothing in life is easy.

Throw me to the wolves,
I'll come back running the pack,
There's nothing I can't handle,
I was built off the muscle,
I was raised from the struggle.

I don't want your body,
I want your heart, mind, and soul.
That intellectual vibe,
*** is easy but conversation isn't,
Can't converse with everyone,
But can *** with everyone,
Your body is the last thing I want or need,
I wanna feed your heart, mind and soul.

I can't take anyone serious anymore,
My heart is locked away,
I'm the only one with the key to unlock it,
The key will be locked away in a safe place,
Heart on ice,
That's what happens when you suffer so much,
That pain put me in a different ora,
I'm a different person all around,
Mentally,
Emotionally,
Physically,
Spiritually.

Once I see the vibe ain't for me I exit silently,
No harsh feelings just ain't for me,
Can't stay in a uncomfortable setting,
At least not anymore,
Because I've been there before,
I'll be go there again,
Learned from my mistakes so won't be going back.

They ask me "why are you single" ,
I tell em "I'm just chilling",
I ain't even looking or studding anybody,
I got trust issues,
I can't trust others or myself to trust anyone else,
There's no space for anyone to get close,
Sorry but I'm not sorry.

Slip them ******* to the side,
Let me rub your back,
Let me rub your thighs,
Let me rub your feet,
Baby I know you had a rough day at work,
Lemme ease your pain and ease your mind,
Lemme make you feel better.

You always taking care of everyone,
Lemme take care of you,
You deserve a break,
Relax baby I got you,
I'm yours so I'ma take care of you,
You ain't gotta do it on your own,
A man never lets his woman struggle.

You can do bad by yourself,
I'm here to help and make it easier on you,
You can lean on me and I'll hold you down,
You my queen and I'm your king,
I know you never thought you'd meet your king,
Never thought I'd meet my queen,
When you stop looking that's when it comes.

You alive but you feel dead,
Life just don't feel the same,
Can't tell if I'm coming or going,
I'm here but don't know where I'm headed.

I give the glory to God,
Holding on much as I can,
Faith is the only thing that keeps me going,
Without faith I would have nothing,
My life has taken a different turn.

Live and learn but is it my turn?
What do you expect when you take a different lane?
Something has to change,
I'm the one to blame,
I'm not igniting but I see the flames.

I'm not playing but I play the game,
The rain has become thunderstorms,
The thunderbolts have gotten stronger,
The storm much longer than expected,
Didn't see this coming,
I'm here to stay ain't no running.

You are a trigger for me,
When I'm around you I feel different,
Than when I'm not around you,
My world feels much different when I'm alone,
That energy we share doesn't feel good,
That pain is sharper than a blade,
The space just doesn't feel comfortable.

I don't feel at home but I feel homeless,
Being in a house ain't the same as being at home,
Our home has been burned down to ashes,
The flames burn sharply,
The ashes are burned to crisp,
Our lives haven't been the same.

You can't rebuild the house,
The house has been destroyed,
You can't even recognized things the same,
When you look at it things aren't what they use to be,
What's broken can't be fixed.

How can you love me but all you do is hurt me?
How can you care about me but hurt me easily?
Is it that easy to hurt someone you love?
Love and pain can't be in the same place,
If all you do is hurt me,
Then obviously you don't love me,
All I am to you is a possession.

The constant back and fourth,
The constant disrespect,
The constant insecurities says it all,
Stop trying to convince yourself,
Just face the truth and give up the lies.

Girl why you doing this to me?
I can't get enough of you,
When it comes to you there's no limits,
I wanna overdose when it comes to you,
I can't be without you,
Without you there isn't no me,
You complete me and I complete you.

Them feelings I'm feeling I never felt before,
Where did you come from?
Wherever you came from?
You just ain't normal,
You got me doing things I wouldn't dream of doing,
You ain't good for me,
But I sure don't want to let you go.

I was looking in the wrong direction,
I got lost but my faith was found,
Without prayer and hope,
I would've drowned,
The only life guard to save me,
Was the man upstairs,
I let go all my fears and worries,
I gave to him,
And he introduced me to something,
I've never seen.

Them thoughts I been having lately crazy,
Life can get deadly when you don't expect it,
Our lives can change quicker than you realize,
Everything that has taken placed is a surprise,
I can't worry or stress,
Life could be much worse,
I continue to keep pushing,
I won't give up,
Just keep putting in that work.

I knew the risks of my choices,
I knew it wasn't gonna be easy,
God has a plan for me,
I can feel something good coming,
Nothing good comes easy,
If you want something good,
You gotta take a lost to get the big win,
You can't succeed if you don't fail,
Can't experience success without failure.

Before you can walk you gotta crawl,
Before you talk you gotta listen,
Lessons are learned by paying attention,
How can we do better if we don't know our mistakes?
Know what you did wrong,
Before you can make it right,
What's wrong can be made right.

You ain't gotta be a secret,
You can be my surprise,
No need to keep secrets and tell lies,
Never thought I could feel again,
You changed all that,
You know who you are,
No need to say your name,
This was back in the day,
Things aren't much different these days.

The bond was so pure,
The vibes were so sacred,
Our connection was instant,
I seen something in you from day 1,
I never caught feelings for nobody besides you,
That's how you know what we had was real.

Never been no perfect man,
I always knew we were once perfect together,
Put you through a lot but it's all love,
Nobody could ever take your place,
You're irreplaceable.

Look into your eyes and I see you,
Not all of them can see but I see,
The beauty of who you really are isn't seen,
The elegance of your beauty isn't seen,
Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder,
Every set of eyes are different,
What one sees another won't see.

Those thick thighs,
Them beautiful curves,
That big ****,
Is not what that caught me,
Your beautiful mind is what caught me,
Your body is what I saw,
Your mind is what keeps me.

Many have great assets,
Not many have a beautiful mind,
Intellectual connections are forever,
You can become tiresome of a big **** and smile,
The physical becomes tiresome,
The intellectual last forever,
Let's keep this moment.

I never had it easy as a child,
It ain't been any easier as a adult either,
The struggle motivates me not hold me back,.
I'm thankful that mama never sheltered us,
It made me and my siblings stronger,
Life gonna get harder before it gets easier.

No time to sit around and cry,
Pick up the pieces and fight against all odds,
Beat the odds don't let them beat you,
Prove them wrong never prove them right,
Many always second guessed me,
But that never stopped me but it pushed me.

Keep doubting me and I'll show you otherwise,
If nobody believes you make a believer outta them,
I been destined for greatness since birth,
Mama always believed me,
That's all the support I need,
Everyone ain't gonna always want to see you win,
Doesn't matter long as you believe in yourself.

They will always see the bad,
But won't ever acknowledge the good,
Hate comes easier than the love,
Why I don't know but that's just the world we live in,
Don't ponder on the hate but embrace the love.

I took the shot and it was nothing but net,
Life is a gamble so let's take a risk,
Can't have nothing without risking it all,
Them L's I'm taking will give me the bigger win,
I see the future not worrying about the past,
Life is a game so let the best man win.

How you expect to win if you don't play?
The moment we start living and stop dreaming,
Is the moment we starting making a difference,
The fear of taking risks is what holds us back,
I sat back doing nothing for too long,
Now I'm getting into the game.

I'm the main attraction y'all just small time,
If you want something big,
You gotta stop thinking so small,
Life ain't gonna live itself,
Wanna a different life then live differently,
My life is on the uprise,
I'm done living for everyone else,
It's my time so I'm living for myself.

Don't apologize for making yourself better,
Not everyone will want the best for you,
If you can't support me then I don't need you,
All the hate you bringing ain't hurting me,
The hate brings me more motivation then frustration,
If you ain't doing something right they would be silent,
Obviously I'm doing everything right,
My name stay in they mouth,
Keep talking and I'm gonna keep shining.

The moment I look into your eyes I knew,
My mind couldn't deny you,
My heart couldn't deny you,
My soul couldn't deny you,
My life couldn't be lived without you.

I was blind to the rest of the world,
It was our world,
You allowed the unimportant to invade our world,
What's ours can't be touched,
You allowed the outside to invade the inside.

What's lost can't be found,
What's torn can't be repaired,
What's damaged can't be put back together,
What's dead can't be brought back to life.

Lemme please you,
I wanna cater to you,
I'll never tease you,
What you deserve is to feel good,
I wanna please your body,
I wanna stimulate your mind,
I wanna keep your spirits up,
I wanna be in your heart.

The ones who hurt didn't see your worth,
I see your worth and I see you,
It takes a man to see you,
A boy can't understand or see you,
The things you been thru he wouldn't understand,
I don't know you yet,
But wanna learn everything about you,
I wanna know everything about you,
You deserve something good,
I can be HIM.

The beauty ranges from your eyes,
To your lips, to your thighs, to your legs,
To the color of your skin. When I look at you I see many things not just one thing.
We have had friendship, companionship, marriage.
We had ups and downs,
Smiles and frowns,
Sweat and tears,
Losing you was never easy,
But loving you meant I had to let you go,
My love for goes beyond what I can show,
It wasn't the easiest love,
But it was our love.

All the women never meant anything to me,
You meant everything to me,
I cared, loved and adored you,
I only gave them pleasure,
I gave you something irreplaceable, my heart.
Things could've turned out better,
But I don't regret nothing,
It was all done the way it needed to be done.

No rings on our fingers but we're forever bonded,
Papers or no papers still be my only wife,
My heart will forever reign in your heart,
Moving on doesn't mean you're see forgotten,
Just means I care enough to save our hearts,
The pain has gotten the best of us,
No need to cause each other anymore pain,
Love you enough to let you be happy without me.

You can cut off my hands,
You can cut off my legs,
You can cut off my feet,
I'll still find a way to move around,
I was born in the war so I'm solid,
Military minded and heart of a solider,
Purple hearted but the blood I shed is pure.

No matter what you do to me,
I'll always come back stronger,
Came from a family of strong ones,
Nothing weak about me,
There's vultures in the sea,
Keep your eyes out for the sharks in the ocean.

The ones who seem to be cool,
Usually be the ones who ain't cool,
Play your friends close but keep your enemies closer,
Friends ain't always your friends.

As we grow older we start to learn,
We start to see things more clearly,
The more we suffer,
The more we learn if we're paying attention,
Lessons are taught if you're willing to learn,
Get outside your pride and get in your maturity.

As a young man I made many mistakes,
Wasn't the best example as the oldest,
When I had family,
Now I don't have family,
They're dead and gone,
No longer of existence.

All we can do is move forward,
And focus on what's important,
Not ponder on what has already taken place,
Don't lose sleep over things or people,
That aren't worth the stress,
Truth be told don't stress over anything.

Your life is more important,
Your existence is more valuable,
We put too much energy into things,
That we shouldn't,
Let's focus on what focuses on us.

We all make mistakes but don't let them define you,
Let those mistakes open your eyes,
Let those mistakes show you the right way,
You've done wrong now you can do right,
Let it go and let them go.

I try not to cry and tear up about it,
It's not that easy,
I keep my emotions hidden away,
Nobody can begin to understand my pain,
You think you know but you don't know,
I will never trust in you,
My trust for you has faded.

The best thing you could've gave me is gone,
Felt like it was taken from me,
There's a bigger purpose,
God has a reasoning for everything he does,
I'm starting to realize the reasoning,
It wasn't meant for you to be born yet,
This wasn't the right setting,
No matter what you were still a blessing.

I will always remember the small we had,
It will never be forgotten,
The time we had was small but precious,
It was a beautiful  we shared,
I carry you with each and everyday,
Tear up every time i think of you.

I wish you never left me,
You meant so much to me,
You were a blessing and a gift,
That moment we shared can never be replaced,
I can see you in up there,
You will always be a part of me.

The biggest struggle is when I'm all alone,
Loneliness is the biggest trigger,
When you spend so much time alone,
You become comfortable being by yourself,
But it become difficult to cope with.

The days are hard but the nights are unbearable,
Having someone to be by your side,
Makes everything much easier to cope with,
It won't fix anything but it'll make it easier,
I put too much on myself sometimes,
But that's just who I am can't help it.

Don't allow anyone to help me,
I help myself that's just the way I am,
We can't be anyone but ourselves,
Sometimes being ourselves can be hard,
Especially when we're so use to certain things.

Loneliness can be difficult at times,
But it's the best outlet sometimes,
You never know who you can trust,
One's actions aren't always as they appear to be,
Many have motives not always so true,
Be careful who you put your trust in.

Trust is as fatal as those we put our trust in,
I learned that at a young age,
Being let go over and over,
Being lied to over and over,
It can do damage more than you know.

It woke me up outta my sleep,
These thoughts and feelings won't go away,
I'm starting to think it's not temporary,
Never felt this way before in my life,
Life has a way of testing you,
I don't know what the test is about or for,
In the toughest battle of my life,
It ain't getting no easier.

Lord give me a sign,
Where do I go from here?
What do I need to do?
Why now?
Does depression run in my family?
Things were feeling better,
And then I got woken up with these thoughts,
It's getting worse not better.

I'm doing my best to move forward,
But keep getting pushed back,
I'm trying to hold on,
I don't know how much more I can hold on,
Lord help me.

Them flashing lights give you that PTSD vibe,
Many lives lost at a young age,
Every time the phone rings it gives mama the chills,
That late night knock at the door,
You never know what to expect,
When you're use to losing someone,
Everything becomes real for you.

Identifying the body of a lost one is never easy,
You never wanna face the lost of a loved one,
You have to face the truth,
Don't hide behind the what IFS or lies.

When you're hurting don't silence your cries,
Cry out loud and grieve the ones you lost,
No one can begin to understand your pain,
Life will never be the same,
You'll forever be changed.

My heart is in a safe place,
No love left except for my family,
Nobody gets me or understands me,
Don't have the tolerance for anyone,
Sorry but not sorry,
Love will eat at you like cancer,
It slowly kills you.

It's beautiful when it's good,
But when it gets ugly it gets deadly,
Be careful who you love,
Be careful who you give your heart to,
Be careful who you trust,
Be careful who you care for,
Life can show you more than you bargain for.

Your EMOTIONS can blind your judgement,
Take them blinders off,
Put on some glasses so you can see,
Love is blind,
When you're in love you can't see,
Once you're outta love you can see clearly.

Don't be quick to make an enemy,
Why not make a friend,
The ones we envy and hate we can keep close,
The hate can be transferred to love,
We hold on too much anger,
We can just release the love.

Stop hating each other,
Let's love each other,
Stop and think what you're doing,
Once you calm down you'll realize it,
Take your EMOTIONS out of the equation,
EMOTIONS cloud your judgement.

Women hating other women over some man,
Why hate her on what he did to you,
Make her your ally rather your enemy,
Let's come together not collide against each other,
Not enough togetherness in the world,
Let's create togetherness,
Let's end the war that's going on.

Married life can get hectic at times,
But it can be beautiful as well,
Don't get discouraged when times get hard,
Hold on and keep fighting to the finish,
Me and my wife have been through the worse,
We still keep fighting,
You can't give up just because it gets rough.

No fight will ever be easy,
As time goes by things will get harder,
Nothing worth having will ever be easy,
The harder the fight is,
The more valuable they are,
Can't have something valuable without a fight.

The price of love is priceless,
Never stay in a unhappy marriage,
Leave that marriage if you're not happy,
You deserve to be happy,
You don't deserve to be unhappy,
Marriage isn't for the weak,
Not everyone is mature enough for marriage,
Not everyone is strong enough for marriage.

If you don't feel in your heart you're ready,
Just do yourself a favor and stay single,
Marriage is a respectable gesture,
Not just another journey in your life,
Take it seriously not just walk through it.

The silence says more than you can ever realize.
You caught me by surprise and hurt by them lies.
I know you couldn't see my cries but my cries were genuine as my love was. Loving you has never been easy but has been painful. The pain drowns what could be a beautiful love. The toxicity has blurred the place of love.

Don't get me wrong the times shared are something that I'll never trade but memories fade. Love will forever be inside me but won't be the same as nothing ever will be. We both had a hand in the conclusions of what has taken place. I've forever seen the pain in your eyes but back then I was too into self.

As you get older and grow things come different for you. Growth and maturity plays a big part in our lives.
We can't expect everything to be the same, when we're aren't the same. Open your mind not keep our minds closed. Matrimony is sacred until that bond is broken. Once the trust is gone there's nothing left.

Your words spoken from anger and pain are more true than you realize. The truth comes from one in pain because they can feel it deeply inside them.
Never deny what's true to settle for something that's not meant for you. Accept what's taken place and what you're feeling and move forward.

This was very unexpected,
The pain is a pain I've never felt,
There's nothing easy about losing a child,
The moment I found out,
I was drowning in tears,
I've wanted a child since I was young,
I don't question his doings,
I just take it as a lesson as well as a blessing,
God has something bigger in store for us,

This broke my heart deeper than you can imagine,
I felt like my heart was taken out my chest,
My heart stopped for a moment,
I'm trying my best to keep it together,
But truth be told it ain't easy,
The holy spirit is what's keeping me sane,
Without my faith I'll go insane,
Outside I look good but inside I'm in pain,

There's no one to blame,
Life will never be the same,
Me and my wife went through this together,
We will get through this together,
One day we will try again but not anytime soon,
My pain so deep you can't see it,
Keep my emotions inside,

God gives his toughest battles,
To his strongest soldiers,
So the battle hasn't began to begin,
It's far from over,
We are soliders so will fight to end,
Children are in our future.

A man can't help but keep it all together,
You can't see my pain,
Because i don't show it,
That doesn't mean i don't have any pain,
I suffer each and everyday,
But i will always smile and laugh thru it all,
I keep my emotions hidden away,
They can't be found but they haven't drowned.

Don't be fooled by strength,
I am human and i feel as well,
I just can't show no sign of weakness,
I will remain strong even through the pain,
Those tears be shedding inside me,
That's why you can't see my tears,
Best to believe i be going thru it daily.

Don't be alarmed if I'm laughing and smiling,
I finesse the pain with laughs and smiles,
Many don't know what I'm suffering with,
I tackle my problems and fears on my own,
It be overwhelming at times,
But that's the only way i know,
They be telling me to talk to someone,
But I'm not into talking about sh*t,
I have my own process.

To understand me,
You have to understand my life,
You have to walk in my shoes,
You have to wear my clothes,
You have to be in my position,
You have to be in my head,heart,spirit and soul.

I'm misunderstood you could never understand,
My life isn't your life,
We have lived totally different lives,
Don't compare my life to your life,
I won't compare my life to yours.

My tongue be rubbing all over your ****,
Then the rest of that ***** I kiss,
That morning bliss,
I wanna lick on her until she ****,
Where you going don't you run,
Your juices is what I want,
I wanna feel you and taste you,
Breakfast,lunch,dinner and dessert.
You're the only thing I have a appetite for,
You got the recipe for whatever I need,
No need to beg nor plead,
But you're the only thing I wanna eat,
My favorite thing to eat and please is you.

I took one look at you and I knew,
You will always be my first love,
The love we once share was beautiful,
Felt like we were the only two in the room,
It was our world for a long time,
It was shattered for many reasons,
Things could've turned out differently,
But we didn't make the best decisions,
Many things didn't take place,
It only made us better people in the end.

Don't beat yourself up,
It's not your fault we both had a part to play,
Not everyone's love is forever,
Our season just came to an end,
The silver lining is we are better apart than together,
Better to be friends than to be enemies,
Why not have a piece of someone,
Rather not have them at all.

Stop holding on to what killed us,
Just let it all go and give to god,
What's gone is just gone,
Can't live in the past but can make a better future,
The past is mirror for our future.

Baby make a wish,
Let's make it count and worth it,
The feelings you about to take will blow your mind,
Stimulation is gonna take place like never before,
Physically, Emotionally, Spiritually, Mentally.

If a man ain't all about you what's the point,
Your worth is worthy of everything,
Let's put it all on the line,
Let's sky the limit but when it comes to you,
There's no such thing as a limit,
Long as you got me we winning.

The only thoughts I wanna have is about you,
Your the first and last thought I wanna have,
Nothing happens overnight,
But our vibes happened instantly,
The magic we create is so magical.

I know you've been hurt before,
I'm here to heal the pain you've been through,
I got the recipe for happiness,
I got the recipe for healing,
You deserve to smile and feel good,
I'm all about you so there's no limits.

For so long I was upset about it,
As of a few days ago no more existence,
I feel no ways about it,
For so long I felt it inside,
But I didn't wanna believe it,
Now I see it was true all along.

Sometimes we can't help but try to see the good,
But in the end we see their was never any good,
Don't hide from the truth but face it,
Hiding behind those lies only prolong the pain,
I know it's hard to face but it's necessary to face,
That pain never goes away,
It only gets easier to cope with.

I no longer feel anything in my heart,
Losing everything does that to you,
I have nothing to lose or live for,
Some would say different,
But they don't even know my pain,
Nobody can relate or feel what I've felt,
In this cold world I feel like I'm all by myself.

Them thoughts get darker than you can imagine,
Sometimes I just wanna escape it,
But I don't have the courage to make that choice,
Many think it's easy to do it but it's really not,
We all have our own reasons for doing what we do,
They think they know but they really don't.

They be like "talk to me" but what's the point,
You can't help me with this pain I'm feeling,
Only god can provide me with the healing,
In the room staring at the ceiling,
Some days I don't know how I'm feeling,
This depression gets the best of me,
I don't know rather I'm coming or going.

I get silent instead of getting loud,
No screams or anger in the space,
You stay out my space,
I stay out of your space,
No invasion of space.

Listen to my words,
Follow the language i speak to you,
My language is deeper than words,
Pay attention to my actions,
Follow my lead.

Stop making up sh*t in your head,
Listening could go a long way,
Don't judge me but get to know me,
You can't know me,
If you're always trying to judge me.

The symptoms of pcos are endless,
It causes many issues for the ovaries,
There's no cure for this but there need to be one,
It makes it harder for her to get pregnant,
It makes it harder for her Emotionally,
It makes it harder for her Mentally.

God has the last say in all of this,
Don't worry for those who suffer from this,
I know it's painful and draining,
Don't give up on having children,
It may be difficult but it's not impossible,
Never knew much about this,
But wanted to speak about it.

Many women are battling with this,
It can be easy but in due it will get easier,
Hang in there and keep the faith,
God has the last say not the doctors,
Anything is possible through the grace of God,
Miracles happen everyday.

The anxiety and depression can get the best of you,
Hold on to your faith,
Stay prayed up,
The symptoms will have you Emotional,
But there's nothing you can,
This is a test so just keep fighting,
God will see this through.

wrap them legs around my neck,
wrap my arms around your body, wanna keep u safe and curess your body. touch you like nobody else can,
pleasing you is always the plan nobody will ever get it or understand.

A boy and man are very different,
Only a real one will know the difference. I like the mix things up like a chemist. The chemistry be so strong .

Eat it like my last meal,
When it comes to you I always need a refill. Some say too much of anything isn't good but there's no such thing of having too much of you. baby I just can't get enough of you I want more and more of you.

I thought you knew . Ya blow my mind like some nicotine. It feels like a dream it can't be real . Talk to me baby let me know how u feel . You talk , I'll just listen. your beauty runs deeper than water in the ocean.

I wanna feel on you like some lotion. Mositurize your heart . Feed your appetite. Drink your juices. whatever this is I can't or don't wanna lose it.

Don't run I wanna taste you until you ***. Dripping like sweat , you know you're the best. I'm blessed .

I was prepared for it all,
Thru it all I stood tall,
Ever since I was a teenager,
I took the easy way out,
This time I decided to stand on my own,
It was rough,
It taught me the biggest lesson,
The biggest test of my life,
Brought me closer to God,
Learn the importance of faith and prayer,
Without those would've made it,
I'm wiser,
I see the world and people lot different.

Those who thought I'd fall apart,
Haha jokes is on you,
Never bet against but bet on me,
I was born to win not lose,
I took a few loses but I've got the big win,
This is only the beginning,
There's so many more blessings ahead.

Believe in me,
Not lose faith in me,
Yes I've made many mistakes,
But I've learned from them,
The biggest mistakes of my life,
Were the most valuable teaches,
Without failure you can't succeed,
I'm thankful for the slight failures,
It gave much insight about bigger success.