I should've been a better friend
I should've been there for you
I should've known better...
But as much as it pains me
To admit such terrible truth
You know I've always been
The narcissistic type
And had to make it
All about me

When our eyes met
And our hands touched
It was inevitable that
Our bodies would
Soon follow

Yesterday I took
A day off and drove
All the way to Berlin
A seven hours roadtrip
(Which I made in four)
Like the ones I used to do
Back when we were young
Just because you said that
There'd be some party and
It'd be cool if I showed up

Yesterday I walked
In the pouring rain
Around the Tiergarten
Like we did so many times
Because you were having
A tough day and wanted
To talk about it

Yesterday I've had
Some coffee in our old
Place in Prenzlauer Berg
And I swear that for a
Moment I could glance
Across that familiar table
Your emerald green eyes
And the wild flames of
Your red hair

I know it's kind of stupid
Keep coming to this place
Now that you're happily
Married and with children
Living half the world away
In America

But those memories are
The closest I'll ever be
Of seeing you again
And for that Berlin
Will forever have
A special place
In my heart

I'm afraid of failure
Of becoming a burden
But above all, I'm afraid
Of hurting the ones I love
And ending up alone...

Yet I'm here, I've shown
In the face of my demons
And screamed at them
That they'll never take
The very best of me

So I may not be fearless
I'm quite fine with that
For I'm brave

My body is broken
But doesn't really matter
How badly beat up I get
My soul still wants
To pick a fight

I guess we fighters
Are just made like that
We never really know
When and how to quit
We're too **** tough
For our own good

We just want that fire
So we keep pushing
On and forward
Forward and on

I craved for more for
As long as I remember
Tailor-made Italian suit
A brand new sports car
That penthouse with a
Postcard city view

So I sold my soul for it
Gave away my innocence
Scarred my mental health
Lost my very joie de vivre
In the process of chasing
Those shinny promises

But now that I got there
I realize that I fought for
No more than fool's gold
Useless junk that'll never
Fill the void that is to exist
Being a broken thing

My friends used
To always be around
Good times, bad times
It didn't really matter
Every day was a new
Exciting adventure

Fast forward 10 years
Our group is scattered
All over the world and
We've become merely
Memoirs to reminisce
On my insomnia nights

If filling the gap
Between the man I am
And the one you deserve
Isn't enough reason to
Get up in the morning
Then I don't know
What ever will

I've given up religion
After every church said
There's a special place
For people like me
Just for trying to
Make my pain
Go away

It's as sad as it gets...
To behold the world out there
Bursting with magnificent colours
While I'm comfortably stuck
On the other side of the glass
Drowning in my own inertia

Sometimes
Life feels like
Carrying a piano
While walking on
A tightrope

Today I took
The long way home
Added a few extra miles
To my beat up VW while
Listening to some oldies
And watching the sun rays
Gently finding their way
Through the trees before
Fading in the horizon

Today I took
The time to see past the
Darkness I was plunged in
To appreciate there's beauty
In the perpetual changes of life
For most things might never
Be as they once were
But what matters
Will remain...

You always beat me
At every game we played
So when I broke your heart
It was only natural that
You'd shatter mine
Effortlessly

Mind over body
Is what they tell me
Yet I can't help to feel
That's just placing
A broken thing
Over another

Lately I've been feeling
Disconnected from the world
It seems such a dreadful place
It feels far away from home

So I come to my safe haven
Read and write for hours
Write and read some more
And I know I'm not alone

For I get to see each of you
The outcasts, the weirdos
The misfits, the poets...
But above all, the kind

My little beacons of hope...
My people

Orange man says
There’s a special people
The ones chosen by God
While everyone else might
Just disappear abroad

Not pleased merely
By casting every race
Deemed inferior away
He now threatens them
With Guantanamo bay

But orange man can’t really
Mean any of this nonsense
At least I hope that’s true
Mustache man was a joke
Until it was far overdue

With flour, you can make dough
With tomatoes, you can make sauce
But top them with cheese
And add a little heat
And you can make magic

You once told me
That we're bound to
Be star-crossed lovers
Ill-fated by the Norns
Doomed to fail from
The very start

And so we remain
Perfectly unfinished
A bittersweet loose end
Beautifully haunting the
Back of my mind to
The end of my days

We can be strangers if you like
We can talk about the weather
Our silly plans for the weekend
Or how life has been kind to us
Trust me, I'm a terrific actor
You'll hardly be able to tell

We can be strangers if you like
Or at least we can pretend that
It doesn't shred us to pieces...

You spoke about leaving
So often and for so long
That I didn't believe
You'd ever be gone

After years of
Constant self-abuse
I've finally reached
My breaking point
And I don't think
Superglue will
Do this time