make noises in your head so you can’t hear your heart

.
It’s easy talking the talk
Show me you are more than that
Show me you are not like the rest

I will hang on to your promises
When I see your effort
When I see your compassion  

I will be on your side
Moving with your loyalty
Alongside our royalty

You repeat your mistakes
Disappear I will
Rest you will

Twice you will think
With the deck in your hands
Next move on your sleeves  

If you are the King
I am an empty card
I hold the winning act

Surprise you will be
When I hit you
With all the power invested in me

the bits of my culture
are the whole of me

every time it gets easier
you come back
yet no one is left but myself to clean your mess
when you leave again
without a goodbye

the damage you do to my heart is painful
it’s beautiful how after picking up my pieces
i get excited and am ready to scatter them again
when you pop out of nowhere

without a second thought
i swallow all your lies
again and again

not cool I would say
not cool

You wake up to a golden haze
Rays tearing through your light curtains
Reaching the layer of your half-asleep almonds

You stretch your body like a roaring Lion
Feeling the magic run through your spine and beyond
Relaxing on the loud sigh escaping your anatomy

You admire your ruffled hair in the empty mirror
Running your hands to clean the mess of last night’s terror
Struggling to remember the mystery of your 7 secs of nightmare

You crunch and munch on the sweetness filled river
******* on the last drop of heaven
Craving for more paradise to flow

You put on your pretty sundress with matching earrings
Looking like a princess you hear the door ring
Hurrying to open the door only so eager to meet the prince next door

You fix your hair now and then
Hoping he won’t lock his eyes with your distress sense of sight
Walking like a queen with butterflies inside

You sit across the view you longed for
Taking every chance to celebrate the most awaited day
Tearing your eyes away from the menu to only finding a beautiful pair of eyes

You struggle what to look at
Deciding between the plate or the soul of wholesome
Diving into the red wine calms the butterflies inside

You muster the courage
Putting your hand on top of his
Taking in the bliss and finally saying “thanks for lunch”

You walk hand in hand by his side
Enjoying the shores hit the rocks time by time
Stealing a glance of his deep dimples smile to smile

You see the sky changing hues
Yellow to orange to pink to purple to anything but blue
The sky is changing but we stay true to the view

You find peace
Calming your soul
Reliving happiness

You both are looking at everything except each other
Ending the night with no words
Slowly closing the gap between each other

You feel the butterflies returning home
The Sun is setting
The door is closing

After a bright day with a brave soul and a breathtaking view
I wait for the rays to welcome me into a new day
Sweet dreams

it's unfair to give authority to someone to make you feel a certain way

Complete or not,

It shines through every phase,

What a perfect thing with grace.



Stands tall with its glory,

I am sure it has many stories.



My soul retreats to its wilderness,

When the moon is kissed by the sun.

In the pinkish soft sky of dusk,

Another love story has just begun.



The sun might be too bright to understand the darkness,

The moon, however, celebrates its lightness.

In my prayers, I reminisce,

When I see both with bliss.

For whenever I see the sunset you cross my mind
Left after colouring my life

Too soon I couldn’t bid my goodbye
Too quick without explaining why

empty thoughts
drain my empty soul

Lungs are yapping for air
Even breathing takes effort
This pattern can’t be trusted

Heart is empty from all the over pumping
The color red has turned black
The way to my heart is now dry

Eyes are zooming in the dark
Imaging the impossible
Imaging the comfort of my death bed

Ears are still to the nothingness
Yearning for your voice
Deaf to the words that will save me

Lips are sealed shut from the overthinking
Words want to flow free
Yet the only flow open is betraying me toxicially

Here I am
Still
Pushing my luck
To see another day
Without you

Here I am
Silenced
With a loud mind
Pushing my luck
To see another day
Without you

… and then he massaged after months

my heart lost its rhythm  
my mind lost its focus

my fingers lost their control
my eyes lost their dullness

This heart of mine
Is funny
Gives me trouble
Aches
Loves
Burns
Smiles
Handles me well
Reminds me of terror
Is weak
Is full of tenderness
But it’s mine

summer begins with the sun
& ends with me in your arms

Keep the music playing
don't leave me alone
with my haunting thoughts

all the good things you said or did for me stays while I'm forgetting how bad you did me. those sweet talks could be an illusion but what you did is the reality.

The warmth creeps in
You holding me tight
Over my body
You take control
Eyes are locked
You become a part of me

Your name is on my lips
Your hands are on my hips
We are dancing
You are leading

I open my eyes
For when the dance is over
A look at the cold and empty side of my bed
Wishing for you to take me over
Over and over
Over and over

I am home when I see you,

Standing there with your messy hair,

Wishing I could softly run my hands in them,

Then remembering the distance between us is not only of minutes but miles,

Having you in my sight gives me solace,

Even if you are only on my phone’s screen.



I am home when I hear your voice,

The sweet echoes of you singing in your car,

I am not sitting next to you nor am I even near,

Just remembering how close we were on the call last night,

Keeping in mind the distance between us is not only of minutes but miles,

Even if you are only one call away.



I am home when our hands touch lightly,

The candy was a sweet lie which you saved for me to know you better,

Remembering the memory of you splashing water on me,

Wishing the cold splashes were not of water but your fingers,

Craving the warmth of your arms around me,

Reality is that the distance between us is not only of minutes but miles,

Let me then celebrate the only touch I got from you.



I am home with your scent,

The scent of kindness and uncertainty,

Three days around and you smelled highly,

Highly of something I would blush around,

The butterflies still fly looking for a scent of fresh sunflowers,

Forgetting the distance between sunflowers is not only of minutes but miles,

But it’s okay because it has to be.



I am home with the taste of your lips,

I have not tasted them but let’s see,

Guessing it would be the sweetest mixture of milk and honey,

Sweet enough to drive the butterflies crazy,

Crazy enough to cover the distance between us,

Hoping we will finish what we started,

Not remembering the distance between us,

Which is only one call away by the way.