Every day, a new sentence
prepared in our heads
We try to plan out our lives
but they never coincide
I'm looking up to the sky
With all these questions why
thinking that I'll get answers in reply
I can't seem to think straight
Thought I had all this sense
But I can't find the change
And every day I check,
that a new day has come
But I'm a song stuck on repeat
one that sticks in your conscious for weeks

Why am I not living life the way I should
Seems I’m stuck in traffic Morning and night
Work all day just to come home to sleep away the night
Is this really all I'm meant to be
Used to think I was meant for greatness
Now I just can't see, that being me.
Feels like I've left this all too late
I came unprepared to storm this gate
Better turn back now,
just let this dream fade

Always thought greatness
was where my life would lead
But now I see, I didn't need greatness
To feel fulfilled and succeed
Thought fame would be away
To achieve everything I'd need
But fame just brings disaster
and attention I really don't want
So I think I can be happy with what I've got

And this is no real story
Just thinking out loud
Through fingers, I keep typing
Hoping this will connect
Maybe someone out there
Needs something to which they can relate
And I've felt those feelings
where you spiritually connect
In others writings, It's a talent
Which is a blessing to possess
I'm trying to find that spark
That helped me light up the dark
Haven't written in so long
But I know this is somewhere I belong

Why am I not living life the way I should
Seems I’m  stuck in traffic Morning and night
Work all day just to come home to sleep away the night
Is this really all I'm meant to be
Used to think I was meant for greatness
Now I just can't see, that being me.
Feels like I've left this all too late
I came unprepared to storm this gate
Better turn back now,
just let this dream fade

Always thought greatness
was where my life would lead
But now I see, I didn't need greatness
To feel fulfilled and succeed
Thought fame would be away
To achieve everything I'd need
But fame just brings disaster
and attention I really don't want
So I think I can be happy with what I've got

I've written a bunch of verses
Unfinished works, Sometimes it truly hurts
losing motivation for something
you once so dearly loved
It got you through all those hard times
Now you won't even take the time
To write out some lines,
think of some quips and rhymes
Try to define yourself as a poet
Get those emotions out
With a pen and paper now
So that you can show it
And all those who need to read
So that they can see
there not in this alone,
They're in this with me

Why am I not living life the way I should
Seems I stuck in traffic Morning and night
Work all day just to come home to sleep away the night
Is this really all I'm meant to be
Used to think I was meant for greatness
Now I just can't see, that being me.
Feels like I've left this all too late
I came unprepared to storm this gate
Better turn back now,
just let this dream fade

Always thought greatness
was where my life would lead
But now I see, I didn't need greatness
To feel fulfilled and succeed
Thought fame would be away
To achieve everything I'd need
But fame just brings disaster
and attention I really don't want
So I think I can be happy with what I've got

©2017 Written By Benji James

Get into my Hyundai
I call it my Ferrari
It goes hard when I'm at the wheel
Take me for a test drive
I'll show you how it feels
A body so hot it will make you melt
I'll take you to heights
you've never even felt.

©2018 Written By Benji James

I can see the ****** tension
You're both expressing
Let me set you both free
That's why they call me
The love machine
I really like you
And I really like her
In fact, I like you both together
Let's add me
You know what they say
It's, even more, fun with three

Lips on lips
Tongue on skin
Hands run over bodies
I like the feeling
That this is giving
I need another taste
Yeah another fix

Eh let me help you strip
Right down, yeah girl
Right now, work with me ladies
Let's make love until the morning sun
Let's get sticky wet
Yeah girls
Let's get sticky wet
Hey girls you and me
Making love with three

Hope you're both ready
Things are bound to get sweaty
Switching out positions
Moans, biting, licking, kissing
Nail marks down skin
Lips locked, the taste so sweet
The smell of *** in the air yeah
Both **** fine, oh girls got it
I'm still on target doing alright
Aw yeah this feels so nice
one on top as I'm locking lips
Yeah switch it round
Move it in and out
Up and down
Switching in
Switch out
Things getting messy now

Lips on lips
Tongue on skin
Hands run over bodies
I like the feeling
That this is giving
I need another taste
Yeah another fix

Eh let me help you strip
Right down, yeah girl
Right now, work with me ladies
Let's make love until the morning sun
Let's get sticky wet
Yeah girls
Let's get sticky wet
Hey girls you and me
Making love with three

She's on her
Lips to lips
I'm kissing down the back
Yeah hands on her hips
Skin so smooth on both of you
Ooh I'm in deep
Losing control, bout to explode
Hold tight here it goes
Makeups getting messy
Their hair is everywhere
Still looking so fine
**** girls, you're both
hot as hell,
Yeah felt so good
You know it did
You know you both
made me feel like a king

Lips on lips
Tongue on skin
Hands run over bodies
I like the feeling
That this is giving
I need another taste
Yeah another fix

Eh let me help you strip
Right down, yeah girl
Right now, work with me ladies
Let's make love until the morning sun
Let's get sticky wet
Yeah girls
Let's get sticky wet
Hey girls you and me
Making love with three

©2017 Written By Benji James

Spent so much of this life
Letting my heart lead me astray
Following girls that never really
wanted me.
That's okay
It's alright
I spent too many nights
Questioning my self-worth
I spent too many nights
Despising the way I look, I talk
I ripped myself from the inside out
And there's nothing anybody could
Say to me now, That I haven't said to myself.

Wasted a decade
Putting myself down
Put a stop to that now
I'm lighting up
Starting to see the beauty
Beneath these scars
Strong mind, Strengthened heart
Courage comes from the depths of my soul
Not gonna end up trapped in another hole
I got all my cards and I won't fold

Twenty eighteen
Is the year
I turned this life around
Dropped the baggage
Weighing me down
Now I'm floating towards the stars
Light as a feather
All those storms I've weathered
Nothing but past memories
Trapped in the back of my head
Where they can fade and be erased
To make way for new images that fill my eyes
And be captured in this brand new state of mind

This is a new sunrise
Yeah this is a new dawn
A new decade
To take back control
Of this runaway train
Not a train wreck, just yet
Now that I'm back behind the wheel
Starting to get a grip
Get back that natural feel
The way I used to be
I'm still a fighter
Now that I'm out of the trenches
Got all these pains on the back foot
I can breathe, just look

Wasted a decade
Putting myself down
Put a stop to that now
I'm lighting up
Starting to see the beauty
Beneath these scars
Strong mind, Strengthened heart
Courage comes from the depths of my soul
Not gonna end up trapped in another hole
I got all my cards and I won't fold

Twenty eighteen
Is the year
I turned this life around
Dropped the baggage
Weighing me down
Now I'm floating towards the stars
Light as a feather
All those storms I've weathered
Nothing but past memories
Trapped in the back of my head
Where they can fade and be erased
To make way for new images that fill my eyes
And be captured in this brand new state of mind

Stains covered my face
At the end
All these blood-stained sheets
That was used in the cleansing
Of my skin
Now I'm feeling free
Felt good letting go of the heavy load
Been carrying all these regrets and thoughts
For far too long
Never felt better to say, So long, So long
The relief you feel when it's all gone

Wasted a decade
Putting myself down
Put a stop to that now
I'm lighting up
Starting to see the beauty
Beneath these scars
Strong mind, Strengthened heart
Courage comes from the depths of my soul
Not gonna end up trapped in another hole
I got all my cards and I won't fold

Twenty eighteen
Is the year
I turned this life around
Dropped the baggage
Weighing me down
Now I'm floating towards the stars
Light as a feather
All those storms I've weathered
Nothing but past memories
Trapped in the back of my head
Where they can fade and be erased
To make way for new images that fill my eyes
And be captured in this brand new state of mind

©2018 Written By Benji James

Twenty-seven years
Of losing out in love
Twenty-seven years
Of never giving up
On anyone I love
Full of hate, But full of love
Full of courage, Full of heart
I’ve fallen down
But I got back up
Got lost, been stuck
Found a way back out
But fell right back in

Twenty-seven years
I’m still holding on
Twenty-seven years
All the best parts of me gone
I’m still staying strong
But for how long?
Every day could this be my last song
Twenty-seven years
and it all goes wrong
Twenty-seven minutes
Bad lucks born
So many decisions
but I’m still torn

Ever since childhood memories
I’ve had enemies
I’ve lost energy
trying to fight
With all of my might
I’m losing sight
through all these hard times
Through every single line
through every rhyme
Through everything I write
You get a glimpse
Into my troubled mind
So appreciate the time
That I’ve put in
To every word
From all the hurt
In my heart
From all my broken love

Twenty-seven years
It’s taken to come to terms
With all, I’ve had to learn
Twenty-seven years
I’ve learned to burn
All the rage, the hate
Wipe clean the slate
Twenty-seven years
I’m still around
Twenty-seven years
I’m standing my ground
Against the tides, the crowd
It gives me a reason to shout
My passion out loud
Standing tall and proud
Before I’m taken out
In the final round

Twenty-seven years
Twenty-seven years

©2017 Written By Benji James

If this is ain't love,
then what is it?
Just another obsession to reacquaint with?
In the memories of a story long foretold,
in the midst of this dusty storm
,
the sensual feelings I've applied to life

have left me in the blistering cold outside.

Each time we try to comprehend ourselves
,
The constant reminder, of our dark paths,

Become one with the start of our lies and deceit.

Something long forgotten now stands before you
,
as clear as day
,
As clear as the scars revealed upon your face.

In between the lines, you don't choose to read, 

There is something hidden you didn't see.

As you're standing trial for past mistakes,

The sincerity seen, in each look you take.
We know another part of your heart breaks.

At least that's what I think, 

In this twisted mind of mine.

©2017 Written By Benji James

Feel the heat building up inside
Steam is rising from my soul
Sweaty palms and underarms
People telling me, remain calm
I'm shaking, to break this spirit free
No one can hold me down
Don't try to stop me now
You'll never shut my mouth
Gonna take more than a bullet to take me out
You can throw me in the middle of the ocean
I refuse to drown
As this earth rotates
I push against the grain
Drenched in blood
Found strength in my pain
Now you'll see the crown I came to claim

I was underestimated
I've been underrated
This is my statement
Printed in my pages
I've been underrated
Under sedation
Locked in nightmares
Trying to find acceptance
Through somebody else's eyes
Instead of seeing perfection through mine

Doesn't it make you sick to your stomach
The feeling that we get
When we don't feel that we are getting our dues
and we've paid prices with priceless items
Laid it all on the line
In this battle of life
Hearts on our sleeve
And through the ink, I've bled
Still didn't end up dead
Sleepless nights in bed
Pen in hand
Experience my life through my writes
Through my stories, You take walks in my shoes
Fate chose me, So I chose it too
And that's how it lead me to you

I was underestimated
I've been underrated
This is my statement
Printed in my pages
I've been underrated
Under sedation
Locked in nightmares
Trying to find acceptance
Through somebody else's eyes
Instead of seeing perfection through mine

Power through perception
life lessons through direction
Emotions through connection
Love through detection
Minds were blown through comprehension
I found peace in this eternal mind
I now know that I am all that I need to be
Now I see I just need to be me
Just relax and rest at ease
They'll take you as you are
Flaws and all
Just breathe
and let them see

I was underestimated
I've been underrated
This is my statement
Printed in my pages
I've been underrated
Under sedation
Locked in nightmares
Trying to find acceptance
Through somebody else's eyes
Instead of seeing perfection through mine

©2018 Written By Benji James

Where's he come up with his lyrical content
Where the hell does he come up with the song's concept
Does he strain his brain
Bringing up the past pain
Or hang on a moment in the heart
Of a situation
And I can't stop this invasion
They take the words right out of my mouth
How can I stop when I'm addicted to this
I can't just call it quits
Especially when you've got a flow like this
And some people call me the kiss of death
Some people just don't see the visual effect
And then when the storm surpasses
And they realize we gotta rely on each other to make all this work
And a lot of people don't even understand the words
And I don't mean understand
What the words mean
But what the songs I write are referencing
And I get it, it gets a little confusing
When something that runs through your mind keeps constituting
What makes you think about being so blinded to the situation
But you know you can make it
There all seeing what your starting to say and I'd give my life
Before I lose out on living and breathing the freedom
To say what I mean
Because I mean what I say
Do you follow
Do you understand me

©2017 Written By Benji James

Hey everyone,
This is not a poem. It has been a while since I uploaded anything
I haven't had much time for writing new material, I've literally been focusing so much on my youtube channel and just living life.
Last year Hellopoetry was a big part of my life.
All the kind comments and just you guys appreciating my work.
That meant the whole world to me.
I don't know when it is I will upload another poem or lyric
All my focus is on other creative artistry, that I have always wanted to do. But it's only because of you guys and this site that I found that new belief in myself, to go and try again.
There is still a long way to go in my journey.
And this is not goodbye
This is just, see you all soon.
Hopefully, I'll find some sparks and write some new material in the near future but until then.
I love and appreciate all of Y'all that have taken the time to, like, comment, repost and read my poems/lyrics.
Until next time, I'll see you guys soon. :)
Hope you're all well.

Kind Regards, Benji James :)

Hate that you don't want me
But love that you don't need me
Don't you hate it when you're torn
Between all these ******' feelings
Love that you hate me
But lately, I can't take it
And everything is recently eating me
I'll surrender to every thought
And yeah you don't care at all
But babe I've had my share of regrets
But you were never one of them
Our true potential is still undiscovered
But how can we work this out
When you're hiding in the closet
And I ain't trying to cast you in iron chains
I'm just trying to make a change
And I want you as part of that plan
So step up and give me everything
This was never worthless in my eyes
But you burned some scars deep into my soul
But all that is over, Now I'm feeling sober
And I'm feeling so right, right now
Just wish you'd understand me better
See I'm not trying to make this heavier
Then it has already been
The rains washed away all the hate in my heart
And my heart is still pumping blood
Through every part of my veins
And I still get the shakes every time I hear your name
And I would never trade what we have
But right now it feels like all we had
I'm just hoping you can take a chance
Look at me instead of just glance
And sometimes the glass just shouldn't be fixed
But I think we should in a case like this
I just hope there's still a spark there
And I won't stop until I trigger it
I can still feel the electricity in the air
And I know that I've still got a love for you
Deep down inside and I don't want to let it hide
Just hope that you can put a little faith in me
Because I still believe in all you are baby.

©2018 Written By Benji James

Why would I want to be like you
when you go hurting people
the way that you do
You know I try, you know I cry
You know I really hurt
deep down inside
You know I hide, You know I'm shy
Just don't go throwing
things my way
Words can hurt, I can break
but I can't hate
Because with every word
and every breath
I know it gets harder
to get up again

You can bring me down
Leave me in shame
But I won't be haunted
by your game
The pain you leave
Will make me stronger
I won't be the victim any longer

You really don't impress me
with the way you act
So I'm just gonna keep walking
never look back
Soon you'll be the victim
of antidepressants
Razor blade cuts
Cigarettes and drugs

You can bring me down
Leave me in shame
But I won't be haunted
by your game
The pain you leave
Will make me stronger
I won't be the victim any longer

Don't you see
you're destroying yourself
But nobody can help you
until you help yourself
You shouldn't have said
what you did
because what goes around
comes around in the end

You can bring me down
Leave me in shame
But I won't be haunted
by your game
The pain you leave
Will make me stronger
I won't be the victim any longer

©2018 Written By Benji James

Girl, my world is falling apart
The last light went out
now I'm in the dark
I can't see one star of hope
I've tried to brush these tears away
There is nothing left that I can say
to make everything feel like a brighter day
And I've tried out every single way
to find a way to make you stay
I still can't see a message coming through
Guess I'm left here in the dark waiting for you.

©2017 Written By Benji James

I’m still chasing girls 

Out of my league

Mumma always said 
chase your dreams

Even with all the impossibilities 

So I'm chasing girls every day

Maybe that's the reason

They don't want to be with me

In fact, it's she who said that to me

How can I choose

With all these fish in the sea

So many girls they're all so pretty

I want them all 

Not just one

Maybe I'm a little greedy

Still, think I'm cheesy?

Nah I'm freakin' seedy

But don't be fooled

It takes a lot to please me

So many cuties in this club

And I want every single one

Because I just can't get enough

Of all this lust

Let's make love, in this club 

Where's Ushers song come on

Girl, I want you, no you, no you

**** how am I supposed to choose

I'm so confused

On what to do

Oh well, guess I better make them 

Form a Que.

I want them all 

Not just one

Maybe I'm a little greedy

Still, think I'm cheesy?

Nah I'm freakin' seedy

But don't be fooled
It takes a lot to please me

Hey, little lady,

I think I love you

Nah just kidding

I want to *******

In fact, bring a friend to

There enough room in my bed

For both of you

Come on give me all you've got

Because your both so freakin' hot
(Haha)

I want them all 

Not just one

Maybe I'm a little greedy

Still, think I'm cheesy?

Nah I'm freakin' seedy

But don't be fooled

It takes a lot to please me

©2017 Written By Benji James

Razor blade cuts were just the start
He made art
by drawing pictures in his blood
With wounds so deep
So much room to breathe 

Watch me bleed

Feel my need

All attention on me

Do you see the tension in me

Can you feel the weakness in my knees

I've tried to plead

But I couldn't please 

So watch me bleed

Feel the punishment tormenting me

Why don't they see
all the pain within my words

Can't they see my heart on the line

Every time I write
take a trip through my mind,
my dreams, my life

I vision so much but all the negativity
has started killing me
inch by inch

Now this itch
won't go away

I've penetrated my skin with fingernails so thin 

Now it kills to breathe in 

And I can't seem to find my way out

Of the darkness of this stormy cloud 

When will the rain stop drowning me out
all these emotions swirl around like the rough seas

I just want them to understand me

I just want somebody to take a little more notice

I've got a heart that needs some love 

But the hates so strong

I can't find where I belong.

©2017 Written By Benji James

Never felt this confident
(In love)
Baby girl
It's not enough
To say I'm in love
I never expected this

There are so many things
I gotta say to you
But let me just
Start by saying

I wanna kiss you
under the waterfall
beneath the starry sky
(We can do it all)
Nothing so wrong
Could ever feel this right
Girl I've never felt more alive

Am I nervous
(No)
Got butterflies,
From the moment
I look into your eyes
Girl, please stay in my life
I've never been more alright.

There are so many things
I gotta say to you
But let me just
Start by saying

I wanna kiss you
under the waterfall
Beneath the starry sky
(We can do it all)
Nothing so wrong
Could ever feel this right
Girl I've never felt more alive

Is she perfect
(Yes)
Oh the way she talks to me
Girl, I'm falling to my knee's
Never been addicted
To someone like this
Your lipstick stains my lips
From the touching
When we kiss

There are so many things
I gotta say to you
But let me just
Start by saying

I wanna kiss you
under the waterfall
Beneath the starry sky
(We can do it all)
Nothing so wrong
Could ever feel this right
Girl I've never felt more alive

Every time we walk
Along the beach
At night
I'm holding your hand
Then our eyes meet
And we fall into the sand
Making out as the waves
Crash in the background
Something so wrong
Could ever feel so right
Yeah I have never felt more alive

There are so many things
I gotta say to you
But let me just
Start by saying

I wanna kiss you
under the waterfall
Beneath the starry sky
(We can do it all)
Nothing so wrong
Could ever feel this right
Girl I've never felt more alive

©2018 Written By Benji James

Never felt this confident
(In love)
Baby girl
It's not enough
To say I'm in love
I never expected this

There are so many things
I gotta say to you
But let me just
Start by saying

I wanna kiss you
under the waterfall
beneath the starry sky
(We can do it all)
Nothing so wrong
Could ever feel this right
Girl I've never felt more alive

Am I nervous
(No)
Got butterflies,
From the moment
I look into your eyes
Girl, please stay in my life
I've never been more alright.

There are so many things
I gotta say to you
But let me just
Start by saying

I wanna kiss you
under the waterfall
Beneath the starry sky
(We can do it all)
Nothing so wrong
Could ever feel this right
Girl I've never felt more alive

Is she perfect
(Yes)
Oh the way she talks to me
Girl, I'm falling to my knee's
Never been addicted
To someone like this
Your lipstick stains my lips
From the touching
When we kiss

There are so many things
I gotta say to you
But let me just
Start by saying

I wanna kiss you
under the waterfall
Beneath the starry sky
(We can do it all)
Nothing so wrong
Could ever feel this right
Girl I've never felt more alive

Every time we walk
Along the beach
At night
I'm holding your hand
Then our eyes meet
And we fall into the sand
Making out as the waves
Crash in the background
Something so wrong
Could ever feel so right
Yeah I have never felt more alive

There are so many things
I gotta say to you
But let me just
Start by saying

I wanna kiss you
under the waterfall
Beneath the starry sky
(We can do it all)
Nothing so wrong
Could ever feel this right
Girl I've never felt more alive

©2018 Written By Benji James

They'll never understand this thirst
So much heart in one verse
So much love, but never been put first
Maybe there is more to this than meets the eye
Maybe something's brewing in these lightning skies
Maybe I'm starting to read between the lines
And everybody elses conscious lies
Maybe this was what I was trying to find
Doesn't do any good to run and hide
That's why I take it a day at a time
So that I don't get stuck in this web of life.

©2017 Written By Benji James

It seems the more I look around
There are people conflicting in themselves
The hatred seems to store in itself
And there wandering around without a hand to grab onto 

Hope, is lost

We watch as they fall

Nobody knows what to do

This is what society gives you 

The calmness is now violence out of control 

And instead of looking for answers within them self

They start taking it out on everybody else

I see the anger the anguish
The public opinion clashes
It just fills me with overwhelming sadness
To see that Instead of handing out hope
Instead of offering help
It seems everybody's quick to judge someone else

What you heard sometimes are not true.
It could be fake like a smile I gave you...
the loneliness inside is killing me now,
Trying to look for your hand to grasp.
Your memories gives me hope in a world
where everyone is so easy to judge
And I've had enough oh

I see the anger the anguish
The public opinion clashes
It just fills me with overwhelming sadness
To see that Instead of handing out hope
Instead of offering help
It seems everybody's quick to judge someone else

I've seen the hurt
I've felt the scars
I've heard the screams in the dark
You breathe each breath
As if it's your last
Your forming in the shadows
Feels like you're losing your place
You feel like you're morphing into another person's face
Take these wounds that never heal
Take another pill to help you deal
Scrape another cut to express how you feel

I see the anger the anguish
The public opinion clashes
It just fills me with overwhelming sadness
To see that Instead of handing out hope
Instead of offering help
It seems everybody's quick to judge someone else

give me the shadow to lead the way,
A light to follow in this dark place...
one more cut and I'll be losing my way...
Give me the time of day
Give me the chance to show I can change
Take a look, open up your heart
Know the story before you judge
Not everything you hear is real
Not everything you see is how I feel
Sometimes we hide behind a smile
Sometimes we keep the tears inside
Until we unleash them alone in the dark of the night

I see the anger the anguish
The public opinion clashes
It just fills me with overwhelming sadness
To see that Instead of handing out hope
Instead of offering help
It seems everybody's quick to judge someone else

©2017 Written By Benji James

VERSE ONE
This conversation is getting harder to maintain
When you're finding every excuse to push me away
And you say that's what you do
Girl, I wanna be the one for you

I don't want to give up

Even though you say I should

I just couldn't live that down

If I just walked out

I know you're hurting 

From past memories

Let me help you heal

Let me help you recover

I want to be there for one another

You're shy and awkward
But you're so cute
And there is so much more to you
We have a lot in common
You're the perfect piece
That fits me
But something in you
Won't give a chance to me

You got your point across
You push away everyone
Everyone that cares
You didn't want me
But the weakness in me
Won't give you up
That's why I'm looking at pictures of you
Don't leave me
Dreaming what could have been
Dreaming what could have been

Baby have a little hope
Hold a little faith
I don't ever want to walk away
I wanna be the one
Who looks you in the eyes
When we wake up
The one who kisses you goodnight
The shoulder you lean on
When you need to cry
The photo memories when you smile
I wanna be that guy
The one that sees you
Without your make up
The one you feel comfortable with the most
I wanna be that guy

You're shy and awkward
But you're so cute
And there is so much more to you
We have a lot in common
You're the perfect piece
That fits me
But something in you
Won't give a chance to me

You got your point across
You push away everyone
Everyone that cares
You didn't want me
But the weakness in me
Won't give you up
That's why I'm looking at pictures of you
Don't leave me
Dreaming what could have been
Dreaming what could have been

Yeah girl let me serenade you
With these songs
Open up let me into your heart
Tell me all the troubles on your mind
Let me make them mine
Let our lives be intertwined
Let your heart guide you way
Into my arms where you can stay
Where you can feel completely safe
Let me take you around the world
With me girl from London to L.A.
So long as I'm with you
That's all I wanna do
Be the one who falls for you
Yeah I'm in love with you

You're shy and awkward
But you're so cute
And there is so much more to you
We have a lot in common
You're the perfect piece
That fits me
But something in you
Won't give a chance to me

You got your point across
You push away everyone
Everyone that cares
You didn't want me
But the weakness in me
Won't give you up
That's why I'm looking at pictures of you
Oh Ashley,
Don't leave me
Dreaming what could have been
Dreaming what could have been

©2017 Written By Benji James

What is a life?

Is it a breeze gently brushing against your face?

Is it a heart in which you feel pain,

Just what is a life?

These memories of my past, feel distant, faint

in this moment, a sudden feeling overtakes

Your questions, processing inside of your brain.

Just what is a life?

Tell me will I ever know the feeling of fate, faith?

What answers lay beyond the stars, 

What answers lay dormant
Inside of this tormented mind

Just what is a life?

Is it a spray from the sea
hitting your skin

These drops upon my skin, glisten in the sun

Just what is a life?
Is it a happy moment in which, I can’t help but smile,

Haven’t felt that kind of emotion in a while.

Is this life the laughter of a child,

What kind of wonder and bewilderment
Does this life hold in store?

Keep thinking all these thoughts

And you’ll want to know more.

Just what is a life?

©2017 Written By Benji James

Man, why are you playing with her heart?
Why'd you had to go tear everything apart?
Yeah man I still got your back
but can't you see that she's aching?
Her heart wasn't meant for breaking

You're so consumed by the drugs you're taking

Can't you see you need saving

I tried to give you everything I had

But now everything has just turned bad

Your ringing up your ex, telling her your sad

But how can you tell her about the new girl

Can't you see this ***** is breaking you to pieces?

Believe me, man, I see it

And this may be a little hard to take

But I am just trying to protect you and her mate

You can tell me that I'm talking ****

But I'd bleed for both of you **** it

Can't you see that I'm throwing myself on the line

Don't tell me I'm crossing the red line

Because I'm so lost in my mind

It's so hard to describe what I'm feeling inside

Watching you be ripped apart by all this

**** it's starting to break me down

Everything is crumbling to the ground

So where do we both stand now?

©2017 Written By Benji James

Drenched in thoughts
Decisions on my mind
The options I should find
Have become more inclined
To make me climb
For the answer lies
Deep in the dark of the night
That's why we must fall
To learn to get back up
But when this struck
It punctured every cell in my brain
It's made it harder to get up again
I've been a fighter all my life
But this time I didn't feel it strike
The fire in my eyes
Have lost all there desire
To be a high climber
Your soul divider
Has made me a weak decider
When it burnt, it left a mark
Deep inside of my heart
it left no air in my lungs
in fact, I don't feel the rushing in my blood
Can you feel a pulse
Can you hear a beat
Cuz I'm laying here dying
In this deserted street
I fell high from the peak
Only to wind back up on the ground
Hope was lost now it can't be found
Surrounded by vultures all around
Where were you, Where were you?
When I was lost in the crowd
Where were you, Where were you?
When I hit the ground
Where were you?

©2018 Written By Benji James

I miss the way
You used to sit
On your front lawn
Waiting for me to see you
So that I'd come and talk to you
You were too shy to knock on the door
But your secrets you told me them all
And I miss all the ways
you and I couldn't take our eyes off each other
You had all my attention
I miss that emotional expression

Tell me what happened to us
How did it turn out I wasn't good enough
I think about you every day
Tell do you even think about me?
And every time you were with another guy
The jealousy kicked in
But I couldn't let it show
I just wanted you to be happy

Tell me Baby, baby
Why don't you want me?
Baby, you don't know
What you mean to me
Tell me Baby, baby
Why don't you want me?
You're everything I see
You're everything I need
Hey, hey baby
Why don't you want me?

We haven't talked in so long
And I tried to forget
What you meant to me
But it seems every time I forget
Dreams remind me
Just what you mean to me
I don't know how to let you go
I don't know how to show you this love
When you're with someone
And all I want to do
Is hold you close beneath
These stars
Your hands fit perfectly in mine
Yeah, baby, you're always
Running on my mind

Tell me what happened to us
How did it turn out I wasn't good enough
I think about you every day
Tell do you even think about me?
And every time you were with another guy
The jealousy kicked in
But I couldn't let it show
I just wanted you to be happy

Tell me Baby, baby
Why don't you want me?
Baby, you don't know
What you mean to me
Tell me Baby, baby
Why don't you want me?
You're everything I see
You're everything I need
Hey, hey baby
Why don't you want me?

Oh honey memories ignite
In my head
while I'm laying in bed
I remember back to conversations that we had
I remember back to every smile every laugh
That we had
I remember every tear that you cried
And every time I had you wrapped in my arms
But there was once where I held you
But you wouldn't hug back
That's when everything
Started to go wrong
And I felt I was losing you more every day
Until I completely lost you one day
I don't wanna relive that again

Tell me what happened to us
How did it turn out I wasn't good enough
I think about you every day
Tell do you even think about me?
And every time you were with another guy
The jealousy kicked in
But I couldn't let it show
I just wanted you to be happy

Tell me Baby, baby
Why don't you want me?
Baby, you don't know
What you mean to me
Tell me Baby, baby
Why don't you want me?
You're everything I see
You're everything I need
Hey, hey  baby
Why don't you want me?

I'm missing you
And how we used to think the other people we'd seen
You didn't think any other girl was good enough for me
And I still don't think any guy is good enough for you
It should have been me who ended up with you
Instead, I guess I lost out
So I have to reminisce in memories you left me with
And I'll just have to deal with it
Just know there is nothing I wouldn't do for you
I'm always gonna be here when you call
I'll be there if you ever need help
getting back up after a fall

Tell me what happened to us
How did it turn out I wasn't good enough
I think about you every day
Tell do you even think about me?
And every time you were with another guy
The jealousy kicked in
But I couldn't let it show
I just wanted you to be happy

Tell me Baby, baby
Why don't you want me?
Baby, you don't know
What you mean to me
Tell me Baby, baby
Why don't you want me?
You're everything I see
You're everything I need
Hey, hey baby
Why don't you want me?

©2017 Written By Benji James

It was here in the meadow
Where I carved your name
Into the old oak tree
And we swam in the Brooke
until our fingers were like prunes
And I saw you smile back my way,
Caught a glimpse of heavenly light
Ooh you're my angel, my life
And I ain't letting go anytime soon.

So I pray to the sky
On this cloudless summer night
Oh star in the sky shining so bright
let me make my wish tonight
So I can hope, I can pray
That she'll always stay
On this shining summers day

It was here in the meadow
Where I held your hand
We laughed till we cried
Talked long into the night
Danced and sang all the songs
That we could think of
And you, You looked at me
With your vibrant gleam in your eyes
And it strikes me like lightning
A feeling so frightening
Is this love, Is it love
I don't know whether I can
Keep us together,
but I hope to god this never ends.

So I pray to the sky
On this cloudless summer night
Oh star in the sky shining so bright
let me make my wish tonight
So I can hope, I can pray
That she'll always stay
On this shining summers day

And it was only the beginning
thought she was going to be with me
For the rest of time
But all good things must come
to an end eventually
Even though we hoped that it wouldn't be us.
So here is what is going on just listen,
Listen to my song.

It was on a rainy day I watched her walk,
Walk away, Away from me.
Through the window of my house
Watching from my couch
Trying to figure out what went wrong,
Wrong with you and me
It's not clear why you left me stranded
And I don't feel any better
that you're gone, gone away from me.
I need you here
So I can hold you near
While I run my fingers through your hair
And show you sweet tender loving care

So I pray to the sky
On this cloudless summer night
Oh star in the sky shining so bright
let me make my wish tonight
So I can hope, I can pray
That she'll come back to me
On this shining summers day

So we can be here in the meadow
Where I held your hand
We laughed till we cried
Talked long into the night
Danced and sang all the songs
That we could think of
And you, You looked at me
With your vibrant gleam in your eyes
And it strikes me like lightning
A feeling so frightening
Is this love, Is it love
I don't know whether I can
Keep us together
but I hope to god this never ends.

©2018 Written By Benji James

Leaving on a world tour
Where I'll be alone
Surrounded by all the unknown
I got no plans for coming home
Oh, oh I'm not coming home

Follow the road
Of paved stone
Concrete laid beneath my feet
Yeah turn on the lights
I'll hit the stage
Surrounded by anarchy and rage
Like an animal in a cage
That's my cards well played
But god I'm glad
that I didn't stay
In this place

Leaving on a world tour
Where I'll be alone
Surrounded by all the unknown
I got no plans for coming home
Oh, oh I'm not coming home

Hear the crowds roar
Memories locked and stored
Some that just burn to the core
Never be the same person as before
Run away little train
From the thinking in his brain
Try to break free of these chains
Burnt by the flame
Bound by his own shame
That was the day
That the monster came

Leaving on a world tour
Where I'll be alone
Surrounded by all the unknown
I got no plans for coming home
Oh, oh I'm not coming home

©2018 Written By Benji James

For you, I'd crash through steel doors
For you, I'd break down castle walls
She knows how to break through 
She has nothing left to prove
And I've got nothing left to lose
Except for you 
I don't know what I would do
If I ever lost her too
I'd fight, I'd lie, I'd cry, I'd die
I'd stand by your side 
For the rest of my life 
We've seen the best through each other's eyes
We can read each other's minds
You'll always be suspended in mine 
We still have more memories to find
But tonight would you be mine?

©2017 Written By Benji James

You told me somewhere out there
Is my other half
Even though you were the one I loved
Yeah you lied, left me in despair
Now my heart is beyond repair
Not a day goes by I don’t think about how
I should have made more moves with you
Regretting all these things,
that is what I’m used to
All I wanted was for you to be mine
But that’s not what life had in mind

You told me that I’d find the one
Yeah you lied, you were wrong
I’m never gonna find anyone
You told me I’d find love
You told me one day a girl
Would give me her all
Should have known better
Fell for those lines before
Yeah you lied
Left me shattered across the floor
I don’t even care about feeling anymore

I’m sick and sore
Bodies aching
Suppressed my cravings
Every time I gazed upon you
You were ****** desire
Deep within the flames burn higher
Extinguished my lust
With your words
Left me feeling broken and hurt
Rejection left me depressed
And I couldn’t find a vibe
To breathe in new life
My wires were cut
Left for dead
A rusting tin man

You told me that I’d find the one
Yeah you lied, you were wrong
I’m never gonna find anyone
You told me I’d find love
You told me one day a girl
Would give me her all
Should have known better
Fell for those lines before
Yeah you lied
Left me shattered across the floor
I don’t even care about feeling anymore

All I wanted was to find a future with us
It seems you had other ideas and gave up
All I got left was a box of empty promises
A whole lot of lessons
I wish I didn’t have to learn
I’m laying in the dark
Images play upon the roof
In all the ways that I remember you
The taste of your kiss
The feel of your lips
Tracing the lines in your hands
Playing with every strand of your hair
Every touch placed upon your body
I remember every breath you took
I remember all the ways
You left me shook

You told me that I’d find the one
Yeah you lied, you were wrong
I’m never gonna find anyone
You told me I’d find love
You told me one day a girl
Would give me her all
Should have known better
Fell for those lines before
Yeah you lied
Left me shattered across the floor
I don’t even care about feeling anymore

©2018 Written By Benji James