went to see my doctor
and he told me to lose weight
I said " you must be joking"
"I'm feeling really great!"
He reached down to my shoes
And he then untied my laces
"Now, Mr. Turner, tie them up"
"And don't make funny faces"
"I want to hear your breathing"
"As you try to tie them up"
"It'll will be quite exhausting"
"And you'll feel like throwing uP"
I said "Doc, you must be joking"
"of your test I have no fear"
But as I bent on over
My feet both disappeared
I said "What is that thing there?"
"It's blocking out my view"
He said "that large obstruction"
"is your tummy, that thing's you!"
I stood on up and there it was
My god, that thing was large
I'd bet if I went swimming
I'd be mistaken for a barge!
"Can you do your belt up?'"
"Get it to the second hole?"
I told the doc "No Problem"
"That's a realistic goal"
I undid my belt and gave a tug
I then pulled and I fiddled
But in the end I just liooked like
A balloon squeezed in the middle
He said "This isn't safe for you"
"It's not good for your heart"
"So I would say a diet and some exercise"
" is what you need to start"
"It's not  a quick solution"
"You must change the way you live"
"For you won't get any better"
"If you are aftaid to give"
He measured me and took my weight
And he did my BMI
He said "You need to make this change"
"or else, you're gonna die!"
There it was in black and white
He didn't sugar coat a thing
I either did what I was told
Or I'd hear the Angels sing.
I said, "OK, you 've got me"
"I'll commit to what you ask"
"You've scared me lots, now tell me when"
"We get started on this task"
"I can give you tools to help get fit"
"But it all is up to you"
"Just eat right and go slowly"
"And soon you'll see your shoes!"
He said there's many plans out
that can help you lose it fast
But, you didn't put in on real  quick
So, the results  will not last
I went home and I researched"
Atkins, Raw Food, Jenny Craig
I knew I could lose 50 pounds
If I just cut off one leg.
I could hobble around on crutches
Until I got a new one made
I'd be right in that fit zone
I would not be afraid,
But a voice way back inside me
Said, 'you pillock...do what's right"
"You didn't put it on quick"
"And you won't lose it overnight"
So, I changed what I was eating
No more fried foods and no bread
For I didn't want to wake up
And find out I was dead
I've exercised a little
I even went out for a jog
And I thought I moved quite swiftly
Till, I was past by an obese dog
I thought "you need some help boy"
I sympathize with you
I bet you can't see four feet
While I just can't see two!
I did weights  inside the basement
Watched dvds on my big screen
I've tried yoga and pilates
I've even danced a bit to Queen
So far there not much difference
But my energy is good
I keep on eating chocolate
I'm not trying like I could
I went back to the doctor
To follow up with him
And I knew that my achievement
was going to be dim
He said "good news, you're down a pound"
Just keep sticking to the plan
I said that it was difficult
But I'd do what I can
He said it may be just a pound
And I bet that didn't hurt
I didn't tell him I looked thinner
Because I'd worn a bigger shirt
So, here I am still trying
Of weight loss, there's no news
But if I look in the hall closet
At least I see my shoes!

There just isn't enough febreeze
to rid the room of the haze
Of a dog ****, strong and silent
It kind of puts you in a daze

It kind of sneaks in, then it hits you
An olfactory h-bomb in your face
Meanwhile, he just lies there
He's wiped the room with **** mace

There is no middle ground here
They always smell like something died
Like he caught a squirrel in the garden
Now, it's rotting his insides

Dog farts, are a weapon
That our army has not used
In fact I told them in a letter
In their reply, they were amused

"We've tried to duplicate it"
"A killer weapon... stops the heart"
"But, our scientists just aren't able"
"To reproduce a strong dog ****"

"Thank you for your consideration"
"We'll let you know, if we succeed"
"We agree with your kind letter"
"dog farts escape and then they breed"

Sometimes when a dog farts
It makes a noise, he turns around
"my god, I smell incredible"
is the look comes from my hound

So, if you've never smelled a dog ****
And your dog just sneaks one out
Do yourself a favour
Do not feed him brussel sprouts.

Husbands, raise your hands
Keep them up if you love your wife
Keep them up if you colour your wifes hair
Okay, this is for the three of us that are left....


I did my wife a favour
As I do, because I can
I help her when I'm able
Not just because I am a man

I **** bugs when requested
I do the laundry like I should
I clean the bathroom when it's *****
And by doing so , feel good

Every few weeks I will help her
Hide the grey that she can see
I don't volunteer to do it
But it's cheap to hire me

A salon visit is expensive
Doing hair, and waiting hours
I just slip on my latex hand wear
And I have a bag full of super powers

Yes, I help my wife get couloured
I take the time and do her hair
I also, get it on the tiles
Up the wall and on two chairs

The dog gets covered just a little
The rug, a window and the bed
But, we always buy two packets
So, there's enough to do her head

I have a jacket slightly mottled
It's got a few brown spots, some red
I don't know exactly how it happened
I even got some on our bed

Just call me Mr. Kenneth
In my jumpsuit doing hair
I get it where I think she needs it
And I spray it everywhere

She comes out looking gorgeous
She's always happy with the result
She always looks a little different
Like someone who believes in the occult

If you're a husband who likes money
Save it, colour your wife's hair
Your part only takes ten minutes
You need ten towels, one mask, one chair

It brings us both closer together
My arms look like a leopard skin
All my shirts are slightly spotted
But all those spots, make me look thin

I've got to go now and get cleaned up
The carpets ruined, so's the wood
But, she's happy and we all know that
If the wife is happy....all is good!

Sitting at the table
Cards have all been dealt
The direction of my future
Lies before me on the felt

I'll play the cards before me
I have to go all in
If I do not take the gamble
I guess I'll never win

I'm a dollar short of holding
I'll ride the highs and lows
I'm a dollar short of folding
I guess that's the way it goes
I'm a dollar short of holding
I'll ride the highs and lows
I'm a dollar short of folding
I guess that's the way it goes

The cards can tell your future
These cards tell mine so well
A dollar short of holding
It's my fear I smell

Do I bluff and risk my losing?
Do I fold and walk away?
The lord, he hates a coward
*******, I'm gonna play

I'm a dollar short of holding
I've got to go all  in
I'm a dollar short of folding
With not gamble, I don't win
I'm a dollar short of holding
It's up to me, just how I play
I'm a dollar short of folding
To live to see another day

Don't you call me Bubba
Don't ever cross that line
I may be somewhat redneck
But, don't you ever cross that line

Don't call my sister Buehla
Don't ever cross the line
My sister, is my sister
And she's on my side of the line

Bubba, Buehla, Bobby Sue
To us they sound the same
You've crossed the line
this time, Bud
Those aren't our ****** names

I may be a redneck from
Below the Mason Dixon Line
But, Bubba is my cousin's name
It sure as hell ain't mine

You may say that  you're sorry
To some that may be fine
But to me, you're only sorry
Cause you got caught across the line

Don't cross the line with me,, no sir
Don't make me hunt you down
Don't cross the line with me, no sir
I'll run you out of town

Bubba, Buehla, Bobby Sue
To us they sound the same
You've crossed the line
this time, Bud
Those aren't our ****** names

Rules remain unwritten
They're known but left unsaid
You don't speak ill will of someone
Especially the dead

Keep off the grass
don't dare go there
Don't touch
and put that down
are nothing when you
hold them to
the people in the ground

You never ask a soldier
If he's seen somebody die
You will not get an answer
But, you see it in their eyes

They live with this deep secret
It burns a hole inside their heart
So, don't ever ask this question
Don't put the horse before the cart

Your grandad, earned our freedom
As did many others too
They fought for future generations
that means they fought for me and  you
Freedom is a concept
One that many do not get
It's a thing taken for granted
And that should make us all upset

The battles that they went through
both in real time and their mind
For a concept such as freedom
To which so many remain blind

You never ask a soldier
If he's seen somebody die
You will not get an answer
But, you see it in their eyes

Be grateful and respectful
To show they did not die in vain
don't ever ask a soldier
Don't make him show his pain

I was strumming on my six string
Playing tunes to **** the day
When an angel walked  on past me
Stopped and looked my way

You may say it's corny
But I fell in love right there
It only took a second
And it only took a stare

Do not use the "L" word
It's too early for that yet
We don't know where it's going
Because we've only met

She sat down and listened to me
Never speaking, not a word
I only played and sat and smiled
No words shared but we both heard

Our hearts were both connecting
From the sounds of my six string
I knew that I did love her
She made my guitar sing

Do not use the "L" word
It's too early for that yet
We don't know where it's going
Because we've only met

We played the game all summer
We progressed but really slow
Her love was for my six string
Not for me, that I did know

We went down to the river
I used an "L" word there that night
I told her I was leaving
Me and my guitar were taking flight

Do not use the "L" word
It's too early for that yet
We don't know where it's going
Because we've only met

Thoughts are overflowing, spilling out on to the page
Some are filled with humour and some are filled with rage
I try not to keep them bottled up, I let them all go free
'cause when I keep them deep inside, they all play hell with me
I'm not sure if my writing's good, but, still I write it down
Do I call myself a poet or am I just a clown
I used to keep things hidden, where others can not see
But now I need to let them out, or else I'd cease to be
About four years or so ago, I kept my feelings in
If I'd let them out four years ago, I'd really be quite thin
You see I had a heart attack, a small one all the same
I then was told to let things out, or I'd be exiting this game
He said "you're fooling no-one, your lying to your self"
"this one was a warning, the next will put you on the shelf"
I had to find an outlet that wouldn't cause me stress
I had to come to terms with me....and make my troubles less
I worked on through my issues and the pain it went away
And except for some small flare ups, I feel better now today
Go and yell at nothing when you're walking in the park
Just don't let people see you, go and do it in the dark
For when somebody sees you standing screaming at a tree
They'll lock you up so ****** fast, before you count to three
Take some time to calm yourself, watch tv or read a book
go and take some photographs, wash the car, learn to cook
For if you do what I did, and you keep it all inside
You may not be so lucky, we may find out that you've died
Try to live each day through as though it was your last
But, remember all the days before, think about your past
You are not being macho when you will not even cry
You're only speeding up the trip to the day that you will die
If this poem can give you anything, and you want to talk to me
I may be out, down at the park, standing yelling at a tree!

Born with nothing
Still the same
No baggage with me
Just my name
Don't like planning
For what's ahead
I'll still have nothing
Once I'm dead

Keep moving forward
Don't look back
Leave what's behind you
On that track
Keep moving forward
That's a fact
Leave what's behind you
And Don't look back

I live to party
That's my life
Don't tie me down
With a wife
I'm day to day
and that's a fact
I keep moving on
And I don't look back

I hate posessions
I's born poor
Leave your baggage at the door
I weren't born with nothing
And I want no more
So, if you've got baggage
Leave it at the door

I live to party
That's my life
Don't tie me down
With a wife
I'm day to day
and that's a fact
I keep moving on
And I don't look back

Day is over
All went well
At least as far
As I can tell
Traffic Lights
Green not red
And then I thought
Of what he said......

When things are going well son
Don't poke the sleeping bear
Don't even venture near it
Don't poke it, don't you dare
As long as things are going
The way you want...it's fair
To tell you....don't you ever
Poke the sleeping bear

Dinner great
The kids were good
All was going
Like it should
Out for drinks
then I heard
In my head
The old man's words...

When things are going well son
Don't poke the sleeping bear
Don't even venture near it
Don't poke it, don't you dare
As long as things are going
The way you want...it's fair
To tell you....don't you ever
Poke the sleeping bear

Lightning struck
She walked in
Jeans as tight
As second skin
Wife looked over
Then I knew
I'd been caught
Not much to do

I went and poked the sleeping bear
Stupid me, it wasn't fair
I didn't know that she'd be there
But I had done gone and poked the bear
One quick look and I was caught
Was it my fault that she was hot?
I didn't mean to, so I thought
So all this good, was all for naught

When things are going well son
Don't poke the sleeping bear
Don't even venture near it
Don't poke it, don't you dare
As long as things are going
The way you want...it's fair
To tell you....don't you ever
Poke the sleeping bear

The graveyard
had been redesigned
The walkways had
been realigned

The biggest change
At least to me
Was the signs now out
For all to see

Five short words
that we all read
Not keep off the grass
Don't tread on the dead

Genius,
You'd have to say
Don't walk where we
The dead all lay

This sign,
It said it best
Don't tread on the dead
Let them all rest

Keep on the path
Respects may be paid
Just stay off the grass
One request made

The simplest sign
The words stay in your head
Not...keep off the grass
Just...Don't tread on the dead

The grass is always greener
As far as you can see
but you always sit there whining
Why him and why not me?

A better job a better life
A better house and car
You know just what you have to do
If you're gonna get that far

If you want to make an omlette
You have to break an egg or two
You have to work to earn it
Not just sit there feeling blue

Nothing is a given
You rarely move on up by chance
You've got to get a handhold
Go grab life by the pants

Just sitting waiting idly
Never gets the job done well
You can not sit and listen
You have to ring that bell

If you want to make an omlette
You have to break an egg or two
You have to work to earn it
Not just sit there feeling blue

One who sits and wonders
Why someone else gets all the fame
Has never tried to leave the bench
And get into the game

Stay hungry, do your damndest
Do not strive for second place
But, if you don't move at the starters gun
You're not even in the race

If you want to make an omlette
You have to break an egg or two
You have to work to earn it
Not just sit there feeling blue

Back in upstate New York
she was a girl with stars in her eyes
She hopped a freight out westward
And tried Vegas on for size

Off strip hotels, little shows
Young Delores danced with glee
She was working in Las Vegas
the home of Jubilee

"Do you have a minute folks?'
"Do you need tickets for a show?"
"Will you be in town tonight?"
"There's a place you need to go"
"Will you be in town tomorrow?"
"We could send you for a meal"
"You just have to see our condo's"
"It's a real fantastic deal"

Twenty years upon the strip
Wearing fruit baskets on her head
Delores was a showgirl
Even though the shows were dead

She danced backup for lounge singers
She was with Wayne Newton for a while
She still had all the attributes
That made the tourists smile

"Do you have a minute folks?'
"Do you need tickets for a show?"
"Will you be in town tonight?"
"There's a place you need to go"
"Will you be in town tomorrow?"
"We could send you for a meal"
"You just have to see our condo's"
"It's a real fantastic deal"

Time went by as it always does
Her body said "No more"
Dancing in the big time shows
Had made her body sore

Options down in Vegas
For ex-showgirls were not good
But she wasn't going east again
Even though folks said she should

"Do you have a minute folks?'
"Do you need tickets for a show?"
"Will you be in town tonight?"
"There's a place you need to go"
"Will you be in town tomorrow?"
"We could send you for a meal"
"You just have to see our condo's"
"It's a real fantastic deal"

She didn't have the hands for dealing
The casino was her second home
But, she didn't want to waitress
She was just too old to roam

But in Vegas, there's a sub trade
One she had the smile for
She could still work in the casinos
And help get people through the door

"Do you have a minute folks?'
"Do you need tickets for a show?"
"Will you be in town tonight?"
"There's a place you need to go"
"Will you be in town tomorrow?"
"We could send you for a meal"
"You just have to see our condo's"
"It's a real fantastic deal"

Selling timeshares to the folks
Who come in all the time
They could get free shows and dinners
And it wouldn't cost a dime

Delores was still a show girl
But, it was not the same by far
But, she was still selling in Vegas
And Delores was still a star

"Do you have a minute folks?'
"Do you need tickets for a show?"
"Will you be in town tonight?"
"There's a place you need to go"
"Will you be in town tomorrow?"
"We could send you for a meal"
"You just have to see our condo's"
"It's a real fantastic deal"...

Can  you see
Just what I see?
The things that make you you

Can you see
Just what I see?
Exactly as I do

Hidden right before you
Is a woman full of poise
But, you cannot find her in there
Hidden behind all the white noise

Name brands and faux labels
Do not show off who you are
No one cares who's name you wear
Or who designed your car

Do you see
Who I see?
Strong and full of class

Do you see
What   I  see?
Something special no one has

Strong, yet hiding in the shadows
Keeping distance from the world
A chrysalis hiding beauty
Waiting just to be unfurled

You are special and I know it
I want you to know it too
Do you see, what I see?
I can only hope you do

Do you know
What I know?
That you're perfect, yes you are

Do you know
What I know?
I am proud of who you are

I got a letter from the government
A week back, Tuesday morning
It came in a grey envelope
It was stamped with a red warning

The envelope was tattered
And the words were inked in red
To be opened by recipient
That was all it said

I checked the name typed on there
It was mine, so I could see
John Augustus Reed
Beale Street, Unit 43

I opened it and sat right down
I had been drafted so it said
I had to report on Thursday
I heard a ringing in my head

I didn't understand it all
To me it made no sense
This plain grey mottled envelope
Sent from my government

I followed the instructions
And showed up promptly at the place
Something was asunder
I could tell from the man's face

I showed him my draft letter
Explained, I didn't understand
He looked at it and laughed a bit
This wasn't what I'd planned

He said son, is this you
Are you John Augustus Reed
I told him I'm John Junior
He said that's all the news I need

This letter is a glitch, boy
It wasn't meant for you
It was sent out to your father
Back in nineteen seventy two

Somehow it was mangled
Got lost along the way
Until somebody found it
And you got it on that day

I'm glad you chose to come here
Showed up exactly when it said
But, I think you now can go on home
I think it's best, instead

It's amazing how one letter
And you can take this to the bank
Can fill a man with honor
For that I must give thanks.

Guarding what it truly loves
A dragon treasures gold
Jewels and plundered *****
Deep down inside it's hold
A dragon guards it's one true love
Fire breathing, blooded ....cold
My woman has a dragon
Here's your warning...you've been told

Real or just imagined
My woman has a dragon
Deep inside,
How she feels

Real or just imagined
My woman has a dragon
You may laugh
But, I know that it's real

Guarding what it truly loves
A dragon treasures gold
Jewels and plundered *****
Deep down inside it's hold
A dragon guards it's one true love
Fire breathing, blooded ....cold
My woman has a dragon
Here's your warning...you've been told

Her heart burns like a fire
set by dragons breath no less
it's an inferno like no other
i have felt it...i confess

Don't ever cross that dragon
and go to where it lies
I have seen the dragon's fire
Coming deep from in her eyes

It's a mine field of surprises
An act of balance every day
Do you tempt what it is guarding
or do you let the dragon stay ?

Real or just imagined
Your woman has a dragon too
I can tell, because I've seen it
And her dragon's guarding you

Watched Drag Racing...
How
Do they
run in those shoes?

I dreamed about the future
and you know it wasn't great
Unless, I may have missed it
And I kind of showed up late

Time controls the future
turns tomorrow to today
just when you think you've made it
the future's yesterday

You can have a bucket full of wishes
You can have a bucket full of dreams
But, don't wait until the future
For it's not quite what it seems

Other peoples futures
Overlap with what you do
Everything keeps changing
So the future is not new

What goes around will come again
At least that's what they say
So if you want to have a future
Why not start out with today?

Tomorrow is a zephyr
It moves fast and it's gone
For the future is the present
by the time you count to one

So, take your bucket full of wishes
And your bucket full of dreams
Don't wait until the future
It isn't what it seems

My future's now my present
And my present will soon go
I don't dream about the future
When I get there...I won't know

Wishes and false promises
On moonbeams and on stars
A year of dreams and nightmares
Of newly healing scars

Dreams are a seduction
An illusion of the mind
Dreams are for the children
They are movies in your mind

Age tones down those images
Dreams forgotten in the wake
Dreams vanish in reality
And that's the form they take

A dream left in the storeroom
Of a mind, with room to grow
Will flourish and grow steadily
And be shared for all to know

Dreams, are our existence
In the real world and the night
Dreams are full fledged wishes
That will die if not made right

Never lose the child
Keep dreams and wishes near
Keep fairy dust in packets
Of the darkness have no fear

Dreams are just illusion
but illusion isn't real
a heart can be un-broken
if you dream that love is real

share your dreams and feelings
write them out and read them too
never lose the dreams or wishes
they keep the child light in you.

I'm drinking for tomorrow
I gave up drinking for today
Because tomorrow never comes
Or so they say

I figure if I'm drinking
and tomorrow does arrive
then I have found a new way to survive

I was drinking yesterday
towards tomorrow, now today
It's a deep dark endless circle
that keeps tomorrow far away

I'm going to continue
Until tomorrow is today
though tomorrow never comes
or so they say

Somewhere there's a bottle
with my name there on the label
I have to find the tavern
and I have to find that table
one day I will find it
as long as I am able
to reach into tomorrow from today

so, right now I do my drinking
for tomorrow, not today
I did some drinking yesterday
but, that's now far away
I'll try to reach tomorrow from today

it is an endless circle
on a track without a train
tomorrow holds the sunshine
but today is filled with rain
one day I know i'll reach it
and forever I will gain
the fact I reached tomorrow from today

Sitting in my trailer
Sleeveless shirt and cut off jeans
Chasing each tall *****
With some Jack and shots of Beam
Struggling with my issues
In the past and from today
Sitting in my trailer
Drinking my tomorrows all away

Another day of heartbreak
I got dumped, what the hell
There was not even a phone call
It was by electronic mail
Bits and bytes of rejection
flying through electronic space
Just to tell me "I don't love you"
I got emailed in the face

Sitting in my trailer
Sleeveless shirt and cut off jeans
Chasing each tall *****
With some Jack and shots of Beam
Struggling with my issues
In the past and from today
Sitting in my trailer
Drinking my tomorrows all away

A week ago I was fired
Went to work like every day
found the door locked and all boarded
He ******* off with all my pay
No notice, and no phone call
Just a sign upon the door
A cardboard notice of rejection
Saying "you don't work here no more"

Sitting in my trailer
Sleeveless shirt and cut off jeans
Chasing each tall *****
With some Jack and shots of Beam
Struggling with my issues
In the past and from today
Sitting in my trailer
Drinking my tomorrows all away

My dog ran off last weekend
Left the house and ain't come back
He ran off with that pack of dogs
And he ain't coming back
I bought him as a puppy
Now he's left and he's long gone
But he left a pile of rejection
On the corner of my lawn

Sitting in my trailer
Sleeveless shirt and cut off jeans
Chasing each tall *****
With some Jack and shots of Beam
Struggling with my issues
In the past and from today
Sitting in my trailer
Drinking my tomorrows all away

My tomorrow's may be better
But then again, I'm not so sure
I've got the blues from this rejection
And I don't think there's a cure
so I sit here in my trailer
Drinking the same thing every day
Sitting in my ripped t-shirt
Drinking all my tomorrows away

what doesn't **** you makes you stronger
you'll never know unless you try
face your demons and live longer
if you don't you'll surely die

Susie wilkins had some problems
tried to keep them all at bay
kept her secrets deep inside
but sometimes they would want to play

If you've toasted with the devil
he'll get your soul with just one glass
drink with him, he'll find your weakness
he'll get your soul, with just one glass

Susie thought she'd beat the needle
many years, the scars were healed
but, just one lonely drink with our dear devil
and all her demons were revealed

Susie, went back to her trailer
Another drink and then she'd try
One more needle couldn't hurt her
Her secrets out, and so she'll die

Otis Watson was a coward
Hit his wife for him to please
No one ever really wondered
Why she always wore long sleeves

He got his fill from all the torment
But, in the end  he needed more
A simple punch would not appease him
To him, she was a cheating *****

If you've toasted with the devil
he'll get your soul with just one glass
drink with him, he'll find your weakness
he'll get your soul, with just one glass


A little man with many demons
A simple drink with you know who
His inner issues had now surfaced
The devil now would get his due

He came home drunk his wife was waiting
She knew the beating that what would come
He came in hard his fists were flailing
As he met her brand new gun

There'll always be another bottle
And there will be another name
Just sell your soul and tell your demons
Just drink with him, it's all a game

Life is not a game of simple
It doesn't take a lot to lose
But if you're drinking with the devil
To him your demons are old news

If you've toasted with the devil
he'll get your soul with just one glass
drink with him, he'll find your weakness
he'll get your soul, with just one glass

Remember back to long ago
When they taught us all in school
That when we heard the air raid siren
Duck and Cover was the rule

The times they are a'changing
And the rules are still the same
When you hear that air raid siren
Duck and Cover's not a game

Duck and Cover Buddy
See the flash and go to ground
Don't speak, just Duck and Cover
Duck and Cover, at the sound
It may not be a siren
It may be in your head
So, Duck and Cover buddy
Duck and Cover or you're dead

There's times in every marriage
When it's best to turn away
When silence is a virtue
It's best just not to say
Keep Quiet if it's possible
Say very little if you must
You know deep down what you have to do
Remember back and just...


Duck and Cover Buddy
See the flash and go to ground
Don't speak, just Duck and Cover
Duck and Cover, at the sound
It may not be a siren
It may be in your head
So, Duck and Cover buddy
Duck and Cover or you're dead

Questions left unanswered
Leave you open to a fight
Choose your battles wisely
No response is right
There's the ever dreaded question
Do I look fat in this?
Compared to what's no answer
The thing to do is this...


Duck and Cover Buddy
See the flash and go to ground
Don't speak, just Duck and Cover
Duck and Cover, at the sound
It may not be a siren
It may be in your head
So, Duck and Cover buddy
Duck and Cover or you're dead


Duck and Cover Buddy
See the flash and go to ground
Don't speak, just Duck and Cover
Duck and Cover, at the sound
It may not be a siren
It may be in your head
So, Duck and Cover buddy
Duck and Cover or you're dead

Back behind Gianni's
There was no one to be found
The alleyway was quiet
You could not hear a sound

The frost had not yet burned off
The alleyway was wet
The deliveries had not been made
No one was moving yet

In the sky  a rarity
Both sun and moon were out
But seen by just night creatures
Since no one was about

The back window to Gianni's
Opened to where Jim slept
There was garbage in the doorway
Since it had not yet been swept

The moon was getting lower
The sun just in the sky
The silence was then broken
By a blackbird flying by

The bird woke up the Bluesman
with his early morning call
And he watched the Bluesman set up
Perched up high upon a wall

The Bluesman had his guitar
Wiped some moisture off  his crate
Another blackbird landed
A rat peeked out from a drain grate

The Bluesman started playing
Singing low, just barely heard
More animals were showing up
And they took in every word

His medicine beside him
In a flask, engraved "For Dad"
His voice was smooth and smoky
You could hear him, just a tad

More birds came for the concert
More rats, some squirrels too
No humans yet were moving
In the early morning dew

He sang as he was known too
To no one special, just the sky
Songs of revelation
Songs of watching people die

The small flock that had gathered
Watched The Bluesman, moved a bit
As he took sips from his medicine
Not a single song...a hit

The world was just now waking
But The Bluesman didn't care
He was doing what he always did
Singing softly to the air

Normally, the street would fill
As word would spread around
That the Bluesman was out playing
But, today...no one was found

The window to Gianni's
Let Jim lie in bed and dream
That he heard the Bluesman singing
In his room, on a sun beam

The birds all flew away at once
The was movement in behind
Life was coming to the street
Where at night the vermin dined

The Bluesman packed his kit up
Snuck away from the day light
To sleep and rest his weary bones
To venture forth again that night

The rats went to the sewers
The birds had flown away
The squirrels, they were also gone
And the street began it's day

Jim looked out his window
The alley empty, no one thee
Where while Jim thought he was dreaming
The Bluesman sang songs to the air

An early morning concert
Full of music, 'neath the sun
A concert heard by many
A concert just for one

i'm standing by the marker stone
feeling wind upon my face
listening to the echoes from the grave
i feel the tears freeze on my cheeks
from the wind upon my face
as i listen to the echoes from the grave

I'm in a darkened corner of the graveyard
It's overgrown and not well kept
It's been a long time since a visitor
Has on these markers wept

I feel the spirits all around me here
I hear their voices on the wind
There is not a single angel here
These are souls who all have sinned

The grass has grown halfway up the stone
You see the name but not the years
It's been decades since any marker here
Has been whetted down with tears

I tend the grass and **** growth
Cut it back right to the ground
And except for ghostly echoes
I do not hear a sound

The man here was my father once
Though I don't recall his face
But, here he lies, worm food and dust
In this long forgotten place

The voices of other souls do float
Waiting for someone to show
But, their families died out years back
And those left, they do not know

I hear them as they call out names
Frozen snippets lost in time
And though I am on my father's grave
Nobody calls out mine

i'm standing by the marker stone
feeling wind upon my face
listening to the echoes from the grave
i feel the tears freeze on my cheeks
from the wind upon my face
as i listen to the echoes from the grave

Days pass by and people change
Some for better, some for not
You don't know why you're together
You were in love, but now you're not
To see each other daily
Is this the life you bought?
You've gone different directions
You were in love, but now your'e not

Once day you were a couple
Your lives were full of fun and smiles
To stop each others heartbreak
You'd walk a million miles
But, now the light has dimmed
You've gone and switched the dials
To get away from one another
You'd walk a million miles

Once you had love
Much stronger than
Any love you've ever known
Now, you just get on with life
No affection ever shown
Your kisses leave a bitter taste
Your disdain for each has grown
You stay away and live your lives
You're happier alone

It's a love story familiar
With too many folks it seems
You fall in love, get married
And you share all of your dreams
But real life comes, And people change
Some for better, some for worse
Now, you look upon your marriage
As a god forsaken curse

Being happy's not a given
It takes work and lots of time
But, the end result is worth it
Even with all of the cryin'
You know that change is coming
Things aren't always status quo
So, embrace the change together
It's more fun with one you know

Every morning my day starts
With nothing on my page
But, the book I write as time goes on
Is thicker as I age

Everyday I learn some more
And I fill the page with ink
With things that have me questioning
Just the way I think

Empty pages surrounded me
When I was just a youth
But, if I sit and read them now
I find more of the truth

I didn't know a thing back then
In fact I know less than before
So, I fill the pages with my questions
That's what the book is for

Things I loved no longer here
People who've moved on
Times of truly reckoning
Those times have come and gone

Tomorrow is another day
I guess I'll write some more
I'll fill the empty pages
For that's just what they're for

I woke up feeling morning pain
Another barroom brawl
I didn't make my bed last night
I slept out in the hall

I made it to the correct floor
I just couldn't find my keys
I can't keep living life like this
Can someone help me please?

I'm sick of empty promises
Every bottle seems to be
An enigma in a riddle
And they all keep calling me
I'm sick of empty promises
And of bottles holding dreams
My life's an Escher painting,
So, it seems

Different bars, the same result
I always wake up ******
Sunday Morning Sunshine hurts
and I'm always here alone

I am tired of the drinking
Of the searching, of the fight
But, I end up every morning
Still feeling like last night

I'm sick of empty promises
Every bottle seems to be
An enigma in a riddle
And they all keep calling me
I'm sick of empty promises
And of bottles holding dreams
My life's an Escher painting,
So, it seems

I wake up in dark back alleys
And if I make it home at all
I end up in the stairway
Sleeping, curled up in a ball

I'm not looking for redemption
Just a way to stop the sounds
Of the bottled empty promises
Before I'm in the ground

I'm sick of empty promises
Every bottle seems to be
An enigma in a riddle
And they all keep calling me
I'm sick of empty promises
And of bottles holding dreams
My life's an Escher painting,
So, it seems

You've met the people in my mind
They live upon The Street
It's near nowhere special anywhere
They don't know the word defeat
We all know people like them
And I hope it jogged your brain
Maybe they reminded you of someone else
And if they did, I'm glad you came
The bartender and Bluesman
Harry Cooper and Old Cy
The old man at the graveyard
And all the other passers by
They're all a work of fiction
But, they're people we all know
We all know a street a bit like this
No matter where we go
I hope that you enjoyed them
And I hope some made you think
I hope some made you smile
And others brought you to the brink
These people are inside me
Their stories needed to be told
But now that you have read them
They are your stories now to hold
I thank you for your patience
And I appreciate the time
You walked in a mind's garden
And I'm glad that you chose mine.
Thanks for enjoying "The Street" and it's people.

Every kiss begins with Kay..
Kay must be real easy!!!

I am not a gambler
I might lie some, that's a sin
But, I am not a gambler
For a gambler thinks that some time he may win

Every thing you do involves selection
From picking what show to watch
To picking who will win the next election

There are two sides to every coin
You either stay or you get going
It doesn't matter much which one you choose
If the flop is ******
And the river comes up dry
You know that as a gambler ....son....you lose

You gamble on a ticket picked
From the boxes that you ticked
You roll the dice and hope it comes up right
But, gambling is gambling
I don't want to hear the rambling
I know you've crossed your fingers really tight

It doesn't matter what you say
I don't gamble, I don't play
You made the choice to abstain...heads or tales
But come the night of the big ***
You sit and pray with all you've got
hoping your numbers don't come up  chewing your nails

A gambler knows just what the odds are
A good one gets out, doesn't go far
But he sits and gambles all the same
It doesn't matter what you play
You have the choice to leave or stay
And if you lose, there's only you to blame

I admit I gamble some
Money goes and money comes
And if I lose too much, I take it hard
I can't believe that I sit here
Behind the smoke and day old beer
Playing for my life with a flipped card....

I am not a gambler
I might lie some, that's a sin
But, I am not a gambler
For a gambler thinks that some time he may win

Everyone's a sinner
I'm certain that is true
I am...that's a given
and I guess then...so are you

Argue if you want to
There's ten, so it's not hard
To break one on occasion
It doesn't hurt, and you're not scarred

I see bony little fingers
Twisting little tiny beads
Praying quiet for redemption
Rubbing little holy seeds

Sitting in the church pews
With rosaries in hand
Little wrinkled people
In churches all across the land

Some will pray in silence
Not a whisper will you hear
They're addicted to the motion
Of the beads they keep so near

I hope they get to heaven
If the beads help, then they win
They sit praying for redemption
From the earthly hell they're in

Some may light a candle
For a loved one they have lost
Then, they sit and ask redemption
No matter what the cost

Little wrinkled fingers
Working nimbly at the beads
They say their prayers in silence
Clutching tightly at their seeds.

Black, like a shark
Dead....who's in there?
What are you thinking?
Are you in there?

Green, smiling bright
Open to the world
And all it's glory
Your soul unfurled

Eyes, tell a story
And hide one too
What colour are yours?
For mine are blue
Eyes tell a story
They open doors
I'll tell my story
If you tell yours

Red, worn and raw
sore and tired
Have you been crying?
Or are you just wired?

Brown, smiling, somber
Showing your pain
Hiding your hurt
From loves refrain

Eyes, tell a story
And hide one too
What colour are yours?
For mine are blue
Eyes tell a story
They open doors
I'll tell my story
If you tell yours

Puffy, swollen shut
Were you in a fight?
Between two friends?
Or two lovers in the night?

Closed, showing nothing
Are you hiding from what is said
Or are you like a shark...?
with eyes black and dead

Eyes, tell a story
And hide one too
What colour are yours?
For mine are blue
Eyes tell a story
They open doors
I'll tell my story
If you tell yours.

I looked into my mirror
Saw my grandad looking back
I wondered where'd he come from
And how'd I send him back

I didn't see myself there
And my dad's not there at all
I know I saw my grandad
My dad...he's not that tall.

I know I've got dads smile
And I've still got my own hair
But, staring from my mirrow
I saw my Grandad standing there

I know it wasn't me there
I do not look that bad
The face in the reflection
Was looking pretty sad

I know I have his aches and pains
And in my head I am still me
Like I said, my dad is shorter
So....who the hell'd I see?

It's time for an adventure
Where and how is up to you
With fantastic tales and creatures
Where everything is new

Just use imagination
Pick a place nobody knows
Add a creature you invented
And let's see where the tale goes...

Griffins, witches, warlocks
Are in books upon your shelves
In castles, caverns, forests
With dragons, orcs, and elves

There are unicorns and magic
Things fantastic, born of old
Leprechauns and fairies
Guarding mystic pots of gold

You can choose your own adventure
Make them all do what you wish
You can have birds with legs of lions
You can have dogs with heads of fish

The choice for each adventure
Is yours and yours alone
You can have a sword that glitters
Or one that is stuck inside a stone

Kings and Queens and Princes
Fighting quests to win one's heart
With three headed bearded lizards
It's up to you just where to start

A wall that moves at random
Stairs that lead up to the stars
Submarines and Narwhales
Time travelling in cars

An adventure full of wonder
With a dog that sees through walls
A cat who sees the future
And a mouse who does duck calls

The key to each adventure
Is in the books, that you will find
Give birth to what is hidden
Deep inside your mind

Add wings to a small pony
And make a creature that now flies
Add snakes in places of fingers
Try that one on for size

Mother goose this isn't
This is fantasy by you
No one has set boundaries
Just do what you can do

A gentle giant lay his head
Down for one last sleep
He looked at me as if to say
You did your best, don't weep
You shared your life and love with me
You saved me, gave me life
Now, it's time for you to love again
With mum, my mum, your wife
I will run and play, we'll meet again
By the rainbow bridge I'll wait
I'll be there, when it's your time
Don't forget me, don't be late
It's time for you to let me go
It's best for all concerned
Keep me close and don't forget
What I taught, and what you learned
Love is unconditional
Love is also free
I will watch for you from here
If you will watch for me
He looked again, and laid his head
No more needles little man
Now close your eyes, and go to sleep
We will see you when we can
Through you we both are better
Stronger than before you came
We will not forget your smile
And on our hearts is burned your name

I know they're out there somewhere
Watching, cringing, when they see those
who don't know just what to pick out
When they go out in their clothes
I cannot list the culprits
And we all know fashion crime
Like, pants that show the *** crack
We see this all the time
It used to be a faux pas
When one made a clothes mistake
But now you see them daily
With every look you take
With all the shows on tv
Showing people how to dress
Why do they go out looking
Like such a rotten, bleeding mess?
Stripes and spots and solids
Wearing braces AND a belt
Wearing parkas in hot weather
You'd think that they would melt
Socks worn with one's sandals
And those pants around the knees
I mean, someone, help these people
someone help them please
We need some clothes policing
Maybe a hot line they could phone
Maybe send the cops a photo
Before they choose to leave their home
There are people wearing spandex
People who aren't really thin
think of squeezing ten pounds of sausage
In a five pound sausage skin
And makeup...yes, the makeup
Someone needs to teach them how
to apply it, in moderation
We need some clothes policing now!
There are rules and there are guidelines
But common sense should reign supreme
It looks like these poor people
got dressed while in a dream
We need fashion policing
So we can all walk, showing class
Instead of being like these morons
Who wear big jeans, and show their ***!!!

Father Christmas, Pere Noel
People know him just as well
Santa Claus, St. Nicholas too
I know him by all of these...do you?

No matter where you come from
No matter where you go
No matter what folks call him
He's a figure we all know

Dressed in red, or white or blue
Beard of white, big old sack
We know him by so many things
And if you're good he will come back

Whether filling stockings up
Or filling up your wooden shoes
Santa comes on Christmas Eve
And takes away your Christmas blues

Father Christmas, Pere Noel
People know him just as well
Santa Claus, St. Nicholas too
I know him by all of these...do you?

Noel Baba, or Kris Kringle
He can make those sleigh bells jingle
San Niklaw or Babbo Natale
The rat pack all loved him pally!

Do you know him as a skinny man ?
Or is he round and jolly ?
It doesn't matter much to me
It's all mistletoe and holly

Father Christmas, Pere Noel
People know him just as well
Santa Claus, St. Nicholas too
I know him by all of these...do you?

He helps make Christmas what it is
Although the season isn't his
Don't forget the holy side
Just let your heart act as your guide

Pay it forward, pay it back
Remember Santa and his sack
Do unto others as you'd have done
And pay respects to God's son

Father Christmas, Pere Noel
People know him just as well
Santa Claus, St. Nicholas too
I know him by all of these...do you?

We've all seen old Santa Claus
On his sleigh of colours bright
He flies around the world in it
And he does it in one night
But, have you truly seen it
I mean, the colours on the sides
Have you ever really noticed
Santa's fancy ride

I've seen it in the shopping mall
Down here it's shining red
But, that's a store designers choice
It's a colour from their head
I've seen the sleigh in different hues
I've seen it all in green
It's never really all the same
Do you now see what I mean?

Certain countries of the world
Do not allow some hues
Some are just for royalty
And some are just bad news
A black sleigh, never seen the like
Santa wouldn't ride in that
It would just look like eight reindeer
Being chased by a big bat

Blues, and yellow, red and white
There's choices to be made
Depending upon where he is
It takes on a different shade
I prefer the red one
It's my favorite, I must say
But when you look at all the colours
There is fifty shades of ...sleigh!!!

I remember when I saw you
for the first time years ago
You brushed me off without a glance
I thought "that's someone I should know"

Time went by and walls came down
I softened your demeanor
It took some work, but I won out
Because, hell...you couldn't get much meaner

A first is always tougher
No matter what it is you do
But, each first is well worth living
If I can have my first with you

A few months in another first
You met my folks and friends
when I brought you to that birthday do
The one I wished would never end

You took your time and wore me down
Another first came soon
I remember how your body shone
All sweaty 'neath the moon

A first is always tougher
No matter what it is you do
But, each first is well worth living
If I can have my first with you

We married six months after that
In a year our first was born
I can't remember which one cried the most
You, or our baby, just new born

Our first house came, we bought a dog
Things were off and at full speed
But with all of our achievements
You were the one thing I'd still need

A first is always tougher
No matter what it is you do
But, each first is well worth living
If I can have my first with you

We opened up our business
The first of many more to come
It wasn't that successful
but it was still our number one

I remember that day's phone call
The doctor said "I've bad news for you"
He told me of the tumour
I'd passed first and was stage two

Through radiation and my chemo
You were the one who was always there
I remember when you came in
And you had shaved off all your hair

A first is always tougher
No matter what it is you do
But, each first is well worth living
If I can have my first with you

I've been gone now for a while
I know it's tough, but I'm around
I can see you and our child
Even though I'm in the ground

There'll be more firsts now together
I know it just won't be the same
But, still it's firsts and your'e together
Like when we first played out this game

A first is always tougher
Even though it's not with me
But, each first is well worth living
Just make it the best that it can be

I cancelled my bank overdraft
Cut my cards up in a small pile
Actually, it was quite large you know
And this act made me smile

Just deal with cash from here on out
Never buy more than I need
It released a weight off of my shoulders
And deep down I felt freed

fiscally conservative
financially responsible
My nation cannot do it
Without me as an example
No more fees for paying late
If I need it I pay cash
Budgets I will follow
And spending...that I'll slash

Can you imagine if a nation
Took this simple thought to mind
Just pay with what we make from tax
And leave what we can't afford behind

No missiles, and no foreign debt
We're just beholding to ourselves
It's politically reprehensible
But, we owe it to ourselves

fiscally conservative
financially responsible
My nation cannot do it
Without me as an example
No more fees for paying late
If I need it I pay cash
Budgets I will follow
And spending...that I'll slash

No government agendas
To trade for that we can't afford
It would ***** the nations bankers
And make the economists quite bored

To be responsible for our actions
We are taught right from the start
don't spend the money you don't have
Well, to me...that's really smart

fiscally conservative
financially responsible
My nation cannot do it
Without me as an example
No more fees for paying late
Spending I will slash
My budget I will follow
And from now on pay just cash

I went fishing with two witches
Out in my new boat
There was me, the witches
Two black cats, and a little pygmy goat

We sat out on the water
The small odd group and me
And in the first few hours
Not one fish did we see

The witches looked on skyward
Grabbed hands to cast a spell
They said that this worked wonders
And then they both did yell

Icarus, thickarus, giraffes and wild dogs
Lizards, and giant gnu
Bippity, Boppity, snakes and we wish
An airborne callipoe stew

Suddenly the water around the boat
Started to steam, and then it did boil
The sun disappeared, the sky went all black
And the clouds went the colour of oil

The witches both gathered the nets on the boat
As the fish came on up from the deep
They were out of the water and up in the air
And through this the goat went to sleep

Icarus, thickarus, giraffes and wild dogs
Lizards, and giant gnu
Bippity, Boppity, snakes and we wish
An airborne callipoe stew

Fish were around us, high in the air
The witches waved nets as if mad
The cats didn't move nor did the goat
It was the best catch that I'd ever had

After a while the sky turned to blue
The witches sat back with a look
We'd netted hundred of fish from the lake
Now, they would have to be cooked

Icarus, thickarus, giraffes and wild dogs
Lizards, and giant gnu
Bippity, Boppity, snakes and we wish
An airborne callipoe stew

I took the boat in, and docked on the shore
With our fish all strung up just for show
Everyone there asked what bait did we use?
I just smiled, for they weren't set to know

I go fishing with witches at least once a week
My freezer is full and then some
Their spell is amazing, it works every time
They say it loud, and fish come

Icarus, thickarus, giraffes and wild dogs
Lizards, and giant gnu
Bippity, Boppity, snakes and we wish
An airborne callipoe stew

Last night I heard a Nightingale
My wife, she heard it too
I yelled out the bedroom window
Florence. Is that you?

I'm a rocker who likes country
But lately what I find
is that whatever I am hearing
turns to foggy mountain breakdown
in my mind

I listen to Nirvana
And I love to hear it fuzz
But right now Dave Grohl's music
has got foggy mountain breakdown
kind of buzz

Someone saved my life tonight
Elton, don't you know
That right now when I hear it
it's got a foggy mountain breakdown
old banjo

Rock and Roll forever
That's always been my line
But now it doesn't matter
there's a foggy mountain breakdown
it sure don't sound like Motown
there's a foggy mountain breakdown
in my mind

Follow me
to new worlds
to places never seen

Follow me
who knows where we
will say that we have been

Follow me
And meet the folks
Who live deep in my brain

Follow me
and take a ride
On an old time Christmas Train

Follow me
and see the street
have a laugh along the way

Follow me
Enjoy the ride
Where shall we go today?

Follow me
Investigate
Places I create

Follow me
please be on time
You don't want to be late

Follow me
I'll do my best
To be a nice and polite host

Follow me
And who knows
You'll meet "My Holy Ghost"

Follow me
deep in my mind
But be careful where you tread

Follow me
And have some fun
With the worlds inside my head

I was twenty two when the war ended
I was in hospital in Burma
Served in the 82nd West Africa Division
Lost a leg, silly thing losing a leg
My own fault, war took it, but silly ******
It was my fault
We were in India at the time
Not much going on
Waiting for orders, ready to move on
A few of the lads decided to
well, you know...do what lads do
And we got a footy game going
Just a few of us
Major was on board, officers on one side
And Noncoms on the other
Rather civil game if I must say so
The heat was dreadful
Sweat was pouring off of us
And the mozzies were eating us alive
We'd cleared a field in the jungle
Imagine, clearing a pitch in the middle of India
Just to play football with the lads
Well, we did it
I went off after the first half
Walked out past the end line
tripped and heard a click
Nothing much, just a click
I thought, ******...ready to move on
No enemy around, and I'm going to die
In a jungle in India, playing footy
I didn't move, didn't breathe either
But, ten seconds on, it blew
And I went with it
woke up in Burma, field hospital
Leg was gone, ******* and my eye was covered
But, I was alive
All I wanted was a tea
And to know who won
silly ******, no leg and I want to know who won
Never did find out
It seems I stopped the game
silly ******
Well, here I am now sixty eight years on
Can't play footy anymore
Live in a veterans unit in Warwick
Oh, sorry, where are my manners?
I'm Arthur Johnston, lance corporal
No medal like those American chaps
No leg, but, no medal
Victoria Cross and St. Georges
not for this lad
Just doing my duty
Playing football in an Indian jungle
Wish I knew who won though
Getting dressed to go down stairs
Ceremonies start in half hour
I'm the last one left from my lads
Tuttle passed last spring, leaving me
Oldest one it here it seems
Except for that woman in housekeeping
She was a warden with CD
Got everyone in the tubes
During the blitz
Tough old crow she is
Took a brick in the head they say
Made the paper for that one
I lost a leg playing footy
Got a free trip to Burma
Can't get around too well anymore
They've got a special chair for me
Just for the ceremony
I have to lay a wreath
Funny thing, I looked at it
Plastic thing, poppies and ivy
Made in India
What are the chances?
I lay the wreath, salute the flag
and they put me away for another year
Well, better me than that old cow in housekeeping
At least that's what I say
Next year it could be me gone
Never can tell, eh?
Picked that up from a Canadian chap
Ridley Wilson, from British Columbia
I think it was British Columbia
Oh, here they are
time to go down and do my duty
Just like I have for the last 68 years
And the two before
Imagine, 70 years in service to the crown
That's longer than the Queen
Bless her cotton socks
Well, one thing I do know
It was worth it
Every last second of it
Up the empire I say
Even though we don't have one
A Commonwealth now,
Come to think of it
India's not ours anymore
and I think Burma's gone
funny thought,
I lost a leg playing footy
In a country we don't have
ending up in a place that doesn't exist
Just my luck....
Eyes's front, Salute
Oh am I going to feel that tomorrow
God save The Queen

I have extricated foot from mouth on various occasions
Letting fly with all my thoughts on folk and their persuasions
Brain and mouth aren't both in gear when I speak before I think
It sometimes comes out sounding like I've just had a good stiff drink

I sometimes speak without a thought of those who I may hurt
I've been told to reel it in because I can be curt
I promise I will do my best, but, only time will see
I'll make sure that the one I roast...is not in back of me!

Here we lie beneath the poppies
Blowing in the Flanders air
Do not forget our sacrifice
Do not forget that we were there

Young men forged in heat of battle
Neighbors, brothers, sons
Lost in time, with just our markers
Lost to lie, beneath the sun

Remember us as men of valor
Remember what we came to do
We came, and died, do not forget us
We gave our lives up, just for you

Forget us not, beneath the poppies
Where the sky is no longer dark
Remember us as long dead heroes
We came, we fought, we left our mark

Forget us not, please pass the torch on
Forget us not, more than this day
Forget us not, we were all soldiers
And we remain so....all the way!!!

Forget us not....

The money I'm saving on Christmas this year
will be incredibly useful for buying more beer
I'm not buying presents for family and friends
But this festive season I will be making amends

I'll never shop early for presents to give
I swear on my mother, for as long as I live
For while looking for boxes and our Christmas tree
I found boxes of presents from seventy three

All wrapped up and labelled in a box all alone
Hidden by an old blanket that was haphazardly thrown
Beside it, more presents from around eighty four
And as I kept on searching I found many more

There were presents for Grandad, who is now pushing daisies
And a few for Aunt Marg, who we all know was crazy
Gifts for the children, who now have kids of their own
In fact almost all are for children who've grown

I found a few that were given from Santa himself
And a few for my husband on an old wooden shelf
All wrapped up and labelled and dusty as well
I'd febreeze them downstairs to get rid of the smell

I promise from now, I will write down what I hide
And I'll draw a small map to use as a guide
I can't wait now for Christmas to see what we've got
From all the Christmases past, and the gifts I forgot!

I've found some folks on facebook
I think i'd really like
and then there are those certain ones
I tell....go on....get on yer bike

I've met many folks while writing
And most of them are nice
The others just are spiteful folks
To whom being nasty is a vice

I've travelled round the world with friends
Most I've never met
But, I'm never saying never
My life's not over yet

There are some I met through Titan
Our dog, and our best friend
There are others who just found us
And I will stick with till the end

Then, there are the ones who hate
They hide there in the dark
Tearing little pieces off of you
And they do it for a lark

They hide in anonymity
Criticising all you do
I've run across a few of them
I blocked them all...did you?

But as they say a bad penny
Will always be around
And no matter where you go on here
That bad penny can be found

I'm staying on because I won't
quit and let them beat me
In fact I'm sticking 'round to say
You ******* all can eat me

This is a public forum
And I think that most are good
But, for the rest of you...get off the cross
We need the ****** wood!