You keep me grounded like a tree
Your roots, they nourish and bind me
To this plot of earth on which I stand
You're worth more than every grain of sand

How can somebody who doesn't know me
Define me?

She sits in the stands
Up in the nosebleed section
Cheering wildly, admiring her boys
In red and white
While he is under her hood
With soot-covered hands
Making sense of and fixing
Her mechanical mess.

Later on, she makes his favorite meal
To show him how much she loves him
But he shows up with takeout
And complains about how long it took
Just to replace the starter
In her red Corolla.

There's a difference between
Admiration
And love.

If you want to go fast, go alone.
If you want to go far, go together.

-African Proverb*

I can't visualize what life would be like
Without you.
I will never awaken to such an aimless love
Without you.
I will never show the buttercup's glow
Without you.

I cannot love
Without you,
But I will never love you.

Before she goes to sleep at night
She puts a noose around her neck
To give herself a reason to stop
Tossing and turning and thinking
About the last time she
Was safe in her own skin.

Instead of tucking herself in
Under blanket and quilt
She tucks a knife into her chest
To remind herself of her guilt
And her shame and the pain
She faces at the dawn
Of each new day.

She threw her pillow in the trash
Because comfort wasn't something
She thought belonged in her life.
Now she rests her head
On a loaded Sig .40
And finds solace in the touch
Of cold steel against her cheek.

She always said she couldn't sleep
And now *she can't stop.

I'm reaching for stars
With my head in the sand
And I'm swimming in currents
While I'm standing on land
If you're hearing this now
And you think I'm confused
Then it's pretty apparent
You've never been used

Tracing lines on the pavement
Of this bustling town
And he only sound that I hear
Is my soul screaming out
Now I'm stuck here in a place
Where no one else cares
So I'm launching my rocket
And blowing up in mid-air

You say you're a dreamer
At least that's what I heard
From the haze in your eyes
That's as good as your word
Please wake up, my dear
Don't be playing with knives
If you call yourself a dreamer
You'll be sleeping all your life

Tear the flesh from my bones
Til my soul is alone
And my body's a lake
Fed from red-running holes.

You are stagnant and cold
Like the moss on a stone
And a cesspool for sinners
Who you let come and go.

I'm convinced my generation is nothing but a bunch of sheep...where are our future leaders? I don't want to keep living in a world where we are expected to go with the flow, to never stand out, and to adopt the same opinions as the masses or else be labeled a racist, a bigot, deplorable, or any other name in the book.

Another disheartening fact: my future children are going to be taught and influenced by educators who think safe spaces are good ideas, who think social justice warriors, celebrities, and clueless athletes fit the mold of a hero more than the disabled vets at the VA, and who find ridiculing people for their race, gender, ****** orientation, etc appalling, but having a religion and/or different political beliefs than them are grounds to be mocked...

God forbid someone says they don't buy into big pharma and their vaccines..."anti-vaxxers are the **** of the earth! All children need to be vaccinated!" But speak out against abortion, which kills more children than any disease we have vaccines for or not..."you're anti-women! How dare you tell a woman what she can do with her body! How archaic of you!"...save the children or **** them? Which one is it? Will the hypocrisy from my generation ever end?

I just threw out basic examples, but if you look at social media for 5 minutes and possess a brain I'm sure you'll see other instances of people with differing opinions being belittled by a group my peers. Another portion of them will blindly follow and agree without a leg to stand on. And an even smaller portion will actually stand up against the hate speech they themselves claim to despise.

Agree or disagree, this rant has been brought to you by a man who thinks for himself and doesn't really give a rat's *** if you agree or not.

We will never forget...

The last day dawns on my life
And I don't know it
As I wake up to golden rays
Of sun knocking on my eyelids.

I kissed my wife good morning,
Got up out of bed
And tucked her in again.
Naomi spent 10 hours last night
Delivering a new mother's firstborn.
I didn't tell her good morning
And I wish I told her I loved her
But I didn't want to wake her.

I sipped my coffee on the way to work
As if it were any other day,
My only worry was if I had spilled any
On the new pink and white
Polka-dot tie my daughter Elise
Had bought me for my birthday
Last weekend
Or the new Bostonian shoes
My wife gave me
With the card that read,
We love you from top to bottom!

I walked into the conference room
And checked my watch:
8:36.
I was 9 minutes early
To the most exciting moment
Of my career:
My first pitch as project manager
For the new country club going up
East of the city in Glenwood Landing.

I was 10 minutes early
To the most helpless moment
Of my life.

At 8:45 I said good morning
To many fine ladies and gentlemen...
Bankers, lawyers, city representatives,
A union boss, some secretaries,
And a stenographer in the back.

The same words I would never again say to my wife and child...

And immediately I was thrown
Through the air
And knocked against the righthand wall
Of the room.
I was utterly confused
And my face burned
From the coffee I had been holding
That now stained
My beautiful polka-dot tie.

It would be nothing compared to the heat I would soon face.

Outside our 111th-story window
Rose an obsidian plume of smoke.
We all knew something terrible
Had happened just a few floors below.

The fine ladies and gentlemen
Of a moment ago
Quickly turned into uncivilized beasts
As the lights went out
And the piercing scream of the fire alarm
Shouted louder than the new mother
Experiencing the pain
Of her first childbirth.

Smoke very quickly came from below
And filled the floor with the foulest odor
I had ever smelled:
Burning rubber, sulfur,
And burnt hair.
Others in the room sealed the door shut
With expensive overcoats and undershirts
From Armani and Burberry.

They tried the phone countless times
But the line was dead.
I looked down at my watch
As a bead of sweat fell from my brow
And landed on my new tie:
9:11.

Today's date.

The fire alarm got tired of yelling
And the room was filled with an
Uncomfortable rumbling sound...

Flames...

...and the hysterical wails of the
Fine ladies and gentlemen in the room.
Some prayed, some wept together,
Others wept alone.
The one thing we all had in common
Was the persistent coughing
From the obsidian smoke
Slicing our lungs.

I looked down at my watch:
9:23.
The heat was now almost unbearable.
We huddled around the window
Jack or John or Jim smashed
With the powerful throw
Of a mini-refigerator.

When I gazed out the window
At the same sun that kissed my eyelids
This morning,
I was calm.
I thought of Naomi, who was
Surely watching on television
As her family called her to make sure
Her and I and Elise were alright.

Daddy's alright, baby girl.

I'm alright, Naoms.

9:31...
Gary or Greg was the first to jump.

I'll make it home to you, angels.

9:32...
Sophia or Cynthia was next.

Please, God, get me out of here...

9:33...
Jack or John or Jim
And Patty or Peggy
Were each other's last hug
As they fell
Like two stars from heaven.

9:35...
I couldn't see
And I couldn't breathe.
The sunlight was the last thing to kiss me.

Before I jumped
I felt my girls.
I touched the tie on my neck
And the shoes on my feet.

I love you both

From top to bottom.

You are the moon that is moored in the sky
And the moonshine that shimmers against Atlantis' cloak
So vivid, yet so pale
And I begin to wonder if you're alright
Up there, all alone atop the world.

Is it better to be carefully propped on a celestial pedestal for all men to indulge,
Or to be chaotically plunged
Into a sea of solitude and peace?

You are much wiser and older, my dear;
Is it true that
Beauty lies
In the eye
Of the beholder?

Like the seasons, people change...sometimes for the better, sometimes for worse. Whatever the case, don't say "people never change." Change is the only constant in life, my son.

It's time to drop the score and move on, not settle it. Don't **** yourself under the weight of a grudge, time does that on its own.

Loyalty is the fastest eroding trait of your generation. Don't stop being someone's high ground when the tide sweeps in. Be dependable, my son; more people look up to you than you know.

I long to call you lover
But I fail to call you friend.
Who'd have thought
That after all we've fought
We'd wind up at this bitter end?

Yet still you stay so close to me
Even though we're oceans apart.
But after what you've done
To prove I'm not the one
Our bitter end will be my start.

If you weren't real, I'd make you up.
I'd spill my heart like rivers run.
I'd throw away your yesterdays
And write your name in outer space
With stars.

"...Walking out of that place
With you, my friend, by my side,
I felt like a soldier after war:
I was void of my senses.
I lacked all feeling of physical pleasure
And pain.
I forgot what it meant to possess
Simplicity, joy, and contentment,
Like a billionaire who indulges his every whim
Then overdoses on ******* or ******
Or one too many bullets to the head..."

Our eyes deceive us
Why don't they believe us?

Play pretend for a night
The sheets were ocean breeze

God, she was beautiful
I took a bullet to the head

If I could I would draw her
So I wasn't runner-up

But we were just temporary
My penciled-in girl

On an autumn walk at the ides of day
I saw birds of a feather fly together away.
As they flew over flames
In an ides-of-day way
They got caught in the weather
And so forever became
The tall twisted tale
That we hear of so much:
Two birds with one hailstone,
Death from maelstrom above.

I gave you your eyes,
Showed you the blue in the sky,
Why in the hell did I bother to try?
You make her laugh when she wants to cry,
You never let go when you say your goodbyes,
When you ****, your body's her lullaby.
And when you both wake up, it's not luck that binds you together:
It's the lies that you told me
And the ties here that hold me
And your false promises that sting me so coldly.

"You are beautiful.
You are gentle.
You are brilliant.
You are strong.
You have the most caring heart I've ever seen.
I've known you for well over a year.
We've had our ups and downs.
We always come out on top.
We've both been hurt.
We're better because of each other.
Nothing makes me happier than
Seeing a smile on your face.
Nothing hurts me more than
Seeing you cry.
Nobody is perfect
But you are flawless.
I want to fight for you
Because I believe in you.
I admire you,
I'm proud of you,
And I want you to know
I love you."

Cutting and slashing
Is love everlasting
Never breaking the skin
It mutilates from within

Here I am far away from home
With a hole in my head and two in my chest.
No thoughts in my mind, I'm void and alone,
And the clock that made my body tick on has finally come to rest.
An entire lifetime of pleasures and pains runs red on the sidewalk near what used to be a somebody to nobody.

The first time I saw your radiant glow
It came from those globes you call eyes.
They took me around the world, to places
Neither discovered nor explored.
Through hell and back,
I slashed and hacked my way
Through vine and brush
To see your light
Because it was more beautiful
Than the glistening river that ran
Through the valley below me
And the sparkling snow
That fluttered and blowed
At the summit above.
Your light was warmer than the breeze
After I dipped my body in the
Crystal clear tides of the sea
And it was more brilliant
Than the silhouette of galaxies
I saw in the sky before I slept.
When I finally closed my eyes
I couldn't see any darkness
Because I dreamt of you.

It's funny how you're my sun,
Warming my soul on the coldest of days
When the piercing stilettos of winter
Penetrate my body.
Yet on other days you burn my skin
Like a million untamed sparks
Lunging at the hand of the man
Who feeds the flames
Because he doesn't want to see them die.

When I wither in times of drought
And my roots become weak,
When my petals wander and blow
From even the slightest breeze
Water me.

When I shiver in times of winter
And my bones become fragile,
When my skin goes numb and I break
From even the gentlest touch
Warm me.

When I can't walk in times of travel
And my feet become ash,
When my human frame crumbles away
From even the minutest weight
Deliver me.

When I breathe in times of pain
And my chest becomes still,
When my burden is heavy and dark
From a life lived in shadows
Illuminate me.

Everytime I see your bubbly smile I'm actually watching fireworks.
The air smells explosive when you let that first one go and I feel the shockwave hit my chest.
You light up the night, not once, not twice, but for what seems like forever, so radiant and clamoring its impossible to ignore you.
You captivate me with quickly blooming blossoms whenever you snicker and I want nothing more than to sit where I am and stare at you for hours.
You never get tired of releasing your light into the world, and you never get old; you only get more beautiful to me from beginning to the end.

*Save the finale just for me.

You're the sand in my pail
When I'm making a castle.
You're the wind in my sail
When I need to go faster.
You're the salt in the air,
You're the waves on the sea
You're surrounding my chest
Like the sand on my feet.

Why is life so amazing
When we build each other up,
When we push against boundaries
And never give up?
As we sit and laugh forever
On the dunes by the shore,
I see the life in your eyes that
You've never lived before.

White sand stuck to your lips
Hair in braids, hands on hips
Is this a hit or a miss?
Is this ignorant bliss?
Is it selfish to say
That I want you to stay,
Like the embers of sunset
Dancing out on the bay?

You're the sand and the wind,
The gulls circling in
Search my heart for the things
That are written in sin.
You're the salt and the waves,
You're the reason I pray.
You're the woman I breathe for
And I wanted to ask you to
Stay.

When I'm tired
I can never seem to sleep.
Crashing waves in my head,
Or crashing cars...?
Are my thoughts what I want
To wade knee-deep into
After a long day?
Or are they deadly self-portraits
Of my day made of
Brain matter and blood
And whatever else comes from
A body after instant death?
Sunny days are what hide the stars,
Not crashing waves and crashing cars.

Save me a place at the table
My little white flower
That sways in the breeze.

Please hold my seat if you're able
I'll love you forever
After all the wine from bottle flees.

Set me a plate and I'll stay full
My hunger endeavors
Your warmth was always mine to be.

Pacify my war-torn soul
With your white-flag lips
And breath of sun.
My body needs peace
And it wants to surrender
To a gentler place
Where touches are tender.

Pacify my warring spirit
With your knock-out fists
And soldier's gun.
My body aches to ache
And pain in my sender
To a beautiful place
Where malice is mender.

As I lie in autumn dreams
I see the moonlight shine in beams
And caress the rose red fall-time leaves
That flail and flutter beneath the trees

While autumn blooms are not unseen
They distract the crowds with grace serene
A performance of pirouetting figurines
Whose voices are drowned by our machines

As humans we stumble and struggle through life
We carry our shame and we comfort our strife
While the trees are all children whose leaves are small kites
That get tossed up and blown round by faith and not sight

I know the world is autumn's fight
As starshine fades and day breaks night
Is it happenstance or is it right
That branches shed what gives them life?