All these years
(and all those covered up, fears)
Ah, babe.. the things I would do
to keep myself separate..
to keep from being pulled in--
to all things, nonlife;
from that which my spirit
could not believe in..
to paths that felt to be
diametrically opposed
to a true north
that I did not know,
but could only feel
Oh what have I done,
my beautiful--
I have judged, and lost
so much
in order to become so un-able
to hold on to so little
Just how much of me
would be left,
had I let you in;
..everything?
Or no-thing--
sans the memory
of all that I have done
in order to obtain it.
I'll face myself
to cross out what I've become
erase myself,
and let go of what I've done
~ C Bennington
https://youtu.be/WDDNCc2rkYI
all the years, and years
and years of it
