"fckn" poems
my heart is broken but open
fragile but closin.
my heart tht you chosen
will you embed it?
my stomach is turnin
it is fckn hurtin.
ig im overdosin...
so many emotions
how could you cheat.
the hole in my heart
my heart is explodin
ig were now opponents
blood is now overflowin...
and now tht i think.
why did i open?
now im completely broken...
but open.
Aug 4, 2018
Aug 4, 2018 at 9:17 AM UTC
Gettin’ sh!t on like I’m The Villian,
got this queasy feeling on the line reeling,
coming undone at the same time wound up and spun,
I’m done playing but stuck at the table with The Dealer still dealing,
want to throw myself up out of myself,
can escape every position except the one I’m in,
can’t escape yourself if knowledge is wealth,
then I’m loaded & still spending my winnings,
got Karma Credit but I’m morally cash poor,
because I just fckt my girlfriend as if she was a *****
and I feel terrible or rather horrible about it,
because i think I’m infected by what neglect did without a cure,
no one is pure,
at least I’m not that’s for sure,
I'm tainted with devils in my head painted with what I spilled I’m red,
sick with the sort of illness that can't easily be cured,
in fact got a bad case of the blues,
but instead of strumming a guitar I’m taking things too far,
cut her so bad with my fingernails,
that I fear it might leave a few scars,
tied her up so tight,
that her wrists turned purple,
see she’s attracted to bad boys,
and I warned her that that’s the type of attraction that can hurt you,
little girl shouldn’t be out past her curfew,
nothing good ever happens past midnight,
but we’re both running from something,
both stand outs in the in crowd still something doesn’t sit right,
I’m uncomfortable,
because I think maybe all humans are disgusting,
maybe we just cause each other pain and trash the earth’s surface,
maybe we deserve to feel guilty & that’s why we are all fcking distrusting,
maybe I’m gonna fckn **** myself,
but this is a card game so then again maybe I’m bluffing,
maybe everything’s going to be alright,
maybe I’m being uptight for nothing,
but I’ll tell you what I feel like the **** of my own joke,
but I don’t give a fck so instead of changing I’m just shrugging,
mean mugging every person I pass suspicious of every bloke,
because these days crime pays and everyone’s always up to something,
and I just want to get ghost,
but I can’t and I guess that’s the way it goes,
so I’m sittin’ in the uncomfortable position,
of being both a role model as well as a criminal,
Gettin’ sh!t on like I’m The Villian,
got this queasy feeling on the line reeling,
coming undone at the same time wound up and spun,
I’m done playing but stuck at the table with The Dealer still dealing…
∆ LaLux ∆
Sep 17, 2018
Sep 17, 2018 at 7:18 AM UTC
All these things,
mean nothing to me,
stop giving me gifts,
you can’t buy me with things,
I’m on a flight with no baggage,
only carry on so carry on,
just checking in I just checked in on a flight,
gone into the light of the night so if you’re checking for me I’m already gone,
on a flight with no baggage,
can’t get used to taking this abuse,
I mean I know we’re all monsters,
but that’s no excuse,
and I know we usually destroy our own lives,
so why even try to improve I mean really what’s the use?
Destroying our own cities,
look what horrors we’ve become,
toying with our own citizens,
becoming old and alone instead of together and young,
living long enough to see ourselves become the villains,
growing ugly and old instead of dying beautiful and young,
oh Lord what have we done?
And I just want to escape,
please I want to leave and go anywhere but here,
see you don’t own me I’m not your doll,
so don’t call me baby or sweetie or honey or dear,
I am not any one of your things to be given,
I am not responsible for your oppressed childhood tears,
I am bigger than that,
I am bigger than you,
I am the Cheshire Cat,
I am the moon,
I am bigger than big,
I am a monster to monsters,
so no do not try and control me,
because I conquer those that try and conquer,
a monster,
with metallic scales and electric hair,
I grip your tiny Hell of a shell and crush your rig caged fury,
I step forward the earth quakes and my black eyes rage,
little man please,
hitting me doesn’t make you’re weak self stronger,
and I know I put up with your passive aggressive attacks before,
but I’ve turned into a monster and won’t put up with it any longer,
you’ve turned me into a monster,
so I’m standing up,
to all the times I’ve been knocked down,
I’m getting you out of my life,
and I’m getting me out of this town,
out of this place,
away from these things,
and I swear to God I’ll cut off my fckn finger,
if that’s what it takes to lose this ring,
all these things,
mean nothing to me,
stop giving me gifts,
you can’t buy me with things,
I’m on a flight with no baggage,
only carry on so carry on,
just checking in I just checked in on a flight,
gone into the light of the night so if you’re checking for me I’m already gone…
∆ Aaron LA Lux ∆
Nov 7, 2017
Nov 7, 2017 at 10:18 PM UTC
Warm up the bbq
I don’t want no war with you
You said achoo
I said bless you
See you in a few
Follow where the wind blew
Mourning the loss
Of your mind sanity source
No more are you a fckn boss
Hoss
Why the force
You want to be liked
Yet every word you say is miked
Who you broadcasting to
What they do?
You feel the breeze
When you squeeze your knees
To fast
You want your head rub
So you could get some ***
Hoss
Warm up the bbq
I don’t want no war with you
Let’s sit and talk this
Through tongues of ***
Tequila to make belly bun
Put more pepper on that son
What’s wrong with you
You said achoo
I said bless you
See you in a few
Follow where the wind blew
Don’t sneeze on me dude
Leh we talk this through
Oct 20, 2014
Oct 20, 2014 at 9:39 PM UTC
“It’s 2017 those pants they just won’t do.”,
it’s 2017 undressed by a 16 year old,
hold on though it’s not ******
even though yes she is truly beautiful,
we are in the dressing room of a mansion,
attending a costume party that's themeless,
and everyone here is dressed up,
dressing and ********** no salads just ballads and suits that are seamless,
and here I am in this Dream with,
this girl I don't even know and she's 16 with,
an attitude to match rude but just a bit,
and sure she's cute but there's no way I'd hit,
I am not attracted,
to Ms. Red Red,
in Love but not in Lust there’s a difference,
she's a friend's sister and that’s it,
Ms. Red Red,
ridged rounded scaled scarf,
I know that sounds hard to explain,
and I’m not attempting to try,
I’m just saying judging is a waste of time in the Wild.
Listen,
this life is so surreal,
that even when it’s viewed with vivid realizations,
it still doesn’t always even feel like it’s real at all,
all of this,
is,
as insane,
as we are,
are we,
anything other than Out of Control,
O.C. Baby I’m ready let’s roll already,
oh well who knows not me no one tells not even those For Whom the Bell Tolls,
are we,
anything other than Out of Control,
anything other than everything that’s so fckn Cliche,
can’t escape it not even if I tape it up and cast it away.
Fck you,
fck me,
fck this fckn Sociopathic Society,
so long I’m gone gonna join a Progressive Alternative Community.
Are you feelin’ me,
forget the cliches,
let go of every label you were ever given,
especially the labels you’ve given yourself,
well,
here we are again,
at the point in the poem,
where you ask what the point is of this poem,
well
there is none,
the Secret is there’s no Secret,
come on don’t be so passe and blasé,
cliche,
yeah I know,
you told me that already,
but there’s no going back to the Past we’re headed where we’re headed here we go.
2017,
welcome to the Future of Dreams,
and that sounds cool,
but I don’t even know what it means,
see,
sometimes things make sense,
even though,
they’re things we can’t comprehend,
oh well then,
I guess we’re in,
a whirlwind of real life pretend,
living in this Factory of Dreams Happily Ever After,
living H.E.A.,
true Deja Vu with No Rules,
then she shakes me from my daze as she says to me,
“Hey it’s 2017 those pants they just won’t do.”…
∆ Aaron LA Lux ∆
12/1/17
Mar 9, 2017
Mar 9, 2017 at 12:52 AM UTC
Close Enough To Sunday
It’s all fckt up,
can’t even pretend that it’s not,
I get invited out to these events,
where everyone’s dressed up,
but I’m not,
I’m there in jeans and a t-shirt,
thanking those that are thanking me for writing these prophecies,
but really I’m not sure what all this work was or is really worth…
written about ten books,
multiple international best sellers,
#1 Poetry Book in The World,
3 times in a row for worse or for better,
but really,
what am I saying,
and really,
what are you saying,
it’s all fckt up,
and we all know it,
still we pretend it’s all good till the end,
we had a Chance we just needed to not blow it,
but we did,
we neglected the earth,
even though we all knew and know,
that that Moment of Truth will hurt,
I can’t even have a drink at a club,
without feeling guilty for the pollution we’ve caused,
even when those drinks are free and served with a smile,
because I know that smile is covering some recently retreated sores,
we’ve neglected the poor,
and caused significant scars,
on the skin of the earth,
now Musk wants to colonize Mars,
and that’s not a shot at Elon,
I trust him and his vision,
he’s a genius creation,
a creative genius that generally makes good decisions,
I’m just saying,
given the current position,
whether Elon Musk or a homeless pigeon,
we’re all fckt and that’s the fckn situation,
it’s all fckt up,
can’t even pretend that it’s not,
I get invited out to these events,
where everyone’s dressed up,
but I’m not,
I’m there in jeans and a t-shirt,
thanking those that are thanking me for writing these prophecies,
but really I’m not sure what all this work was or is really worth…
still I put in work,
verse after verse,
cliche and cliche,
the Gift & The Curse,
like somehow,
I’ll be able to write all our wrongs,
answer all the questions,
and celebrate with sounds,
make Love and make Mysteries,
with a Stranger in a Strange Town,
and I’ve been up till way too Late:30 lately,
too tired to debate or hesitate when it’s time to get down,
down,
here,
the sky looks so beautiful,
the clouds,
from the ground,
are everything I choose to show,
so,
whatever,
what more can we say,
let’s go,
wherever,
‘cause when we've got it all the only thing we want to get is away,
want for nothing else,
it’s Close Enough to Sunday,
let’s take some time to take some time,
no need to go right now ‘cause we all go one way or another one day,
soon,
so,
so what,
so,
we’re fckt,
it’s all fckt up,
can’t even pretend that it’s not,
I get invited out to these events,
where everyone’s dressed up,
but I’m not,
I’m there in jeans and a t-shirt,
thanking those that are thanking me for writing these prophecies,
but really I’m not sure what all this work was or is really worth…
∆ Aaron La Lux ∆
Mar 4, 2017
Mar 4, 2017 at 11:11 PM UTC
I write like I can write away this insanity,
but it’s this insanity that drives me to write verses constantly,
caught in a rhyme scheme these words are the web,
but who’s the spider and who’s the fly,
who’s the victim who’s the villain,
let’s take a vote those that think both say “I”,
I,
write like I can write away this insanity,
what’s this loop called Hollywood,
I’m not here to play games or drop names,
won’t even drop my own and that’s word,
word,
words,
so many fckn words,
I write them all out of me,
but what do you do,
when everything is not enough?
I wrote this for you,
your’s truly,
Aaron La Lux….
volume 1 of the Hollywood HeartBeat Trilogy
available worldwide 7/7/16
∆ Aaron La Lux ∆
Jun 16, 2016
Jun 16, 2016 at 10:13 PM UTC
**I’m freakin out,
I think I might have a disease,
and I want to tell you what it is,
but I won’t because it’s embarrassing,
not ready yet to release the Skeletons from my Closet,
plus there’s a lot of Skeletons in my closet because it’s a walk-in,
it’s funny how I used to get played back in the day but now even the jocks are on my **** jockin’,
on my **** and ****
not trying to be too ******
like making a passively racist joke at a party,
over bites of caviar from a Baluga,
whoo raw!
Hee haw,
I’m freakin out,
I think I might have a disease,
and I want to tell you what it is,
but I won’t because it’s embarrassing,
don’t want to talk about it,
don’t even know why I’m writing about it,
because you probably don’t want to even read about it,
sorry I brought it up let’s change the subject to something not so uncomfortable how about this,
what’s fun to you,
dressed up whips and leather,
crazy style loco real life live freak show,
you call it a cyclone I call it perfect weather,
tether,
your morals,
on a flag pole,
fly a fckn pirate flag,
where are we,
I mean as a society,
it’s 2017,
what the fck are you saying,
tell me something real,
tell me something original,
tell me something I’ve never heard before,
or don’t tell me anything at all,
possessed,
yeah I said it,
how else could I write these unlimited verses,
without a single edit,
this is the perfect version,
of a beneficial **********
so open up your 3rd Eye for a second,
and experience this in 1st person,
step inside the mind of a mad man,
they always ask what it’s like to be Aaron,
well now’s your chance to find out,
so do it now because most times there’s no 2nd chance,
I’m freakin out,
I think I might have a disease,
and I want to tell you what it is,
but I won’t because it’s embarrassing,
not ready yet to release the Skeletons from my Closet,
plus there’s a lot of Skeletons in my closet because it’s a walk-in,
it’s funny how I used to get played back in the day but now even the jocks are on my **** jockin’…
∆ Aaron LA Lux ∆**
Mar 10, 2017
Mar 10, 2017 at 8:13 PM UTC
im sorry...
pour a shot
shoot me in the f***kn head
this **** is explicit
im on my knees at the edge of my bed
just prayin
lord save me
from all the sorrow
all the tears
i spent my whole life living in fear
broken hearted
torn apart
limb by mfn limb
if love is a sin
send my *** to hell
every task i try turns to dust and i fckn fail
i keep asking for signs like my *** aint blind
never ever did i learn to read braille
this is the end of the beginning
im sorry..
to put 100% effort into all that was worth it
the future
love doesn't last unless its lust
if just for a moment
my body is just like a catacomb
tore my heart right out of my chest
and now im in debt
for the rest ..of my mfn life
enough is enough
im signing over my got **** rights
of this life
Jun 8, 2018
Jun 8, 2018 at 9:16 PM UTC
Close Enough To Sunday
It’s all fckt up,
can’t even pretend that it’s not,
I get invited out to all these events,
where everyone’s all dressed up,
but I’m not,
I’m there in jeans and a t-shirt,
thanking those that are thanking me for writing these prophecies,
but really I’m not sure what all this work was or is really worth…
written about 10 books,
multiple international best sellers,
#1 Poetry Book in The World,
4 times in a row for worse or for better but whatever,
I mean really,
what am I even saying,
and really,
what are you even saying?
It’s all fckt up,
and we all know it,
still we pretend it’s all good till the end,
we had a Chance to save us just needed to not blow it,
but we did,
we neglected the earth,
even though we all knew and know,
that that Moment of Truth is coming and it’ll hurt,
can’t even have a drink at a club,
without feeling guilty for the pollution we’ve caused,
even when those drinks are free and served with a smile,
because I know that smile is usually covering some recently retreated sores,
we’ve neglected the poor,
and caused significant scars,
on the skin of Mother Earth,
meanwhile Musk just wants to colonize Mars,
and that’s not a shot at Elon,
I trust him and respect his vision,
he’s a creative visionary genius creation,
a creative genius that generally makes good decisions,
I’m just saying,
given the current position,
whether Elon Musk or a homeless vagrant,
we’re all fckt equally and that’s the fckn situation,
it’s all fckt up,
can’t even pretend that it’s not,
I get invited out to all these events,
where everyone’s all dressed up,
but I’m not,
I’m there in jeans and a t-shirt,
thanking those that are thanking me for writing these prophecies,
but really I’m not sure what all this work was or is really worth…
Still I put in work,
verse after verse,
cliche after cliche,
The Gift & The Curse,
like somehow,
I’ll be able to write all our wrongs,
answer all the questions,
and celebrate with victorious songs,
make Love and make Mysteries,
with a Stranger in a Strange Town,
and I’ve been up till way too Late:30 lately,
too tired to debate or hesitate when it’s high time to get down,
down,
here,
the sky looks so beautiful,
the mushroom clouds,
from the ground,
are everything I choose to show,
so,
whatever,
what more can we say,
let’s go,
wherever,
‘cause we've got it all but the only thing we want to get is away,
want for nothing else,
hey it’s Close Enough to Sunday anyways,
so let’s just take this day to rest,
no need to worry about the one thing that comes to everyone eventually,
let’s take some time to take some time,
no need to go right now ‘cause we all go one way or another anyways,
one day,
soon,
high as,
noon,
so,
so what,
so,
we’re fckt,
it’s all fckt up,
can’t even pretend that it’s not,
I get invited out to all these events,
where everyone’s all dressed up,
but I’m not,
I’m there in jeans and a t-shirt,
thanking those that are thanking me for writing these prophecies,
but really I’m not sure what all this work was or is really worth…
∆ Aaron LA Lux ∆
from '777: Alphas & Numerics'
available worldwide here: https://www.amazon.com/dp/1548700746
Jul 15, 2017
Jul 15, 2017 at 1:54 AM UTC
Heart breaking heart broke,
they say write another poem,
as if my emotions are only fodder,
for the father feeling solemn,
so in,
no lines,
contemplate everything,
including suicide,
If I died,
would I go to Heaven,
if a cat has 9 lives,
then does a a man have 7?
All questions,
with no answers to mention,
if the result is an insult,
then it matters not the intention,
an Honorable Mention,
here at this point in the poem,
to all those that told me to go in,
and write a poem about my heart being broke open,
broken,
open,
poems,
omens,
I guess then you must break open to let the light in,
let the light in,
this is an Amazing Adventure called life,
let’s make some memories before the grave takes our energy,
let’s celebrate our life and not wait for any lights,
life in the fast lane,
lost a few good men along the way,
and a few good women to but hey that’s the way it goes,
when you’re living life in the fast lane,
this is all so fckn cliche,
and I don’t know what else to say,
and she left me because I wasn’t strong enough,
to simply speak up and ask her to stay,
fck,
I kept my mouth shut,
then just watched as she walked away,
and now I’m in that type of pain that one can not simply escape,
I’m sorry I’m not sorry I’m late,
but I don’t have a very important date,
other than that one I have with Destiny,
where we meet at the entrance of those Pearly Gates,
great,
just another Heart Break Love Story,
jeez,
tell me something we haven’t heard already,
tired of hearing the sound of breaking hearts,
when I find myself on the Boulevard,
what has become of this empire,
how have we changed so little yet gone so far,
and what will be left of us when we’re done,
and where do we go when there’s no where left to run,
and what will be left of it when it’s done,
when our Empire breaks like a heart attack from being beat like a drum,
Heart breaking heart broke,
they say write another poem,
as if my emotions are only fodder,
for the father feeling solemn,
so in,
no lines,
contemplate everything,
including suicide,
If I died,
would I go to Heaven,
if a cat has 9 lives,
then does a a man have 7?
All questions,
with no answers to mention,
if the result is an insult,
then it matters not the intention,
an Honorable Mention,
here at this point in the poem,
to all those that told me to go in,
and write a poem about my heart being broke open,
broken,
open,
poems,
omens,
I guess then you must break open to let the light in…
∆ LaLux ∆
Instagram: @aaronlalux
Sep 21, 2018
Sep 21, 2018 at 1:12 PM UTC
A Beautiful Hurt
So you hurt.
So what,
We all do.
But the beauty hurts so good.
And the miseries of our past,
can only define our future if we let them,
these memories we hold onto from the past,
we are not them.
Your Scars,
are watercolors,
your Demons,
make beautiful music,
your Hearts,
beat for all tomorrows,
your Passions,
always conquer all your sorrows.
But let’s,
not be destructive,
for that’s,
not our heart's true function,
once in,
this life,
there’s only one way out, and there’s no need to rush it,

and yes,
we have more than our fair share of problems,
but there’s no need to stress it,
we all have problems and learn from our mistakes,
so when we make a major mistake there's no reason to regret it,
so whatever.
So you hurt.
So what,
we all do.
But the beauty hurts so good.
And that makes our moments of bliss,
that much more beautiful,
shine your Lovelight Joseph,
upon that darkness like you're Lucifer,
you are a fckn ∆rtist even when you're delusional,
and you harness the chaos to harass the mundane,
and show the whole world the beauty you can make from the pain.
You're a monster,
tuned into the frequency all real no gimmicks,
an emotional alchemist turning hurt into heal,
making beats because those we love live forever through our music RIP Mingus.
When you finally find freedom again,
you will find the illusion of Time to just be a diluted delusion of Mind,
find,
freedom,
right here,
within your Self,
no one can make you do anything you don’t wanna do,
even when they tell you their totally skewed world views are true,
most of this is just distractions anyways,
what is the worth of their emotions anyways,
I’ll love you unconditionally anyways,
because true love is expressed in many ways,
no matter what the cause for the confusion is,
contusions with bruises and welts on Self,
beat your ego up and down until you scream in mercy,
until you give up all of you including your Self,
until you stop fighting and you let go, let go,
so you can go!
So,
you hurt.
So what,
we all do.
But the beauty hurts so good.
– ∆ Aaron LA Lux ∆ –
Volume 1
The H Trilogy
City of Angels
I just published a new book.
If you could take a moment to check it out,
and even write a review it'd be most appreciated.
All profits go to a charity that prevents child abuse and ****** assault.
So not only are you getting an epic book of poetry,
but you're also supporting a good cause.
Thank you SO much!
∆
https://www.amazon.com/Trilogy-City-Angels-Aaron-Lux/dp/1535054328
Jul 12, 2016
Jul 12, 2016 at 7:25 PM UTC
Come on man,
get with the program,
things are moving at a speed,
that's the opposite of a slow dance,
so no there's no time for negativity,
not at all not even a chance,
it's time to advance into the 21st Century,
we're no longer Cavemen & the Dark Ages have long ago passed,
& even though the Past has passed,
sometimes it still haunts our Collective Memory,
like that guy from Memento trying to count back to this moment now,
got the invitation long ago but still don’t know who sent for me,
but unlike that guy from Memento when I put back the pieces of the puzzle,
I hope I don't find a sick plot twist like discovering that I murdered my wife,
see sometimes we are our worst enemy plus memories can be tricky,
so I tread carefully as I retrace my steps that led me to this moment in time,
& I’m so fckn Emo for still dealing with these feelings,
of being in love with those that don't love me & pretending I don't give a fck,
even though I’m afraid of real emotions & afraid to show them & it shows,
so I guard my Heart’s ramparts & stand guard as my own Sentry ****
& I'm just so over not being able to get over it that I'm sick to my stomach,
& of course I have regrets from my past,
& of course I have pain I mean who doesn’t have at least some of that,
but resilience is one of the main keys to not suffering defeat,
I mean at least not in the streets by the hands of a Broken Soldier in retreat,
or a Soulless body that sold it's soul to party or an Emotional Zombie,
both as outdated as the old Atari & sorry but I suggest you press delete,
& that's why I won't engage with any more enraged psychopaths,
I’ve been down that road before so now I know better than that,
no Sir, no Ma’am, instead, I am, on what, They call, The Path,
in a forward upwards onwards motion on a sorta sorted NoWarPath,
& you can go ahead & hashtag that,
if you want to attempt to invent a fad,
here I'll do it 1st & you can do it 2nd,
& hey 2nd isn't 1st but hey it's also not last so really it's not bad,
#NoWarPath
don't want to rain down a shower of bullets,
would rather just take a bubble bath...
excerpt from The Holy Trilogy Vol. 2: Manadalas
available world wide here: www.amazon.com/dp/1721134158
Aug 28, 2018
Aug 28, 2018 at 4:19 PM UTC
Relax For Real
Want to relax,
but feel so fckn lonely,
so I put the pen to the paper,
hoping for a connection that won’t be phony,
let’s not pretend to pretend,
let’s keep it real and act true only,
every line’s a quote the pens sets trends,
broken dreams with heavenly hopes makes reality holy,
and yes,
you can quote me,
and yes,
I’d like to quote you too please,
see I want to relax,
but I feel so fckn lonely,
so I put the pen to the paper,
hoping for a connection that won’t be phony!
∆ Aaron LA Lux ∆
∆ Aaron LA Lux ∆
'777' available worldwide
www.amazon.com/dp/1548700746
Jul 23, 2017
Jul 23, 2017 at 2:11 AM UTC