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B Dec 2018
Cold fingers
dance across my skin.
Too bad, from me, they linger
not him.
B Nov 2020
My indigo
where did you go?
Far off to
lands of who and why
to color another purple sky,
a little more blue.
B Mar 3
How lovely you look, so lit up.
I always keep my room
glowing like a subtle dream
sunset; orange, lavender, vibrant peach.
Now you're mine in the midnight hour
overcome by it, for a week.
Hoping you'll notice
the lonely pothos leaves
she's survived so much
we have both survived living with me.
I never liked this town
but you are so beloved
brought you here
now we're so above it.
Sipping on french champagne
(forgot to budget)
no worries, I'll be gone
this time next year
in some strange place with the curtain drawn
thinking of us here.
B Oct 2022
You are a thunderstorm of passion
the sky falters with heat until she must fracture and downpour.
I am waiting for my affections to unfasten
- for my summer to be drenched -
It seems I'm always waiting another sweltering day, another aching inch.
Looking for value although I am not poor.
Missing rain outside my front door
and yet I've always been alone in this sea of sheets
gazing, yearningly, at the flooding streets.
B Aug 2021
Felt so long like Eros sat in prison,
let my blood pale from crimson.
Until you cast your shadow to my sun
made of all sweet smelling things and neurolysin.
Undid my braid
every tangled knot, and auburn strand; one by one.
I could not define safety, until with you I laid
and showed, to my temple, the steel of gun
see now, even fear is manmade
as the legs of fate's circle on run.

Do you know what it is to feel complete
and still sing the lonely song of sailors?
As your darling walks with slow feet
what thoughts of me, will you savor?
Would never need to see another sky - by makers
so long as I could look into your eyes so blue,
so sweet.
I wish I could say I love you
but I am so new and weak.
So I sit, and stir, and tear up papers;
wait another rosy day for you to speak.
I wish I could say I love you
and you would repeat the words, caught between cheek.
B Oct 2023
I'll be nothing in your backseat
resting your hand on my upper thigh.
So high when I'm feeling your energy
and down with a lower case lie.
I'm searching for rain,
in an endlessly cloudless sky
gazing through your drought ridden eyes
and gasping into ground, always dry.

It's so gentle that I bleed
strawberries, lip balm, summer breeze
things I always thought I'd lost,
joy was too quick to take its leave.
Be my sugar, to the lemon that I squeeze
be my greatest chase, after all
we are free.

Past the tattoo parlors and broken freight trains
scared we'll run out of town before long.
Rubbing you out of my mind like an ink stain.
I'm not sure I've ever really been strong
can't find where I stand and you remain,
you tell me, what is right and what is wrong.
Wondering, if like mine,
does your face ever grow red
like a rising Aries dawn?
Always unsure why I showed you my tan lines
when you're so alright having nothing on.
B Jan 2023
When you're out on the water
and the sun becomes sea
two planes of reality
begging to meet.
There is no horizon
no end to my sight
only the certainty of knowing
at least, in nothingness,
things will be alright.
B Nov 2023
Something unforgivable
blood in the wool of a lamb
you said I'd be this way forever
I am. I am. I am.

You're quiet as a child sings a hymn
someone so soft and angelic
shouldn't witness such a sin.
Where is your shepherd,
where is your father?
Can all really be healed
with just holy water?
B Mar 4
Texas is as hot as hell
and looks like it sometimes too
but I can't leave, it's paralyzing,
I love it like I'm dazed and confused.
Know I'd miss the flat green land
and always knowing what comes next
yearning for the shade of the soft, dark pine
crackled leather growing on my neck.
Here, you cannot hide from the sun
it chases you like a bird of prey
yet I have learned to live with it
I rise and I kiss it, never stray.
And I can sit and drink
like I am baptized from the inside out
this is the easy way
to taste freedom in the South.

It takes forever just to get out of this state
stretched as wide as the chasm of my mind
so long a journey from ear to ear
what am I supposed to find?
Left alone with no friend but my thoughts
what terrible company they are.
At least the skies are open here
I can find familiarity with my lone star.

Sometimes people leave,
in a chase of meaning, and perhaps some hope
but they will always come back
unforgivingly pulled by an invisible rope.
I'll let my curiosity wander
but not for too long
Rough cowboy reminds me
where I belong.
B Aug 2023
Things hidden,
like the subtle and iridescent pink
timid, from inside a calcified seashell
mother nature's knowing wink.
So alive and shimmering
beneath the water's lapping grasp.
She's lived so many times
gazing up at ancient stars,
pleasant and silvery in a sky so vast.
I am hidden
looking out at my sunburned world
scared to move my hand from my brow
and let the light cast an aura through my tears.
Wishing to things, thousands of years,
so truly far away.
Show me how
to creep alone, along this way.
B Nov 2018
It is a giggle
becoming, little by little,
an arrow split down the middle
Cupid brought me no signal.
Ah! How laughter makes life such a riddle.
B Mar 8
I want to touch the back of your throat
to feel you at your weakest
when I am needing you most.
I want to be in your brain and in your body
like I am the parasite
and you are my host.
Invite me in
the door is shut and
my patience has gone thin.
Everything has it's purpose
down to original sin
you don't have to look so nervous
I only want to be friends.

Be mine, be with me forever
this obsession that grows
you will not successfully sever
until I am done with you
the feast and the pleasure
and I've taken all that I need.
So hungry, I'm all alone
I just want to feed
you are the forbidden fruit
sometimes,
loving feels just like greed.
B Nov 2020
Pluck one from the skyline, high above my head
seems like all the sunflowers,
back from summer's heated dread.
I thumb those million petals, counting off and down the way
hoping to hear a "loves me not"
when all that yellow falls away.
He smiles on me with pleasantness, subtle blush along his jaw
and still, I cannot forget her name,
her name the crows on call.
B Apr 2022
I stare into your copper penny eyes
fresh from the sandy shore
and wonder, oh wonder
why don't mine look like that anymore?

Where the Applewood used to grow
and cotton blew lazy in the August breeze.
Back when you still kissed my cheek,
a time I allowed myself to breathe.

White house on the corner of Lover's lane.
Shaded, by the dapple of your lies
whispering of how we'd one day
look through its stained window panes
and plant red dahlias on its sides.

That birch wood is rotting now,
beetle has made it her home.
And I still recite unheard wedding vows
even after you are gone
and I; alone.
B Nov 2023
Tonight
the moon flashes a cheshire grin.
I've been walking miles and miles
just to see where you have been.
I'm by your house, I'm at the old creek
places we used to love and we used to speak.
It's a reverie, it's an illusion
emotions from a fire that burns to expulsion.
Chasing away the demons and the regrets
you've crucified my frame
and I know you cannot forget.

To think,
I've been talking with you in dreams
I need to meet you again
and figure what they must mean.
Going to bed early
and losing so much sleep.
I'm dancing with you all night long,
come on, answer me.

The coyotes were killed off years ago
but they still howl the same
and sweet dew settles on green, green grass
soon as mourning doves call your name.
I've been ready for forever
but you still want to play games.
B Nov 2021
You touch like Midas;
turn everything to an apricot hue.
I want to taste the honey off your breath
and lay my chest down next to you.
As timeless as salt air by the sea
my hand under yours
and your heartbeat beneath me.

I find myself in forever
counting the freckles upon your shoulder.
Gather up your handsome frame
and still wish a way to hold more.
This happiness, I will not let my misery maim,
I dare not even whisper your name
-although to shout-
I wish I could.
B Feb 17
Lost childhood
a shattered snow globe on the floor
enchanting glitter and broken glass,
swirling in a mass, I find no cure.
Swept up the shards
that faintly jingled while being discarded
cut myself cleaning the mess
and it scarred
a surface of me that must stay hardened.

So independent
I can live on my own
don't know what's best
but it's better unknown.
I am shaped the way you had me sculpted
I've got a sharpness deep inside
here's the woman that has resulted
from a young girl's need to hide.

Mom
I brought a portrait photo of you
with me to art class
the teacher said
I looked just the same
everyone always told me I was like my dad
I was so happy to be beautiful, that day.

and I know you've said you don't understand poetry
so I'll say it easy
I love you so much
I hope you don't hate me
for what I used to be.
Forgive the broken snow globes
I have already forgiven the memories.
B Dec 2018
He was a morning lullaby,
and I, a sleepless night.
So, lay in my bed hypnotized
fading and felt right.
Down in the lawn
early dew,
I lean against the steady pecan,
the only stable thing I ever knew.
Silken sheets
and rosy eyes
I am a set piece
in a game of lies.
Sometimes, think I've up and died
at the waking shore.
Yes, he be a morning lullaby,
come to sing once more.
B Apr 2023
Where the air is thin and flowers grow a plenty
take me where it hurts to breathe
where the sun embraces me, so gently
and the towns are quiet but friendly.
We shall fashion daisies into wreathes,
watch as the aspen births her leaves
into crimson colors, so many.
B Oct 2023
Don't think I'll go on, but I can
my mother is kicking me out
and I've never had a plan.
Fizzled out with your opening
crushed like a soda pop can
so insecure, pushed you away
because you know just who I am.

On such a breathless downward spiral
and I think I'll stay here a while.
baggy shirts and sunken eyes
has become my style.
I'm a muddled, mangy mess, no surprise
I think I'll just stay a child
be soft in my stride
for just a little while
until I learn to get by.
B Jun 2021
Hello again-
Cover my bones with your cardigan
how long have you been a necro baby?
Cause' I've been dead since 2010.

Am I still cold?
when you wrap that woolen yellow round my back
Is my body old?
as you stroke blackberry lips with the breath that I lack.

Do you like the way
my eyes
- still alive -
never shut?
Someone can finally stand to look on you,
man of sin, skin, bore; a mutt.

Can you feel the dryness beneath my throat?
Watch the insects flee my face
and see the rot of teeth in the midst of groan.

Hello again.
Bramble crowned amongst worst of men.
How long have you been a necro, honey?
Cause' I'm dead as poet's pen.
B Nov 2018
Sometimes, when I look up at the sky I see
more faces smiling back at me.
That make me clean,
wash dark indigo over the scene.
Of the twisted human being,
our body’s simple liberty.
Sunshine never brought me glee
because under the light, much you can see.
Everyone has security,
secrets whispered cautiously.
The stars, they weep with me
for all we cannot teach
For that reason we remain
out of mandkinds reach.
B Apr 2022
Poseidon mourns with the mumbling sea,
froths and foams and falters,
for everything I long to grieve.
Silver tears fall, the fruit of tree.
I grow her from the cut of me,
watch her take up roots and leave.
Wait, while she becomes all I thought I'd be
and steals the silence from my memory -
abandons peace for chase of ecstasy.

I joined the worshiped in their gentle garden
and trampled every orchid, bright and sweet
just to prove I could win such pardon,
live to die another week.
We were all of warm and wild
skin feverish to lonely sun god's touch.
My tongue took blood of grape so mild
I found myself -nothing- in the middle of much.
B Jun 2023
You're always mad and I'm always late
we both have so much to give
and don't want to take.
Splitting our coin, our apples, our lives
wondering when it became a two person game
how love became a creature, trying to survive.

And I still chase fireflies,
sing to a series of moons
as summer rolls by
while you grow tired of the wild cries,
sounds of me licking my wounds.

You hate pollution
but I'd miss searching for sea glass
in oceans
so far away and vast.
Let's just see how long this lasts.

I call them wildflowers
you say they are weeds.
I think of wants
and you know of needs.
We are, nothing alike,
but so full of greed.
How can I make you happy
when we only want to be freed?
B Jun 2022
Of grey set eyes
deep like oyster shells
I think you could be of Aphrodite's demise
secrets, your smile, certainly tells.

I want to wear her sweater over my own
don't wish to speak to anyone, it shouldn't be known

Your eyes were oyster shells
holding everything precious and tender
in the pit of their teasing,
lay tide pools of splendor

I would not say I love you like a pearl
because you cannot be hung on string
with the likes of every other beautiful boy or girl
that is an insult to even finer things
the presence beyond this world
B Jul 2021
I want to touch you until my hands lose grip and meaning,
and we've lost the world we thought to be seeing.
Til' from my palm,
gone,
the creases of fortune,
the mangle of time.
I want to love you,
so true and so hard
even our kisses start to rhyme.
Wordlessly plead,
your worship, your prurience,
your where and when.
The ache of my silent needing
dripping on down your chin.
B Nov 2020
Your words to me
like teeth plunge into a peach
the pink of gum and blood on tile, white.
Lately you have much to teach;
lonely, stone fox is not evil to be,
only when he tears at mouse does it not feel right.
Lets her live with muscles tight...
Trust has replaced the holy three,
made peace an enemy
in her robes of sweet and jasmine green.
And now your smile, by sunlight, bleached
curse the rays that rise on East
and breaks the skin of a rotten peach.
Waits for the glory of ending's blinding light
so glad it stole away my sight...
and I can only feel the dampness in my bed at night.
B Jul 2021
I am
goddess of wet feet and sunken things
wandering thoughts, broken dreams
and all the seashells children never claim
I am goddess of a misty rain.

Mermaid tears that shine like opal
and promised ring of empty proposal.
Whispers heard from the depth of tide,
a lonely ghost without another beside.

Sand upon the crease of weathered skin
how long it takes, years and years
of "when?"

Lilac scented candles, hovering in the stark of night
I am goddess of hand struck - albite.
I am goddess of all things that will never go right
of moon waning, of sweat beads, fallen kite.

Spilled champagne upon a dusted floor
dying breath...we ask for more.
Romance, you and I could never adjure
I am goddess they seldom kneel for
a woman sheepishly dying, along with her lore.
pisces zodiac zodiacsigns signs astrology love unrequitedlove
B Dec 2019
Mouth to plum, bruised blue and black
it's always guilt, the wild eyes lack.
It's always pansies, blooming down my back
If you could ever think to love me - attack.
Feel my fingers, feel my nerves
boy,
relish my blindness, dampen my words.
Eat me alive,
I've forgotten what it is to die.
Forgotten how to bring my ****** lips to wine
and let you shove away the tears - I'm dry.
The beauty of petals, what do they serve,
to only dry and fall dead from a flower,
when the sun is not hers?
B Nov 2020
Some say I have a poet's mouth
but, I am mute
until touched by a lustrous moon
drowned in black river; south.
A breath of song, sung autumn by
he left, he gone, I die, I die.

Oh death's cold shiver and rotten hand
against times of gold arising,
found me in my crowded solitude and
kept sure the sun could not shine to me.
B Nov 2019
in my coarse sorrow
and aching qualm
i think of febrile tomorrows
for
what am i
but a girl obsessed with winter’s poppies
in a torrid mid-July
B Aug 2022
You were my Queen of rust
with your china doll hands and terracotta hair
lady of want and broken trust
friend of wild dog, promised to be fair.

A bush fire against a summer's rain
you are every little ache and pain
Open eye as the clock races by
a ghost town
torn down
again and again...

Let yourself dream in the mystery of sundown
but, where has your lover gone now?
Off to a land lush with the green of sycamore
the promise of something that again, has been found.
She has no use for a dessert or
a woman made of many shades of brown
when there was so much more color
before you came around.
B Feb 2021
I am tired of being a ****** property,
by the time I have grown into my skin
all I ought to be
is cloth of a million miles,
I become the sea.
Blamed for men and their poverty,
lack of shame and social precocity
- inspired by years of gulosity -
my sisters and me,
so eroded by eyes, we've reached our callosity.
Woman, with him at war, must reap the sorrows of the land.
Simple and pacing solution; I must reap the life from man.
Red
B Nov 2018
Red
The color of cherries
of blood and wine.
The feeling of passion,
your skin on mine.
It’s on that sweatshirt
and your face too.
A can of cola
my favorite lipstick hue.
The way we always talk
neon lights at 4 o’clock
in the morning.
The kind of color that makes me deny
everything my mother ever told me.
The color of you and I.
B Jan 2020
I remember
what it was like.
In the rain, in the night.
Clothed in ******,
cold like starlight.
Trees of black and green, on bending to our will.
Every creature, every soul, every stirring eye; still
Waist deep in regretting
and head, so far under all I loved forgetting.
Your smile, like a boy's, so plain and youthful
my eyes, so wrong, too old...too truthful.
All I could feel was the weight of those hands
couldn't suffer my yearning, though I could understand.
The next wake and early morning
I walked in solitude, the fool's crown adorning.
As you shuffled on home, shoes to the sidewalk, slide
I, twelve paces behind, pretending it was your side.
Become bluer on bluer as you step with the lines,
so I cursedly follow
picking up rays the sun left behind.
B Nov 2019
Sweat,
on the sheets of another.
His silhouette
a tasteful composure.
Blood of my lips
savior
to desolate, desperate fingertips.
Savor me,
far gone
the ocean breeze.
Down the avenue
wet foot.
You, I miss you...
B May 2021
Our world was cemented fresh linoleum tile
you always bent down to reach my voice,
I was so sweet, I feel so vile.
You tell her she reminds you of daisies and August sunshine
I smell out the ***** of cinnamon, I am canine.
Thought you were all mine.

I know she's breathless
as you shake the bed,
dancing dyad, snowed with asbestos.
And I could be edgeless
sand myself down just for you.
Polish every crevice,
I am a god in a teenage body
I could be edgeless
like a marble cast of paresis
settled upon your pew.
B Jun 2023
Second guessing my goodbyes
cursed us back in February
but now it is July.
Found myself hot and running
full sprint, shirt unbuttoned
back to you,
you are something.
Something to chase
and something to hold
a flame worth protecting
a memory, not yet too old.

It's been 5 years
but I still wish you'd touch me again
bring life back to my skin.
My eyes will grow wide like a deer's
blood rush to my ears!
For you I am prey,
and I hope you know, my dear
no one has ever seen me that way
never been permitted to stay
and to smell my humbling fear.
B Oct 2023
Beautiful queen of the sky
Andromeda
stars buried in your eye.
How did you learn to get by,
only the moon to befriend
is he really so great a guy?

I try to be lonely too
be content with
just a lovely view.
It's all still nothing new
I'm growing tired
of my own company too
and the bitter coffee that I brew.

So done with waking
to the somber dark.
My misfortune, I'm mistaking
for some philosophical spark.
Still the dawn is not breaking
and I'm after blood like a ravenous shark
this silence, I am taking
- goodbye -
to the still night I must embark.
B Oct 2022
You are, a tide pool's worth of a *******
cascading jump on a trampoline.
You are more than you seem
with your clean cut hair and your magazines
to think you don't know how much you mean
to a ******* the tipping edge of nineteen
ready to risk it all before she's done with everything
it takes to grow into something strong and seen.
What life stubbornly brings
at the end of fate's red string
B Dec 2018
As transparent as Galveston water,
my only is.
Sunlight to the Earth.
I am drawn back and forth.
Summer, my lover.
B Dec 2018
Hands,
sleeves pulled over.
head lowered.
And
touch me slower,
your soul, I beg closer.
Barren land,
I am
a temperament of dry sands.
Hands,
break me
and build me into something of sensuality.
B Nov 2019
for more months, i talked to his mirror
because he always looked right back at my own
moon-straught face
he always looked clearer.
from there he seldom strayed from perfect,
he never spoke wise
it seemed he was only reciting my words, disguised.
still, the man that i saw,
through silvery sheen
was so much easier to love and to keep evergreen.
B Nov 2018
If a painter
took his brushes unto me.
Would I remain a stranger?
His hands were stone,
cold and alone.
Yet his eyes steady as a storm.
And I, a simple masterpiece
afraid only to be torn.
B Jan 2019
In winter you can look and look around
but still, as every man has found,
there is no rose.
Girls of calm and February lies
spring and warmth's beginnings.
Always right and sweet and wise -
steal the pleasures of living.
When all has been promised as forever
how am I to refrain?
But then, soon as ruby leaves dissevered,
he left me miseries, left me rain.
For roses bloom on ****** skin
not on libeled skulls
accused of sin.
B Nov 2018
An astronaut,
sad and alone.
Came from below;
land of unknown.
To take a chance
and,
ask Venus to dance.
Mankind tends to forget
about what they once loved
especially because they never look up above.
With all her glory and lavender light,
distracted he was
from his infamous flight.
And blissful as ever,
down he fell
bid her farewell.
The universe, it works oddly
a man in love
falls with his whole body.
B Jul 2021
My face redder
with every breath I withheld
and I think you could be better
If you loved like what my mind did weld.
Veil had no need to cross my face
only wished, for so long, to look in your eyes,
and match the drum of your feet as you paced.
I don't think I wanted you -
just someone there when I passed on
so no one could whisper of how
I was so alone when I had gone.
B Nov 2018
All my pleasures be to the skies
why, oh, why
do I only love what’s beyond my eyes?
B Nov 2018
Untie me
from this trap you’ve weaved,
silken lies, flowing as the sea.
How it would feel, being released.
Though, you enjoy the tease
rhythm of impossibility.
So I stay on my knees,
an image of the love you need.
B Mar 18
Took a day trip to the beach
just to bury my head in the sand
Restless is the water
changing is the land.
We're miles away from each other
you're holding onto my hand.

Stare down at the shoreline
something fuzzy waving a warning in red
but I only ever learned about surrender
I'm bored and off my meds.
Your dark sunglasses are reflective
it's going to your head
I had a thought, so terribly perceptive
it's just something that I said.

Deep and beaconing ocean
is cold and I am unprepared
choking on my way back to the surface
getting sick on the drink that we shared.
Fruitless journey back to our spot
you could save me, wish you cared,
but you do not.

Talking together about something so strange
you say you like me and the way that I smile -
like I'm kind of insane.
Kiss you like I miss you
like there's an itch in my brain.
I like your bright nirvana thoughts
and the way you never seem to change.
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