Love!

I cannot eat,
I cannot sleep,
Night, day?
I can not say!

The wondering of when am I going to see you again?!
Yesterday blurs into today,
Today blurs into tomorrow.
The vicious cycle of over thinking continues yet again!

I’m tiered!
I’m drained!
I’m emotionally exhausted!

I want to rest,
I want to sleep!
But it’s too late I’ve dived in way too deep,
And I would love to know what’s next!

The feeling of being sick to my stomach,
Knowing you can’t talk to me.
The feeling of disappointment,
Because the message wasn’t from you.

Do you see what you’ve lead to!
Do you see what you’ve done to me!
Do you see what I have to battle with everyday?

As much as it causes pain I still look for the best,
Your eyes looking at me like I’m the best there ever was,
You smile so bright it warms me up inside,
And your touch so hot on my skin that I cannot breathe!

Yet your still not free,
Your still no man of mine.
Yet there’s so much hope,
You’ll one day be my man!

You came like a storm in my life, unexpected, leaving a big mess behind
Do you remember us laying on the grass watching the stars?
Me laying my head on your shoulders, feeling safe and protected close to you
It hurts so much that I lost you
I lost the most precious person I have ever met
You opened my eyes and made me experience what real love feels like
I can't forget your eyes, your glances, your smile and your laugh
I never opened up before, I never came to someone so close
I thought I can't, I couldn't open up to anyone
But with you, I didn't recognize myself
I was happier, your positive charisma pulled me along with it
You always listened to me, never interrupted me, you even listened, when I made the dumbest jokes and laughed with me.
You made my heart race.
Looking into your eyes would make my whole body shiver
I trusted you so much that I gave you my first kiss.
I found the person that I always dreamed of and lost that person
We let our love fall
Because the reality devoured us
Our families could never accept our love
Because of our different nationalities
Aren't we all human?
But we were too weak
We couldn't lose our families
They were too important to us
So we let our love fall, we did what they wanted.
Now all we have left are the memories we made.
I don't wake up happy anymore, the world now seems dark and boring to me.
You won't knock at my door anymore.
You won't sing loudly to songs in your car with me anymore (even though, you couldn't sing at all)
There won't be your smell all over my room anymore
You won't give me your jacket because I have cold anymore
I won't feel your kisses anymore
Will I ever forget you? I don't want to.
Two lovers gave up, they didn't fight.
And now they try to continue with their life
But it won't be the same anymore because they both still have each other on their minds.
How unexpected life can be.
In one day you meet a person and this person will steal your heart and change your entire life.

I just hate this, I don’t hate you
until we kiss I’ll escape you
oh where’s the twist, I’m enraged, who’s
the god of fate to complain to

do you love me like I love you?
but I always know when a love’s true
see fire, into it I tune
chemistry shatters the whole room

sent me an angel too early
you are too pretty and pearly
and you could heal me or hurt me
I’m bad and broken, you’re holy

too much unspoken, you don’t see
below the surface I’m hurting
I dream of barriers burning
you pull me back as I’m turning

run with me, keep this a secret
make up for a life filled with regret
exiled societal rejects
star crossed love lost, now we reflect

I severed ties, sent a letter
the final feeling, forget her
bore the burden, barely better
she’d lose her life, they won’t let her

the fantasy failed to survive
it was as though she had just died
our dangerous dance was denied
fell into smoking, drugs and wine

so hollow without the saviour
forced to get stronger and braver
seek solitude that I favour
give myself the love I gave her

can’t give the choice to the chosen
goodbye, our meaningful moments
in november were the omens
in winter forever frozen

I picture your arms around me
Caressing my hair behind my ear
Oh what I would for you to really be here

I’d cross the seven seas just to see you smile
Just to feel your warm embrace I’d walk a hundred miles
Just to see you for a while those are the things I’d do
Because nothing, truly nothing, compares to seeing you

beautiful towers
crescent moon
under the bridge we hid from few
outlookers who saw us hand in hand
oh sue, nevermind next to you, I'll always stand

you said, "emily look out"
they can't catch us when we're on the periphery of your town
flower braids and hazy smiles
playing hide and seek up till a peculiar height

sue you do a lot of things
you say things so lovely
the only name ever
dancing on your tongue should be "emily"

harnessing a lot of love
my tongue's still tied, your face is unsure
tracing a pattern and making it travel through your moles

sue please dont give in
my heart's still beating
they can't know about us
and if they do
come with me
to the land of cottagecore

and if you say no then these all will be my questions,
"why would you touch me in a way your touch will linger?"
"why would you leave your best friends for a wine and some mingle?"
"why would you risk your life when i know your feelings dont fickle?"
"why would you gift me that pendant made of gold and covered in nickel?"
"why would you choose your abundant hours to teach me how to whistle?"
oh Sue, i know
you will never say no
just know, if you ever say yes
its you forever and ever and ever more.

This life does not taste alive
Like a body without an owner
Pain dances over my bitter life
Does life feel like death?

You, the only gift in my life
We met at the wrong time
However, it didn't matter
Time is transitory
We are both immortal

The Universe seems to be challenging us
Are you sure we can change destiny in the end?

Tonight
I want to sleep in your eyes
Hope the sun doesn't show itself.
At least, until I close my eyes.