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Nomkhumbulwa Oct 3
Twenty years ive known you,
Shocking as this sounds,
Back then I was a different person
My identity not yet found

I remember it well,
Meeting you online,
Intruiged by another culture
You were the mysterious one online!

I was obsessed with Geography
Knew every flag of the world
Spent hours staring at maps
I would never get bored

I knew I never belonged
In the land I was living then
So the atlas was an escape
From the confusion since I was ten

You spoke a different language
From the mysterious side of the world
I was fascinated by and drawn to
This different side of the world

It was an honour to meet you
I felt I was so lucky!
I now had a Russian friend
Although his English hard to comprehend

This made it just more interesting,
It showed language didnt matter
We were still able to communicate,
Even by postal letters!

I was young, insecure,
Brainwashed too at that time,
So this escape was a relief
The mysterious person online!

You temporarily rescued me
From the weirdness of my home
I dont have many fond memories
But meeting you was one

I bought a book because of you,
Called "learn Russian in 3 months"
I was drawn to the Cyrillic alphabet,
But only now 20 years on can I use it!

Russian in 3 months was hilarious,
It was never going to work
Three years yes maybe,
Thats what the title should be!

But such was your desire for English
Your skills overtook mine,
Now im surrounded by Russians,
....I wish Id learned more at the time!

By the time you came to visit
Id escaped to Scotland,
I was somehow free,
Although not yet entirely

The brain is great at deleting
Large parts of my life
But you kept all the postcards and letters
I was so surprised!

These things are like treasure,
Reminders of lost time,
Its good to regain the happy parts
And leave the rest behind

The phone call still makes me laugh
It took you so long to say each word
Even my cruel mother gave up
Trying to wait for the words

I remember the day so well
She called me to the phone
Told me theres a message
Then she left me alone!

Weird behaviour for my mother
The perplexity on her face
As she listens to the message
From a mysterious place

Now twenty years on
You've rescued me again
I got myself in a pickle
And you came up with a plan

Most people didnt care
Those I chose to tell
Except an angel, Patricia,
Her Nigerian name too long to spell

She didnt even know me
I met her through a friend
A friend from Burundi,
Now living in Scotland

In my hopeless depressing reality
Sat in a place called Gillingham,
I spoke to you most evenings
You again allowed me to escape

I looked forward to reading your writing,
Learning more about your life,
Now with your improved English
I wanted to read it all night

You knew I was desperate to leave,
And you suggested Armenia,
A country I had heard of
But shamefully only little

Meeting you in Armenia
Was the best decision by far
The best decision I had made,
Since being torn from Africa

I knew very little about it,
And yet I was ready to go!
It just shows how desperate I was
To escape from where I never planned to go

I have to say, you saved me,
If only from myself
And of course from the NHS
Who probably would have killed me

They say things happen for a reason
The universe makes a plan,
So I guess if I wasnt deported,
I might not have seen you again

You have changed my life for the better,
Although you say you dont do charity,
You even left me with your bank card,
As well as a way to make money

You may not see yourself as kind,
But that is all I see,
And I have always loved you
Ever since I was twenty :)
B Oct 25
Don't think I'll go on, but I can
my mother is kicking me out
and I've never had a plan.
Fizzled out with your opening
crushed like a soda pop can
so insecure, pushed you away
because you know just who I am.

On such a breathless downward spiral
and I think I'll stay here a while.
baggy shirts and sunken eyes
has become my style.
I'm a muddled, mangy mess, no surprise
I think I'll just stay a child
be soft in my stride
for just a little while
until I learn to get by.
Anais Vionet Sep 29
You’ve probably seen them everywhere,
the grinning, happy, carefree teenagers,
mere children really.

I’m not a teenager anymore.
I started missing it last week,
because I knew I was losing it,
like a lover at the moment of separation.

Have I lost the fantastic glow of youth?
Maybe shrug
I know I’ve lost a lot of excuses,
“She’s just a teenager,” they used to say.

Well, they can’t say that after today.
‘Cause I’m a twenty-year-old
or am I a twenty-something?
I can’t wait to read the manual.

20, God, I feel so grown up.
Ceyhun Mahi May 2022
Milton! your youthful strife with fickle time,
Expressed with reason and an ancient rhyme,
Is something I endure at twenty-three,
Wishing much more than what I'm meant to be.
Your time was different, when art had class,
When Thought had its respect among the mass.
I know that life is short but fine, when skilled
To see past the dread of living, and ill-willed.
I know that faith is quick to end, as death
Is quick to come – just only with one breath.
And though I'm ignorant of many ways,
I am much wise, because I know my place.
This quantity of wisdom was not a lot
For you, but much for me – yes – this aware Thought.
It was at this age that I had compiled all my poems from my teenage years into a single book, and began a new collection of poems, written in my twenties. I believe beginning this arrangement with this poem, some rhymed couplets, addressing John Milton, the great English poet, who also had written verses on becoming twenty-three, is a meaningful one.

''How soon hath Time the subtle thief of youth
Stoln on his wing my three and twentieth year!
My hasting days fly on with full career,
But my late spring no bud or blossom shew'th.''

– John Milton
Con Mar 2022
There is a lingering silence, I notice.
Everyone seems to becoming worlds apart.
how come we shy away from making friends as we grow older?
I S A A C Mar 2022
I'm 20 now, my logic still unsound
I still linger around and use **** to drown it out
I try to be perfect, be an adult, and keep working
but I am not perfect, it hurts knowing that it hurts showing that
but vulnerability is a virtue, I continue to work to
to shine my light to shed light on what might
be brewing under the surface, for a random observer
I'm 20 now, I hate the way it sounds
almost like the tik tok of a clock, I’m an adult now
my prime is coming to an end retail therapy to pretend
I'm not where I want to be, I'm not happy where I am
do I keep put on the track I'm on or do I switch lanes instead
too many tabs open in my head, too little time spent out of bed
I need to get on my own feet, I need to plant these seeds, I need to not burst at the seams
because I'm 20 now, cant wait to see it out
wondering where ill be, who’s beside me, and if I’ll still doubt
Khoisan Jan 2022
10days in on the roundabout
pretty soon it will be June
November stop lights,
Life is fleeting
Have a great year
in the here and now.
Raven Feels Nov 2021

bribed the day light to catch me
to welcome the dark night quickly
careful heels
afraid would sting would peel
to the rough ground's coldness
wore this covering black dress
walked on a damaged fate
all in the name of an elegant slate
silent walls no comment
a posture to the moon sent

the perfect hair scattered
my own self compliments flattered
alone for the mirror to be impressed
smiled and the reflection takes a guess
waved for the air
to feel attention somewhere
on that eye
smudged ink lines
vanilla hangs in the atmosphere
memories do nothing to fear

                                                           ­         --------ravenfeels
Man Apr 2021
what is it to be 40
twice the man, you were at twenty?
four times the man, you were at ten?
is it being wiser
and having your means meet the end?
finances sured up?
with no need, for to be the miser
a divorce or some
perhaps a strong marriage
polyamorous loves
to your heart's desire
addictions? vices? troubles stifling?
death breathing down your neck
to the thumping of your heartbeat
beads of sweat, gather
and run off your chest
like your shoes on the concrete
you are dying
even while you're living
and you know one day
it'll be your last
cause we only get so long
and time goes fast
a baby is born
the next afternoon
an old man is buried
tomorrow could never come
would you ever know it?
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